Wanting Reed (Break Me) BOOK 2 (40 page)

When we arrive at my apartment, I reluctantly lift myself off him as he pays the driver and we exit the car. Reed immediately scans the neighborhood and gazes up at the two-story brownstone that I live in and then back at me.

“Is this a safe neighborhood?” he asks, scratching his head and looking across the street. I chuckle, remembering my dad making the same comment and adding another padlock to my door.

“Do you work for ADT?” I snicker.

“What’s so funny about wanting the woman I love to be safe at all times?” He frowns playfully and picks me up off my feet. He exhales a deep, rich laugh that sends a coursing burn of need throughout my entire body. He gently sets me down on the sidewalk and brushes the hair away from my face and cups my cheek in his strong, tender hands. “Doll, I’m so fucking happy.” He leans down and kisses me. “I want to fix things with you. I want to make things right.”

Every inch of my skin is tingling, like my life is about to change dramatically. Too many thoughts rush through my mind and swirl continuously. Before we go any further tonight, Reed needs to tell me everything that kept him away for so long. Can we save each other and be happy together after we clear the air?

He holds my hand as we walk up the front steps and releases it for me to unlock the door. I switch on the lamp watching him as he enters and takes in my new place as closes the door behind him. My apartment seems to explode with his energy; he brings new life to my space, something that’s been missing that I can’t explain.

His mind is working as he rakes his fingers through his hair. He knows what I want to hear, what I
need
to hear so we can move forward. Minutes pass as we stand motionless, staring at each other and battling some unforeseen force. Lowering his head to his chest he slides his hand over his face. The expression in his eyes tells me that he knows what I’m about to ask of him. He looks tired. I want to comfort him, but it’s not about him anymore. It’s about me now. I come first.

It’s amazing how his eyes send so many different messages just in the way he looks at me. The same eyes that can make me feel secure, sexy, and desirable, like I am the only person in the world that matters to him. I swallow a big gulp of air and blow it out. Even after being gone, he still has that effect on me, crushing me with his presence.

“I’m glad you’re giving me a chance.” He whispers, taking me in his arms

“I’m good at giving people chances.” I smile meekly in spite of myself. “So, you came back. To tell the truth?”

“Yes.” He blinks a few times and breaks eye contact, looking down at the floor and then back up at me with his deep, pained blue eyes. “Actually…no, it was supposed to happen months ago. Not now. I was going to tell you everything when I got back. I swear it.” His voice wavers. “You have to believe that I wouldn’t do something like this to you after everything we shared.”

“You lied to me.” I say, shaking my head. “How do I know you won’t do it again?” I hope to God he can promise me that. I can’t bear the idea of him failing me or us again.

“I won’t,” he answers with conviction.

“I just need to know the reason for the secrets,” I breathe.

He fidgets, scratching his head and hesitating for a moment. I get lost watching him, the way he moves, the rise and fall of his chest, the stubble that covers his chiseled jaw, and his full red lips. I drop my head, concealing both my desire and the urges that seem to burn at the surface. My body needs that connection with him, to pick up where we left off. I smell him and feel the unquestionable pull that brought us together. His eyes glisten and torch my soul. He’s hurting like I’m hurting.

“Maybe you shouldn’t have left the first time.” I sigh. “We wouldn’t be standing here like this now.” Or would we?

“I know.” He shakes his head in frustration. “Elle, I was shielding you. Then when I decided to tell you, things happened back home that I couldn’t control. You have to believe me. I meant every word I said to you. Every fucking word.” He drops his eyes. He looks so beautiful and powerful. I want to believe him. “I didn’t want to leave to begin with. I didn’t want to leave you, but my family needed me.”

“I understand that, but everything else. Your secrets? Did you think that was all going to go away?”

“Actually...” I watch painfully as he rubs his forehead, trying to formulate a response. “Yes.” A haunted expression lingers in his eyes as if he sees a ghost.

“Really? That’s it?” I reply incredulously. “Is that how much you thought of me?”

