Verity (6 page)

“Oh, no, sorry!” I was embarrassed to have made it sound like my story even came close to comparing with theirs. “Mine just didn’t want me.” I closed my eyes for a second, wincing a bit at how pathetic that sounded out loud.

“I’m sorry.”

“Oh. It’s not a big deal,” I said hurriedly. “I mean, not like you... sorry, what I meant was it isn’t upsetting for me. She was never around, so I don’t miss her or anything. That’s obviously nowhere near as bad as what’s happened to you and Amelia. I’m realy sorry about your parents.”

“It wasn’t recent,” he said, his voice soft as he moved closer. “But Amelia, she’s....”

“Sensitive?” I offered.

“Yeah, exactly. I have to look out for her a lot. Our mother was murdered so....” He stopped talking and looked at me blankly as if he didn’t know quite what to say.

It was as though he had the world on his shoulders, so I touched his arm lightly without thinking.

“It’s okay. I’l look out for her when you’re not there,” I reassured him. I wasn’t sure why I said it or even why I felt like I had to look out for Amelia. There was something about them both that made me feel like I knew them wel and hearing their mother had been murdered just strengthened the connection I felt.

He smiled at me gratefuly. I was starting to feel sort of normal around him. He moved even closer to me, and I realised my hand was stil on his arm. My fingers stung with the heat, it was just like before except this was a slow, lingering burn rather than a quick shock. I held on for too long, but I couldn’t move away. I didn’t want to.

“Thank you, Perdita. It means a lot that you’re a friend to her.” He spoke so quietly I could barely hear him. Not that I was paying much attention to what he was saying, I was too busy staring at him al dreamy-eyed. Something about the way he said my name put me in a little bit of a trance.

“Oh, look, how
cute
. Our resident freak thinks she actualy has a chance with Nate.”

I whipped my hand away and stepped back quickly, not needing to look around. I already knew Dawn was sneering at me. She puled Abbi in front of me, knocking me backward in the process. She made sure I saw the flirty grin she directed at Nathan. My fingers itched with a compulsion to pul her to the ground by her hair.

Dawn casualy rested her hand on Nathan’s chest. “Ready to walk us to our next class?”

The bel rang and Nathan checked his watch with a frown. “I suppose I better go....” He looked over at me, I nodded at him to let him know I would wait for Amelia.

I got the feeling he didn’t want anyone else to know she was upset.

“Thanks again, Perdita,” he said before he walked off, folowed by Dawn and Abbi. Abbi looked behind her and gave me a quick sympathetic smile, but my good humour disappeared.

Amelia wasn’t long. Her eyes were a little less red looking. “Where did Nathan go?”

“Ah, Dawn came and claimed him,” I tried to look cheerful.

She roled her eyes. “I should disown him for being mates with her.”

“She can be nice when she feels like it, I mean, she’s popular for a reason,” I told Amelia as we walked toward our classrooms.

“Yeah, ‘cos she’s a scary biatch. I meant what I said earlier by the way, about you al coming over. You anyway. You could come over for dinner or something.”

“Shouldn’t you let your family know before you start inviting random strangers to your house?” I reminded her.

“You
so
don’t count as a stranger.” She said it lightly, but again, the intensely serious look on her face unsettled me. She gave a little wave and hurried off to her side of the building leaving me wondering.

Too agitated to think straight, the only thoughts in my head were how it felt to be so close to Nathan, and yet how easy it was for people like Dawn to stand in front of me. The story of my life, and it was about time I changed it. Tammie hadn’t exactly helped my mood by being so unnecessarily nasty to Amelia.

As soon as I stepped into my classroom, Dawn burst into exaggerated giggles. Her laughter felt like razor blades running across my skin. She was so obvious about everything. I felt like sneering right back at her, instead I eyed her as boldly as I dared. She whispered loudly to some of the people next to her, most of them laughed out loud. Aaron Hannigan observed me with some interest as if I had just been born that second in front of him.

“Settle down,” the teacher said. “As for you, Ms. Rivers, you’re late.”

I shrugged. “Sorry.”

As I walked past some of the desks to get to an empty seat, Dawn pushed her school bag into my path. I kicked it back under her desk with an enormous amount of satisfaction.

“Eh, do you mind?” she said, loud enough for everyone to hear.

