"Wallowing? Hog? I can't believe you're talking to me this way. I thought you were my friend." She swung her feet over the side of the bed and pointed at me. "You call it wallowing?" She liked the word so much she repeated it. "Wallowing? You have no idea what I went through so you...."
"I don't? Really? Are you so sure you're the only one this has happened to? Really? Well, you're wrong." I moved some clothes off the chair and made myself comfortable, while she worked to process that information. When she did her lips formed a big zero.
"You still have no right to come into my home and say those things."
"Doesn't look like anyone else is gonna say them. Even though they're tired of the wallowing also. What that bastard did to you was horrible to the extreme. What Clint did to him in return was too good for him." Actually he took the guy into the next town, tied him to a light pole, cut him just enough to bleed a bit, then put some wind chimes (my idea) over his head and went far enough away to watch the show, safely. When the walkers found him he started screaming and was still screaming while Clint drove out of town. "But it's over, he's dead, you're not. It's time to heal and go on living."
"Just that easy. Heal and go on living. I can't, JD, I've tried. Every moment of every day I feel him breathing in my ear and his erection against my backside and the promised of what he'd do to me repeating over and over in my mind. He keeps tormenting me day after day after day."
"Then you're letting him win. You're giving him permission to do it day after day. You're encouraging him to torment you and I thought you had more grit than that. I'm sorry I was wrong." I stood and brushed off my pants. She'd teared up at that last statement and was in full sob mode. "Get out!" she screamed, "Get out! How dare you come to my house and talk to me that way. I never want to see your face again." That hurt more than I thought it would, but she was finally crying and I knew that was the first step to healing. As I approached the door, Clint came rushing in and seeing Mercy ran to her and held her. " I hate you and your selfish ways. Wallowing, Clint, she said I was wallowing." Then she dissolved into a lump as Clint held her and rocked her gently. I left the house and climbed aboard the grader where I waited for Mason.
He arrived in a hurry and we left as fast as a road grader could go. We didn't speak out loud because of the engine noise but he read my mind and what I did to Mercy and he agreed she would get better now. She'd been coddled and not allowed to cry but now there wouldn't be any stopping her till she got it out of her system. She'll forgive me in time, I hope.
I was wondering about how safe it would be fishing in that lake west of us. It has a nice dock and I think there should be a boat somewhere in the area. I'm hungry for fish.
Damn, that's a good idea. And casting out is good for the shoulder. I'll get right on it. If we get a boat on the lake we should be safe enough. I don't think the walkers know how to swim. Let's check it out with Dukes toy then give it a try. I think it would be safer than fighting our way out of a nuclear facility.
Don't I know it. We can plan for the next trip to town. I thought we'd go west this time. We'd avoided it before because of the militia, but they have been eliminated so we should check it out. Lets talk to the others.
We came to the gate and parked the grader near the entrance, walked through the gate and got on the four wheeler Flynn had parked nearby. "Hey, knucklehead, we were just talking about going fishing."
"Hell ya," Flynn said, "A fish fry would be just the thing. We could invite Valley East over, I bet they'd love some fish, and it'd be just the incentive to get Mercy out of the house. It would do her good."
Mason and I looked at each other but didn't say anything. I hoped she would come out of it in the next few days but wouldn't bet on it.
When we explained to Duke what we wanted to do, it didn't take him long to get his helicopter in the air. He had a crowd of men, playing with him so they'd be impossible to communicate with for awhile. I moseyed into the kitchen and checked out lunch then ventured to the back porch where my day began.
I'd no sooner sat and started admiring my valley when I heard a loud Bang! A walker had fallen off the cliff landing on the roof of the new mill.
Mason, a walker just fell of the cliff. We have to do something about this.
Men came at a run, sounding like a stampede approaching from around the lodge. By the time the walker was upright again he didn't take another step before three shots rang out and it went down. It was a testament to the regularity of this that I just sat there and didn't get up and run screaming into the lodge. Then the guys did rock, paper, scissors to determine who got to haul the body off. This has been a regular occurrence since the fire. We needed to get a load of boards and build a fence up there, soon. Duke had made a 'walker falling' sign and put it on the new building but all fun aside we needed to do something...soon.
The next trip to town included a semi load of boards. The mill needed them and we need more to finish the greenhouse. It was nearly the end of July which meant summer was nearly over. We needed to get whatever we had to do, done, soon because snow can fly anytime in Montana especially in the mountains. Fishing was just a stress reliever and one that was badly needed. Duke, for one, hadn't been off the place since we arrived 13 months ago, Sarah either for that matter, so before the winter set in, the people who have been lodge bound were getting away. Period. I didn't think there would be any arguing. Except maybe for Lacy, she hated fishing. Something about 'a fine line between standing on the shore looking stupid and fishing.' Very funny.
I heard a door close and looked up to find Sarah. Oh Oh. She spied me and smiled. I spent the remainder of the afternoon peeling potatoes. I hoped my hand healed soon. I looked up once and saw Mason hanging the new curtains for the dining room. There was a half dozen windows in there so he'd be at it for a while. He saw me looking and shrugged his shoulders, grimacing slightly. I winked back him and we continued with our therapy.
I got to go fishing because...well...it was my idea. Lacy, Melody and baby Davy with Flynn stayed behind. They weren't interested in fishing. OK. I won't hold it against them. Duke dragged Sarah and Mandy along saying if he had to go so did they. He had to go. We took the four wheelers and the mule which seated six. The drive there was the most invigorating rides of my life. Hiking would take over two hours and the elevation of 1400 feet it was tiring to say the least. There's several creek crossings and a one mile loop that was unavoidable but mostly the trail stays close to the cascading water of the creek. The smell of pine was heavy in the air and surrounded by snow capped mountains and trees that rustled when the breeze tickled the leaves just plain made me smile.
