Welcome To My World (Hell Yeah!) (13 page)

“Well, uh—well, uh...”

“Don’t take it out on him, Maybelline. He had to come to my rescue. I turned my truck over when I ran off the road trying to miss a damn deer.”

Maybelline didn’t look concerned. She ignored George and poked Michael in the chest. “Is your finger broken? Couldn’t you call?”

He was about to answer, when George picked up the mantle of conversation again. “He shoulda called, but there was this nurse…”

POP! She slapped Michael hard on the jaw.

“Hey!” Michael hollered.

“Now, there weren’t no…” George began to protest.

POP!

Maybelline hit George for good measure and stalked off.

Michael turned to George. “What were you trying to do?”

“I was just trying to help.”

“Well, don’t try so hard next time.” Michael rubbed his face while George rubbed his.

“Good Lord.” Bowie laughed. What a day! He was tired from the worry and the running. Dealing with the insurance company was the worst. He checked his watch. Eight. Cassie would be home in an hour.

Cassie.

Off and on all day, something had been worrying him. He doubted if one thing had to do with the other, but he had to find out. Uncle Michael would be the one to ask. “Hey.” He put a hand on his elder’s shoulder. “Can I ask you something?”

“Sure.” Michael turned to him.

Bowie had always been able to depend on his uncle. He had been there for him through thick and thin. “I want to ask you about the accident when I was a kid. You know, we just didn’t talk about it very much. Neither Dad nor Mom would answer any of my questions. And there’s something I need to know.”

“What is it?” Michael looked him straight in the eye. “It was an accident. Not your fault and it was a long time ago.”

“I know.” Bowie nodded. “Do you remember the little girl’s name or anything about her?”

Michael let out a hard breath, then fortified himself with a swallow of beer.

Taking his reluctance to talk as bad news, Bowie questioned again. “She didn’t die later and no one told me about it.” That she had lived was all he had been told, like that was enough to absolve him of what happened.

“No, she didn’t die.” Michael shook his head. “I remember her dad, he was foreman out on the highway department. The little girl was an only child.”

“What was her name?” Bowie pressed. “Do you remember her name?” He didn’t know why he was asking, there was absolutely no reason to believe…

“I couldn’t tell you the little girl’s first name, but the last name was Cartwright.”

CHAPTER EIGHT

The little girl I shot had the last name of Cartwright.

Bowie felt like he had been kicked in the stomach.

“What’s wrong?” George asked. “You look green.”

“Bowie? What’s the matter?” Michael asked.

“I’ve gotta go.” He threw some money on the bar. “George, I’ll see you tomorrow. Uncle, I’ll call you.”

And he left.

Bowie wasn’t aware of much. He didn’t stop to speak to people who called his name or respond to women as they tried to get his attention. It couldn’t be a coincidence. He had shot Cassie.

He had shot Cassie.

Cassie was in a wheelchair because of him.

Cassie was in near constant pain because of him.

Bowie robotically walked to his truck. When he got there, he leaned on the side and threw up. People walking by assumed he was drunk. Bowie wasn’t drunk.

He was devastated.

*  *  *

Cassie got home at eight-forty-five. She hadn’t heard from Bowie, but she knew he would be along soon. Going to the medicine cabinet, she reached for some antibiotic cream. One of the dogs had scratched her in his excitement. It didn’t matter, Cassie didn’t mind. They were so thrilled to receive attention that they tended to be overly exuberant.

The same sentiment could be applied to the folks at the nursing home. Only their over-exuberance manifested itself in the form of demands to play board games or take part in sing-alongs or even a wheelchair race or two down the hallway. Cassie rarely won.

But now, she was home and ready for Bowie to come over. All day she had replayed the events of the night before and Cassie was convinced she had just been nervous. She was ready to try the deflowering process again. Being a virgin was so yesterday.

