Wake Me In The Future (17 page)

The highly varnished oak table in front of the large open fireplace gave us a ringside view of the dancing flames that burnt the logs and bathed the immediate area, including us, in a warm golden glow; it couldn’t have been more comfortable.

‘Have you got any other family besides John and David then?’ I asked when I returned from the bar with our drinks. These were her two younger brothers that were at Player school at the same time we'd attended.

‘Yes,’ she said sipping the white wine spritzer I'd placed in front of her, ‘I’ve got another three older brothers, and all five of them have tried out for one or the other of the local football clubs,’ and she winked at me, ‘that’s why I am one of those rare women who like football.’

Tick one against my wish list for the perfect woman
, I thought. In fact, it turned out Helen had lots of interests that were considered to be men’s pursuits, and she put it down to being surrounded by men at home. I didn’t care where she’d acquired her interests, only that she was rapidly ticking all the boxes on my, so far, unrealistic list. She loved Science Fiction, which was my passion, often joking that I wouldn’t watch anything unless it had a space ship in it. She was also into gadgets and had the latest CD player and even a home computer! I started to think she was having me on. What man wouldn’t want this! I looked up to the oak beams that supported the ceiling,
thank you God,
I thought.

‘So what was it that you thought would put me off then? The fact you like a lot of things that men do?’

‘Oh no!’ she shifted in her seat, ‘in fact those things get me a lot of interest from men.’

That deflated me,
I bet they do,
I thought.

‘No, it’s my strong feelings about the way society is changing and the impact on all of us. A lot of people prefer not to think about it, or believe there’s a problem at all.’

‘What do you mean?’

And that was it for the next two hours. Helen spewed out a torrent of feelings about how services were being run down because they didn’t make money and how basic human decency was being eroded for the sake of profit.

‘Society is slowly being destroyed by the markets Richard. The values of some basic aspects of our lives are becoming irrelevant, simply because they don’t have a monetary value. Only making or saving money seems to matter nowadays.’

I actually didn’t see anything out of the ordinary in these views, coming from a poor background it was a familiar concern for most people I knew. I supposed in the richer circles that Helen’s family moved in, she probably sounded like a raving socialist.

‘What sort of things do you mean?’

‘Well, look how we’re losing the services we used to take for granted. They’re simply withdrawn to save money or charged for to make more. And everything’s done on the cheap and the market people then employ tactics to promote any change that benefits them, and make people feel as if everyone is in favour of it. That then puts peer pressure on everyone who doesn’t agree, to keep their concerns to themselves. Money is power Richard and they have enough of it to change our world completely. And nothing is going to stand in their way, not public decency, children’s innocence or basic human values.’

She’d looked around and leaned closer to me lowering her voice, conspiratorially. ‘I’ve even heard that in America they’re developing urinals for women – I mean, how disgusting, and why – because it’s cheaper than providing the privacy of a proper toilet.’

‘Men have always used urinals,’ I added, desperately trying to contribute to the conversation.

‘That’s because you’re able to stand up and relieve yourself,’ but even those have changed Richard. Men used to have porcelain partitions between them for privacy and hygiene, but do you have them now?’ she demanded.

‘Well....not always.’

‘Exactly, and you’ll get even less as the years go on. And do you think it cost more to remove them or less?’ she answered for him, ‘No, there are no partitions between men’s urinals for privacy or hygiene anymore because it saves money, and they’re the exact things that men’s pride won’t let them demand. Can you imagine any man publicly admitting that he’d like those things? No, your natural arrogance – sorry Richard – is being played on. They know damn well that no man in his right mind would ever open himself up to ridicule by asking for that type of thing.’

‘Why would any real man want those sorts of things though?’
Oops
, I thought, even as it came out of my mouth.

‘The same reason all the men in the past wanted, and expected them. A little thing called dignity Richard or do you think that all the men that came before this generation were all inferior in some way?’

Quickly
, I thought, I don’t want this to turn into an argument. I didn’t have any strong feelings on the matter either way anyway, so I decided I’d better go with the flow.

