Vicious (18 page)

She smiled slightly. “You’re right. But he’s also capable of great love. For example, his first wife, Damon’s mother, he loved her so much that when she decided she hated his lifestyle and wanted to take her son away, he let her. It broke his heart that she married another man and let him raise Damon, but he didn’t stand in her way, even after she died, because he knew that was what she wanted.”

“And does he love you like that?”

She let out a breath. “I don’t think so. Not yet, but that doesn’t matter. I’m happy with how things are.”

The wine must have gone to my head because I blurted out. “He stole his own son’s girlfriend. Who does that?”

She let out a laugh that surprised me. “Don’t be thinking that Brody was the victim as much as he probably made out. Brody didn’t give a shit about me, he just liked to collect pretty things and show them off. The only thing Brody cares about is making money. He ignored me and in the end, we were barely sleeping together. He had yearned after me for so long, that when he finally got me, he got bored quickly. I was sad, and Michael became my shoulder to cry on. We didn’t mean for what happened to happen…” She frowned. “I was supposed to be interrogating you, how did this turn around on to me?”

She got to her feet. “
Never mind, I’d better check on how the chef is coming along with dinner. She’s a brilliant cook but likes her drink a little too much if you know what I mean.” Her heels echoed on the wood as she walked away, somewhat unsteadily, but then turned back to me, spinning on her stiletto heel. “Brody doesn’t love anything, not really, that’s why I don’t feel bad.” Then she spun back and continued on her way.

I decided to sit out
side; the interior was stifling and hot with their family drama. I borrowed one of Lisa’s wraps and moved to sit in a chair at the water’s edge. It was a moonless night, and for once, I felt comforted by sitting in complete darkness. It was good to be hidden; it made it easier to think. I finally let myself revel in the reality that I had seen Damon. He was here, and close enough to touch. But I couldn’t.

Footsteps made me turn, and there he stood.

“Hi,” I said softly.

“Hey.” He sat beside me. “I didn’t expect to see you here of all places.”

“Same.”

“That Brody…he’s a clever fuck.” He gave a bitter laugh. “I had a photo of you in my bedroom when I first moved in
with Michael. Brody saw it once and asked me about you…I guess he never forgot.”

And that was the first time that night that my mind processed the very likely fact that Brody had orchestrated this as a type of revenge on Damon.

“You think he’s doing it to piss you off? It was years ago now.”

He took me by surprise when he grabbed my hand. “I’m sorry, Violet. I was such
a dick to you. I was so stupid. I’ve been kicking myself over it for years.”

“It doesn’t matter.” His hand was warm on mine and I never wanted him to remove it.

“It does matter. I worried about you. I heard you took off after everything. I had no idea that you would end up here.”

I forced a smile. “I’m alw
ays okay, Damon. All the time. How’s your Dad.”

He squeezed my hand harder. “He died of a heart attack a few years ago.”

“Oh no. I’m so sorry. I liked him, he was always so nice to me.” Suddenly, I felt like crying.

“He liked you too, Violet.”

We heard footsteps and turned to see Brody. Damon let my hand go and Brody’s eyes searched over us. “This is sweet.” His lips quirked up into a smile that was anything but sweet. “Dinner is ready, you two can reminisce later.”

We slowly stood, and as I did, Brody f
irmly took my hand in his. I didn’t know if Damon noticed, or if he cared or not. He walked ahead of us up the path and into the light of the house. I didn’t say anything to Brody then, even though my blood was starting to simmer. I was quiet at dinner, but no one seemed to notice or care. One thing that struck me was the obvious affection that Michael had for Damon, and if I wasn’t so mad at Brody, I would have almost felt sorry for him. Still, he didn’t act like it bothered him. He still had on that aloof persona, but I felt myself warming to Lisa. She knew how to handle him, and at times she nearly coaxed smiles from him. I think it was a game to her, and I also thought that she had genuine affection for him. Maybe not the way a lover does, but more like a friend.

I excused myself early and went up the bedroom, after showering I slipped into bed. Brody didn’t come until much later, fumes of alcohol poured off him and he eyed me with almost amusement. He started to undress and I sat up to watch him.

“The reason you wanted me was to piss off Damon?” I asked finally.

“Yeah, well. What better way to piss off the kid than make his
ex-girlfriend my whore. Although, coming across you was just a coincidence, I thought you looked familiar and then I had you mugged to make sure it was really you.” He spoke so casually as he carefully laid his clothes on a chair.

I touched my face, remembering how swollen and s
ore it had been. “You’re such an asshole.”

“Yeah, yeah.
I know.” He got under the sheets and reached for me.

I pushed him away.
“Just when I was beginning to think that you were almost human—“

“Cut the crap, Violet. I made it clear to you from the beginning what I was. This is the only secret that I kept from you. Now get your ass over here and ride me.”

I glared at him. “Fuck you. I’m leaving in the morning. I’ll be out of your place by the time you get back.”

“What are you going to do? Go running into the arms of your precious Damon? Do you really think he’ll want you after I made you my whore? After he learns that you traded all your
self-respect for money and a nice place to live? Really, Violet, who does that?” he mocked.

“I’m leaving you,” I told him coldly. “You’re more twisted than I thought.”

He just laughed at me. “Okay, well, let me add one more thing to that twisted mix. I had your mother moved.”

I frowned. “What?”

“It was surprisingly easy considering that I’m not family or anything. She’s in a very nice hospital not far from here. I’ll take you to see her in the morning. It’s a nice place. There are gardens for her to walk through, they have activities and she has her own room. The staff are great, they even take her out for walks in the evening to see the moon. They say it does her a world of good.”

Everything in me turned to ice.
“What?” I repeated dumbly.