A few miles down the road, Bowie was parked on the side of the road. He was trying to get control of his emotions. There was no way he could face Cassie in the state of mind he found himself in. Climbing down the embankment, he crawled over a fence and walked to the edge of the river that ran right along the side of the road. How many times had he come here to fish or tube? Here he had been able to recapture his childhood after the tragedy of the shooting. Finding a way to sleep at night without dreaming had been an accomplishment. Yea, he had gotten over the incident.

But how had it been for Cassie?

“Fuck!” He broke off a low hanging limb of a cypress tree and flung it into the river. What in the hell was he going to do? First, he had to find out if it was true, obviously. The idea of two Cartwright girls getting shot in a gun accident was far-fetched but Bowie guessed it was possible. If it was, what in hell was he going to say? If Cassie was the little girl whose life he ruined, she deserved to know. This wasn’t something he could keep from her. Could he?

She would never want to speak to him again. That fact wasn’t even up for debate. Bowie’s heart was breaking. How could he give her up? Hell, how could he let her exist in this world, struggling, and him not do everything he could to make her life better?

For about ten minutes he sat down and stared at the water, not seeing the birds or the fish that jumped or the traffic whizzing by behind him. All he could see was Cassie’s sweet angel face and hear her cry of pain when she tried to take even one step. Struggling with his conscience, he tried to come to terms with what he had done. Essentially, he, Bowie Travis Malone, had been responsible for stealing Cassie Cartwright’s life.

What was he going to do?

How could he face her and pretend he didn’t know?

He had to, at least for now, because he couldn’t lose her. Cassie needed him and he needed Cassie.

“God, help me,” he prayed. His shoulders slumped in defeat. What could he do? And then he realized, there was only one answer. He would have to build a world for both of them, one where she would feel safe and later…later he would tell her the truth when she was so much in love with him it wouldn’t matter.

*  *  *

Cassie heard the rap on the door. Her whole body went limp with relief. He was only a half hour or so late, but she’d started imagining the worst. Throwing open the door, she met him with a smile of relief. “I was worried.”

Bowie felt a pinch in his chest. “Sorry, baby.” He leaned down to kiss her.

“If you’re hungry, I made a crockpot roast with potatoes and baby carrots.”

She looked so hopeful that he would’ve eaten again even if he had consumed three suppers. Luckily, he was starving. “Sounds wonderful.” He sat down at her table and immediately started thinking of how to proceed. First, he had to ask. “This morning, you told me you’d been in an accident. We got interrupted.”

The table was already set and she lifted the crockpot over to the table and Bowie held his breath while she did so. Lord, he needed to calm down. Cassie had been taking care of herself for some time and he needed to let her do things without him freaking out. “Oh, yea, ‘the accident’,” she said the last two words with emphasis. “You have to realize I don’t know many particulars. My folks didn’t talk about it much, other than they measured everything in life as either happening before or after the accident. All I remember is going out to play and chasing a little bird. I can remember the pain, but not much else until I woke up a few days later and I couldn’t run or jump or walk like before.”

“Do you know who…?” He held his breath.

“No,” she said, shaking her head. “Not really. I may have heard the name, but I don’t remember much except the anger. I couldn’t handle that, so I decided not to be angry. The boy who shot me didn’t mean it, Bowie. He was just a little boy.”

“God.” Almost, almost he spoke up and told her the truth. Bowie felt his throat burn and his lungs hurt. “Cassie…” He felt his courage ebb and flow. What would it do to them if she found out now?

He couldn’t afford to risk it.

“I’m so sorry, Cassie.”

“Oh, don’t be. It happened so long ago, I don’t really remember being any other way.”

They fixed their plates and for the first time Bowie just picked at his food.

“What’s wrong?” She couldn’t help but ask. “Is it last night?”

“No, no,” he reassured her. “It’s just been a long day,” he told her details about the wreck. “Insurance will cover it and George is okay, so it could have been much worse. It was just a hassle.” He could see she was concerned, picking up on his mood. Smiling, he sought to reassure her. “I’m just glad to get back here with you. I want us to do things together.”

