Wait Until Midnight (15 page)

"Adam, I'm so sorry. What did you do? How did you survive?"

"My mother had taught me to read and write, but I had also received another sort of education growing up on the streets in this neighborhood. It had begun to come in handy before Mother died. It kept me fed and paid the rent after she was gone."

"How did you make a living?"

"I bought and sold other people's secrets," he said simply. "I don't understand"

^"
Remember Maud Gatley? The opium addict whose diary I am trying to recover?"

"Yes, of course."

He angled his chin toward the door. "She was a prostitute who lived across the hall. She frequently brought her clients upstairs to her room. Occasionally some of her customers whispered their secrets to her and she, in turn, told them to me."

`And you found a market for them?" she asked, incredulous.

His smile was cold. "There is a vast and lucrative market for secrets, especially when those secrets belong to gentlemen from the better social circles."

"I hadn't realized that."

"Maud was very beautiful in those days and she had not yet fallen completely under the spell of the drug. She counted a number of men of the Quality among her clientele. It was my job to find buyers for the gossip and rumors she picked up in the course of her work. We split the profits. The arrangement worked well for both of us for some time."

A rush of wonder swept through her. "Yours is an amazing story."

He raised one brow. "I am glad you find it intriguing. But I warn you, if a single word of it appears in one of your novels, I will be very displeased."

She gave him her most demure look. "I would, of course, change the names"

"A change of names would not be nearly enough to placate me," he warned.

"I was only teasing, Adam, as I'm sure you are well aware. Tell me the rest of the tale."

"Over the course of the next few years I acquired two sisters and a brother"

"How does one
acquire
siblings?
^"
she asked.

"It varies. Sometimes one finds an orphan who is about to be auctioned off in a brothel that caters to gentlemen who prefer virgin girls under the age of twelve"

"Dear heaven"

"Sometimes one finds a girl abandoned at the age of three next to a pile of trash and sweepings."

"Adam, are you telling me—"

"Sometimes one finds a boy who, at the age of four, has been set out beneath a streetlamp to beg but whose parent never came back for him."

"You took them all in to live with you," she whispered. "I do not know what to say. I am quite stunned"

He shrugged. "I was making good money on the streets in those days. I could afford to feed a few extra mouths. It made for company in the evenings."

"Did you teach them to read and write as your mother had taught you?"

"There wasn't much else to do at night," he said.

She waved one hand to indicate the spare little room. "How did the four of you escape this place?"

"The situation changed in the middle of my seventeenth year. I came into possession of a particularly valuable secret. It involved a large-scale financial swindle that affected a number of high-ranking investors. I sold the information to a new client, a wealthy, widowed gentleman. He used it to prevent himself and several associates from losing a great deal of money"

"Go on," she said, fascinated.

Instead of answering immediately, he straightened away from the wall, unfolded his arms and crossed the room to the fireplace. Going down on one knee, he struck a light and ignited the kindling.

He watched the small blaze take hold for a moment or two. She got the impression that he was reviewing scenes from the past and deciding which ones to reveal.

"The wealthy gentleman had lost his wife and children to a terrible fever several years previously," he said finally. "The gentleman was very rich but quite alone in the world. After the two of us had done some business together over the course of several months, he went so far as to offer me a position as a sort of unofficial man-of-business."

"You were only seventeen years of age. What sort of tasks did you perform for him?"

"As I told you, my mentor was very fond of secrets of all kinds and I had a talent for collecting them. I got them not just from Maud but from others who were in a position to learn them." Adam rose slowly. "Tavern keepers, chambermaids, footmen, hairdressers, washerwomen, men who work on the docks. The list of people who are in a position to provide useful information about others is endless."

"I see." She sank down onto the edge of the cot.

"My client's attitude toward me became almost paternal. He not only gave me a fine position, he offered to let me live in his great house. I told him that I could not leave my brother and sisters." Adam shook his head reminiscently. "So
Wilson took us all in to live with him."

"It sounds as if you and your siblings filled up a portion of the empty space in his heart that had no doubt been created by the loss of his own family."

"He said something very much like that to me once a few years ago. It was his idea to claim us all as long-lost relatives. It was a bold scheme. I told him it would never work. But he had the power to put it into effect. He hired tutors, dancing instructors and a long list of experts to give us all a proper education and put a polish on us. In the end he made us the heirs to his fortune"

"What a fascinating series of startling incidents," she exclaimed.

"Perhaps it sounds that way in the telling, but I assure you, it did not feel that way while we were living through those incidents."

"No, of course not," she said gently: "So much sadness and loss. So much uncertainty and danger. Believe me, sir, I comprehend very well that your life does not feel like a work of fiction to you. I am honored by your confidence. I will not betray it."

He watched her very steadily. "If I had not believed that I could trust you, I would never have told you about my past."

"I think I can guess what is in that diary that you are trying to recover. It is the truth about your past and the pasts of your brother and sisters, correct?"

"Yes. Maud knew the facts. She evidently wrote them down in her journal. Elizabeth Delmont read that journal and tried to use the information to blackmail me"

"No wonder you wish to recover that diary."

"
Wilson assures me that our family is sufficiently powerful to be able to deal with any scandal that may erupt. He is right. But I fear it will not be as simple as he believes. Julia is the Countess of Southwood. She has her husband to protect her. But Jessica is on the verge of making her debut into the Polite World. Who knows what kind of gossip she would face if it got out that she had been found in a heap of trash?"

"Scandal is always hard to handle. It would be especially difficult for a young woman who is facing all of the pressures that must come with moving into elevated social circles."

