When Mercy Rains (25 page)

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Authors: Kim Vogel Sawyer

BOOK: When Mercy Rains
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One quick bob of her head affirmed the unspoken statement.

Abigail frowned. “Then you lied to Alexa.”

Again Suzy nodded, this time her nod slow and agonized.

Abigail slumped back in her chair. The commandment concerning truth given by their Lord and Master played through her mind. She’d borne false witness for years, letting people believe Suzy had gone away to become a missionary nurse. Now Suzy was bearing false witness, withholding the truth of Alexa’s parentage. Such a mess. Such a big, big mess.

“Do you ever intend to tell her the truth?”

Suzy stared at Abigail, her face pale and her lips set in such a grim line they nearly disappeared from view. From the kitchen, the swishing noise stopped and Alexa began to hum, a sweet and lilting tune unfamiliar to Abigail’s ears. In
a few more minutes she’d come in with the cake topped by whipped cream. The sweet dessert would probably make Abigail sick to her stomach, but she’d eat it anyway. Every bite. As penance.

“Suzanne?”

Suzy finally answered. “Mother, I didn’t want to go away and give my baby to my cousins to raise. I did it because you said I had to. But Alexa is
mine
. I won’t give her up. The subject of her paternity is closed. Don’t ask me about it again.”

Alexa entered the dining room with a tray in her hands. Instead of plopping a dollop of whipped cream on top of the slices of cake, she’d done the opposite. The wedge of cake became a castle suspended on a cloud. The presentation was delightful, almost too pretty to desecrate with a fork.

“Here you are, Grandmother.” Alexa placed a dessert plate in front of her. “Mom, you get one, too, even though you didn’t eat your lunch.” Her lighthearted statement seemed to erase a portion of the tension hovering in the room. Two more plates remained on the tray. “I’m going to take one to Mr. Aldrich, and I think I’ll eat mine out there.”

Suzy jerked, as if zapped by a lightning bolt. “Alexa—”

Alexa headed for the front door without a pause. She called over her shoulder, “Enjoy!”

Suzy stared after her, worry knitting her brow.

Abigail wanted to tell Suzy she was wrong to keep Alexa from her father and wrong to keep Alexa’s father from knowing he had a daughter. It was wrong.
Wrong
. But Abigail couldn’t reprimand her. She’d set the example of fabrication herself. Her daughter was only perpetuating what she, the mother, had begun. Such a web they’d woven, and after all these years, it was probably foolish to think they could free themselves. She might as well reconcile herself to going to her grave with this burden on her heart.

Alexa

As soon as supper was over, Grandmother settled on the sofa with a book. Mom took over cleanup in the dining room. Derek caved to Ian’s begging to visit the litter of barn kittens Alexa had discovered earlier that day, but when Sandra started to follow Derek, Alexa commandeered her with a whispered, “Can we talk?”

Sandra agreed, and Alexa took her to the porch. Sandra lowered her cumbersome frame into Grandmother’s lounger, and Alexa perched on the edge of the swing. She shared her plans for surprising her grandmother with a party and a house makeover, watching Sandra’s face for signs of disapproval. None appeared.

“I love your ideas, Alexa.”

Sandra’s response sent a burst of joy through Alexa. She gave the porch floor a push with her feet and set the swing into motion. Her heart soared with the sway of the wooden swing. “Then you’ll help me? I want to invite everyone—all the people from church and members of your family who don’t live in Arborville but are close enough to drive over.” Wouldn’t Mom be surprised to have her cousins and other relatives in attendance?

Sandra lifted her hand to her brow, casting a shadow across her upper face. Mr. Aldrich had cut down several large bushes to make room for Grandmother’s ramp, and the evening sun now fell across the porch. “I’m willing to help with the party, of course, but the house painting?”

Alexa stopped the swing with a downward thrust of her toes. “What?”

Sandra stretched out her hand and brushed Alexa’s knee. “It’s a wonderful plan, but I’m not sure Mother would be in favor of a bunch of strangers coming out here and working. We had to fight with her to let Paul in, and she’s known him since he was a little boy. She’s rather … reclusive.”