We saw several deer with their young chasing butterfly's through the tall grass. At one point we saw a black bear but it was heading the other direction so we weren't worried. We each had bear spray and we were making enough noise to wake the dead, so a bear wasn't bothering me a bit. When we finally caught sight of the cabin I was ready. I knew the fishing equipment was inside so I offered to clear it while the guys checked to make sure the boats were sea worthy.
Not killing any walkers today, I thought, as I stepped outside and motioned to them it was clear. I found some things that would make great gifts (Yep, I'm Christmas shopping again) and planned to stick em in my back pack before we left. Finding the fishing gear I wanted, I wandered outside to see how the boats were coming. I was ready. Now.
"What's that?" Mandy said. Those two words had the same effect as on me as Run! so I dropped everything, grabbed my bow and twirled in circles. About six of us were twirling like a dancers in a production of Swan Lake, looking for the 'That' Mandy indicated when I faced the direction she pointed. It was a walker and one I knew in it's previous life. Old Man Robertson ran the cabin during every summer I was here. He was a crotchety, old, grumpy man, but likeable, even though he discouraged it. He lumbered towards us, naked as the day he was born. Sarah grabbed Mandy and ran inside the cabin but before she could close the door, Duke had dispatched the old man into a small ravine near an outhouse. I looked at Duke and he shrugged then went inside to get his family.
Mason said, "I hate it when she says that." I grinned cause I've said it more often than I was happy with.
"Can we go fishing now? I didn't come here to talk." Howard said, getting into his boat that already held Sam and Bubba. Me, Mason and Ken took another boat and the rest of the crew divided the rest of the boats between them. There were several paddle boats for the non fishermen and a couple of kayaks and inside of 30 minutes we were scattered about on the lake. I divided my time between taking pictures for Lacy and catching some of the biggest Golden Trout I've ever seen.
It seemed however, that Howard was the fisherman of the day. We spent some time cleaning our catch then after pilfering the cabin for Christmas gifts, I loaded my tired, happy self into one of the four wheelers and we headed home. The ride back was just as exciting as it was several hours before. I saw a raspberry patch and we stopped for several minutes then I found a whole acre of chokecherries that would be wonderful come the end of August. We'd make another trip up here before the summer was gone, if not for the fish, for the berries that grew wild.
We arrived home, tired, excited and everyone wanted to talk at once. Lacy had fixed supper and the smell welcomed us in. I helped get the dining room ready for supper then we sat and talked for hours. Nothing had happened at the Lodge while we were gone although I thought Melody had a certain glow to her and Flynn looked much more relaxed. Aw.
"Clint called while you were gone." Flynn said.
"Really? What's up." Mason asked.
"Not much really except Mercy is doing better. She joined them for supper. I told them we were planning a fish fry Sunday and invited them over."
"Good. What did he say."
"Said they were all looking forward to it. He said to tell JD that they 'all' were looking forward to it. Didn't make any sense to me but I figured you know."
Mason looked at me and smiled. I was smiling so big my cheeks hurt.
"Yep," I said. "I know."
Chapter 19
The fish fry was a blast. Mercy and I were back to normal. We ate fish and potato salad until I thought I would be sick. The guys set up a horseshoe game and the kids ran all over the place, followed closely by a small dog whose tongue was hanging out but refused to quit. The stars were out in full force and we were able to see the northern lights. Duke was happy about that cause he was having trouble with his electronics lately. Now he knew why.
It was a tired bunch that went to bed late that night. We had plans the following weekend to go berry picking. Alan, one of the new guys, had seen some honey bees and planned to locate the hive to grab some honey. Mason paid particular attention to me that night but I have to admit, I encouraged him all day. That man was nearly crazed by the time we went to bed.
Morning had me up early. I wanted to talk to Duke and Ken about branching out and seeing if we could find others surviving like us. It almost became an obsession with me once I'd thought of it. I found out that Mason, George and Lacy were getting the same ideas. What is that saying about brilliant minds thinking alike? Hmm.
"I have enough fuel to make a trip around up north a bit, say up to Helena then west a bit around to Anaconda and back. If I see anything I can radio back."
"Why don't we make some fliers and drop them. Include our sat phone number and directions to the place that kind of thing."
"That's a good idea, I'll get on it right now. Then we can all check it over before Ken leaves."
"I wanted to talk to you guys about alternate living arrangements". When I got a lot of blank stares, I smiled. "I mean a place we can go to if we have to. Right now, we have pooled every single resource we have into one place. This one. After living in a world where there is no such thing as zombies to zombies everywhere, I realized we can't live secluded anymore. I'm uncomfortable not having a place we can go if we need to that's all."
"I think I see what you're saying." Mason said. "How many attempts have been made to acquire this place. Yes, we've defended it but what if there comes a time when we can't? Where do we go? Do we just start over again? How?"
"Lord, I hadn't thought of that." Sarah muttered.
"I agree, and the thought crossed my mind the last time someone tried to break in. What happens when they decide the place isn't worth it to them and just blow us out of the valley simply because they couldn't have it? It's definitely something to think about."
"I'll be ready to fly whenever anyone else is. After the fire, I've been fueled up just in case. Get your fliers ready and if we have any extra sat phones it might be good to drop them too in case no one else has one. Maybe a package with a small parachute. I don't know how many cause I don't know what I'll find. Can you give me some idea what I'm looking for?"
"Well, I'd say look for a place with a water source, wind turbines, near enough to a town or city by far enough in the mountains. Make it the mountains or a nice valley, not flat land. There's no protection from the wind in the winter on flat land. Follow the rivers. I'll take a look at the information I have on springs. A large building and some outbuildings would be great. If I think of anything else, I'll let ya know."