Wait for Me (17 page)

“No.” His tone was cold and impassive, his eyes fixed out the window toward their kids.

She stood. “Well, we must have had one hell of a marriage if this is any indication. What on God’s green earth ever convinced me to marry you in the first place?”

“I hate to bust your bubble, babe, but we’re
still
married.”

“You don’t have to remind me.” She was well aware of that fact now more than ever, and the reality of it was the only thing that made her rein in her emotions. “Look, Ryan, I know this is hard for you. I understand what you’re going through, even if I can’t relate. I’ve tried to put myself in your shoes a hundred times, and I can’t. But it doesn’t mean I don’t care.”

She wished he’d look at her, but he just kept staring out that damn window. “I’m not going to lie to you. There’s something about you that…intrigues me. Although what it is, I have no clue. You’re obnoxious, obtuse, rude and cold. And every time I’m around you, I’m reminded of those facts. You’re living up to your heartless reputation, Mr. Harrison.”

The look he sent her could have turned flesh to stone. She knew from his reaction what she’d said had hit its mark, so she softened her tone when she added, “And even with all that, I’m still at a loss, because even though I may not have memories, I can still feel things. Yesterday at the park, it was like an odd sense of déjà vu. I recognized something about being close to you. And I felt something I haven’t felt before. But I don’t know what it means. I don’t know if it’s just recognition of something we once shared, or if it’s something pushing me toward you. And frankly, at this moment, I can’t even think about it. I don’t even want to.”

She ran a hand over her hair. “I’m overwhelmed. I have to think about Reed and what’s best for him. And how to get Julia not to hate my guts. And what the hell I’m supposed to tell my parents when they show up.” She massaged her throbbing scar. “It’s more than I can handle. And I can’t even begin to focus on you until I get some of those things worked out first. I don’t want to hurt you any more than I already have, but I can’t lie to you and tell you that I didn’t have feelings for Jake or pretend like the last year and a half with him didn’t happen, because it did. Neither of us can change that. All we can do is try to make things easier for the kids from here on out.”

He was so quiet and still, she half expected him to explode at any second.

“I can accept that,” he finally said. “The kids are a priority for me too.”

He set his beer on the counter and stalked toward her. “But you accept this. I’m not that patient. I’ve been through five years of hell while you’ve been off having a life. I’m not going to just sit back and let you figure everything else out first and put me on the back burner until you’re ready to deal with me.”

He moved closer, and she stepped back until her feet hit the wall. His face was only inches from hers, his breath warming her skin, causing a trickle of awareness to course through her. She smelled the soap from his shower, felt the heat radiating from his body. And had a sudden, wicked, insane urge to wrap her hand around his neck and pull his mouth down to hers.

Which was off the charts
insane
.

“You’re just gonna have to deal with me now,” he said in husky voice. “Right along with everything else.”

Those sapphire gems were full of rolling emotions. Emotions and heat and need and challenge. A challenge something deep inside told her she’d faced before.

Instead of grabbing his face and taking a taste of that mouth as her body suddenly wanted her to do, she poked his chest with one hard index finger. “And you’re just going to have to grow up, Harrison. This isn’t all about you. I’m doing the best I can. I’m trying to be sensitive to your needs and Julia’s feelings. Nothing’s easy. For any of us.”

Frustration and anger and loss and fear welled up and overtook her. She curled her fingers into the front of his shirt, moved in until she was close enough to take that taste, but now didn’t want it so much. She was too damned pissed. He wasn’t the only one who could be a jerk when they were hurting.

“And remember this,” she added. “I’m here because I want to be here. I didn’t have to come looking for you. And there’s nothing making me stay except me. So suck it up and deal with it, just like I’m dealing with you.”

She released his shirt with a push, barely enough to move him. But Ryan took a step back anyway. And when he stared at her, his eyes glittered with a mix of shock and anger and, she could swear, a touch of admiration. Admiration that sent a thrill straight to her belly.

Strange yet familiar sexual sparks flared between them. Sparks that told her they’d had this argument before. Not this exact one, but this face-off. This sexually charged confrontation. She didn’t need memories to know the chemistry between them was combustible. She could feel it. Could feel it had always been combustible. But unlike arguments of the past, this one wouldn’t end in sweaty, sexy, passionate sex. She wouldn’t let it.

