Vicious Circles (7 page)

Please?”

“Of course,” I chuckled as I smiled at her. I real y was grateful that I had her. I knew she’d come over in an instant if I cal ed her – no matter what time. And I’d do the same for her. “Thanks.”

“Sure,” she said and managed a tiny smile that didn’t quite reach her eyes. She wasn’t appeased but she’d honor my request.

Jennifer, the graduate, and her friends danced in front of the stage while the guys played. Irelyn amused me greatly as she watched the girls like a hawk, making sure none of them were flirting with Lucas. I couldn’t believe she was stil so insecure –

couldn’t she see how much Lucas loved her? Didn’t she realize how lucky she was to know she loved him and he loved her?

My gaze left Irelyn and wandered to the stage where it final y landed on Col in. I could see beads of perspiration on his brow reflecting the lights as he pounded on the drums. My heart thumped in time with his beat so hard that I was afraid I’d break a rib.

Lucky Tori, I thought. She’s an idiot if she doesn’t realize what’s right in front of her face.

A lump formed in my throat which irritated me. I scowled and folded my arms over my chest earning a curious look from Irelyn. I pretended not to see as I concentrated on the dancers. I was so tired of feeling teary-eyed and emotional al the time. This being in love crap total y sucked.

When the boys finished playing around eleven, Irelyn and I jumped on the stage to help them tear down their equipment and pack it up in the cases. We hauled it to the van Col in had rented and once we finished, Spencer suggested we go up to the rooms to have a drink. Col in pul ed me aside as everyone headed back in the hotel.

“What room are you in?” he asked.

My skin tingled from his touch. “Three-twelve,” I said. “Why? Thinking of grabbing a bottle of mescal?” I cringed, cursing my runaway mouth. But he laughed and squeezed my arm.

“No, not tonight. I was thinking that I’d stop by later and maybe we could talk.”

“Oh, sure,” I said, excitement shooting throughout my body. “That’s fine.”

“Great,” he said with a grin and dropped my arm. We hurried to catch up with the others.

We ended up in Irelyn and Lucas’s room and sprawled out on the furniture. Lucas fel on the bed, tugging Irelyn into his arms while Col in and I took the two chairs tucked under the table. Spencer passed out the beers then perched atop a dresser.

“Hey, Col in,” Lucas cal ed. “I thought you invited Tori to come?”

“I did,” Col in confirmed, squashing al the wonderful y tingling feelings that I’d been experiencing. “She didn’t want to come.” A worry line creased his forehead and I wondered briefly what that was al about.

“Is she sick or something?” I asked.

“Nah,” he said, flashing me a feeble smile. “She just didn’t want to come.” I real y didn’t want to spare Tori another thought but I couldn’t help it. She irritated the hel out of me for being too damn stupid to not see how devoted Col in was to her.

Deciding he needed to think about someone else, I brought up Morgan’s name.

“Where is Morgan?” I asked Irelyn. “Why isn’t she here?”

“Her cousin’s wedding was today, remember?” Irelyn reminded me.

“Oh, yeah,” I said as I peeled the label off my beer bottle. “I think I remember seeing that written on the calendar she has posted on our refrigerator.” I peeked at Col in out of the corner of my eye but his face was unreadable. I sighed as I finished off my beer. Suddenly, I wasn’t in the party mood and real y wanted to just crawl in my rented bed and sleep. But I didn’t – I accepted a fresh beer from Spencer and cracked it open.

My body refused to relax – even with the alcohol. It was far too aware of Col in sitting just a couple feet away from me. It yearned to move closer

– to touch him – but I concentrated on the various colors woven into the carpet to keep from jumping over the table. I had to behave now and especial y later when he came to my room.

I fol owed the conversation but didn’t contribute much. I patiently waited until the appropriate amount of time passed when I could excuse myself and go to my room.

I was eager to have a conversation with Col in but dreading it at the same time. I wasn’t entirely sure that my heart would remain whole.

Spencer was the one who final y broke up the party. Standing to stretch, he claimed he was tired and going to turn in early. He waved distractedly as he hurried out of the room.

“Okay, is it just me or is Spencer acting a little weird?” I asked.

Col in shook his head. “He’s been a little off for the last few days.”

“Damn,” I mumbled as I stared anxiously at the door. “Is it because of me?”

