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Authors: David McIntee

Tags: #We will Destroy your Planet: An Alien’s Guide to Conquering the Earth

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BOOK: We Will Destroy Your Planet
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There is, of course, no reason why any human programmers should be able to interpret a truly alien computer system or language from a truly alien civilization, but the idea of messing up alien invaders by infiltrating virii to their computers has been so prevalent in human propaganda for so long that it is one of the first things the resistance to you will think of, so why take the risk of being complacent about it?

If you have the use of matter transmission technology – and it will have to be a technological process for this to work, not an innate teleportation ability – you may be able to quickly replicate reinforcements, depending on how your system works. Assuming it follows the standard convention of breaking down matter at one end, transmitting the data to the destination, and reassembling the matter there, it would surely be possible – if confusing – to copy the data as it goes through, and re-send it as often as you like. Essentially you could ‘re-print' as many copies of the same data as you like, allowing you to rematerialize as many copies of the same teleported soldier as you want. This would be a good way to create whole units, or even armies, to spawn directly into the combat area, or at least at your nearest base to the combat area.

This technique could cause psychological problems, of course, with all the copies claiming to be the original, so you will need to assemble a group of volunteers beforehand, who have been thoroughly screened and trained to know what will happen, and understand their situation in advance. It would also be advisable to not send the original volunteers into combat, since they are the original natural ones. How the copies would be treated under your ethical standards – whether they have the same rights as natural-born originals, for example – is a matter for your philosophers, and possibly lawyers.

Otherwise, you have two real options: breeding (including cloning), or recruiting auxiliaries/cannon-fodder locally.

Obviously the problem with breeding natural replacements is that, depending on how quickly your species matures, you could be looking at many years before each generation is ready. Worse still, if they're all individuals with anything resembling free will, they might not want to be part of the campaign when they
have
matured. The same problem applies to true cloning. You can create identical copies of your existing forces at a cellular level, but they still have to be gestated and matured as per normal, and their personalities and minds, having been shaped by a different upbringing than the originals, will not be the same.

You can try to mitigate this by providing the clones with as close to the upbringing and experience of the originals as possible, but there will always be differences. Alternatively, you can try modifying the clones by adding genetic memory and tendencies.

The last option, recruiting auxiliaries locally, is always worth considering. Humans are a violent species, yet also pliable, and can be guided into living certain ways, with the application of authority, religion, or bribery. You may be concerned about the danger of human auxiliaries rebelling, and it's certainly the case that a percentage of them would, but that's why you should give them less effective weapons that will not work against yourselves. A larger percentage, however, would be effectively loyal if treated correctly, because humans are hardwired to belong to tribal groupings. This percentage who are willing to view you as a viable tribal grouping will increase with time. Humans born and raised after your landings will be more used to your presence, and thus more willing to be a part of life with your species.

LIVING ON EARTH

Unless your sole reason for attacking the Earth was to keep your fighting forces in training, to justify their continued existence, or for a simple desire for combat, your time on the planet will not be spent entirely in fighting.

At some point you will have subdued or avoided all local resistance, and be free to do whatever it was that you came to Earth to do in the first place. Perhaps you will be stripping the planet of its resources, to send them back home, or to use in a war effort elsewhere. Maybe you simply need room for your expanding population, or a new home after some misfortune befell your own. Perhaps you even just want a place to visit for fun and recreation. Whatever the reasons, there are things you'll need to think about and be prepared for.

ENVIRONMENTAL AWARENESS, PART 2

Aside from the climate and gravity, which have already been mentioned, there are many other environmental factors that you will have to take into account when it comes to living on Earth for extended periods of time.

There are many different types of life form on the planet, some of which can prove surprisingly dangerous, whether they be tiny microbes, or large and fearsome predators. Local weather conditions and geological events must be considered when choosing sites for important facilities or landing areas.

If you are intending to stay on the Earth for a long time, for whatever reason, you will have to look at how best to take up residence, and what sort of residence will be best for you. While it is always possible to remain aboard ships in orbit, or even to land them on the surface, there is more practical value in constructing more permanent settlements.

Building cities and settlements is a complex business, as there are so many factors to consider about them, even without military concerns about security and defensibility. You must be sure the geology is stable, the temperature correct, the structure secure against landslides, earthquakes, floods, drought, and so on. The main geological and seismic issues you will face are volcanoes, earthquakes, and tsunami. There are volcanoes and seismic quakes on other planets also, so you are presumably familiar with the concept. The largest volcano in the Solar system isn't even on Earth, actually, but on Mars. Earth, however, has many more volcanoes, some of which have been dormant or extinct for centuries, and others which are still active.

If you come from a hot and sulphurous planet, then you may feel relatively comfortable making a home away from home in one of the Earth's volcanic areas, but otherwise they are generally best avoided when choosing locations for landing sites, planetary defensive emplacements, and large-scale military facilities. There are too many risks associated with areas prone to volcanic or seismic activity, especially near the oceans.

