What The Heart Finds (26 page)

“Good
morning, sweetheart,” he said, his tone warm, familiar. None of
the coolness from the day before.

“Morning,”
she mumbled back, wincing at the childish, clipped tone of her voice.

Eric's
head turned to the side slightly, noticing the tone and curious, but
saying nothing. “Thanks for dinner last night,” he said
then smiled. “I ate it cold. I figured you'd want me to suffer
a little bit.”

“A
little?” she asked, turning away from him and walking to put
the island between them.

He
chuckled. “Why didn't you eat?”

“I
lost my appetite,” she said simply, sipping her coffee.

Eric
watched her for a moment over his coffee mug. She had slipped right
back into her shields just as easily as she had slipped back into her
own clothes. Since she didn't know about her car yet, he had to
assume she was actually genuinely mad at him, not just trying to put
distance between them because she was leaving.

“Mad
at me, huh?” he asked, slightly amused at her surprised look.
Like she hadn't expected to be called out on it.

“I
never said...”

“Awe
baby,” he said, smiling. “you don't have to. There are
icicles on your tongue today.”

Lean
raised a brow, wanting to laugh at his ridiculous accusation, but not
wanting that kind of connection. “I'm not mad,” she said.
She wasn't. She genuinely wasn't. She was disappointed. In herself,
in him. Sad even. But not angry. Not at him anyway.

He
put his mug down, smirking. “Somethings got your panties in
a...”

“You
have no,” she said sharply. “effect on my panties.”

Eric
chuckled, a low sensual sound that matched the sudden heat in his
eyes. He moved toward her. “Oh no? Want to prove that right
now?” he asked, making a move to grab her.

Lena
quickly spun out of the way. “No,” she said, trying to
ignore the pulsing between her thighs that was screaming 'yes, yes,
yes'. He had been out all night, she reminded herself, probably with
another woman. She wasn't going to let herself get involved with
that.

Eric
stopped, turning away for a second and letting out a long breath. He
turned back, his face all hard lines. “Your car is done,”
he said, the words flat and professional.

Lena's
face jerked to him, her mouth falling slightly open. “What?”

“Your
car,” he said again, turning away from her. “I finished
it last night.”

“Oh,”
Lena said, a sudden surge of despondency building in her chest,
making her throat tight. “Oh,” she said again, coughing.
“Great,” she said with forced enthusiasm. “I
thought I was going to be stuck here a few more days.”

Eric
looked at her, his gray eyes looking darker. “Nope,” he
said, shaking his head and plastering a smirk on his face. “I'm
that good, baby,” he said, but it was devoid of his usual
flirtatious tone.

“Right,”
she said, smoothing a hand down her clothes.

Eric
shook his head, watching as the genuine Lena slowly started to
disappear behind the mask she wore. It had taken her so long for her
to let herself take it off in the first place. Eric felt a pang at
the idea of her hiding behind it again.

“So
you're leaving,” he observed, watching her face as she mentally
made lists of things she needed to be doing.

“What?”
she asked, looking over as if she forgot he was there. “Oh, um.
Yeah.”

“When?”
he asked, and she was too absorbed in her own plans to notice the
sweet sadness in his tone.

“As
soon as I pack,” she said, looking off toward the bedroom.

Eric
nodded, moving toward the front door. “Right,” he said in
an almost mocking tone before he ran down the steps.

Lena
went right into the bedroom, carefully folding her clothes into her
suitcase. Everything just so. Neat, meticulous. She looked over at
where she had her things haphazardly piled on the nightstand with a
shake of her head.

Once
she finished, she pulled her hair into a neat bun and grabbed her
bags, making her way through the house and ignoring the tightening
feeling in her stomach.

“Don't
worry about me. I got all of this,” she called to Eric who
watched her struggle down the stairs with her stuff.

“I
know you do,” he agreed, nodding, leaning against the passenger
side of her car.

Lena
hauled her things into the trunk and slammed it before coming back to
face Eric. “Alright. So what do I owe you?”

Eric
rubbed his chin, looking away from her. “Fifteen-hundred.”

Lena's
brows drew together. “That's just parts,” she said,
shaking her head. “You need to include labor.”

“No
baby,” he said, shaking his head. “I don't.”

“Eric...”

“Come
on, let's go to the office and square it away,” he said, moving
out of the garage quickly.

Lena
followed behind him, her heels clicking loudly against the pavement.
The inside office was old and dated looking. Dust covered the filing
cabinets and the desk was cluttered with haphazard stacks of paper.
There was a couch stretched out underneath the front window with a
pile of car and tool magazines laid across the cushions.

“Hey,”
Lena yelled, her tone accusing. Eric looked up, a brow raised.
“that's mine,” she said, pointing to the rosemary plant
on the window sill.

“Yeah
you left it in the car,” he shrugged, leaning down on the desk
and filling out some paperwork.

Lena
felt a bit of guilt that she had forgotten about it. So much for her
good track record at keeping it alive. “So you didn't think
about returning it?”

Eric
looked up from his bent down position, a strand of hair slipping over
his eye. “I decided to save it from you,” he smiled. “The
poor thing was half dead.”

“It
was not,” Lena objected, though looking at it after Eric had
taken care of it, she had to admit it looked sturdier, fuller.

“It
was starved of sunlight,” he objected, looking back down at his
paper. “Why rosemary?” he asked, stapling two pieces of
paper together.

“I
thought I would use it for cooking.”

“And
you didn't,” he finished for her.

“I
never had the time. Are you going to give it back to me?” she
asked as he made no move to hand it to her.

