When Saint Goes Marching In (25 page)

That’s it, baby. Run.

Run because you can’t handle me right now.

Saint tamped down the whirl of emotions and finished showering. Upon entering the bedroom, his cell phone lit up. He picked it up and opened the messages folder.

There was a succession of angry, ranting text messages from Xenia, some quite explicit and mean spirited. Saint laughed and erased them but not before writing her back:

“I’d never cheat on you. You want me to make love to you again? You know the deal. Bring your ass home then and I will. You’re giving my ex exactly what she wanted. So either be the woman I love or move on. The choice is yours.”

He hit ‘Send’ before retreating to the kitchen to fix himself a bowl of Captain Crunch.

* * *

Three Weeks Later…

“Daddy can we do that again?” Hassani exclaimed as Saint carried Dakarai inside his mother-in-law’s house.

“Of course we can but not today. Your mother is going to kill me for letting you go on all of those rides, especially that real big one. Don’t tell her you cried on it,” Saint laughed.

“I don’t want nobody to know anyway!” Hassani insisted as he clutched his father’s leg.

“
Anybody
, to know,” Saint corrected.

Pam, Saint’s mother-in-law, greeted him at the door. “Hi Saint,” she said as she held her cigarette in her left hand reached up to kiss him on the cheek.

Xenia
came around the corner in her work clothing, her short sleeve purple blouse partially unbuttoned. She frowned and looked at him with disgust as he stood in the doorway, hugging her mother.

Clearly, she was actively in the midst of sexual withdrawal, going on three weeks now.

You did this to your goddamn self, Xenia. Now look at you, needing dick-tox and Saint rehab.

He smiled.

The smell of frying hamburgers filled the air.

“You eat anything at that fair, baby?” Pam asked Saint as she sashayed back into the kitchen.

“Mama, I really hope you are talking to the boys and not inviting Saint for dinner,” Xenia remarked, flustered.

“Xenia, this is my mothafuckin’ house. When you go back to yo own house, you can have control ova who is there and who ain’t,” Pam chided.

Saint, Hassani and Dakarai followed behind her, Saint winked as he walked past Xenia.

Xenia
rolled her eyes. “This is unbelievable,” she muttered, shaking her head.

“Naw, what’s unbelievable is you two carryin’ on like this. Look Xenia, I don’t know if Saint is guilty or innocent,” Pam said as she turned down the heat on the simmering hamburgers, deep fried in grease. “But I do know that he treated my daughter good and had her mighty happy for a long while. He is a good father to my two grandsons and he has been trying to get your ass back home. All men cheat.” She grabbed a bag of frozen French fries from the freezer.

“Mama Pam, actually I didn’t do what…” Saint began.

“Don’t even say it, Saint. I swear you need to write a book on how to lie over and over again with a straight face. On another note, I don’t appreciate Latrice calling me the other day trying to have Bible study on the phone and praying for our marriage with all of her church friends on three-way!” Xenia slumped down in her seat.

Saint sighed. “I didn’t tell her to call you. She must’ve done it because she cared.” Saint looked back at his mother-in-law. “That smells good, Mama Pam.”

Xenia
rolled her eyes at him. “Saint doesn’t eat beef, pork or any red meat at all,” she said with a pouting lip.

“Mommy, Daddy picked me up and I made a basket! I won a big green teddy bear but it’s still in tha car.” Hassani blurted excitedly. “We already ate, too.”

“I know you did, baby. Daddy said that you all were going to get something but if you want a burger, you can have that, too,” Xenia smiled.

Saint seethed. She knew he didn’t want them eating red meat.

“Saint, I didn’t know you was one of them vegetarians,” Pam said. “It makes sense though now that I think about it. Hassani and Dakarai only want fish sticks, fruit and vegetables. Even at your cookouts I never saw you eat the ribs Xenia prepared, you only ate the chicken and turkey franks. I guess Xenia got that from you. She told me she didn’t eat any cow or pig anymore right after you two got married.” Pam laughed. “Shit, I do. I love me some swine!”

“He’s not a vegetarian, Mama. He eats meat, but only like chicken, turkey and fish,” Xenia responded. “A vegetarian doesn’t eat chicken or turkey either.”

“Why are you speaking on this man’s behalf? I’m sure he has a mouth that he can use just fine.” Pam turned back to the skillet.

You’re damn straight he has a mouth and can use it just fine!- and I’m not getting any of it. That’s the problem!
Saint heard Xenia’s thought and smirked.

“Mama Pam, I’d like some fries though,” Saint said as he sat down at the table.

He refused to make eye contact with Xenia who was now boring holes into him with her dagger-like looks. She was likely fuming over the fact that he’d ignored the hostile text messages she’d sent him over the past three weeks.

