What Once Was One (Book 2) (34 page)

I heard my former master’s voice in my head, telling me to get my emotions under control. He had taught me better than this.

I focused on the water in front of me. Trying to clear my head, I forced all my turbulent emotions into the spell I crafted. All the rage, pain, frustration, and longing went into that bubble. It rose into the air and ballooned with the emotions leaving me.

“You
are
a wizard,” an awed voice said. “I had my doubts.”

The bubble popped and I froze. I knew that voice. Part of me wanted to turn around, the other half was scared to.

“Hello, Kathleen,” I said. I tried to stare at the black water, but her presence was too distracting.

The grass crunched underneath her feet as she stepped closer. She stood inches from my back. Her smell was intoxicating. It had always reminded me of fresh flowers after a morning’s rain shower.

“I thought I saw you earlier. You did a terrible job at hiding yourself,” she said. “No matter how many years it’s been, I would recognize you anywhere, Hellsfire. Once I knew you were in town, it was only a matter of time before you came here.”

I took a breath and readied myself for what was about to come, and for what should have been resolved years ago.

I turned around and faced her. We were a foot apart, but I didn’t look directly at her. She didn’t make a move or say anything. She waited for me to finish looking her over. I stared at her feet, then worked my way upward. She had gained a little weight from the pregnancy, but it enhanced her short, curvy body.

Kathleen’s long, wavy, dark brown swirled around her. When she saw me gawking, her full lips smiled. She was just as beautiful now as she was back then. I was tempted to embrace her, but held back.

“I hear you’re the Hero of Alexandria and a wizard now,” Kathleen said when our eyes finally met. “I always knew you’d do something great.” She brushed her hand across my arm.

I cleared my throat and said, “Thank you. I saw Dorian. He told me you have a daughter.” I took a deep breath and my voice became icy. “And that you married Nathan.”

Her hand fell from my arm and hung at her side. She looked down and nodded.

“Why?”

She glared at me with fire in her eyes. “He’s a good man, Hellsfire. He loves me and he’s there for me and our daughter.”

I scoffed. “Good man? Have you forgotten how he used to treat me?”

“I remember.”

“Then how could you be with him?”

“I don’t need to explain myself to anyone, least of all you. You left me, Hellsfire. Me! I didn’t leave you.” Tears hovered in the corners of her eyes. “Yes, I started seeing Nathan to get back at you for how badly you hurt me, but I soon found myself liking him. And eventually, I fell in love with him.”

I stared at her, whatever illusions I may have clung to vanishing. Kathleen and I could never be together again. There was nothing left for me here. There was no one I could turn to. People here couldn’t understand my powers or black flames, my situation with Krystal or in Alexandria, and those in Alexandria could never understand my simple upbringing.

Kathleen quickly turned away from me. A quiet tension brewed in the air. The fireflies left the area and the crickets stopped. “You left me. Why do I matter to you now?”

Her words were like an ogre’s maul to the chest. I staggered backwards, wondering how she could think such a thing. She was my first love. She would
always
matter to me, no matter what paths the gods laid out for us.

I reached out to her, and she weakly shrugged her shoulders. I clamped down and spun her around to face me. Quiet tears rolled down her face. She scowled as I struggled for words.

The anger lifted from her face. “Please,” she said in a soft voice. I knew what she wanted—the truth.

“You were
better
than me, Kat.” My eyes burned with pain and tears. “I couldn’t get anything right and I had no idea what to do with my life. I didn’t want to be stuck in this town, shoveling horse manure and plucking feathers. I wanted to escape and be something more. I always dreamed of people knowing my name and not believing it was evil.”

Kathleen narrowed her almond eyes at me. Her whole body trembled with rage. “You selfish bastard! How could you think only of yourself? Why didn’t you tell me of these things, or how you felt?”

Kathleen’s fist flew up. I could have stopped it, but I deserved it. It struck like stone, and it had nothing to do with her physical strength. Her anger and pain caused the most damage. Her punched sheared through my body to my soul, tearing at my spirit. It took every bit of will to keep from falling over. It was second only to what I had done to Krystal.

Kathleen pounded on my chest. I stood there watching, feeling her energy burn into me with each and every hit. My mind and spirit reeled, but I stood strong. I had to, for Kat’s sake. She had to get it all out. Afterwards, she collapsed against my bruised, sore chest, sobbing.

“How could you?” Kathleen asked. “You promised you would always be there for me. You lied!”

I cradled her and held her against my chest. She fit snugly under my chin like she always had. “It’s all right. I’m here for you now.”

She looked up at me, her face wet and red like mine. We stared into each other’s eyes. My tears fell upon her sensual face, but she didn’t care. Our faces were pulled together by a long-forgotten force.

In an ever-increasing movement, our lips drew forward. Her breath came upon me and our hearts beat deep with anticipation. When we kissed, every sensation was wrapped into one. It hit me hard, taking over every feeling and thought. The floodgates were opened, and we kissed each other harder, as if desperate for breath. Old and powerful emotions rushed back, flowing as if a dam had broken. Pure euphoria surged between us. She broke the long kiss and left me standing there, yet my body ached for her to go on.