"As for Nathan, he is drawn to the world of academic writing and study. In order to pursue his interests he will find it necessary to join certain exclusive scholarly societies. I suspect he will not be readily accepted into them if it is discovered that he was once put out to beg on the streets."

"Naturally you wish to protect your brother and sisters. I am lost in admiration of your noble nature and determination to protect your family."

His mouth curved ruefully. "It is certainly true that I am determined to shield my family as much as possible, but there is nothing noble about my intention. It is my responsibility to protect them."

She nodded. "Of course you would see it that way."

"You are the one who commands my admiration, Caroline"

She was taken aback by the seriousness of his tone.

"Forgive me, but I was under the impression that you did not think highly of the manner in which I make my living." He ignored that. "You have survived a great deal of loss and many difficulties yet you have triumphed resoundingly
^"
"I could not have done it alone," she said quietly. "If I had not had Aunt Emma and Aunt Milly, my life would have taken an entirely different turn, I assure you."

"Just as mine would have done had it not been for Wilson Grendon. But that does not lessen your own accomplishments. You have overcome a great scandal, and you have people who love you and to whom you are loyal. You have used your creativity and intelligence to craft an interesting career for yourself. All of those things add up to a great triumph, Caroline.
^"

She did not know what to say. She could feel herself turning warm. No man had ever complimented her in such a touching, sincere manner. She knew that he meant every word.

And yet, she thought wistfully, those were not quite the sentiments that she wanted to hear from him.

"Very kind of you to say so," she managed in her most formal tones.

"You asked me why I brought you here tonight.
^"
He walked toward her. "I told myself that it was because I had more or less coerced you into revealing some of your own secrets and that it was only right to reciprocate. But that is not the whole of it"

The atmosphere in the room changed in some indefinable way, becoming more intimate and close. A deep sense of knowing swept through her, bringing her to her feet. Something important was happening between them, she realized.

When he reached her, he raised both hands and cradled her face between them.

"The truth is that I wanted you to know that I am not the man you believed me to be that first day when I descended on you in your study and tried to intimidate you into giving me information."

"I see." She could not think of anything else to say. She was so aware of the heat and power in his hands that she could scarcely draw breath, let alone form coherent sentences.

"I realize that I may strike you as merely another selfish, arrogant member of the privileged class. And I will admit that these days I move in those circles. But I was not born into them, Caroline. I wear the right clothes, belong to the right clubs and do business with the right people, but deep down, I will always be an outsider. I know that, even if those with whom I associate do not"

She lifted her hands and clasped his wrists. "I under-stand."

"I brought you here because I wanted you to comprehend that I do know what it is like to struggle and fight very hard to survive. Indeed, I have done things to achieve those goals that would shock you to the core of your soul."

"I cannot believe that."

"Believe it," he said harshly. "I will not burden you with those secrets. But what I want you to understand tonight is that I have not forgotten the lessons I learned while I lived in this room. I will never forget them. They are part of who and what I have become"

She sighed. "You may be arrogant. You are certainly strong-willed, even stubborn on occasion. But I am well aware that you are not one of those men who would take advantage of a woman, use her for your own selfish purposes and then call down shame and scandal upon her head when you have finished with her."

He tightened his hands very gently, tipping her head back a little. "Can I gather from that statement that you no longer believe that I am a threat to you and your aunts?"

"You would not destroy the three of us on a whim or a mere suspicion. I know now that you are a man who will settle only for the truth."

She felt some of the fierce tension in him ease. He stroked one thumb along the under edge of her lower lip.

"Thank you for that much," he whispered roughly. "Out of curiosity, what was it that made you conclude that I could be trusted?"

She wrinkled her nose. "If you must know, my intuition told me as much right from the start of this business, even though you gave me a false name. Logic and common sense held me back, of course"

"Of course," he agreed.

"There were others to be considered besides myself," she reminded him.

"Emma and Milly."

"Precisely. This evening, however, I feared that in your anger toward Mrs. Toller you might take the risk of trying to expose her prematurely. I did not want to be responsible for jeopardizing your investigation."

"So you told me one of your secrets"

"Yes."

"And now I have told you a few of mine." His gaze softened and heated like green glass in a furnace. "But there is another secret that I would confide in you tonight" Anticipation sparkled and shivered through her. "What is that?"

He stroked the bones of her cheeks with his thumbs. "Although the fact that you are not a widow makes this situation extremely inconvenient, I am very glad to know that you are not mourning a lost love that you hope is waiting for you with open arms on the Other Side"

"Why does that matter so much to you?"

"Because I want to kiss you again more than I have wanted to do anything in my life and I did not relish competing with a ghost."

"Oh, yes. Yes,
please."

He took her mouth with a fierce hunger that swamped her senses. She would have crumpled beneath the delicious onslaught had he not held her tightly against his chest.

The kiss burned through her, hot and intoxicating. But she was beyond all caution.

`Adam,' she whispered, when he briefly freed her mouth.

"So passionate and so lovely." He kissed one of her brows and moved his hands intimately down her spine.

She put her arms around his neck and brushed her mouth tentatively against his, testing his reaction.

The delicate caress seemed to electrify him. He groaned and kissed her back, his mouth hard and urgent now.

A moment later she felt his fingers on the fastenings at the front of her gown. The stiffened bodice, which did double duty as a light corset, opened slowly like a suit of armor being severed down the centerline.

"I do not know how women tolerate these modern fashions," he said hoarsely. "Wearing a dress like this must be akin to walking around in a small, tight cage"

"But it feels so good when the cage is removed:' she said earnestly. As soon as the words were out of her mouth, she was mortified. "Oh, dear, that did not come out quite as I had intended."