Wee Rockets (21 page)

"Because Joe called me to talk about it. He trusts me already. Isn't that sweet?"

"Sure. Whatever you say. So what do you want to do tonight?"

"I think I should phone Joe."

"What about me? I'm taking the night off."

"Well, I got what I wanted from you." He shrugged, relishing the feel of her breasts moving with his arm. "I don't care what you do."

"You wanker!" She rolled away and sat at the end of the bed base with her back to him.

"What's the matter? Storming out no fun without clothes?"

"Fuck off."

"Emily, for God's sake. I was just messing about. I was thinking you could come with me to meet Joe."

Her tense shoulders dropped a little. "Really?"

Dermot enjoyed the contours of her back, highlighted by the bare forty-watt bulb hanging from the ceiling. "Yeah, really. Maybe you could wear your little denim skirt with the ‘fuck me' boots. That'd cheer any fourteen-year-old up."

Joe could smell Emily on his skin. She'd hugged him when his da introduced her and he'd tingled all over with chest-thudding excitement. She looked like a model for FHM or Maxim. Classier than a porn star, but only just. Cleavage, thighs, blonde hair and brown skin. He couldn't believe his da had a girlfriend like her. Nor could he believe that she was sitting on the sofa in his own living room. She slumped back, knees slightly parted, and Joe fought to keep his eyes from popping out of his head. His ma would kill him if she caught him trying to look up a guest's skirt. Besides, he could feel that threatening warmth in his boxers and would have been mortified to pitch a tent in her company.

Joe imagined his ma was less impressed with Emily. She'd offered that tight-lipped politeness usually reserved for teachers complaining about him on Parent Teacher Night. He guessed she didn't approve of the knee-length leather boots. Whatever she thought of the girl, his ma didn't give his da the satisfaction of acting annoyed.

"Do you want a cup of tea, Emily?" she asked.

"No thanks, Louise. I'm all right."

His ma nodded, not bothering to double-check. She didn't offer one to his da.

"I'm all right too, love," his da said.

Louise looked at him blankly. "Where do you want to take Joe tonight?"

"Just thought he'd like to go for a spin. Keep his mind off things."

"Are you in the mood to go out, Joe?"

Joe nodded, afraid he'd squeak if he tried to talk.

"Well don't be filling him full of beer this time, Dermot. I could hear him bouncing off the walls on his way to bed last night. And the smell in his room was awful this morning."

"Ma!" Joe didn't want Emily thinking he was a smelly wee kid.

"Ach be quiet, you. You're lucky I let you off with it. Plenty of mothers wouldn't. Don't push your luck."

"It's all right, Louise," his da said. "We'll be good."

She pursed her lips and huffed air through her nose. "Just bring him back before twelve. And in one piece. It was nice to meet you, Emily."

"You too, Louise."

His ma stood first. She ushered them to the door in silence. Emily grabbed his da's hand and led him away from the doorstep, high heels clacking on the small concrete yard then putt-putting on the tar footpath. Joe watched the swish of her hips for a few seconds then turned to his ma as she was closing the door. He smiled at her, she winked at him and he knew she wouldn't be pissed off in the morning. The door closed gently and Joe jogged a couple of steps to catch up with Emily and his da; they were halfway to Beechmount Avenue.

"What are we doing tonight then, da?"

"Well, I told your ma we wouldn't go drinking, so let's do something even better."

"What's that?"

His da stopped in his tracks and stooped to look Joe in the face. "I'm going to teach you how to drive."

Emily giggled. "Aw, look at his face. Precious. He don't know what to say."

"You're going to let me drive the Laguna?"

"No, I dumped that after I left you home last night. I'll pick something else up tonight."

The penny dropped. "You didn't own the Laguna. You stole it."

"Yes, I did. Does that surprise you? I told you about my past last night."

"Aye, but I thought that was your
past
. I never met a joyrider your age before."

Emily cackled and patted Joe's chest playfully. Joe's heart juddered.

"I prefer to think of myself as a thief, Joe. Joyriding can be fun, but it achieves little and draws too much attention. No, I steal cars to sell them on, or to get from A to B. I'm not really a joyrider, as such."

"So where are we going to go?"

"Well, it's not a good idea to steal a car from someone's doorstep. You never know when they might look out the window and come at you with a baseball bat. Best thing to do is find a car park. It severely decreases the chance of getting caught, especially since most CCTV cameras aren't worth a shit. You get a better selection too. I thought we'd go to the Royal tonight. Pickings were always plentiful there if I remember right, and it's close."

At the car park, his da chuckled when he saw the yellow and black-striped rising barrier at the visitors' car park outside the maternity ward. "Do they charge for parking everywhere in this money-grabbing city nowadays?"

Joe shrugged.

"Maybe we should go somewhere else, Dermot," Emily said.

"You're probably right, babe. But could you really be arsed walking to another car park? I think the Park Centre might be the closest, but that's a good fifteen minutes uphill."

"So what's your plan, darling?"

"We'll ram the barrier."

"Fucking hell!" Joe said. He giggled with nerves.

"Are you serious, Dermot?"

"Yeah, sure why not? We'll give the kid a show. We'll need something fast and solid though. No Novas or Escorts."

Emily ran a tongue along her front teeth. She looked pretty and demonic in one sensuous moment. "Maybe Joe should pick."