“Eh, do you mind keeping your shit to yourself?” I didn’t stutter, it felt great.

Dawn whirled around to look at her friends. “The cheek of that one.”

Nathan and Aaron both looked mildly amused, but the girls al gasped in mock horror.

Tammie grinned up at me, but I walked straight past her and sat at an empty table. I needed to be alone. I didn’t know exactly what was wrong with me, but I figured it was a little of everything. Tammie’s treatment of Amelia because she was jealous, Nathan making me think it might be possible he liked me a little and then running off with anyone who demanded his attention, and finaly Dawn’s incessant needling. It hadn’t been just that week; she had always tried her best to make either myself or Tammie feel stupid or insecure.

Tammie tried in vain to catch my eye throughout the rest of the class, but I was busy working myself up into a tight bal of rage. As soon as the bel rang, she was up and in front of my desk, blocking my way so I would have to speak to her.

“Are you seriously going to start ignoring me now?”

I wasn’t in the habit of standing up to my Dad or Dawn, but I had never done it to Tammie either. I was sick of being a doormat for everyone. I had to admit I might have been a smal, tiny bit hormonal, or hormental as Tammie liked to say.

“Just leave me alone. I’m not in the humour for this.” I tried to warn her, but she had to push it. Just because she could. That usualy worked with me, but things were changing.
I
was changing.

“You’re going to pick a new kid over me? Some friend you are!”

“Piss off Tamara. You’re the one always forcing people to pick sides, and now that I think about it, you’re the only one
making
sides. Would you ever stop and cop on and think about what you say for a change? Why do you have to be a bitch for absolutely no reason? How could you bring up my Mam like that? You know I hate talking about her. And comparing that whole thing with someone whose mother died just to make them feel bad was low, even for you!” The ever shrinking sensible part of me deep inside was screaming at me to shut up, or at least calm down, but I was on a rol.

“Perdy, settle down,” Joey said, getting involved as always and riling me up even more.

“Is this your business? Just because you don’t have the bals to stick up for anyone else doesn’t mean it has to run in the family, you know.” Visibly taken aback, he was probably a little hurt, but I was beyond caring. Dawn pretty much cackled behind him. “So funny when the loners turn on each other.” I pointed my finger at her, furious now. “If you don’t shut the fu....”

“Okay, relax girls,” Nathan interrupted, standing in front of me with his arms out like he was shielding Dawn.

“What are you, her bodyguard?”

He laughed at me. He actualy laughed at me. I was seconds away from exploding,

and he had to go and laugh at me. What kind of an idiot laughs at someone on a rampage? Dawn peeked out from behind him with the most annoyingly smug expression I have ever seen. My hand itched to slap it off her face.

“Don’t mind him,” Tammie said. “He’s just as bad as her. Let’s go.”

She puled me by the arm, taking advantage of the situation the second my anger was directed elsewhere. I folowed without thinking, glaring at Nathan as I stormed past him. His forehead wrinkled, but he moved out of our way.

“Girls,” Joey muttered, picking up our bags and shuffling after us. Out in the hal, Tammie made a show of giving me a big hug when the others walked by. I was stil vibrating with anger. She held me tight while Dawn looked me up and down as if sensing I was at snapping point and might do something that would get me into a lot of trouble with my Dad.

“Let’s go shopping or something,” she whispered in my ear.

“What, now?”

“Yeah, why not? We could use a break. Joey wil cover for us.”

Joey sighed when she asked for his help but agreed to try and keep us out of trouble. I was more than wiling to get out of school because I was close to tears. The anger I had been feeling had floated away, leaving me with an awful feeling of melancholy and a lump in my throat. Al I could think about was how Nathan had pretty much protected Dawn from me. She was the buly and tormentor in our year, and he was protecting her from me? It was one of those days—I knew if I didn’t get away from everyone I’d go completely overboard and say or do something I would absolutely regret.

I sent Amelia a text letting her know we were ditching. I hoped she wouldn’t be mad at me for kind of rowing with her brother and being friends with Tammie again already. She didn’t text me back, so I figured she was probably annoyed at me.

We snuck out of school and caught a bus into town. It’s a lot easier to ditch when you don’t have a school uniform. It was the first time I had ever left school when I wasn’t supposed to, but I was tired of worrying about rules. It was nice to make a choice for myself for a change.

