When A Thug Loves A Woman (10 page)

I read over the two pieces of mail in my hand, trying not to get pissed off. Bitches must want me to act a fool because that's the only outcome for the shit I’d just read. Aamil's ass want me to do a paternity test for her two-month-old son Ca’Mir and China's simple ass petitioned for me to be put on child support.
These bitches done lost they mind.

The fact that Aamil even went as far as naming her son after me had me baffled. When she showed me his little ass in that car seat, my heart dropped at the fact that he looked so much like my daughter who just so happens to look like me. It was crazy how Choc wanted me to explain how the same bitch she saw with Kendal was saying I was her son’s father. I didn't know what to tell her, so therefore I didn't say shit.

Just thinking about Choc made me miss her little ass. Ever since China popped up with her antics, things between us had been a little shaky. She had stopped sleeping over my house and her and Majesty went back to her house. I’m not gonna lie, I was mad as hell because this house was empty and boring as fuck without them. Especially now that we’d gotten Majesty to come out of her shell.

Pulling out my phone, I saw that she had a few minutes before she went on break at her job so I sent her a quick text.

Me
:
I miss you ma

Almost immediately, she text me back.

Choc
:
Sure, tell me anything lol

Me
:
I do. Can you and Majesty come home tonight?

Choc
:
We can come visit but our home is somewhere else, unless you forgot

I just knew she was going to text back something smart because she wouldn't be her if she didn't get smart with a muthafucka.

Me
:
Y'all home is where the fuck I say it is and that's home with me but aye…send me something real quick

It took her a while to text me back so I knew she was whipping up another smart ass reply. I was shocked as fucked when a few minutes later, my phone vibrated with three incoming text that were all pictures Choc sent me of her sexy ass.

“Get the fuck outta here!” I yelled as I dialed her number.

“Hey, bae,” she said, answering the phone laughing.

“Don't ‘hey, bae’ me. What the fuck you doing girl?”

“Whaaaat? I was just doing what you told me to do. Don't ask for it if you can't handle it, Boss Man,” she said.

“Okay, smart ass. How about we see if you can handle this dick when I'm deep in your guts when you get home. I'm trying to be nice and play by your rules, Choc, but you're not playing fair,” I told her.

I was trying to respect the fact that Choc wasn't ready to take our relationship to that level yet but the shit she did fucked with my head. I low-key thought that she got a kick out of this shit because she always thought the shit is funny.

“Casino, stooop!” she continued to laugh like I was a joke.

Beep

“Hold on, baby. My mama calling me on the other line,” I said before clicking over. “What's—”

“CASIMIRRRRRRRR! THEY SHOT HIM, THEY SHOT MY BABYYYYY!” my mama screamed into the phone.

“Whoa, hold on, ma. Calm down and tell me what's going on,” I told her, not understanding exactly what she was trying to tell me.

“I just got a call telling…telling me to come into Ford. Somebody…somebody shot…they shot Canaan. Nooo! Not my baby!” she cried into the phone.

It was as if time stood still as my mama's words finally registered in my head. Somebody had shot my big brother.

“Shit!” I yelled as I jumped up. “Where are you now, mom?”

“I'm on my way to the hospital,” she said.

“Alright, mama, you have to calm down. Don't forget you have Majesty with you and it's not good for y'all to be on the road with you driving and you're all hysterical,” I reminded her.

“You're right, just…just let me calm down,” she said as she took a deep breath.

“Good, now I'll meet you at the hospital. I'm on my way now,” I told her before hanging up.

I wasn't sure what happened and at this point, I really didn't care. All I knew was that somebody was going to have to answer to me for my brother being laid up in a fucking hospital.

-$-

I didn't even give Grizzly time to come to a complete stop before I was jumping out the truck. I needed answers and I didn't have time to waste. When I walked into the emergency room, I rushed over to my mom.

“Sino!” Majesty yelled as she jumped off her lap and rushed over to me.

It amazed me how a few weeks ago, you couldn't get Majesty to come within fifty feet of me but now, whenever we were around each other, we were the best of friends. Seeing her made me miss Casiyah something terrible because once again, her mama was on that bullshit and keeping her away from me.

As soon as Majesty wrapped her arms around me, it made me forget about all the fucked up shit that was going on. Even if it was momentarily.
The joys of a child
.

“What's up, little mama?” I kissed her cheek.

“Nana sad,” she pouted.

