We'll Meet Again (23 page)

Strolling home behind the Germans in a straggling procession with neither side acknowledging the presence of the other, Meg was struck once again by the incongruity of it all. When they reached the comparative warmth of the manor house, Hauptmann Dressler and Major Jaeger took the
officers into the drawing room and Meg settled her father in a chair by the meagre fire in his study.

‘Are you all right, Pa?’

He smiled weakly. ‘I’d love a brandy, my dear, but as that is out of the question do you think I could have a hot drink?’

‘Of course.’ Meg dropped a kiss on his forehead and tucked a blanket around his knees. ‘I’ll be as quick as I can, Pa.’

In the kitchen she found Marie and Simone standing at the table staring at a basket filled with food.

‘Where on earth did that come from?’ Meg touched the handle gingerly, half expecting it to be a mirage brought about by hunger.

Marie eyed it warily. ‘It might be a German trick. I don’t want to touch it and then find myself shot for pilfering their rations.’

‘I never did believe in Santa Claus,’ Simone said, sniffing. ‘But I could eat the lot and still be hungry.’

Meg unpacked the basket, laying the items on the table one by one. ‘I haven’t seen this much food since the war started. Chicken, ham, apples, cheese, wine – we’ll have a feast.’

‘You’re sure it’s all right then?’ Marie asked anxiously.

‘Perhaps it’s a Christmas present from Hauptmann Dressler,’ Meg said, chuckling. ‘Don’t ask – just cook it. I’ll take the blame if it turns out to be a gift for Major Jaeger from an admirer.’

Simone seized the plucked chicken by its neck. ‘Come on, Mum. Meg’s right for once. We’ll have the best meal we’ve ever had, even if they put us against the wall and shoot us for it.’

Marie held the chicken at arm’s length, as if it might at any moment explode. ‘If you’re sure …’

‘I am,’ Meg said firmly. ‘And I’m going right now to tell Pa that tonight we’ll have a proper Christmas dinner.’

Meg burst into the study and froze in surprise when she saw Rayner sitting in a leather armchair by the fire, looking relaxed and at ease.

Charles turned to her with a delighted smile transforming his worn features. ‘Meg, Captain Weiss has just informed me that he knew David in Oxford. Why didn’t you tell me?’

She hesitated, trying to think of an adequate explanation when really there was none.

‘That was my fault, sir,’ Rayner said hastily. ‘I thought it would be safest if no one knew, apart from Meg of course.’

The ease with which he came up with such a glib answer only added to Meg’s discomfort. ‘So what has changed suddenly?’

‘Meg!’ Charles stared at her over the top of his reading glasses. ‘That was very rude of you.’

‘I’m sorry.’ Meg met Rayner’s gaze with a frown. She could see a dangerous situation evolving both for her family and for Rayner should Dressler discover their friendship. ‘I don’t think that the
Hauptmann would approve of your fraternising with any of us. Whatever we might wish to believe, you can’t alter the fact that we’re on opposite sides.’

Charles shook his head. ‘My dear, we are all caught up in something that we haven’t the power to change.’ He began to cough uncontrollably.

Meg filled a glass with water from a carafe on the desk, and held it to his lips. ‘You’d better go,’ she said, casting a worried look in Rayner’s direction. ‘My father isn’t well.’

‘We’ll talk again,’ Charles murmured breathlessly.

Rayner rose from his seat. ‘I can’t acknowledge you in front of my fellow officers, sir; I’m sure you appreciate that. But I’ll try to make your lives a little easier if I can.’

As they shook hands, Charles managed a weak smile. ‘Thank you, Captain. I feel much happier knowing that there is someone looking out for my family.’

Rayner smiled. ‘Goodnight, sir.’

Meg followed him out into the deserted entrance hall. ‘That wasn’t very wise, was it?’

He took her hand in his, but his expression was grave. ‘This war is going to drag on longer than anyone ever thought. I respect your father and I wanted him to know that he has one ally in the house.’

‘And the basket of food – was that from you? Did you steal it from the quartermaster’s stores? I certainly hope you didn’t do anything so risky.’

‘No. I bought it with my own money. I can’t bear to see you and your family suffer. You must allow me to help in any way I can.’

The warmth in his eyes elicited a reluctant smile from Meg. ‘It doesn’t go with the uniform, Captain.’