“I don’t think so,” Lucas said slowly. “I mean, I know he real y liked you and al but I think something else is going on. He’s not talking, though.”

“Like someone else I know,” Irelyn muttered.

Rol ing my eyes, I got to my feet. “Whatever, Irelyn.” She grinned. “I’m heading off to bed, too. See you al in the morning.” I escaped before Irelyn could protest and walked the short distance to my room. Once I let myself in, I set my beer down, and paced, wondering how long Col in would wait until he made his excuses.

For something to do, I went into the bathroom and released my hair from the braid, shaking it out so it could hang down my back. I was reaching for my brush when I heard the light knock on the door.

My heart fluttered and flipped as my jel y legs led me to the door. I peeked through the peephole and my nervousness increased. I opened the door to let him before someone could spot him lingering near my room.

“Thanks,” he said as he brushed past me. I closed my eyes as a whiff of his cologne floated in front of my face. I dashed to the bed and sank to it as he pul ed out a chair. “So, let’s talk.”

“Al right,” I said with a shrug, deciding that I would be honest with him. Mostly.

“Okay, so I did leave to sort of get away from you and this whole mess. But I told you I was going to do that, remember?”

“That’s what I thought,” he said as a smirk toyed in the corner of his mouth. “I’m sorry you felt you had to leave, though.” I held up a hand. “I only did it to give you a little space, Col in,” I whispered. “I knew you were feeling bad about what happened.”

“Bailey,” he said and my heart thril ed to hear my name rol off his tongue. “Yeah, I felt bad, but it had nothing to do with you. And you shouldn’t have had to run off somewhere because of it.”

Nodding, I stood and fetched the beer I’d set on the dresser. I took a long drink before turning back to face him. “It’s not a big deal. It was nice to hang out at home for awhile.”

His eyes roamed over my entire body and spread heat throughout my stomach. “It agreed with you. You look gorgeous.” I fought a blush and gave him a wry smile instead. “Thanks.”

He crossed the room, stopping in front of me. Taking my free hand, he squeezed it.

“And I swear, I didn’t mean what I said in the men’s room that day. I didn’t mean to make it sound like you were … you know…how do I say this… damn!” He ran a hand through his hair.

“Col in, don’t worry about it – I know. I was very hung over and oversensitive.”

“Don’t make excuses for me, Bailey,” he said as he squeezed my hand again. “I was acting like an insensitive prick.” I had to smile. “Maybe.” Laughing, he pul ed me into his arms. I closed my eyes and inhaled his scent as I rested my cheek against his chest. I didn’t want the talk to end

– I wanted him to stay in the room al night.

And my body was reacting indecently to his innocent hug. My blood was boiling and my pulse was racing through my veins. As I wrapped an arm around his middle, I could feel the muscles in his back and my insides caught fire.

Then his lips were in my hair. I forced my head to stay put and not turn up so his lips could land on mine. His hands rubbed my back lightly, coaxing a contented sigh to escape my mouth. Reluctantly, I pul ed away to smile up at him.

“Thanks, Col in.”

I thought I spotted a flicker of desire shoot through his eyes but I couldn’t be sure. I probably imagined it.

He lifted a hand to stroke my cheek and my eyes fluttered shut. I stepped closer, clutching his shirt. His finger trailed my jawline making goosebumps jump out on my arms. He lowered his head and kissed me softly – so softly I barely felt it. My heart surged as he cupped my cheek and his kiss increased.

I was vaguely aware that I stil held a bottle of beer and wanted desperately to put it down so I could free my hand, but I was afraid that if I stepped away, the kiss would end and I wouldn’t get another one.

He applied more pressure and my knees buckled. The arm around my waist tightened to support me, easing me closer to his body while his other hand tangled in my hair.

Feelings like I’d never known raced up and down my nervous system, wreaking havoc with my organs. Everything I thought I knew about guys and how to handle them flew out the window and that was fine. I al owed my body to shut down so I could concentrate only on his kiss.

I wanted him – true – but more than that, I loved him. I loved how I fit in his arms. I loved how when I stood on my toes and he bent his head, we met perfectly. I loved how his fingers twisted and twined in my hair. And I loved how his hand was gentle yet firm on the smal of my back. Nothing about his kiss made me feel like he was anxious to just get me in bed. Instead, it made me feel … cherished, in a way.