‘No, you’re right; it’s just that it’s what we’ve become used to.’

‘And that’s where you’ve hit the nail on the head,’ she said, more animated now, ‘we can all get used to anything if the pressure is right and if we’re exposed to something enough. We’re just losing sight of what’s being taken away from us. I mean at this rate there’ll be no partitions in the sit down loos soon. If you think of it logically, when savings or making money is concerned, it’s beneficial to remove all aspects of our privacy and decency because to cater for them costs money.

The next thing they’ll want to bring in will be communal toilets, that they’ll portray to us as something modern, good and liberating, something we should embrace. They’ll pressurise us to accept them as a wonderfully modern concept. It’s so easy to fool younger people like us Richard. All you have to do is portray the thing you want to change as something that belongs to the older generation, and you can guarantee that most people of our age will accept it. We never consider that what we're giving up is something that generations of young people like us fought so hard to gain in the first place.'

‘Don’t you think this is all a bit extreme?’ I said trying to calm her down ‘I’ll go and get another drink shall I?’ I wanted to get away from talking about toilets; it was making me feel uncomfortable.

When I got back from the bar I sat down, looked at her and said, ‘Wow, you really are bothered about this stuff aren’t you?’

‘I am sorry for that; I’ve frightened you off now. Getting on my soapbox and ranting away.’

‘No, no,’ I interjected, ‘it’s interesting. I never thought of life that way. I just go along with things, and to be honest I am easily led. One of life’s sheep I suppose. Of course what you’re saying is obvious, and we do let things be taken away from us, but what can we do? I am not the sort of person who joins rallies and goes out protesting.’

‘I wouldn’t ask you to do that. I don’t myself. I am just as guilty as everyone else of inaction. I suppose I am waiting for someone to take the lead and I’ll follow, just like one of the sheep that you think you are. I mean I wouldn’t want a revolution or anything. I don’t like violence. I prefer evolution. But in this case I feel so strongly, I am sure I would go out on the street if others did.’

‘Have you never thought of being a politician?’ I stupidly asked, setting her off on another tirade.

‘They don’t represent us Richard. Just because some of them come from similar backgrounds to us doesn’t mean they stay grounded. I really wish we had the power to reveal, in exact detail, just how wealthy every single politician is. Then we’d know who they represent from the general population. The most important thing that defines us in our modern world now isn’t our colour, religion or sex, or any one of those other groups that they tell us are under-represented in parliament. No, it’s our financial status that defines us all now, and if we want politicians to reflect us they have to reflect us economically. No Richard, our Parliament doesn’t represent the people anymore, if it ever did. Every single one of them, whatever minority they belong to and how ever poor a background they originally came from, is wealthy enough to buffer themselves from the main problems the majority of us have to deal with every single day.’

At this point I really thought that Helen needed to calm down, all this was exhausting me, and these weren’t even my views. I thought this would be a good time to contribute a little more, but just as I was about to go on to tell her about an article I’d read on the expenses paid to politicians, she revved up yet again.

‘The problem now is that people are becoming desensitised to everything that can be used to make money. Sex, violence, nudity, crudity, disrespect, vulgarity, all these things have become money making. I tell you Richard it won’t be long before it’s acceptable for little kids to see all sorts of sex and violence. That’ll really mess with their minds, stealing their childhood and then god knows how they’ll grow up.’

‘I don’t think that will ever be allowed Helen, I mean kids are protected from that type of thing on TV, and Movies have ratings so parents can make sensible choices. They’d never allow kids to have access to that sort of stuff; it would be like allowing child abuse.’

‘I am not so sure,’ she said contemplatively and looking into her glass, ‘I saw something on TV this afternoon that would never have been shown a few years ago. They said it was
educational,
but I’d bet money that ninety per cent of the audience didn’t watch it for educational purposes. I mean, how long before they can broadcast any and every sexually explicit image you can imagine and every violent act and personal tragedy is scrutinised by everyone under the guise of public interest and education?’