‘The man beneath it is the same. I haven’t changed since we first met in Oxford.’

‘Are you saying that I have?’

He put his head on one side, his lips twitched and his eyes teased. ‘You used to laugh more often.’

She had done her best to convince herself that he was her enemy, but just as she felt the last of her defences crumbling a burst of raucous laughter emanating from the drawing room brought her back to reality. ‘You Germans have every reason to laugh. We have none.’

‘We celebrate Christmas too,’ he said gently. ‘Can’t we be friends again, if only for today?’

‘We have to keep up the fiction that we’re on different sides.’ She laid her hand on his arm. ‘It’s not what I want, Rayner, but it’s dangerous for you as well as for us.’

His smile warmed her heart. ‘Does that mean you will wear my gift of river pearls, Marguerite?’

She took the box from her skirt pocket and opened it. ‘It’s beautiful, but I thought that all the jewellers’ shops on the island had been looted. How did you come by it?’

‘Look at the name inside the lid.’

‘Mabb and Sons, Jewellers and Silversmiths, High
Street – Oxford?’ She shot him a questioning look. ‘Oxford?’

‘I bought it for you the day after the May Ball.

It was a little gift to make up for the trouble I caused you by suggesting that midnight drive.’

‘But you didn’t come to see me.’

‘I was going to give it to you when we met on Folly Bridge, but you never came.’

‘I didn’t get the message. David forgot to give it to me.’

‘I waited for two hours.’

‘I didn’t know that.’ She felt suddenly light-headed and confused. He was looking at her with a light in his eyes that was disturbing, and the slightly lopsided curve of his lips made her weak with desire.

‘Would you have come?’

‘I don’t know.’

‘The Meg that I knew then would have come, I’m certain of it.’

The hard shell that she had been building around her heart splintered into shards, but she was afraid to let go completely. ‘Perhaps, but I was very young. It’s probably just as well Uncle Paul sent me home and saved me from making a fool of myself.’

‘Will you wear it for me now?’ He took the pearls from her and fastened the necklace around her neck. He was standing so close to her that she could feel the warmth of his body. The achingly familiar scent of him filled her senses. The tiny pearls instantly absorbed the warmth from her flesh but she shivered
with anticipation as his hands slid down her arms. He twisted her round to face him, gazing deeply into her eyes. ‘Meg, I—’ He broke off as the doors opened and Major Jaeger strolled out of the drawing room.

Rayner dropped his hands to his sides and Meg took a step backwards, but if Major Jaeger had noticed anything he kept his thoughts to himself.

‘May I wish you and your family the compliments of the season, Miss Colivet?’

‘Thank you, Major Jaeger.’

‘Captain Weiss, you are going to join us, are you not?’

‘At once, Herr Major.’ Rayner followed him into the drawing room and Meg stood alone in the echoing hallway, her fingers caressing the necklace of river pearls that nestled so comfortably at the base of her throat.

She did not see Rayner again that day but she wore the pearls, touching them occasionally and reliving the sensation of his fingers brushing against her skin as he fastened it around her neck. She had not considered the risk of flaunting such an expensive gift until Simone drew everyone’s attention to it during dinner. Meg felt herself blushing uncontrollably as she tried to pass it off as an old piece of jewellery given to her long ago by her parents. Pa, of course, would never remember anything like that and Mother was not there to contradict her. Meg hoped that the incident had passed unnoticed but
she had seen Gerald looking at her curiously and Simone met her explanation with a cynical stare.

When the meal was over Meg was carrying a tray laden with dirty dishes to the kitchen when Simone caught up with her in the narrow passageway. ‘Don’t think you’re fooling me, Meg Colivet. I’ve seen the way you look at each other. I’m not the only Jerrybag in this house, am I?’

New Year began with a Red Cross message from Muriel, proudly announcing the birth of twin daughters to Adele and Frank. Meg was delighted at the thought of being an aunt, but it was difficult to get excited over an event that was so far removed from the drudgery and the rigours of their daily lives that it seemed almost unreal. She sat at her father’s bedside while they composed the few precious lines allotted to them for a reply, although it would, of course, be heavily censored. They sent congratulations to Adele and Frank, adding that they were all in good health and being well treated. Meg hoped that her mother would not read between the lines.

