Weak for Him (18 page)

From the back closet, Sophia, the
snobbish dress tailor, pulled a midnight blue, semi-sequined
A-lined dress from the closet.

"For twenty-five percent of the
cost, I can have it ready by this afternoon at five."

"That works for us."

Sophia guided me toward the
dressing room with the gown in tow. The sleeves fell on my
shoulders and insinuated my collarbone. Give me a set of big
glasses and an up-do, and I would be a replica of Audrey
Hepburn.

I walked barefoot into the room
and stood upon the pedestal. From the corner of the room, oohs and
ahhs echoed from the surrounding women admiring the dress. I tried
to ignore them.

"You'll clean up real nice. Just a
set of pearls, a pair of nice heels, and you'll be set to attend
the party."

"Party?"

"Shit. You weren't supposed to
know yet." Jesse glared at Sophia, who didn't and wouldn't
apologize for the slip up. Looks like she met her match.

"What party?" I asked.

"That shouldn't be your concern at
the moment," Jesse said.

With a tug, Sophia tightened the
waist on the dress, straightened the collar where a modest amount
of breast showed, and hemmed the skirt to calf-length. The dark
blue dress screamed elegant while my mind screamed dirty whore.
Images of Finnley tying me to the bed and licking my body in
naughty places overtook my mind. I wanted to give him the best fuck
of his life until we both lay breathless in each other's arms.
Although I was a virgin, I knew what I wanted. My body begged to be
touched, and the thought of Finn fucking me made me wet.

"Does that sound okay?" Jesse
stared at me.

"What's that?"

"Letting Sophia pick out your
shoes."

"It's whatever. Size
eight."

I went into the dressing room,
lifted the dress over my head, and placed it on the hanger. My
panties were wet with thoughts of Finn, but my body was
deflated.

With a smirk, I placed two fingers
down my panties. My nipples hardened as I touched myself. I removed
my bra and panties and took a good look at myself in the mirror.
Horny girl. But I need this.
With my thumb and index finger,
I pinched my nipples and felt small jolts of electricity rush
through my body. Was I really going to do this in the most stuck up
place in Vegas? Fuck it.

I leaned up against the wall and
parted my legs. I wanted the satisfaction of watching myself in the
mirror. Being able to see my body, to see the pinkness between my
open legs, turned me on. I opened my legs further and rubbed my
fingers up and down, teasing myself. I moved two fingers around,
just as Finn taught me. My clit hardened, and my breathing
increased. The sweet build inside of me began. Oh, it was happening
so quickly this time.

Trying to savor the moment, I
moved my hands up and down my breasts and even dipped the edge of
one finger inside, but only enough to make me quake with want and
desire. I closed my eyes and imagined Finn watching me pleasure
myself as he stroked his hardness.
Finn.
I didn't even know
I was whispering his name as I touched myself. My body begged for
it, pleading for me to give it more. More fantasies of Finn fucking
me on the kitchen counter, on the table, in the pool, followed.
Finn.
And then the rush of emotions overcame me. I moaned as
my body exploded with sweet release and I felt the powerful clinch
down below. Not wanting the orgasm to end, I slowly continued to
touch myself until the sensitivity was too much for me to handle. I
sucked in a deep breath and my heartbeat raced. For the rest of the
day, this virgin would be useless. But at least the sexual
frustration had vanished.

Knock. Knock. Knock.

"Hurry up." Jesse stood on the
other side of the door. I could see her heels from under the crack
in the door.

"Getting dressed, be right
out."

Jesse stormed away, and I rushed
to dress into my clothes. I snatched the hanger with the soon-to-be
altered dress and headed toward Sophia. With a look of disapproval,
she jerked the dress from my hand. She knew. They all knew. But
quite frankly, I didn't give a shit.

She led me to the counter, leaned
over, and quietly whispered, "We aren't idiots, you
know?"

I leaned over and whispered back,
"Maybe if you had an orgasm every once in a while, you all wouldn't
be so uptight."

Then in a full voice, I said,
"Call me if you need some masturbation pointers." Sophia fumed as I
left the building.

Although my body relaxed, my
nerves were on the edge. Friday night, I would no longer be a
virgin, and it no longer would be a big deal. I could move on with
my life and have sex with whomever. No more bid wars, no more
jealousy, no more virgin, and for the first time, I was truly okay
with that.

The car seemed like a good place
to get away, close my eyes, and run through my day so far. Jesse
stormed behind me, not saying a word.

The rest of the day flew by. My
legs felt silky smooth, and so did everything else. Once my hair
was trimmed, eyebrows shaped, and body massaged, I just wanted to
take a nap. The mimosas didn't help. Jesse left me at the spa
alone, and I couldn't help but think about Friday.

Would I feel any
different?

Would I no longer be special to
Finn, Luke, and to the other Elite who wanted me? Did it even
matter in the realm of things?

I lounged in the waiting area, and
then dressed.

My life would change.

There was no doubt about
that.

I sucked in a deep breath and made
my way inside the house. V sat in the driveway, so I knew Finn was
home. After the shit he pulled today, and after the mess he left me
in, my feelings were broken. Hurt because he validated what I knew.
We would never be anything more than what we were:
coworkers.

But did I want more?

Or was it just an addicting game
that I had to win?

My feelings were in braids, and I
didn't know which strand I wanted as I tried to undo
them.

Before I opened the door, I
secretly hoped he wouldn't be within sight. My hands were full of
the midnight blue dress, lingerie, and three-inch heels Sophia
picked out for me. I just wanted to go upstairs.