Many of the Earth's volcanoes are actually to be found underwater. This is because, in general, volcanic and seismic activity is centred along the areas where the planet's tectonic plates – the vast rafts of bedrock that form the main solid crust of the planet, floating on the more viscous lithosphere – meet. Where the edges of the plates meet, molten rock is forced upwards towards the surface, and can emerge through fissures and hollow mountains. Similarly, where these plates meet, and where other fault lines within the plates rub against each other, seismic quakes are triggered. Several of these plates meet in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean, while three of the four sides of the Pacific plate meet other plates under the Pacific Ocean. These underwater tectonic regions have formed underwater ridges of volcanoes.

Where seismic and volcanic activity takes place underwater, there is a danger of a tsunami following the original wave. This occurs when a pressure wave propagates across the ocean at high speed. When it reaches shallower coastal areas, it shortens in wavelength and vastly increases in amplitude. This will cause the water to draw back from the coast first, adding to the amplitude, i.e. the height. A massive wall of water can then hit coastal areas with enough force to smash buildings, carry ships miles inland, and kill thousands.

These areas – coastlines around the edges of the Pacific plate, are best avoided when choosing suitable locations for facilities and landing sites.

Likewise, the central plains of the United States are prone to tornadoes, while the east coast of the US, and the Caribbean islands around it, are prone to hurricanes – massive storms capable of tearing down buildings and completely changing the local geography. You will need to be careful in selecting suitable environments in which to construct settlements and facilities, which are stable and not at risk from either seismic events or extreme weather.

At the same time, you will want to build in environments that are suitable and comfortable for your species and purpose. This will be easiest if you have come from another Earth, either in the past, future, or a parallel dimension. In any of these cases you should, and no doubt will, take up residence in the same cities or regions on this Earth, as you occupy in your own Earth or time zone.

If you are adapted to a cold climate, your best option is to build in Antarctica, northern Canada or central Siberia. All of these areas are relatively stable, though areas of Canada and Siberia can warm up enough to be home to mosquitoes in the height of summer. If you want cold all year round, Antarctica is the place to go. Of the two polar caps, this southern one is more suited to the construction of cities and spaceports as it is a proper rocky continent, albeit one covered with ice. The northern cap, the Arctic, by contrast, is actually just a floating ice sheet over water, and so is less suited to large-scale building.

The Arctic is also known to be visited by human nuclear-powered submarines from time to time, which are capable of breaking their way upwards through the ice. Obviously this is a vulnerability that you should not accept quietly. The Antarctic is as far as it is possible to get from any of the main military powers on the Earth.

If you need humidity, the most suitable rain forest areas would be those in South America. These areas have the advantage of also being stretched across the southern tropic below the equator, and the tropics are the best latitudes from which to launch vehicles into orbit. If you are adapted to dry heat, any of the North American, African, or Asian desert areas will be perfect. Again, these areas are mostly stable, as is the Spanish desert.

If you are aquatic, the oceans are very welcoming, but bear those ocean floor volcanic ridges in mind. Also bear in mind that the oceans are as filled with life as the land surfaces of the Earth. Although none of the aquatic life forms native to Earth have limbs of digits capable of manipulating tools, this does not mean that there is no intelligent or sentient life there. Given the prevalence of liquid water on the surface, and its precipitation in the atmosphere, if your species is vulnerable to harm – or dissolution – by water, you should steer well clear of the planet, no matter how suitable its crop fields are as an artistic canvas.

INDIGENOUS LIFE

The range of species currently occupying the Earth is incredibly diverse, although merely the latest in a long line of life forms over the planet's four and a half billion-year history. The main types of life you will encounter there are: plants, fungi, bacteria, virii, insects, molluscs, fish, reptiles and amphibians, birds, mammals and exotic undersea creatures. All terrestrial life forms are made up of organic cells, constructed of a nucleus surrounded by protoplasm. The number of cells varies between life forms from one only, all the way up to hundreds of trillions.

PLANTS, LICHENS, AND FUNGI

Non-mobile life forms that absorb liquid and nutrients via the soil, and use sunlight to convert carbon dioxide into oxygen – plants – are eaten by most forms of life on the planet, and also depend on other life forms – often insects – as a vector for carrying spores and thus enabling reproduction. Very few plants consume animal or insect life directly, but there are a few that deliberately entrap insects or small mammals.

Plant material is used as a food source by pretty much all life on the planet – even carnivorous predators also consume plant material for certain nutrients, or to assist with digestion. Lichens and fungi are similar immobile species, though they have a different cellular construction, and do not have the male and female genders, which true plants do.

Other plant material, called wood, especially from the larger types called trees, is also useful in construction and manufacturing, and you will probably find wood useful in many ways. It is also recycled into paper, upon which documents and even books about conquering the Earth are printed. This, if nothing else, proves that plant material is of vital importance.

Some plant material is nutritious while others are poisonous. Since you will need to arrange a food supply during your stay on Earth, and importing everything is both a resource expense and a potential vulnerability to attacks that could weaken your forces (and therefore your hold on the planet), you should be sure to test all organic materials for suitability for conversion into food. Even material which is either ineffective or actually harmful in its raw form can be processed into something useful, with the application of correct research and treatment.

INSECTS

Insects are the most common visible form of life on the planet. Single celled bacteria may be more numerous, but they are not visible to the naked (human) eye. Insects generally are, and there are also more insect species than any other type of life on the planet.

BOOK: We Will Destroy Your Planet
8.21Mb size Format: txt, pdf, ePub
ads

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