“But you have to agree the house needs it. Think how beautiful it would be with a fresh coat of paint.” Alexa pulled out her phone, which she’d wrestled away from Mom after letting Grandmother examine each of the nursing applicants, and opened the photo gallery. “Scoot over a bit. Let me show you something.”

Sandra shifted slightly, opening a slice of space next to her hip. Alexa eased into the spot. The lounger’s metal legs squeaked, and Sandra grimaced. “I hope this thing will hold all three of us.” She cupped her belly. “This one sure makes me bulky.”

Alexa gazed for a moment at Sandra’s round, tight belly. What must it feel like to carry another life inside your body? Derek was so solicitous to Sandra, holding her arm as she went up and down stairs, helping her from her chair, gazing at her tenderly as if he thought her the most precious thing in the world. Poor Mom had been all alone. Little wonder she clung so tightly to her daughter.

Guilt tried to weasel its way into her thoughts, but she refused to give it sway. She wasn’t abandoning Mom. She was only bringing her back to the family who should have been there for her all along. She was doing
right
.

She punched the screen on her phone and brought up a photograph she’d downloaded from the Internet. “Look. This isn’t your farmhouse, but it’s similar in style, see? It has a third-floor attic with dormers and a porch that wraps around. There’s a lot more gingerbread on this one than on your house, but still … it gives you an idea how the house would look if it was painted something besides white-white-white.” She grinned to let Sandra know she wasn’t being critical.

Sandra took the phone and frowned at the image. “I won’t deny this house is lovely. I like the colors, too. But why so many?”

Alexa had chosen this image because of the color scheme. Soft saffron made a perfect background for the accent colors of dark ocher, slate blue, and bright white. Peaceful colors, yet eye-catching. The Zimmerman farmhouse’s unique window frames, corbels under the eaves, and fish-scale siding on the dormers would be showcased beautifully with the varied palette. “What’s wrong with having so many colors?”

Sandra sent Alexa an apologetic look. “Shelley would say the house looked like a peacock’s tail. Mother might, too. She isn’t one to be showy.”

Alexa hit the sleep button on her phone and the screen went black. So did her enthusiasm. She returned to the swing and sank down, defeated.

“Let me talk to Derek, okay? And maybe even Clete. I think it’s wonderful how you want to gift your grandmother. It’s a very extravagant gift! A party and her house painted? If you do all this she will never forget her sixtieth birthday, that’s certain.”

Alexa slipped her phone into her pocket. “Mr. Aldrich told me I’d need to make arrangements quickly because professional painters get very busy fast. So please talk to them soon.”

“How about now?” Sandra struggled to stand, and Alexa took hold of her hands to pull her upright. Sandra grinned a thank-you. “I’d like to see the kittens, so I’ll send Derek to you.” She started for the stairs in her waddling gait.

Alexa trailed behind her. “I’ll go with you. I want to see the kittens again, too. They’re so cute right now—so big-eyed and clumsy.”

Sandra laughed. She looped elbows with Alexa as they ambled across the lawn. “I’m going to ask a nosy question, and you don’t have to answer if you don’t want to, but where will you get the money to pay to have the house painted? I know what we’re paying Paul to do the remodeling needed. It’s a lot, and he’s giving us a discount since we’re from the same fellowship.”

Alexa didn’t mind being asked. Sandra wasn’t snoopy and critical like
Shelley, who had asked questions and then berated her for the answer. “I started working a part-time job when I was a sophomore in high school. Mom taught me to give ten percent to the church and encouraged me to put twenty-five percent in savings. I usually put closer to fifty percent in my savings account. When I graduated, I took a full-time job at the elementary school, working in the lunchroom, and I did the same with my salary. I’ve had enough to give Mom some for rent and utilities on our apartment, but Mom really wanted me to build my savings. So I’ve got more than enough in there to have the house painted.”

“Weren’t you saving for something special?”