She lived in constant fear that David would break the habit of a lifetime and communicate with them, but thankfully he remained his usual unreliable self. It would have been difficult to explain to the authorities how David Colivet could be in two places at the same time, and Meg could only be grateful to her brother for being thoughtless and utterly self-centred. She could imagine him blissfully unaware of his family’s plight while he lived day to day, playing the hero, which he undoubtedly was. She
said a prayer for him every night, and hoped that he never changed.

The bitter January days dragged on and the increasing scarcity of food and fuel simplified their existence to a daily struggle for survival. Meg saw very little of Rayner and they were never alone for long enough to do more than exchange a brusque greeting. Sometimes she thought she had imagined their conversation on Christmas Day and she would fall asleep at night with the pearls around her neck, waking early to tuck the necklace safely away in its box beneath the mattress at the start of another back-breaking day.

Pip’s crystal set kept them in touch with news of the German surrender in Stalingrad and at the end of January they heard of the first daylight bombing of Berlin by the RAF, but it was becoming increasingly dangerous to use the radio and Pip was almost caught with it on several occasions.

At the beginning of February it was as if Grulich’s ghost had come to haunt them in the shape of Lieutenant Nordhausen, who had been sent as a replacement for an officer who had become ill and been repatriated to Germany. Rayner was kept busy with duties overseeing the construction of gun emplacements at Jerbourg Point, and Nordhausen seemed determined to earn his promotion by spying on the family and finding fault with everything they said or did.

One bitterly cold evening in late February, Meg had just come in from the fields where she had been helping Gerald to bring the cows into the barn. The constant threat of escaped slave workers stealing food and even milking the cows made it necessary to lock the animals in at night. It had been a long, gruelling day and she had had almost nothing to eat; she was cold, exhausted and faint from hunger.

‘Oh, it’s you.’ Simone, far advanced in her pregnancy now, waddled into the kitchen clutching a pile of empty plates. She crashed them down on the wooden draining board.

Meg was in no mood to tolerate Simone’s tantrums. ‘Just what is your problem?’

‘Oh, sorry, Miss Colivet. I forgot my place for a moment.’

Meg’s hand shook as she attempted to pour what was left of the acorn coffee into a cup and some of it slopped onto the table. ‘I wish you’d stop behaving like a spoilt brat, and grow up.’

‘What’s going on?’ Gerald stood in the scullery doorway, shrugging off his damp coat.

‘Ask Simone. I’m sick to death of her snide remarks.’

Gerald eyed his sister warily. ‘What have you been saying to Meg?’

Simone’s mouth drooped at the corners. ‘Whatever I do or say is wrong. Tell her to leave me alone.’

He tossed his coat onto a chair and went to stand
by the rapidly cooling range, warming his hands in front of the iron bars. ‘Look, I don’t understand what’s going on between you two, but we can’t fall out like this. Simone, say sorry to Meg.’

‘Like hell I will.’ She stamped out of the kitchen.

Gerald sighed. ‘What has she said this time?’

‘Your sister hates me for some reason,’ Meg said, frowning. ‘I don’t know why she’s being like this when all I’ve ever done was try to help her.’

He moved to her side and wrapped his arms around her. ‘Of course she doesn’t hate you. God knows she should be on her knees thanking you and your father for taking us all in. But Simone’s a bit too fiery for her own good. It’s all an act; she’s not a bad girl at heart.’

‘You would say that, and I do try to ignore her moods. She just caught me on the raw today.’ In spite of herself, Meg leaned her head on his shoulder. The warmth of his arms and the sympathy in his voice was comforting and welcome.

He rubbed his cheek against her damp hair. ‘One day you’ll admit you love me, Meg.’

‘You never give up, do you? You’re a stubborn fool, Gerald,’ she said, smiling.

A sudden movement in the doorway made them leap apart as Lieutenant Nordhausen strode into the room. It was impossible to tell from the set of his thin, bird-like features what he had heard or seen, but he said nothing, merely giving them a calculating look before helping himself to the remainder of the coffee.

*

Simone’s baby was born in the spring just as the daffodils and narcissi engulfed the lawn with their golden trumpets. Marie and Jane had been up all night, doing what was necessary, with Meg running errands and making tea from leaves that had been used and reused until the pale straw-coloured infusion was more like hot water than a restorative beverage. Meg had finally dozed off in an armchair by the window when the last loud moan from Simone was followed by the wailing cry of her son.