We gasped for breath. There are some magics in the world that cannot be understood or overcome. That was one of them. Kathleen flashed me a smile I had seen a thousand times before, and her eyes gleamed with hunger. She wanted me to take her right then, like I used to. My loins were on fire. It had been so long, and I needed the release. She motioned with her eyes to a clearing with soft grass.

I grabbed her hands and stopped her from tugging on my clothes. I fixed my robes and said, “I…I can’t.” I barely got the words out.

Kathleen stared at me in quiet fascination. That startled me. I had never seen her take rejection well. She
always
got what she wanted. She made sure of that. It was one of the things I loved most about her.

“There’s someone else, isn’t there?” she asked.

I nodded.

“Who?”

I hesitated to tell her, but she deserved the truth. “The Princess of Alexandria.”

“Ah, so there’s more to the stories. I thought so.” It didn’t seem to bother her; she grinned like a cat. Kat ran her finger over my chest and headed towards my waist. I stopped her, but only barely. “How come you’re here with me instead of with her?”

I shook my head. “I needed to clear my head a bit. Things aren’t…right with us.”

Kathleen cocked her head. “Are you two fighting? If you are, you need to apologize. You were always a bit too prideful. One of the things I loved and hated about you.”

“No, nothing like that.” I licked my dry lips. “She’s been afflicted with a magical curse. If I touch her, she’ll die.”

Kat’s almond eyes searched mine. “Oh, Hellsfire. I’m so sorry.” She reached up and pulled my head to her shoulder, and she cradled me.

“You must care about the princess a lot,” Kat said into my ear.

“I do.”

“Then I’m sure you’ll find a cure. You’re nothing if not persistent.”

“I wish I could have been there for you, Kat.” My hand reached out to her serene face. I stroked my thumb back and forth. She put her hand up, clasped my own, and moaned like old times. “But I’ll be here for you now. Anything you need, let me know. I’ll come running. Promise.”

She giggled. “Even though you were fast, you were a bit clumsy at times. Hmmm, but you are stronger now.” Kat ran her hand under my wizard’s robes, making contact with my skin. I moaned as her fingers explored my hardened body. She gave me another tantalizing smile.

I forced myself to take her hand out from under my clothes. I took her hand in mine and intertwined our fingers. “I don’t know your daughter’s name.”

“Hope.”

I smiled. “You should always have hope.”

Kat grinned. “If you’re a wizard, anything’s possible.”

I reached out with my hand and put it to her face again. We kissed one last time, but it wasn’t like it was before. It was good, and desire and passion lurked, but the emotions that were in our first kiss weren’t there. Love was there, and it always would be. We finally had the closure we’d both missed.

I broke the kiss. She eventually opened her eyes and fixed them on mine. “You must really care for this princess of yours,” Kat said. “More than you ever did for me. Usually I would have to break it.” She reached up and kissed me on the corner of my mouth. “Take care of yourself, Hellsfire. There aren’t many wizards around these days.”

“I will. Goodbye, Kat. Next time I’m in town I’ll make sure to drop by to see you and your daughter.”

She smiled, turned around, and left. I could have been a gentleman and walked her home, but I knew she’d make it back just fine and that she wouldn’t want my help.

I walked back home, and I couldn’t help but compare Kathleen and Krystal. It wasn’t fair of me, but I did it anyway. Kathleen was right. I did care about Krystal more than I ever did about Kat, but it was hard. Her father, the banishment, the people of Alexandria, the curse, all moved to work against us. I wanted to tell Krystal how I felt, but with what had happened between us, I wasn’t sure if I ever could, or if I should. It would make things harder on her.

Instead of being absorbed in my thoughts, I should have paid attention to my surroundings, especially after what Kat had said. If she knew I was in town, there were bound to be others. Others who weren’t like Kat or Dorian. Others who wanted a taste of my blood.

----

Two men stepped out of the woods and blocked my path. I glanced behind me to see two more men.

These weren’t mercenaries. Three of the four men carried a pitchfork, a hoe, and a shovel. Only one man brandished a sword. He stepped forward and the moonlight illuminated him. I gasped when I saw his face. There was a burn scar on the left side—a scar I had burned into him.

“Nathan,” I said.

“Hellsfire,” he said, narrowing his eyes.

We stared each other down for one long minute. Neither of us said anything. Nathan’s three friends shifted uncomfortably, as years of past anger vented from the pair of us.

“What do you want, Nathan?” I asked, breaking the silence. “I have no time for games.”

He pointed his sword at me. “Just you.” He reached up with his free hand, tracing the bumps and scars over his left cheek. “
You
did this to me.”

“I warned you, and if you don’t leave now, I’ll do worse.” I glared at his cronies. “You’ve heard the stories about me. They’re all true. I’m a wizard now. I don’t want to hurt you.”

They glanced at each other, then to Nathan. They lowered their weapons.

“Don’t be fools!” Nathan said. “This is Hellsfire. He’s not a wizard, but some kind of demon. We’ve beaten him before.”

They regained their courage and raised their farming tools. The pair behind me stepped forward. I let the fire flow to my eyes.