My mama didn't want Majesty feeling different from Casiyah and Caner, so she’d told her to call her Nana because she looked at her as her granddaughter regardless.

“Well, let's go see if we can make her better,” I said as we walked over and sat next to my mama. “How you doing, ma? What they saying?”

“I'm okay besides the fact that they got me playing the damn waiting game. I don't like this, it's making me too antsy,” she said.

“Adrina!”

Before I could say anything, I looked up to see my dad coming my way. I got up and moved a seat over so they could sit next to each other. I knew that no matter what they'd been through and how much time they'd spent apart from each other, the two of them still had mad love for each other. My mom told him the same thing she just told him and my dad sighed.

“Thank you for coming, Cassius,” she told him.

“Stop it, he's my son.”

Grizzly did his notorious tap and point to let me know that Choc had made it. She was looking around for us, so I got up with Majesty in my arms to get her. She smiled a sad smile when she saw us.

“Hey, how is he?” she asked before giving me a kiss.

“We don't know yet, he's still in surgery.”

“Okay. You want me to take her home? I can—”

“Negative, let's go,” I told her as I grabbed her hand.

Choc hugged my mom and spoke to Grizzly before sitting next to me. She grabbed my hand and did that little thing she liked to do that keeps me calm and I laid my head back and closed my eyes. This shit was so crazy to me. Canaan had only been out of prison for a little over two months and this shit happens.

He had been laying low, staying out the way, taking care of his son, and stacking his paper so I didn’t understand who would want to do this to him. I mean, I had a person in mind but I highly doubt he would do it. Kendal has no reason to go after Canaan whatsoever. Any beef that Kendal had would be directed at me and he would come after me before he touched Can Man.

“Family of Canaan Jordan?”

Choc took Majesty from me so I could go hear what the doctor said.

“Mr. Jordan is definitely a tough guy and one hell of a fighter. He took five bullets to the torso but we were able to remove all of them. He lost a substantial amount of blood which required him to have a transfusion. Since his body was open for a good amount of time, we put him in a medically induced coma so he can heal properly,” the doctor explained to us.

It was like a big weight was lifted off my shoulders to know that my brother was going to make it. I always thought he was the strongest and toughest nigga I knew but this situation here further confirmed it. Now that I knew that he was okay, I could hit the streets and find out who the fuck I was sending to their mama in a cardboard box.

It has been a total of two weeks since I'd seen Casino. That day he walked out of the hospital when Canaan got shot was the last time I saw him. He'd been so busy ripping and running the streets that he hadn't had time to sit still to check on me or Majesty. Instead, he has Grizzly drop money off for us and sending messages through him.

Knock, knock

“T, door,” Majesty told me as she ran into the kitchen.

“I hear it, baby, here I come.” I walked in the living room and stood in front of the door with my arms folded. “Who is it?” I questioned, even though I already know.

“Come on, Bambi, open up. You know who it is,” Grizzly said.

“Tell Casino I said take that money and shove it up his ass. If he can't come personally see me himself then I'm done with this relationship,” I said through the door.

I didn’t know who Casino thought I was or what dumb ass females he was used to messing with but this shit was no longer going to fly with me. I let it fly at first because I was giving him room to let whatever ill feelings he had about what happened to Canaan out his system but now it was time out for the bullshit.

Grizzly didn't respond so I figured he was going to deliver my message to his friend.

“Come on, Majesty, let's eat lunch,” I told her.

“T, where Sino?” she asked me.

That's another thing. Majesty also noticed that Casino’s black ass wasn't around and that further pissed me off because she adored him. Majesty nor anyone else knew who her father was so he was the closest thing she'd ever had to one and I didn’t appreciate the fact that he was playing with her emotions like that.

“Casino is taking care of something, baby.”

“Him come back?” she asked.

“Yes, he's coming back,” I said as I placed her lunch in front of her.

As soon as I was about to sit down and eat, my phone started ringing. I took it out my pocket and rejected Casino’s call, sending him straight to voicemail. Before I could sit it on the table, he was calling me back. Just like the last time, I rejected it and let his ass talk to the lady on my voicemail.

“T, juice.”

“After you eat your food, little lady,” I told her.

Majesty had a habit of drinking all her juice then not wanting to eat her food. I remember when she first got here, she was so hungry and frail that I couldn't stop her from eating and she never got full. It was safe to say that my baby had come a long way.

Since Majesty had been with me, she really brought a bright spot to my life. With her being around, I looked at things differently and with a better perspective than I did before.