I couldn’t think of what to say to this as she just carried on.

‘Murders, executions, operations, autopsies, the list goes on. They don’t care about the suffering it causes anyone, as long as they can make money out of it. We’ve just got it all wrong Richard. No wonder so much of the world hates our Western ideals and values. I don’t even think we have any anymore, when greed is our god? It’s not surprising that so many of our own citizens are attracted to other cultures, where common decency and respect come before fame and fortune. It feels like we’re shedding all the civilised aspects of our society and eventually you won’t be able to tell us from the basest animals that we evolved from.’

I thought that was a bit harsh, and I was unaware that my mouth was gaping wide open at this outpouring of frustration, at what Helen saw as unacceptable change.

‘I know what you think Richard, that I am just a 'sensitive' woman and what I am going on about won’t ever come to pass, but because I am conscious of these things I am more aware of them happening around me. And I am convinced we’re going to end up with a dysfunctional generation of citizens terrorising the rest of society, and how will they bring their kids up? God it’s just one horrible spiral, to who knows where?’

She took a sip of her drink and sighed, ‘I’d love children one day, but what sort of life would they have. It’s an absolute nightmare to someone like me who values privacy but who’s constantly exposed to all of this intrusion and social experimentation. I just want us all to have some respect for each other and conduct ourselves with some decency in public. Do you think that’s too much to wish for?’

‘No.’ was all I was able to say as I thought of the dirty books I’d got at home and blushed. Perhaps this wasn’t going to turn out like I’d hoped for after all.

‘Do you know I refuse to go swimming now as a protest because the local authorities have taken away the private changing cubicles? It’s just one communal room now and no doubt once they can get away with it we’ll have mixed sex changing.’

She hadn’t noticed my red face so I decided to participate in the conversation before she did. ‘You know you can really wind yourself up thinking about this too much Helen. You’ve admitted it yourself, there’s nothing you can do about it.’

‘I know that Richard,’ she sounded deflated, ‘but it just makes me angry when I do think about it. It seems like some people want to break up everything that represents our modern civilisation. All those centuries of sacrifice and fighting by countless generations of young people to get these rights and they're now being trashed by a few power hungry, greedy businessmen, who only really represent a rich minority.’

She looked silently into her glass, before saying, ‘I sometimes wish I could do what Little God tells me.’

‘Little God?’ Oh wow, I was seriously getting worried now, and I jokingly looked around for the door.

She laughed, ‘don’t worry I am not going completely mad, it’s just the name I’ve given to that voice in everyone’s head that tells them how they’d change the world if they had the power to enforce their own views on everyone. You know - the one that starts ‘if it was up to me…’

I smiled back. ’Does that mean that all those dictators and tyrants around the world are the ones that actually get the chance to act out what their Little Gods tell them then?’

She didn’t answer, but looked at me then, as if realising for the first time how she must be coming across, and probably because of my red face she blurted, ‘Blimey, Richard I can’t believe I’ve just said all those things. They've been going around in my head for ages, but I’ve never been able to express them before, and never really felt like I could say those things to anyone. Somehow I feel comfortable enough with you to vent it all. But I must have blown my chances now; I bet you must think I am a right nutter.’

‘Yep,’ I smiled again and reaching for her hand I said, ‘but a very lovable one.’

Her smile had brightened her face, ‘I promise I won’t rant and rave all the time, I just needed to get that out of my system, and don’t get me wrong, I am no puritan crusader, I’d never let my Little God control me. I don’t believe in banning people from doing whatever they want in the privacy of their homes, or in groups with like minded people, I’d just like people to behave in a decent manner when out in public, and respect their fellow citizens.’

‘You can rant and rave as much as you like,’ I said, feeling a lot better about my adult magazines after that last statement, ‘I agree with everything you said. I just haven’t thought about it before. Like I said I am just a sheep and never question anything.’ And I added, ‘Perhaps that’s something you can teach me to do? I’d really like to see you again Helen, you haven’t changed your mind about going out with me have you?’