“It was my problem. I was handling it.”

“And how did that work out for you?” I question sharply. “You know what? It doesn’t matter what your problem was. The problem is how you handled it. I’m more than upset that you didn’t think enough of me to tell me. I could have supported you.” I turn away, knowing there is nowhere to go. We need to get past this somehow, no matter how much it hurts.

My chest tightens as I watch her. I would give anything to know what she is thinking about. “Elle, look at me.” I grab her hand as she steps away and turn her to face me. “Just know that I took care of it for now. I’m in the clear. There’s nothing you have to worry about anymore. I couldn’t have you or anyone else involved. I hope you understand that I never intended to leave you like that.”

I stare at her devouring her with my eyes. A fucking angel. She looks manic. Her hair is in disarray, and her eyes are dark and drenched in emotion. “Tell me how you feel. Tell me how you hate me. Get it all out. Hit me.” Touching her is like heaven. Her skin under my fingers is my antidote. I don’t feel the pain anymore. I feel my eyes beginning to sting from missing her so much and for hurting her like this.

“I...I don’t know how long it’s going to take for me to heal from this.” Her voice cracks, and her throat spasms as she swallows her thoughts. “Don’t do it again.” She drops her eyes, her body already softening under my touch. “I don’t want to hurt like this anymore.”

“I won’t. I hate myself for putting you…us…through this. Ever since the day we met, I wanted you but I didn’t want to drag you into my life with everything I was going through. I wanted to clean it up.” Lifting her chin, I catch the tear that slides down her cheek. “I haven’t so much as thought about another woman since the day I met you. I haven’t felt this way for anyone in my entire life.” I turn her, clenching her against my chest. “Tell me we can get past this. We can fix this. Tell me you want this. You want us,” I whisper, grazing my lips across her neck. “I want you.”

“I want you,” she breathes. “I need you.” It was her invitation. She was letting me back in. She wants this with me as much as I want it with her.

I coil her hair in my hands and pull it back, exposing her beautiful neck. She moans as I gently trace the column of her neck with my lips. She thrusts herself into me when she feels my erection pressed against her. I force her around to face me. “Doll, I’ve waited months to hear your voice, to hear you say those words to me. You’re the first thing I think about in the morning and the last thing I think about at night. And then, you invade my thoughts and dreams. I couldn’t be away from you much longer. The idea of you being with someone other than me was driving me to the brink. I wasn’t going to give up. Ever.”

“I have never belonged to anyone before. I want to belong to you,” she speaks as she leans up to kiss me.

“I don’t know what I was doing before I met you. I think I was slowly dying, and you brought me back to life. You breathe air into me.” I caress her face and pull her in for a long kiss. She sighs when I release her. “I am so in love with you.” She locks eyes with me. Taking my hands, she laces her fingers in mine. The way she looks at me tells a story. She is giving us a second chance because she knows our love is strong enough to get us through this. Our love is worth a second chance.

“Take me.” She tugs the front of my shirt, pressing her body against my chest. Her voice is full of lust and want as she gazes at me with wild desire. I blow out a breath, imagining her naked body underneath her clothes and get aroused in a heartbeat. I trace the silk of her red top before I slip it over her head and slide her skirt down her gorgeous legs, running my hands up the length of her lush smooth body. I finger the lace of her black bra and caress the curve of her breasts as she closes her eyes and bites her lip in anticipation. Keeping her arms over her head, I release her breasts from her bra, kissing one breast while I roll the other with my thumb and forefinger. I remember how she responded to my touch, and nothing has changed. Her body craves it, and I’m more than willing to satisfy her needs.

“Do it now,” she whimpers, stroking the muscles of my arms. She grabs my neck, crushing her lips to mine and sending a jolt to all the right places. I just about lose all self-control when she moans into my mouth and rubs her body against my straining dick.