She gave him a thousand watt smile. “I look forward to trying new things with you.”

Bless her heart, she meant sex. “Oh, that’s a given. I’ll take you to heaven if you’ll let me, over and over again.” But he meant more than sex, he wanted to give her comfort and ease, he wanted to make her world a Cassie-friendly place. He wanted to take her places she’d never been able to go before. “I want to take you to Galveston.”

“What?” Cassie looked excited.

“I want to rent a beach house and spend a few days down there with you.”

“Seriously?” Her elation was obvious. “We could go together?” Cassie tried to think. “Could I do it? Most of those houses are off the ground. I can’t climb stairs and the sand…”

“Trust me, Cassie.” He picked up her hand in his. “Just leave the details to me. I’m very aware of what I need to do to make this work, and I will.”

“When?” She was bubbling with enthusiasm.

“As soon as you can get ready.”

She whirled her wheelchair in a circle, making Bowie laugh. “Don’t get dizzy, doll.”

“I’m just thinking. I have three orders to fill, but I can do that today. Felicity can mail them for me, and after that, I’m yours.”

Her happy face and sparkling eyes made Bowie’s voice hitch in his throat. He had robbed her of so much. Making up for everything would take him a lifetime, but it was a quest he longed to accept. “Yes, you are mine. I have a few things to do also. How about we plan on leaving the day after tomorrow? Would that be time enough?”

“Yes! I can do that.” But a sorrowful meow met her ears. “Oh, no. What about Sassy and Patience?”

“Let’s take them over to my house and see if they get along with my animals. If they do, George can take care of them all at once and they won’t be lonely.” And that will be the first step to getting Cassie to move in with him.

The thought seemed to worry her a bit. “I’m not sure.”

“Let’s try it.” Then, he decided to go for a hail-Mary pass. “In fact, it would go a long way to getting them used to it, if we just gathered up your stuff and you made the candles at my house. I’ll help you pack them when you’re ready.” To his satisfaction, Cassie looked dizzy. “Go ahead and pack for Galveston and I’ll load up your waxes, jars, whatever. Just point it out and I’ll take care of it.”

To put it bluntly, Bowie was a whirlwind, an irresistible force and Cassie found herself swept away in his storm surge. She did as he asked and soon she and her animals, a suitcase full of clothes and all of her work supplies were set up in Bowie’s house.

“This place is so big, I don’t know what to do with myself.” She slowly turned her chair in a circle, taking in the large den with the fireplace, the big screen TV, the comfortable couch, the pool table.

“I’ll clean off the dining table or the desk or set you up a different table, wherever you want to work to be comfortable.”

“Oh, any place will do, I don’t want to disrupt anything.” Cassie was jittery. She was very glad to be with Bowie. The offer to take her to Galveston, to stay over with him for a bit—it was all a lot to take in and process. But she was enjoying the hell out of it!

“Let me get the animals settled and you get ready for bed.”

Bowie put his hands on her shoulders from behind and kissed her cheek. He was about to walk out when she said, “Bowie?”

“What, baby?”

“Is your bedroom upstairs?”

“Fuck,” he breathed low. “Dammit! Just sit there, I’ll be right back and we’ll go together. I gotta get that fixed.”

She heard him grumbling as he left and it made her smile. She didn’t mind that he had forgotten or that it would be difficult, Bowie would take care of her. Cassie never questioned this. While he was gone, she moved a few boxes and looked in his refrigerator for a bottled water. She got thirsty during the night and since getting up was hard, she always took water to bed.

A few minutes later a Bowie-size storm blew through that whisked her up and carted her up the stairs. “I fed everyone and made sure they had a secure place in the bunk house.” He smiled and kissed her. “I’ll have to show you what I’m talking about tomorrow. I’ve built a room just for the animals so no one has to sleep out in the weather. There’s a doggie door so they can go out and do their business in an enclosed yard and climbing poles and shelves for the cats if the dogs get on their nerves. Everyone had comfortable beds and the food and beverage bar is open all night.”