Final y, he ended the kiss, his lips lingering briefly on mine. I opened my eyes and he smiled sheepishly at me.

“Sorry,” he said, his cheeks a little red. He inched back and rubbed the back of his neck. “I didn’t intend to do that when I suggested we talk.” I shook my head. “It’s okay.” I took a long drink from the bottle before handing it to him. His smile widened as he finished it off and tossed it in the trash can.

“I should go,” he said. He strode to the door and rested his hand on the knob. “Um, are we cool?”

“Yep,” I said as cheerful y as I could. “Everything’s fine.”

“You’re not going to hide anymore, are you?”

Snorting, I punched his arm playful y. “Nah. You guys are stuck with me again.”

“Good,” he grinned. “I missed you.”

My heart cheered and I swal owed to settle it down. “Sweet talker,” I teased with a wink. “Get the hel out of here – I need to get to bed.” He nodded, his brows dipped slightly. “Get some sleep. I’l see you at breakfast.”

“Okay.”

As soon as he left, I fel to the bed and draped an arm over my eyes. I was an idiot to think I might have a chance with him – even if one of my best friends wasn’t in love with him. It was obvious he was attracted to me – but that was where it ended.

He could never love me – I wasn’t the type of girl guys fel in love with. And that was fine – I’d deal.

Chapter 6

I decided that Steffi's idea was bril iant and that a part-time job might be good for me. And the notice on the pool house bul etin board was just the thing. The condo association needed a part-time lifeguard at the pool Tuesday through Thursday mornings.

I could do that – I'd received my lifeguard certification in high school. Plus the job wouldn’t interfere with my weekends.

The head of the condo association hired me on the spot which sort of amused me.

He was a fifty-something man with a wolfish demeanor and the way he leered at me indicated me that if I wanted a pay raise, I could get it with little effort.

Good thing Daddy was rich.

I wish I could say things settled down and returned to normal but that wasn't the case. Morgan was jittery, constantly watching me out of the corner of her eye.

Spencer was preoccupied and quiet. And Col in was concerned and a little overbearing. Oh, not with me. No, not at al .

Tori started showing up at Rusty’s on Friday nights which was like a massive kick in my gut. And she always tagged along with whatever we’d decide to do after the guys finished their set. The funny thing was that she didn’t hang al over Col in and he didn’t treat her as a girlfriend, per se. I wasn’t sure if they were a couple or not.

Not even Irelyn or Lucas knew, either.

As much as my heart crumpled and fel into a pile of litter at my feet, I felt ten times worse for Morgan whose face was a constant mask of anxiety and hurt. I would have loved to tear into Col in for what he was doing to Morgan, but the poor guy had no clue. Maybe if Morgan would speak up she’d have a chance. But then, Col in was so into Tori that I don’t think he would hear a word.

Yeah, life was pretty crappy al around.

As the Fourth of July approached, the Newton boys decided that they would throw the First Annual Newton Brothers Barbecue. Irelyn was not thril ed since it was up to her to cal everyone and write down what dish they would like to bring to share with everyone. Being the good friend that I am, I told her I would just bring al the food if the guys would provide the booze. Irelyn agreed and hung up before I could change my mind.

The party was going to be at Col in’s place since there was a nice-sized yard behind the house – with a privacy fence. He also agreed to cook the meat on the gril .

Being the daughter of a chain-store owner, I was privy to al sorts of deals. Daddy’s department stores had wonderful grocery sections in them. I just cal ed my daddy, told him of the party and he made a list of al the things I needed. The day of the party I stopped at the nearest store and the manager had everything ready to load in my car.

I arrived a little early but I didn’t want to wait until two o’clock – I had a car ful of food that I didn't want to spoil. I wandered around to the back yard, looking for someone to help me with the al the bags. I paused near the gate and gaped. Col in was standing before a huge gril – his back to me – hefting a huge bag of charcoal.

He was wearing cargo shorts and no shirt. My mind rewound to that night and a shiver hurtled up my spine. I was total y mesmerized and it took al I had to shake out of my stupor before he caught me ogling him.

“Dinner and a show? Wow, I am impressed,” I said, my voice strangely strained.

He nearly dropped the bag as he swirled to the sound of my voice. His face relaxed in a slow, heartbreaking smile and I leaned against the gate to support my wobbly legs.