After everything she’d already been through, she wasn’t setting herself up to get burned again. Especially not by a man like Ryan Harrison.

She stepped past him and headed out into the backyard.

Chapter Eleven

“Don’t worry.” Mitch squeezed Kate’s knee as she leaned against the side of his desk in his home office. “They’re not going to freak out.”

She raised her brow and crossed her arms.

A sly smirk tugged at his mouth. “Okay, they’ll freak a little. But not that much.”

“I still don’t know why I have to be here,” Kate said.

“Moral support.” He picked up the phone and dialed. “I’ve had to deal with them by myself for five years. It’s time you started pulling your weight again.”

He swiveled away and began speaking into the phone.

Kate glanced at Ryan, who was leaning against the doorjamb. She wanted to be outside with Simone and the kids, not shut up in here with Ryan and Mitch. “Is he always this pushy?”

“Pretty much,” Ryan said, crossing his arms over his chest.

“Did I used to like it?”

One side of his lips quirked up in a winsome smile. The first inkling of smile she’d seen on his face. “Not a bit. You pushed right back. Just like you did with me in the kitchen.”

She turned away from the way Ryan held her gaze, looked back to Mitch and tried to tamp down the thrill Ryan’s words sent through her body. Mitch was doing his best to explain the situation to his mother. A frown tugged at Kate’s mouth. “It doesn’t sound like it’s going well.”

“Mom,” Mitch said into the receiver, “I’m putting you on speaker.”

Kate’s eyes grew wide, and she nudged him with her knee and shook her head, but it didn’t stop him.

“Okay, Mom,” Mitch said, “we’re all here.”

The line was quiet. Then Kathy Mathews’s voice chirped through. “Is Ryan there?”

“I’m here, Kathy,” Ryan said, stepping into the room.

“Ryan, is he telling the truth, or is this one of his jokes? Because if he’s kidding on this one, he’s definitely out of the will. You got that, Mitch?”

Ryan glanced at Kate. “No, Kathy. He’s not kidding. She’s real.”

There was silence again. “Is…is she there?”

Kate glared at Mitch. Oh, he was in so much trouble for this. “I’m here, too. He’s not lying.”

The line seemed to go dead. Then they heard sobbing. Followed by Roger’s voice. Mitch picked up the handset, turned off the speakerphone, and patted Kate’s knee. He went through the story with his father a second time.

When Mitch hung up, he let out a deep breath. “They’re coming down tomorrow. I managed to convince them to give you a day instead of jumping on the first plane out of Sea-Tac.”

“Fabulous,” Kate muttered. “That was really sweet of you, by the way, throwing me under the bus like that. Remind me to return the favor.”

“You’ll feel better once you have some food. You always were a grump when your blood sugars dropped.” He pushed out of his chair and headed toward the kitchen.

Kate knew Ryan was still behind her. How, she wasn’t sure. She just sensed him. “How do you think they’re going to react to all of this when they get here?”

“They’ll be fine,” Ryan said. “They’re good people. I’d be sure Reed’s with you tomorrow when you see them, though. That’ll give you a buffer.”

“Good idea.” She looked his way. “Will you be there?”

“I think I’ll sit this one out. Mitch will be with you.”

She nodded. But why did that bother her?

“I guess this is the last big shocker for awhile,” she said quietly.

Ryan looked down at his feet. “Yeah, I guess so. I told my parents this morning. They’re coming down later in the week, but you don’t have to worry. They’ll want to see you, but they’re mostly coming down to see me and Julia, and to meet Reed.”

“Okay.” The whole conversation was just awkward. Meeting her parents, meeting her in-laws, it was bizarre. “Just let me know when they get here. I’ll bring Reed over.” She tried to read his thoughts. Couldn’t. Doubted she ever would. “Did they not like me?”

“What?”

“Your parents, did they not like me? It doesn’t sound like they’re overjoyed at the thought of seeing me again. Not like Mitch’s parents.” She frowned. “My parents.” It was still a hard idea to get used to. She actually had parents.

“Yeah, they liked you.” His voice turned soft, the tenderness in it tugging on her. “They loved you.” He shook his head. “They know this is awkward for me, for us. They don’t want to make you any more uncomfortable than you already are.”