Our first stop was a chocolate milkshake in a fast food restaurant on Grafton Street. We sat there for at least an hour, sharing chips and getting funny looks from the cleaning staff.

“So, what’s the deal with you Perdy?” Tammie said at last. “You’re acting so different lately. Even before today, I mean. I get today, wel, sort of. But what’s going on with you?”

I shrugged. “Dunno. Just feel different.”

“You flipped out a bit earlier,” she said, hesitant, as if she was afraid I’d lose it on her.

I couldn’t help laughing. “Yeah, I did a bit. I blame Dawn. Everywhere I turn, she’s there mocking me over something. It’s starting to get in on me.”

“I thought you were going to smack her one,” Tammie said, her face lighting up at the memory.

“I don’t know what I was going to do.”

“Then stupid new boy stepped in and ruined it.” Tammie made a face; she had always wanted to see somebody smack Dawn Talbot hard.

I made a face too but for different reasons.

“I think she’s jealous of you,” Tammie said.

I spluttered into my milkshake. “You what?”

“Realy. I think she’s getting at you because she likes Nathan.”

“What’s that got to do with me?”

“Wel, you’re making friends with his sister, so you’l probably be around him. And he looks at you an awful lot.” I roled my eyes. “No he doesn’t. And lots of people are going to be friends with his sister, doesn’t mean a thing.”

“I’m just saying. I think she’s afraid he’s going to like you instead of her. I would be, if I was her.” I looked at Tammie like she had four heads. “Are we living in two different worlds or what? He sits with her, not me. He talks to her, not me. He picked up for her, not me. Think it’s pretty clear she has no worries. Besides, she was getting at me long before Nathan Evans came along.”

“That’s ‘cos you were friends with me. This is different. As for him, maybe he’s shy. Just because he sits with al them doesn’t mean he likes her. And I think he was just stepping in to calm everyone down. I don’t think he was realy picking up for anyone, Perdy.” She looked thoughtful for a minute. “You know, it would
really
annoy Dawn if he liked you.”

“No!”

She flinched. “What? I haven’t even suggested anything yet!” She tried to look innocent, but the fit of husky laughter she burst into ruined the effect. I knew Tammie too wel; she would have enjoyed it if I tried to make Nathan like me just to ruin Dawn’s day.

“Don’t even think about it, okay? Besides, I reckon there’s more chance of him liking Abbi than Dawn.”

“How do you figure that?” she said, frowning.

“Abbi is prettier than Dawn, and she’s nicer too.”

Tammie looked horrified.

“I don’t mean she’s nice,” I amended. “Just that she’s not as evil as Dawn.”

Tammie considered this. “She
is
prettier. Dawn’s lips are too thin, and her eyes are a bit sly and squinty. But he doesn’t seem to notice any of them in that kind of way. Maybe he has a thing for redheads,” she added with a grin. “I wonder would Amelia know. I’m going to ask her.”

“No, you’re not. And while we’re on the subject, you have to be nicer to Amelia,” I lectured.

She was wise enough to look abashed. “Okay, so I
was
trying to be mean to her before, but you
saw
Joey, he’s going to like her, I just know it.”

“So what? That doesn’t mean anything. Anyway, if you like him so much then tel him instead of chasing off anyone who hasn’t even expressed an interest yet.”

“I can’t.” She shook her head.

“Why? What’s the worst that could happen? At least you’l know and stop living in limbo land.”

“Worst that could happen... let me think. Oh, yeah, he doesn’t like me back, it gets al awkward, and then we can’t even be friends?” She was a little too sarcastic for my liking.

“Just tel him. Or jump on him, I don’t know. But get it over and done with before somebody else does, and you miss your chance. How can you win if you’re acting like you’re not in the race?”

She stared at me, considering. “Do you realy think someone else wil get stuck in if I don’t?”

I hesitated. “Wel, some day, yeah. I don’t think girls are going to be kicking down his door or anything, but imagine if one of Dawn’s crowd took a liking to him. And they ended up getting married or something. Then we’d be stuck with them forever al because you couldn’t tel him you liked him.” I sat back and watched her face tense up. I knew mentioning the D word would get her going.