As I walked in, Finn sat at the
table with a crossword puzzle. My breath hitched as I looked at
him. But I forced it away, trying not to give him another glance,
and climbed the stairs two at a time. Refusing to turn around, I
went to my room and lightly swung open the door. Everything that
was in my hands fell to the floor and I leaned against the door
with my eyes closed.

On the bed, there was a black
envelope and a small box. I didn't want to read it, but curiosity
killed me. Giving in begrudgingly, I peeled open the envelope and
pulled out the soft paper.

Wear this on Friday.

-F

I lifted the lid on the box and
moved the white tissue paper aside. A black mask with silver
feathers and embroidered doves lay in the bottom of the box. The
dress, the shoes, the mask… I would attend a masquerade ball.
Everyone kept the secret from me, and Finnley made sure to have his
Girl prepared. The mask matched the lining of the dress and the
lingerie perfectly, and somehow I knew he had handpicked each
piece.

I placed the mask back in its box
and the rest of the virginity-losing-gear in the closet.

Nineteen

D
ays and nights passed, and
Finn avoided me like the plague until Friday came. I hadn't heard
from Luke in days, and Lori was away on business.

Loneliness lingered and left me to
my thoughts. Not random ones, but terrible thoughts of my parent's
death. I tried to busy myself in books and fantasy worlds, and the
fictional people helped take me away. Mr. Darcy and others filled
my waking and sleeping moments. Each day seemed to be a repeat of
the one before until
Fucking Friday
arrived.

Fucking Friday
, I had
termed it, was the day that I would have sexy time. I joked about
watching porn, but without anyone to talk to, I almost wanted to
have a porn-a-thon to get some sort of idea. I would call Abbie,
but the bitchy text from her threatening to punch me in the throat
the next time she saw me because I didn't call or see her while I
was home kept me silent.

After I showered, I looked in the
mirror and studied each part of my naked body, wondering if I would
feel different the day afterward, or if all would be the same. I
would lose my virginity. Would I enjoy the first time? Would it
hurt? Would Luke use whips or chains, or would he be sweet and
careful with me? I didn't know the answer because I felt like there
were things about him I didn't know.

Hours passed, and I fidgeted with
my hair and makeup until I felt pretty. Barrel curls, smoky gray
eye shadow, and deep red lipstick matched the attire and my mood. I
wanted to be scandalous and sexy, and once I slipped into the
lingerie, I did.

I placed the mask on my face. It
fit like it were designed for me alone, just as everything else
had, because it was.

A smile crept across my face, and
a tinge of excitement traveled through me. If it wouldn't have been
a social event, I would have gone in the sexy undergarments and a
long coat. Imagining how Luke would lust over me made me feel
powerful.

Always ever so punctual, I arrived
downstairs early and waited for Charlie. I peeked out the window
and saw V on the circle drive. My nerves went haywire when I
thought about the box with the little ribbon, the lingerie, and how
I hadn't spoken to him in days. Not since the day he walked away. I
closed my eyes and hoped he wouldn't see me before I met Luke. I
didn't need him to drive a deadly spear into my
happiness.

Lady Luck was on my side this
time. I escaped without seeing Finn, but the silence that lingered
in the limo gave me too much time to think and overanalyze his
actions.

Exotic cars lined the circle
drive. Chatter and music drifted from the house. To my right sat
the black and silver mask. As we slowed, I adjusted it over my face
and took a deep breath. Tonight was the night.

A man wearing stark white gloves
and a penguin-flapped suit escorted me to the entrance where a
woman handed me a crystal flute of champagne. Resist, I did
not.

I glided through the crowd like a
ghost in a graveyard, searching for Luke. Pretty girls accompanied
handsome men. Fancy shoes and dresses combined with evening hair,
and elegant masks of all different shapes and sizes. Some wore full
masks; others wore those that only covered half their
faces.

I entered the living area where a
staircase rose up the middle. The second floor looked over the
crowd below. Soft music followed by laughter surrounded the
business talk, but Luke was nonexistent.

I finished my champagne and
replaced it with another. Fresh strawberries floated in the top of
my glass and the sweetness filled my mouth, making my taste buds
explode with the delicious flavor. Curious, I took the stairs to
the upper floor and smiled as I passed familiar, but unknown
faces.

He had done well with decorating
the place. At the top of the winding stairs hung a perfect
rendition of Van Gogh's
Starry Night
. The detail in the
brush strokes and the preciseness it took to get it just right
amazed me.

I continued to sip my strawberry
champagne, and walked further down the halls, appreciating each
painting. At the end of the hall, a picture hung that I had
experienced in real life. The painting portrayed Luke and I at the
park the first night we met. The moon held the craters, and glow of
the real one, but the stars shone brighter. In the painting, Luke
smiled at… me. My eyes were looking toward the ground, and I
laughed. Every characteristic and detail represented my innocence
in the simplest form. Innocence I felt I had lost somewhere in the
mix.

"Do you like it?"

Startling me from my gaze, I
gulped and turned.
Luke.

"I love it. But the detail… it's
amazing."

"I painted what I remembered of
the first night we spent together. I named this one
Something
New
. The others I've painted have been abstract, copies, or
simple illustrations, and I treasure them. But this, this is a
memory that will be forever burned into my mind," Luke
said.

"You painted this?"

The more I learned, the more I
realized I was out of my league. His baby blues shined behind his
navy mask. They sparkled like the diamonds he had painted in the
sky. He smiled, nodded, and continued to walk down the hallway,
describing each painting. I lusted over the colors and shading.
Each one held a memory, they weren't just art. They were
experiences on canvas.

"I'm happy you're here. I halfway
thought you wouldn't show."

"Luke," I whispered and squeezed
his hand, "I wouldn't miss this for the world. I'm happy to be
here."