What the Lightning Sees: Part Two (12 page)

What the hell?

I raced over. When Jake saw me coming, he lunged toward me, took my arm and dragged me toward the exit.

“Jake, what’s going on? Are you okay? What happened?”

“Let’s get out of here,” Jake said. “Please don’t fight me on this, Haven.” His gaze was flitting around the lobby.

“I’m not fighting you, Jake. I told you that I trust you,” I said, and he looked at me, as if he were trying to confirm what I was saying.

He exhaled and grabbed my hand in his. I had to half skip to keep up with him. We crashed out of the hotel and into the Parisian rain. Jake looked left and right, then pointed toward a rank of cabs. We ran toward them just as the last one sped off.

Shit.

“Will he call the police?” I asked.

“I don’t know,” he said. The rain came heavier and Jake’s hair darkened as it clung to his face. The wet had felt dark and foreboding with Romano, but with Jake it became intimate, romantic.

“We’re getting soaked,” Jake said.

“I don’t mind,” I replied.

“You’re going to get cold and you don’t have your nine hundred scarves and twelve coats to keep you warm.” Jake smiled, then scanned the road. “Let’s head up here and try to get a cab.”

Finally, we came across another rank with a taxi waiting. I was wet to the bone, and so was Jake. When we climbed in, Jake met my eyes. Where to? “We need to dry off,” I said. I wasn’t ready to leave Paris now it was just us. Jake nodded and I could see his mind start to whirl. Before he said anything, I leaned forward. “The W, Opéra,” I said.

Jake

Jesus, it had felt good to punch that sleazebag. The adrenaline was racing through my veins. I should have done that a long time ago. I looked at my hand and stretched out my fingers. The skin hadn’t broken and everything was moving. There didn’t seem to be any physical damage. Not to me anyway.

I glanced over at Haven. I owed her an explanation, but where did I start? I didn’t want her to think I was acting like a jealous idiot. That hadn’t been it. Well it hadn’t been all of it.

And now we were on the way to the hotel under her direction. The place where I’d first got to know her body. What was she thinking? I wanted answers from her.

We pulled up outside the W and got out. Everything was enticingly familiar as we made our way across the lobby. She’d suggested a hotel and I’d not really had time to think about the implications. “I’d like a shower. I need to cool off and warm up,” I said. “Shall we get a room?”

Haven laughed. “That you do, Mr. Harrison.”

“Ugh, don’t call me that. That’s what that creep called me all day.”

She put a reassuring hand on my arm. “Sorry, come on. Let’s get a room.”

“I can get two,” I offered. Last time, we’d been here together despite our different rooms and now?

“That’s just a waste. It’s no big deal. Just get one room. We don’t need two if we’re not staying. We can shower, dry off, order room service and decompress.” I didn’t have to convince her. I was surprised, relieved and full of anticipation.

“Sounds like a plan,” I tried to keep my voice even as we approached the reception desk. I stopped myself from putting my arms around her.

“Do you want the first shower?” I asked as I closed the bedroom door behind me. Haven was standing awkwardly by the window. We were in the same layout of room we’d had when last we’d been here. The atmosphere felt thick with memories, with possibility and anticipation.

“No, you go first. I’ll check out the room service menu. Just hand me a robe and I can change out of these wet clothes,” she said.

I stepped under the water and cleansed off the stench of Romano. I hoped I hadn’t fucked it up for Haven. He might withdraw his consent to the article she was writing. I was grateful that she had come with me and abandoned him back at the Crillon. She trusted me. That had to mean something. And now here we were—it was as if we were being given a second chance.

I wrapped a towel around my waist, rubbed my hair dry with another and headed into the bedroom.

I locked eyes with Haven as soon as I opened the door. Her hair had started to break out of its bun. She looked less than her normal perfect self—she looked totally amazing.

“Feel better?” she asked, fiddling with the pins in her hair and laying them on the table.

“Yeah, much.”

Being wrapped up, most of her hair had avoided the rain. She ran her fingers through the strands and spread it across her shoulders. There she was. My Haven—soft, open, unraveling. She knew what that did to me. Was it an invitation?

She caught me looking at her. “What?” she asked in an almost whisper.

“I’ve been thinking,” I said. I watched as she scanned up and down my body, giving herself away in a look. My skin tightened under her inspection and her breath hitched. I stopped half a step away from her and brushed my knuckles down her cheek. She turned her face into my hand and I closed my eyes, overwhelmed at the feel of her and the small movement that suggested she might want me.

We stood, the gray skies of Paris as our backdrop, watching each other, waiting for what was next.

“I’m sorry,” she said softly.

My chest tightened at her vulnerability. “I should be saying that to you.”

“It’s difficult for me,” she said, turning toward the window. “Letting someone new see me. I used what I heard when you spoke to Robert as an excuse.”

“But I knew that and I should have fought harder,” I replied, cupping her face.

Her chest rose, as she shook her head. “You didn’t do anything wrong.”