Remembering Mom’s aghast outburst, Alexa hesitated. Would Sandra react like Mom? She stopped, drawing Sandra to a halt with her. “Is it against the … I don’t know what to call them
 … laws
of the church for Old Order Mennonites to go to college?”

“I think the word you’re seeking is
ordinance
. And our fellowship doesn’t strictly forbid college attendance. After all, there are some jobs—such as nursing, like your mother has done—that require more training than our local school provides. So if one of our young people believes God wants him to continue school for training in a specific field, he talks to the deacons. They all pray together and seek God’s guidance. Then the deacons either approve or disapprove the request based on what they think is best for the person and for the fellowship as a whole.”

“So the church operates like a family, in a way.”

Sandra smiled. “I like that description. A loving family should have each member’s best interest at heart.”

“Did Mom get approval to become a nurse before she left?”

Sandra’s smile faded. “I was so little when your mother left, I honestly don’t remember a lot about it. As I recall, Mother and Dad sat us younger children down and told us Suzy was going away for a while, we weren’t to worry, and she would come back by Christmastime. Christmas came and went, but Suzy didn’t come home. Mother again said not to worry—she’d be home soon. By the next
Christmas, she still hadn’t come, and Mother began telling people Suzy was studying to become a nurse.”

A sad smile lifted the corners of Sandra’s mouth. “I thought that was wonderful, and I told my mother I wanted to be a nurse someday, too. Isn’t that what little girls do—try to emulate the ones they admire? Then, of course, we were told Suzy was working in a church-run hospital and was too busy to come home. And I finally stopped asking about her because every time I did, Mother would be so sad. And grumpy.”

Sandra’s image blurred as Alexa gazed through a mist of tears. Mom had given up a lot to keep Alexa, but the rest of the family had given up something, too—their daughter and sister. The realization made her all the more determined to bring everyone together.

“Of course,” Sandra’s tone held a hint of melancholy, “now I understand why Suzy left and why she didn’t come back. So to answer your original question, she probably didn’t receive approval from the deacons to go for training. However, she obviously found her calling even without their approval, and just as I did when I was a six-year-old, I think it’s wonderful that my big sister is a nurse.”

Alexa blinked away her tears. “Me, too.”

“I also think it’s wonderful to have a niece so close to me in age. I only wish—” Sandra captured Alexa in an impulsive hug, nearly squeezing the breath from her lungs. “Never mind. You’re here now, and that’s all that matters.” She pulled back and smiled brightly. “Let’s go ask Derek about your idea to surprise Mother, okay? Then we’d better head back in before Mother and Suzy wonder what happened to us.”

Derek seemed reserved about hiring a paint crew, but he promised to talk to Clete and Harper and possibly the deacons if Clete thought it necessary. He said they’d give Alexa an answer as quickly as possible.

While she waited for the men to make a decision, Alexa kept herself busy. On Tuesday she took the telephone directory and her mother’s old-fashioned flip phone to the summer kitchen and called every paint crew in both Wichita
and Pratt and even some of the smaller surrounding cities. As Mr. Aldrich had speculated, most of them were already booked and couldn’t commit to a “maybe” job, but two expressed interest and one offered to drive out, look the house over, and give her an estimate. Although Alexa wasn’t sure what would happen, she decided an estimate was a good idea, and she asked him to meet her on Thursday morning when Mom would take Grandmother to a doctor’s appointment in Wichita.

She handwrote invitations to Grandmother’s surprise sixtieth birthday party and hid them away in the drawer of the summer kitchen cupboard. She planned the menu and made a list of grocery items as well as décor items so she could make the dining room as festive as possible. The house needed some cheer, and Alexa intended to make the place pulsate with color and life both inside and out.

Shelley brought supper Tuesday evening, and Alexa came close to taking Harper aside and asking if he, Clete, and Derek had come to any conclusions concerning the house. But fear of Shelley overhearing and adding her opinion, which Alexa was certain would be negative, kept her quiet. He made no effort to speak to her privately, either, so she could only surmise the men were still contemplating whether or not she could, or
should
, do it.

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