“Your pride is going to mess you up, Xenia,” her mother blurted, seeming to read Saint’s mind as she washed the pan out of consideration for his dietary requirements. “This man is bringing in the dough, paying the bills, coming over here all the time to see his children, taking them every other weekend and trying to get you back. He even dropped me a few dollars towards the bills. When you had me watching them for a few hours every day awhile back, I assumed he was takin’ care of you in other ways, too!” Pam laughed. Xenia stared resolutely out the window, stubbornly avoiding her mother’s eyes.

“It’s nice to know I have your support, Mama.” Xenia slapped her hand on the uneven table. “I caught him red handed. I feel like everyone is crazy except me!” Xenia exclaimed.

“I’m not supporting shit that is wrong. You’re wrong, Xenia. He ain’t never gave you a reason not to trust him anymore and the one time he mess up, you hang him for it. I don’t condone what Saint did, but it happened, it’s ova and it’s time to move on. Everyone deserves a second chance.” Pam said as she placed the burgers on a plate and put the fries in fresh vegetable oil.

“I could consider that if he owned up to it, and manned up.” Xenia snorted.

Saint waved her off and turned away angrily. “I’m not going to own up to something I didn’t do. You want me to plead guilty to a crime that I’d have to do jail time for, for the rest of my life with you. For a split second early on in this mess, I contemplated just saying, ‘Yes, Xenia, I did it.’ But hell no! I’m not going to say I did it when I didn’t, just to appease you and then on top of that, have you bring it up every few weeks and use it against me. Oh, and stop talking about me in the third person! I’m sitting right here and this is not the conversation we should be having in front of our children.” Saint said crossly. “I understand that you already told them Mommy and Daddy are taking a break now, but they don’t need to hear all of the details.”

Xenia
nodded in agreement and remained quiet. The only noise was the sizzle of the hamburgers and the fries cooking up while Pam applied generous salt and pepper. Xenia watched as Saint and her mother laughed and talked. She grimaced as she watched him greedily stuffing his mouth with fries, just to spite her. Saint kissed his sons goodbye as they left the table to go play outside in the backyard. Xenia sat there looking out the patio door, watching her babies run and laugh.

Pam looked at both of them and smiled. “I sure wish you two would get this shit straightened out. Xenia, I want your angry ass out of my house. I love my grandbabies, but you need to go- with all of your rage and tantrums. I hear you crying at night. You love this man and miss him. Stop playing games.” She lit another cigarette and walked out of the kitchen, leaving them alone.

Xenia
huffed and crossed her legs. They both sat silently for over ten minutes.

“We’re not getting back together, Saint. No matter how much I miss you.” Xenia finally said.

“OK.” Saint said as he looked out at their children playing. “And when did you come to this conclusion?” he asked, trying to control his shattering heart and temper.

“Not too long ago. I can’t. I just don’t believe I’ll ever be able to get over it. I’ll never get that image out of my head, of you and her…and the way you keep denying it is just letting me know that you’ll do anything to not have to answer for this,” Xenia said, her voice shaking. “I’ll contact an attorney as soon as possible but I have other things to tend to first, but I
will
follow up.”

Saint stood up, pushed in his chair and sighed. “I’m sorry, Xenia. I guess I thought you were someone else, I thought you were my soul mate. I’ve obviously made a mistake, a
very
big mistake. I will always love you though and you know I’m going to take care of our children. I want you to be happy, I really do. So, anything you need, you just let me know, anything besides sex that is. That still is only reserved for my wife and you don’t want to be her anymore. Tell your mother I said ‘goodbye.’”

Saint slid the patio door open, walked out onto the grass and embraced his frolicking sons. He kissed their foreheads and rubbed their hair affectionately. He stood back up, re-entered the house, walked past Xenia avoiding eye contact, then out the front door and got in his car. He felt numbness coat him in gooey thickness, falling over his heart like tar. It had rescued him once before, right after his mother’s funeral and here it came again, wrapping him in unfeeling, coldness and a robotic heart that would never fail him again. “I’ll never fall in love again. It’s too emotionally expensive. Xenia, you
were
her but apparently even a soul mate can do the unthinkable,” he said aloud as he drove off into the dusky, California evening sunset.

* * *

CHAPTER EIGHT

“Are you sure about this?” James asked, looking Saint squarely in the face as he leaned over his desk.

“Positive. Let the training begin,” Saint said with certainty.

“You were so concerned before. What brought this on?” James adjusted his suit jacket sleeve and leaned back in his chair.

“Let’s just say I can focus on other things now. So, I have an update on the Clayman case,” Saint responded, quickly switching topics.

“OK, what is it?” James asked. He propped his feet on his desk and crossed his ankles.

“There have been no recent crimes, which is very unusual. He is going much longer than anyone would have guessed. I think I know why,” Saint explained. “I believe he may have left town and is starting over in fresh territory.”

James nodded. “So, you had mentioned to me that you wanted to follow up with Mr. Clayman.”

“Yes, I actually spoke to him this morning. Come to find out, the man I’ve been suspicious of did in fact quit his job and move. His forwarding address is in Denver, Colorado. I updated George but I’d like to go this one alone.”