Knowing how some animals suffered at the hands of their owners, Cassie gave Bowie a gentle kiss on his cheek. “You’re a good man.”

“I am a man, and I’m about to show you how good I am.” He placed her gently on the bed and began to undress right in front of her.

Cassie was entranced. He was so broad and muscled, his chest was lightly furred and wide. She wanted to touch it so much she ached. When he shrugged his shirt off his shoulders, she marveled at his biceps and knew she couldn’t even begin to reach around them with both hands. “I wish I had some music,” she quipped.

“Oh, you do?” He winked at her and pulled on his belt buckle, thrusting his hips out toward her.

“If you go get my purse, I’ll slip a dollar in your undies.”

“I think I’m worth more than a dollar, short-stuff.” He tossed his jeans across the room and jerked his briefs down.

“Yep, I would say so. You sure as hell don’t need to jelq.”

Hearing the unexpectedly erotic word come out of Cassie’s mouth almost knocked Bowie down. He slung his remaining clothes over his shoulder and crawled up on the bed toward her like a big lion. “What did you say?”

Cassie giggled. She couldn’t stop. He had straddled her, looming larger over her with a chest so wide he blocked out the light, his long hair hanging down like a black mane. “And do you know what that word means?”

“I do,” she whispered. “Do you?”

Before he could answer, she took his member between her fingers and began to milk it. “I don’t think yours needs to be lengthened, but if it did, this is the way you would do it.”

Bowie groaned. “Oh, I don’t know. I think it’s working.”

“I think you’re right.”

He grew still and let Cassie have her way with him. “And how did you acquire this risqué knowledge?”

“I read.”

“What are you reading these days, cupcake?” He started kissing her face all over. “E. L. James?”

“No,” she hiccupped a laugh. “Sable Hunter.” 

“Never heard of her,” Bowie muttered as he began unbuttoning her shirt and slipping it off of her.

“I wish I could dance for you,” Cassie whispered as she helped him disrobe her.

Bowie felt like a big hand reached into his chest and was crushing his heart. “Shhh, you’re making all of my dreams come true.” Not for one moment did he want her to even think she was less than exactly what he wanted, what he needed.

“What can we do tonight?”

She looked so hopeful that Bowie wanted to do everything he could to make her feel cherished and desired. “What do you want to do?”

“I want you to take my virginity and make me cum.” Cassie just threw the words out without taking a breath.

Bowie felt humbled. Bless her heart, she didn’t know that those two things seldom happened simultaneously. Or so he’d heard. Bowie didn’t have extensive experience in virgin territory—nil to be exact. “I want to give you your heart’s desire, but I couldn’t live with myself if I hurt you.”

“You’ll think of something.” She gave him a snarky little smile. “I trust you.”

Bowie stretched out beside her, knowing he had to be so careful. He couldn’t do this in the traditional manner, not with his cock. He was a big man and his weight could hurt her. He prayed they would discover other positions and other ways of making love that wouldn’t cause her discomfort but until they did, this would have to do.

“I wouldn’t hurt you for the world.” He kissed her, lay down next to her, reclining back on one arm so his upper body was sitting up. This way Bowie could kiss her lips or her breasts and keep one hand free to work his magic below her waist. “God, you’re sweet.” He could tell she was a little nervous, her breathing was shallow and her body was trembling ever so slightly.

“I don’t think you can operate from there.”

Her bland statement made him chuckle. “I’m a smooth operator, just watch me.” First, he began with kisses—sweet close-mouthed kisses that grew to passionate open-mouthed kisses when she wound her arm around his neck and held him close. As Bowie made love to her mouth, he let his palm glide down her smooth, toned stomach until he was palming her mound. “You’re so beautiful here, so soft and warm.” Slowly, he began to let the heat build, rubbing her between the legs, letting his fingers dip inside her folds.