“Nope,”
he said, his face impassive.

“Seriously?”

“Yup,”
he said and held out the papers to her. “Those are for you to
keep. Do you want to pay with a card or a check?”

“Check
is fine,” she said, reaching into her purse and rummaging for
her checkbook. “Just make it out to you?”

“Mmhmm,”
he said, sitting on the edge of the desk and watching her write.

Lena
made the check out for two-thousand, knowing if she tried to sneak
any more past him, he would probably just refuse to cash it, but
feeling the need to pay more than parts. He had been working on her
car for days. She ripped it out of her book and held it out to him.
“Thanks Eric.”

Eric
took it, stashing it underneath a pile of papers on the desk without
looking at it, then standing up. “So I guess that's it.”

Lena
nodded, moving toward the door. She walked back to her car, her back
pin-straight, Eric walking lazily behind her. How was this supposed
to go? Was she supposed to hug him? Kiss him? Offer a handshake? Just
wave and get in her car? She walked up to the driver's side door and
opened it, turning back to him, at a complete loss of what to say.

Eric
moved his hands into his front pockets, making his shoulders hunch
slightly forward, making him look younger. He nodded at her. “It
was nice knowing you, Lena Edwards.”

Lena
felt the words twist in her belly and she nodded stiffly at him,
moving to get into her car. “Goodbye Eric,” she said,
slamming the door, and pulling out of the station as fast as
possible.

She
forced herself to keep her eyes on the road in front of her, to not
look in the rear-view. To not think about him. To not let herself
feel the things she was keeping crushed down deep inside.

She
was about half an hour out of town, finally moving on to a highway,
when she first heard it. A dull, insistent clicking noise. Lena
reached and turned off the radio, listening for it. And then there it
was again, louder. She pulled the car off onto the shoulder, looking
around for something on the floorboard or in the side panels on the
door. But there was nothing. She opened the center consul, reaching
around and pulling it out.

The
bright red rock she had found in the stream with Eric the night of
the bachelor auction. She had forgotten all about it. She had thrown
it to him and asked him to keep it for her. And he had. And he had
given it back to her.

Lena
looked down at it, its smooth surface, and felt the tears fill her
eyes. She closed her fist around it, hanging her head for a hopeless
moment. Her body shook violently as she fought against the sobs. It
was stupid. Silly. Pathetically weak of her to be crying over someone
she had just had a short little fling with. They had only slept
together a few times for goodness sakes.

She
wasn't going to be that girl. The girl who fancied herself having
feelings for someone just because they had sex. It was beneath her.

Lena
swatted at the tears on her cheeks, sniffling as she took deep
breaths. She reached into her purse, burying the rock into a pocket
inside, then turned the radio back up and kept driving.

She
had a life to get back to. A life, as it turned out, that was going
to be better than the life she had left before. She was finally
moving up in her company. She would be able to prove her worth. Take
more control. Earn more money. Get out of her tiny apartment and move
into a nicer neighborhood. She would have everything she had wanted
for years.

She
was getting everything.

A
low, nagging voice pulled in the back of her mind, quiet but there.

Yes,
she was getting everything she wanted.

Except
Eric.

--

Eric
watched her drive away, her car pulling out of town, leaving nothing
but her memory behind. He reached into his toolbox, grabbing a heavy
wrench and throwing it violently against the wall.

He
should have said something. He should have hugged her. Or kissed her.
He should have worked himself under those walls and taken her to bed
again. Taken her slowly, full of all the longing and need he had been
feeling since the night before.

He
had hauled through the woods, panting and sweaty until he got to the
stream. He sat down on the down tree and watched the water.

He
wasn't the kind of man who needed to take time and think. He wasn't
introspective. He was always impulsive and reckless. He always knew
what he wanted from one moment to the next.

And
yet there he was, his brain full of unfinished thoughts, barely
recognized feelings he didn't want to have to face. All because of
her. Who would have thought that some random businesswoman from the
city would be the one to drive him to distraction?

Even
with Anna... he had known. He had known he cared for her. He had
known he wanted her in all the ways possible. It had been foreign,
but easy. There hadn't been any denial or doubt or fear.

Then
there was Lena. Lena and her mercurial hazel eyes, just as often
shooting daggers at him as smiling, her soft white-blonde hair, and
her serious face. And, of course, her responsive body. Her shameless
need. Her overwhelming response to his touch.

He
had experienced more than his fair share of women over the years, all
pleasant in all their varied ways. Some who liked things very soft
and warm and vanilla. Some who liked to drag out whips and nipple
clamps and have him punish them. Some who just needed to fuck their
cares away.

Yet
not one of those women compared. They, in fact, paled in comparison.
Lena had undoubtedly been the best, most satisfying sex of his life.
As soon as he was done with her, he wanted more. He had been in a
constant state of arousal since the first time he had laid hands on
her.

But
that aside, it wasn't all about sex for him. He didn't just want to
get some and move on to the next. He found himself looking forward to
talking to her, getting beneath her defenses and having her open up
to him. Find out what drives her. What she feared more than anything
else.

He
wanted to know stupid little things. Like her favorite song. When she
got her first kiss. Why she always wore her hair up in a bun. And why
her go-to response was snark. If she swatted spiders with the
newspaper or caught them in cups and moved them outside. He wanted to
know all the little somethings that make up everything.

He
wanted to come home to her in his kitchen, dancing around in his old
t-shirts and baking her crazy little recipes, her entire body
vibrating with some deep rooted internal pleasure. And then he wanted
to kiss her until her toes tingled and take her to bed and get lost
in each other until the sun came up.