“I done, juice,” she said, showing me her plate.

“Yes, you can get some juice now,” I said, getting up.

When I reached the kitchen, I heard the locks turning before the front door closed. Casino cut around the corner and immediately Majesty took off for him and jumped in his arms.

“What up, little mama?” he said, kissing her cheeks.

“I eat lunch,” she told him with a smile a mile long.

“Did you? I hope you saved me some.”

Majesty shook her head. “Me and T ate it all. You was gone,” she told him.

“Aw dang. Well, how about you go get ready so we can get some ice cream?”

“Yayyy!” she yelled as she took off for the stairs.

The evil look that I had been wearing since he came into my sight never left my face as he came in my direction. He was smiling but I didn't know what for because I was two seconds away from cutting his ass.

“Why you ain't answer your phone?” he asked as he walked up on me.

I tried to walk away but he placed his hands on the counter, trapping me place.

“Move, Casimir!” I said as I tried to shove him away but he didn't budge.

“You mad at me?”

He used his finger to trace the hem of my leggings before moving his finger down and tracing the outline of my pussy. I slapped his hand away and that's when he grabbed my face, pushing my head back and forcing a kiss on my lips. I tried to protest and that's when he slipped his tongue in my mouth. Against my will, a small moan escaped my mouth.

I was so into the kiss that I hadn't realized Casino had slipped his hand inside my leggings and pushed my thong to the side until I felt his finger inside me. He moved his finger as if he was beckoning me to come to him and it was making me weak. I had to grab onto the counter to keep from falling because my knees were going weak.

Right when we heard the sound of little feet approaching, I came. Casino removed his hand and stepped back.

“T, you wetty?” Majesty asked excitedly as she ran into the kitchen.

“She definitely is,” Casino mumbled with a smirk as his nasty ass stuck his finger in his mouth.

“One minute, baby. I have to do something real quick,” I said as I cut my eyes at him.

Casino laughed at me as I ran out of the kitchen but I ignored his stupid ass as I went to change my panties so we could go get my baby some ice cream.

I hoped Casino didn't think that little stunt got him off the hook. He still had some explaining to do.

-$-

After taking Majesty to get her ice cream, Casino had to stop by his traps to pick up some money. I wasn't too comfortable with this nigga taking me and Majesty with him but I let it rock since she was in the backseat knocked out and he promised it wouldn't be long. We had just pulled up to the last house on Dexter when Casino jumped out.

I sighed and laid my head back on the seat as I looked around at all the activity that was taking place on the street. This reminded me of the life I used to live so long ago when I was with my ex, Blue. Nobody couldn't tell me that I wasn't going to marry that man and have his babies. I swore I was the Bonnie to his Clyde. Wherever Blue was, I had to be just to make sure I had his back.

As much as I loved Blue, my parents hated him. He didn't fit their criteria of what they thought a perfect example of a boyfriend was. He was thuggish, ruggish, four years older than me and sold drugs. Still, I saw no wrong in Blue. He was my first love as well as my first heartbreak. I'll never forget the day I lost him to the system.

I was sleeping good in his apartment that he had in Highland Park. I was actually supposed to be in school but I'd much rather be with him than sitting in a boring ass class room.

“Bam Bam,” he shook me. “Bam Bam, come on, baby, wake up,” he said, placing kisses down my naked back.

“Nooo, Noah. I’m tired, we just went three rounds. Can you let me rest, please?” I whined as he continued to try to wake me up.

“This is real shit, Bambi. I need to talk to you,” he said as he peeled the covers from my body.

Immediately, I sat up and gave him my full attention. I knew it had to be serious for him to call me Bambi because he always called me Bam Bam. He handed me my clothes that were previously thrown around his bedroom before coming to sit on the edge of his bed.

“Wh…what’s wrong?” I asked nervously.

“Bambi, Imma be going away for a while. These pigs are trying to get me on some serious shit and I might not be able to beat it,” he said.

I looked at Blue like he was speaking a foreign language. He was talking in code and I definitely wasn't following him. I needed him to stop beating around the bush and keep it real with me.

“What are you talking about, Blue? What are the police trying to get you on?” I questioned as I got dressed.

“Murder,” he said like it was no big deal.

“Murder?” I screeched. “Baby, that's crazy you didn't murder anybody! It's gotta be some type of mix-up. How…”

I stopped when I noticed he did that little thing with his thumbs that he did whenever he was guilty of something. He looked up at me and the guilt was written all over his face.