He gave me a sly smile. “Okay, now here’s the twisted part. If you move out, I’m going to move her from this won
derful facility, to a mediocre state funded, inner city concrete hospital which is more like a prison and where you can’t even look out a window to see the night sky.”

I just stared at him, and he stared back, never blinking.

“I hate you,” I said quietly.

He smiled slight
ly. “I know, and it doesn’t matter.”

There was nothing about Litchfield House that told you that it contained the unwell and sometimes violent within its walls. The guard at the gate smiled and waved us through like we were entering a country club. The lawns were manicured
, and someone took great care of the rows of roses that were everywhere. I sat in the car, staring at it like I had arrived in some bizarre universe. Brody came around my side to help me out, but I snatched my hand away from him before he could take it. He didn’t seem offended; after all, we had barely spoken two words to each other since breakfast.

A friendly woman greeted us. “Hello
, Mr Nicolai, and you must be Violet. She’s going to be very excited that you’re here. She’s in the art room. She does some amazing pieces.”

I smiled at her faintly. “That’s what she used to be, before…”

The woman nodded at me and smiled like she understood. Brody touched my arm lightly. “This way.” I followed him up a hallway that was painted in a soft yellow tone and had polished wooden floorboards. It was a far cry from the sickly, vomit inducing green that I was used to. The art room was filled with light, and my mother sat on a stool, painting onto a canvas. Her hair had been cut short and sat attractively around her jaw line. I stood there watching her, for a moment I could forget that she was sick, and memories of that young, vibrant mother flooded back to me. Brody moved past me to sit beside her.

“Hello, Adelaide,” he greeted her with a warm smile.

“Brody, have you come to serve me,” she asked as she lifted her head almost regally.

“Always.”
He turned to look at me standing in the doorway and waved me over, but I didn’t move. My mother followed his gaze. “Look, it’s another goddess. She can have you,” she told him generously.

“You’re very gracious,” he told her, his eyes flicking up to me once more, waiting. I took a breath and moved toward them.

“Hi, Mom,” I bent down to kiss her cheek, she smelled clean. “I’m sorry that I haven’t visited you for a while.”

“Look what I’ve done,” she clutched my hand as she faced her artwork. It was of a crescent moon with stars do
tted on a night sky which was such a rich, deep purple that it seemed to be made of velvet.

“It’s beautiful,” I told her.

Brody silently moved off the stool he was sitting on. “I’ll give you some time alone,” he told me as he moved passed me. I felt almost scared to be alone with her, but I took his place on the stool.

“Are you happy, Mom?” I asked her.

“They let me see the moon here, I go crazy if I don’t see the moon,” she told me as she picked up her paintbrush again and concentrated on the strokes that she made. I sat and watched her. She concentrated on what she was doing, and every so often she would speak to me. Sometimes what she said made sense, sometimes she didn’t. I just nodded at her and smiled, content to listen to whatever she had to say. She was still a stranger to me, but she seemed settled and as happy as perhaps she could be.

A nurse came to call her for lunch, she happily placed down her paintbrush and stood, ready to go. But before she did, she turned to me as if she just remembered that I was there. “Are you looking after the moon for me?”

A lump formed in my throat. “Yes, Mom.”

“Good.” And then she swe
pt past me like she was royalty with her head held high. Brody was waiting for me outside. Hands in his pockets, he was looking at the roses. As if he sensed me, he turned.

“Ready to go?”

I nodded, walking toward his car. As soon as he turned the ignition, he started talking. “It has a great reputation. They cater to each patient individually and create different therapy programs for each one.” I only half listened to him as I hugged my stomach and tried to digest the whole experience. My stomach seemed to lurch with each corner.

“Stop the car!” I yelled.

He pulled over to the side of the road abruptly, and I scrambled to get out of the car in time. Bending over, I vomited out everything in me until only dry heaves were left.

“Here.” Brody handed me a tissue, and I leaned against the side of the car for support as I wiped my eyes and mouth. He waited silently beside me as I regained my composure.

I sniffed. “Hospitals always make me sick.” He didn’t say anything as he opened the car door for me. Instead of heading back to the lake house, he stopped at a small café.

“If you’re not feeling well, it’s best not to be around my family. They could make anyone sick,” he said as I got out.
I didn’t know if he was joking or not.

“Damon doesn’t make me feel sick.”

He nodded and stayed quiet as we made our way inside. I ordered water and a sandwich, hoping to settle my stomach.

“So, do you like Litchfield House?”
he asked.

“Shut up. You know I do, and I want my mother to stay there,” I said begrudgingly.

“Good. You’ve made the right choice.” We ate the rest of our lunch in silence, and everything tasted bitter.

On the drive back, Brody broke the silence. “Tell me, I don’t quite understand, sometimes she seems to be the moon goddess, and
at other times her handmaiden. Which is it?”

“Well, at first she was the handmaiden. She used to hang out with a group of people who were like moon worshippers. Really, they were just druggies wh
o liked to dance around in the dark and the moon worshipping thing was their excuse. She used to tell me that she considered sacrificing me when I was born to the goddess…” It was odd how normal I sounded, but the look that Brody darted toward me showed me that what I had just said was anything but normal. “Anyway, she obviously didn’t. When she got worse, she seemed to think that she was the goddess.” I shut up after that; I didn’t want to share anything more with Brody. Knowing him, he would just use it against me at a later date.

I turned my face to the window and watched the countryside go by. I was reminded of how my mother had said that there was no moon the night that I was born. That meant that I wasn’t protected by the goddess
, and she had tried her whole life to make it up and please the goddess so I would be looked after. I remembered thinking how lucky I was to have such a mother…