No matter what anyone did or didn’t do, it was still uncomfortable. She didn’t know what to say in response. She desperately wanted to do something to make this better, though.

“Come on,” he said, breaking the silence before she could. “Let’s go get some food and see what the kids are doing.”

Thankful for the distraction, she followed him out into the kitchen, vaguely aware he was trying to keep the sarcasm and anger out of his voice. Since their moment in the kitchen, he’d been trying a lot harder to treat her with some sense of compassion, or at least with a little less hostility.

When they walked into the room, Mitch and Simone were working in the kitchen together, getting hamburger fixings ready to go, while Julia and Shannon set out chips and condiments. The girls had already struck up a fierce friendship. Reed just ran around getting in the way, like he was a regular fixture in the group. They looked normal. Like two families hanging out for a backyard barbecue.

It was only when you looked closer you saw it was just one giant mess.

The flickering lights of the TV in the corner of the room caught Kate’s attention. No one seemed to be noticing it, so she moved to turn it off, but her hand paused on the power button when the reporter mention Ryan’s name. Then her face flashed on the screen. And she sucked in a gasp.

Ryan stepped up next to her. The reporter was standing outside Ryan’s downtown office building.

“
Channel Two News has recently learned that pharmaceutical giant Ryan Harrison, whose wife died aboard U.S. Airlines flight 1466 which crashed shortly after takeoff from San Francisco five years ago, received shocking news earlier this week. His wife may still be alive.

“Sources confirm this woman, Kate Alexander, agreed to undergo DNA testing to verify suspicions she is Harrison’s estranged wife. A source close to Ms. Alexander also confirms she suffers from a rare form of amnesia, which has blocked out virtually all of her long-term memory, making this discovery even more amazing.

“Harrison, shown here in video from the Governor’s Ball last winter, and his lawyers are not commenting at this time, but sources do tell us it is highly likely Ms. Alexander is in fact Anne Harrison. Ryan Harrison, CEO of AmCorp Pharmaceuticals, has very rarely spoken publicly about his deceased wife. His company has been involved in several questionable take-over mergers lately
…”

“Fucking press.” Ryan flipped off the TV and headed for Mitch’s office.

Kate sank down onto the couch and covered her face. With trembling fingers she tried to rub away the headache already pounding away at her brain. As if things weren’t bad enough, now the story was all over the news.

Simone ushered the kids outside and sat next to her. Mitch followed Ryan into the office.

“Talk to me, Counselor,” Kate said.

“Well, I want to hear what Ryan’s PR people have to say, but I’m thinking you’re both going to have to make a public statement. It’s the only way we’re going to get the press off your backs. Odds are good they’re at your house right now, and at Ryan’s. I think you lucked out today by being here. As of yet, they haven’t found you, but they will.”

“Fabulous.”

She pushed off the couch and walked into Mitch’s office. Ryan was pacing with the phone pressed to his ear. Mitch stood in the corner of the room listening, his hands on his hips.

A chill spread over Kate. Ryan had definitely been frustrated and angry with her before, but this was different. His voice was icy, his face hard and rigid, and whomever he was talking to—and she assumed it was one of his lawyers—was taking the brunt of his fury.

“I don’t give a damn what they want,” he said into the phone. “My personal life is my own fucking business. I’ve never commented on it before. I’m sure as hell not going to start now.”

Kate listened to his end of the conversation, not feeling any better judging by the number of times Ryan swore. When he was done, he tossed the cordless phone on the desk, dropped into Mitch’s leather chair, leaned his head back, and closed his eyes. “What do you want to do?”

The question was meant for her. Kate looked to Simone, then back at Ryan’s hard face. “If we ignore it?”

“They’ll hound us until we break.”

Kate caught Simone’s nod of agreement. “So we face them head on.”

He met her gaze with steely eyes. “I don’t want my personal life strewn across the front page of the
National Star
.”

“Ryan,” Simone interjected for the first time, “I don’t think you have a choice in the matter right now. Either we give them something to print, or they’re going to do their damnedest to make up something much worse. I realize your need for privacy, but it’s the lesser of two evils we’re concerned with now.”