I scoop her up and impatiently make my way down the hallway to her bedroom. She giggles when I bump into the wall and points to the door on the right. I tap open the door with my foot and step into her dimly lit bedroom. The scent of vanilla permeates the room, but I’m drawn instantly to the large, king-sized mahogany bed in the center. I can’t wait to get her on it. All I can think about is making her scream my name more than once. I feel her heart against my chest and her lush lips pressed to my neck. I’m yearning to have my mouth and hands all over her as I gently lay her onto the bed. I want to take her so fucking bad it hurts. I promptly strip off my clothes. I crawl over her, touching and exploring every part of her body, soaking her in with my hands, mouth and eyes. I’ve memorized her every flawless curve of her body, down to the birthmark right below her belly button.

“Baby, you got a tattoo?” I whisper, skimming my lips over her warm skin, tracing the half moon with seven tiny dangling yellow stars inked on her hip with my finger.

“Yes,” she purrs, stroking my hair with her soft fingertips.

“Live by the sun. Love by the moon,” I murmur, leaning down to kiss the tattoo. “Baby, it’s perfect, like you.”

“You…you inspired it,” she says through half-lidded eyes.

“Like you inspire me.”

“The last time I heard your voice was when I looked up at the moon. When you didn’t come back, I remembered what you said that night and I knew you meant it. I knew you would make your way back to me,” she whispers.

“I’ll always be right here. I’ll never leave you again,” I whisper, trailing my hand down her chest. I feel her heart rate accelerating.

“What I need right now more than anything else is for you to make love to me.” She smiles at me in a way that makes me ache. I am drunk at the sight of her.

“You have no idea how much I want to be inside you right now.” She grasps my hair and guides my face to her breasts. I kiss them, suck them, and lick them. I tease her entire body with my tongue and hands as I peel off her panties. She parts her legs as I touch her. Fuck. I need her. She reaches down and begins to run her fingertips up and down my arm. I clench my teeth. Her touch is like electricity. “You are so gorgeous.”

“Please,” she begs, feeling my hand pushing her thighs farther apart.

“Baby, you don’t know how long I’ve waited to taste and feel you again. I don’t want to rush this.” I slip a finger inside her, feeling her arch against my hand. She’s so wet and ready. Her breathing becomes heavier. “I’m gonna make you feel good,” I whisper, sliding down her body. “God, I want to taste you. Can I?” I say huskily.

She’s too winded to speak, and I’m too impatient to wait as I eagerly position myself between her legs. Clutching underneath her thighs, I spread them so she’s completely mine, completely vulnerable. Feeling her legs tremble under my hands, I flick my tongue over her swollen nub. Tasting her all over again is like nirvana. She moans, grabbing at my hair and goading me to give her more. “That’s it, baby. I love the way you taste on my tongue.” I savor her, knowing she’s close to ecstasy. I move my finger inside her, peering across her body as she arches her back and pulls at my hair. “Come for me,” I say, encouraging her as I continue thrusting my fingers inside her, gliding my thumb over her clit while sucking her sensitive skin until the moment she unravels for me.

“
Oh... Reed.”
She tightens and quakes, crying out as the orgasm rips through her. My body burns for her. My dick is throbbing. All the nights I dreamt of her, all the nights I spent alone imagining her body. All my pain gets lost in this one moment for me to pleasure her.

“I love when you say my name when you come,” I rasp, moving up her body. I take her mouth and kiss her until we both have no air.

“I missed you.” She sighs, opening her eyes. “I missed this. Your touch, your kisses.”

“I missed you every damn minute I was away from you,” I growl into her ear. I belong to you, you understand?”

“Yes. Always.”

“I need to be inside you, baby,” I express, nipping at her ear. She reaches for my cock and strokes it, arching her warm smooth body to touch mine. “Do you want that?”

“Yes,” she demands, gliding her lips across my cheek and scratching her nails across my back. I gaze down at her brown hair tangled all around her stunning face, her red swollen lips, her ravenous eyes and her starving body. She’s begging for me, and I’m damn well going to give it to her. I can’t resist her.