I pulled her toward me and wrapped my arms around her as she slid her hands around my waist. She felt so good, so right and I became lighter, better just from touching her. I rested my cheek on her head as we stood there, holding each other, the past weeks apart just melting away.

My clothes were piled on the chair behind her and I reached to take the belt out of my jeans. She watched me, her mouth slightly parted.

“Do you remember last time in Paris?” I asked as I looped one end of the belt through the buckle and pulled, creating a small noose.

“Jake . . . ”

I shook my head. “I won’t let you keep me out anymore. I’m fighting for you and I’m going to win.”

“Jake,” she said again as if it were a final plea before she gave in and stood tentatively. The inches of air between us seemed charged with energy. They were pulling us closer together.

“You know you only tell me what you want me to do to you, and you do as I say. Did you forget?”

She looked up at me as she chewed the inside of her cheek. I brought my thumb up to her face and stroked the puckered flesh.

“Tell me you don’t want this.”

She took a deep breath, closed her eyes and presented her wrists.

Jesus, that got me hard as steel. The way she struggled, then submitted like that. As if I had real power over her, when in reality she totally owned me.

I looped the belt over her hands and she opened her eyes as I pulled the leather tight.

“I won’t hurt you,” I reassured her.

“I know,” she said. “That’s not what I’m frightened of.”

“Tell me what scares you?” I wanted her to feel completely protected.

“Myself. Wanting you. Needing you.”

My knees buckled slightly at her admission. I placed a small kiss on the corner of her lips. “I want to take that feeling away.” Using the belt, I led her over to the bed. “Lie down.”

She didn’t hesitate. She lay back and put her hands overhead. I tied the other end of the belt to the bedpost.

“Jesus, you are beautiful,” I said as I walked to her feet and drank her in from the tips of her toes to her incredible hair fanned out behind her. I luxuriated in her laid out like that. All for me.

Where should I start?
I untied her robe and crawled up the bed and lay on my side, my head propped up my hand. I watched her as she waited for me to touch her.

“Jake,” she said.

“Yes, baby?” She twisted her body toward me. “Patience,” I said as I rolled her hips back to the bed.

Haven

I was feeling anything but patient. Somewhere along the line, I’d let Jake in, but it hadn’t been today. Maybe it had been the last time we were in Paris. And now I needed him.

He swept his hands over my partially revealed body. I closed my eyes and groaned.

“Baby, you’re desperate aren’t you?”

It was embarrassing. I
was
desperate and I couldn’t hide it from him. Was it just me?

He answered my question by pulling his towel open and revealing his hardness.

“Is this what you’re desperate for?” he asked, circling his cock with his hand, dragging his fist upward.

Relief crawled up my body. He wanted me. I couldn’t take my eyes from him, and I was sure I’d suffer further embarrassment when he discovered the wetness between my legs.

“You want it?”

He didn’t need to ask. I wore the answer all over my body. I strained against the belt, but that just pushed another jolt of desire through me as the leather scuffed against my skin. Did he need me restrained? Did I need to be restrained?

He brushed my hair from my face, leaned down and ran his tongue underneath my top lip.

“You want it?” he repeated.

I nodded. “Yes,” I whispered.

“I need you to understand a couple of things first. So I’m going to explain how it’s going to be.”

I drew my eyebrows together, my breaths becoming shorter, tighter. Why was he prolonging this? I needed to feel him.

“This is not a Paris thing, Haven,” he said softly. “You won’t run from me when we get back to London.”

Initial panic gave way to relief as I realized that I didn’t want to go anywhere. I wanted him right then; I needed him, always. He began to sprinkle kisses down my neck.

“There is not, and there will never be, a reason for you to push me away. Do you hear me?”

Right then I’d say anything to get him inside me. “Yes,” I breathed. I was tired of building walls.

“I mean it. We’re together now and when we get back to London. We’re together when I go to Palo Alto, when I come back, and the week after that and the month after that. Do you hear me?”

I nodded as he scooped his fingers into my bra and found my nipple, squeezing it between his thumb and forefinger. I arched off the bed.

“This is the start, not the end, Haven,” he said.

I couldn’t bear it any longer—my words broke free. “Please, Jake.”

“We’re crazy for each other, and I’m hard as a rock for you. This is going to be a night to remember.”

He moved off the bed and dragged off my panties.

“Oh, yes, beautiful. You are so completely ready for me aren’t you?” he asked as his gaze skimmed my underwear. I couldn’t hide my desire from him.

I scrunched my eyes, embarrassed.

“Never be shy about wanting me, Haven,” he said. “I enjoy seeing the evidence. Now I want to hear it.” He rubbed his hands up my thighs, his eyes flitting from my face to between my legs. “Tell me.”

I didn’t know what to say. I was half-crazed from his touch, half-mute with shame from needing him as much as I did. If I spoke, I was afraid he’d know everything. He’d see into my soul and although it was what I wanted, I’d fought so hard for so long to keep it hidden, buried from his light.