“Bam Bam, look—”

“WHAT DID YOU DO?! WHAT DID YOU DO?!” I screamed as I attacked him. “Who's going to protect me? Who's going to have my back? Who am I going to run to now? I hate you, I fucking hate you!” I yelled as I swung not caring where my fists landed.

To say that I was hurt would be an understatement. Blue was more than just my boyfriend, he was my best friend, my protector. I didn't have friends and was always being made fun of or talked about because of my skin tone. Blue was the first person to ever make me feel comfortable in my skin and help me love myself.

“Bam Bam, stop! Chill out, alright!” Blue said as he shook me. “I know I fucked up, I know that but don't make this shit harder for me than it already is. Don't you dare sit up here and fucking say you hate me. That shit ain't cool, Bambi.”

“You promised, Noah. You promised you would always be there for me. What am I going to do without you?” I cried into his chest.

“Damn,” he sighed deeply.

I honestly didn't know what I was going to do without Blue. We had been together since I was fourteen years old but friends since I was twelve. In the year that we had been dating, I had never gone a day without seeing or talking to him and now here he was talking about he could be going away for a long time. How do you deal with that?

That day at Blue’s house was the last time I saw him. For a month straight I was worried and stressed out about him, so stressed that I lost our child that I didn't even know I was carrying. It wasn't until three months later that I found out he was locked up for life. Just like that, my best friend was taken from me.

“You ready?” Casino asked as he got in the car, putting the money in my lap.

“Ye…hold on,” I said as I took my seatbelt off and got out of the car. “Dutchess! Dutchess!”

She tried to run but I ran after her ass. She ran into the house Casino just left out of and I was daring one of them to say something to me. I grabbed her by her raggedy ass shirt and dragged her out of the house.

“Get the fuck off me!” She snatched away from me.

I had to bite my lip to keep myself to keep from slapping her ass down right here in the middle of the yard. “You need to get your shit together, Dutchess! Do you know your daughter is in that car sleep?”

Immediately, the look on her face softened at the mention of Majesty. “My baby. How is she? Can…can I see her?” she asked.

“Hell no! Not like this, you can't. You wanna see Majesty? Then get clean and stay clean. Or don't even bother coming back into her life,” I told her.

The previous look she’d had on her face had returned, “Fuck you, Bambi! You always act like you're better than me. Don't forget you're the reason I'm like this! While I'm at it, I'm keeping money in that nigga you're fucking pockets,” she yelled as she pointed at Casino who was now standing outside his car with his arms folded.

“Okay, this is where I walk away because I know that's the drugs talking and not my sister,” I said, turning to leave.

“Yea, go ahead and leave me like you always do, Bambi! Just like you thought by running away would stop him from touching you but he didn't do shit but start fucking with me!”

“Shut the fuck up, Dutchess!” I said through gritted teeth.

“Oh no, wait. That's not how the story goes, is it, Bambi?” she kept going. “I sacrificed myself and my body so that daddy would leave you alone but the moment you found a way out, you took it and said to hell with me while—”

“SHUT THE FUCK UP!” I yelled as I charged after her and hit her in the mouth.

Tears blurred my vision as me and my sister went at it like two bitches on the street. Before we could lock on each other good, somebody grabbed her as I felt my body being lifted in the air.

“Come on now, ma. That's your sister,” Casino said in disappointment as he walked me back to the car.

He was right. Dutchess was my sister regardless of anything and it wasn't until then that I had realized that I had taken things too far.

“Dutchess!” I yelled as I tried to go talk to her.

She shot me a look filled with so much hatred that it stopped me dead in my tracks.

“Let me go holla at her. You just get in the car. Little mama probably waking up by now with all that commotion,” Casino said.

I just nodded my head as I got in the car. I just watched Casino as he jogged over to Dutchess and they started talking. This was one of the reasons I didn't like getting mad, due to all my pent up anger that I keep bottled up, I always took things too far and went to the extreme. After exchanging a few words, Casino came back to the car and got in.

He looked at me and winked before pulling off.

“Everything is good and I'm not gonna ask shit that you don't want me to know until you're ready to tell me. She said she's sorry and she forgives you,” he said.

I just sighed and closed my eyes. Dutchess may not know it but she just unleashed demons from our past that I’d worked hard to bury and act like they never happened. Now I was going to have to relive those harsh memories all over again.