"Great idea! Son?"

"Are you serious?" Joe asked.

His da nodded.

Joe saw the one he wanted, even before they'd ducked under the barrier. Big, mean and leaking gangster attitude, the Honda CR-V stood out from the rows of saloons and hatchbacks. The black four-wheel-drive drew Joe to it with gravitational force.

He pointed. "That one."

His da whistled a long breath. "Nice taste. Definitely big and fast. Looks like the 2001 model. Only one crossbar in the grille, see? That one's got the simple but noisy car alarm and immobiliser. Not as easy to crack as the Civic or the Accord. Bit of a challenge."

"Oh, right. Well I can pick a different one if you don't want to risk it."

"I never said that, Joe. I said it'd be a challenge. Which means, an opportunity to show off. All I need is my trusty flathead screwdriver, wire clippers and a good-sized stone. Watch and learn."

His da drew his tools from different pockets in his combat-style trousers. Joe missed most of the magic. The window crimped and fell into the passenger seat. The alarm blared twice and the hazard lights flashed. Joe felt his heart jump into his throat. His da bent in under the steering column and the alarm ceased. A few seconds later, he climbed into the passenger seat and leant over the steering wheel. Then the big engine rumbled to life. Joe looked at Emily and she gave him the thumbs up. He gestured with a sweep of his arm that she should climb into the Honda first.

"Oh, right little gent, eh?"

Joe felt his cheeks redden and thanked God for the fading light. He followed her around to the passenger side so he could watch her step up into her seat. The denim skirt skimmed the bottom of her ass as she lifted her leg. Joe prayed for a strong summer breeze. No joy. Still, he'd an image to fall asleep to for the next week tucked away in his memory. He clambered into the backseat and sat in the middle.

"Buckle up, Joe," his da said. "This might get a little bumpy."

His da reversed the Honda out of its space and braked hard.

"Shite, I forgot about the steering lock. Must be getting sloppy in my old age."

He slipped the flathead screwdriver into the seam between the steering wheel and the steering column. Something clunked and Joe's da removed the screwdriver. He rotated the wheel with the palm of his open hand, lined the Honda up with the exit barrier and sank the toe. Joe felt like he'd been shoved in the chest. Emily's laughter morphed into a scream as they hurtled towards impact. Joe double-checked the seatbelt was secured in its buckle. And then they hit it. The CR-V barely rocked on its suspension. The steel bar tore out of its joint. Joe whooped as they bunny-hopped over the speed ramps on the way to Broadway Roundabout. Then they were cruising up the Donegal Road and from there up the Falls Road and onto the Andersonstown Road. They pulled into the car park of the Kennedy Shopping Centre. Most of the spaces lay empty as only Xtra Vision and the Curley's off licence opened past ten at night. His da stopped in the corner of the car park furthest from the shopping centre's main doors.

"Your turn now, wee man."

Joe didn't hesitate for a second. He was standing by the driver's door before his da slipped out of his seatbelt.

"Christ," Emily said. "You're keen."

He didn't need to adjust the driving position, his long legs fit perfectly, but he fiddled with the mirror a little to stretch out the anticipation. Then he turned to talk to his da in the backseat.

"So what do I do?"

"Well, this is an automatic, so it'll be wee buns to get going. Just keep your left foot on the floor, slot the wee gearstick into drive and push down on the long pedal on your right."

"And how do I stop?"

"Worry about that when you get going, son. There'll be time to figure it out. Look how much space there is."

Emily patted his thigh and his heart threatened to explode. "And so what if you don't figure it out, Joe? It's not your car."

Dermot chuckled. "Good point, sweetheart. Now let's get this fucking beast rolling."

Joe took a deep breath and stomped down on the accelerator. The four-wheel-drive SUV lurched, but didn't stall. Joe's teeth clacked together as he bounced in his seat. He eased off the gas and the forward motion smoothed out a little. They trundled on at about ten miles-per-hour. He felt insanely powerful.

"Don't forget to steer, darling."

Emily's calm voice reeled him in. He jerked the wheel to the left, narrowly missing an abandoned shopping trolley.

"Ach, you would have got ten points for that," his da said.

Joe looked over his shoulder to smirk at him.

"You should maybe face front until you get a little more experience behind the wheel, son."

He turned back and adjusted his course to avoid a parked Nissan Micra. Then he upped the speed a little. He took the car up and down the car park ten times and his confidence grew with each length.

"Can I take it out on the road, da?"

"Sure, why not? You're doing great. Take her on out the gates and swing left. We'll go on out the Airport Road and see if we can find an open field. See how she goes off road."

"Fucking sweet."

Joe made short work of his first public road outing, quickly learning the joys of velocity on the almost empty road. Only a handful of cars passed them in the opposite direction and at one point Emily calmly told him to inch to the left a little when a van approached them, riding a little too close to the dividing line. After passing a couple of locked gates, Joe suggested they ram their way into a field. His da laughed at the ballsy suggestion then told him to go for it.

"But pick one with a wooden gate, okay?"

As soon as Joe spotted a wooden gate, he veered off the road and crunched into it at an angle. Emily screamed. The steering wheel bucked in Joe's hands and slipped out of his grip. The passenger side headlight went out and the gate shuddered and cracked but didn't come off its posts. The powerful two litre engine grumbled on.