Veracity (The Seven Cities Book 1) (21 page)

"Know what?"

"That Grayson is going to tell you. I don't have time to explain it but you are in danger and you need to leave with me now!"

"I can't trust you, Jack, and I have a life here now. I'm not leaving, but you need to."

"Didn't you hear what I said?" he asks, shocked. "They are already here, they have always been here. You have to be the next General's wife, and they will do anything to make that happen."

"You aren't making any sense!" I cry. "Stop being so cryptic and tell me what is going on. Who is here? Who wants to hurt me?"

"I can't tell you, not now. You wouldn't believe me and there isn't time to explain. You have to leave with me tonight!"

"I am not going anywhere. I don't want to, but I will scream if you don't leave."

"Fine. Have it your way," he huffs, limping through the door. "But the only reason I am leaving is because I can't protect you if I'm locked up. I will be here when you need me Kat, I promise I will protect you."

"Don't be crazy Jack! You need to forget about me. If you get caught, who knows what they would do? I can't bear the thought of seeing you hurt."

"So you still care about me?"

"Against my better judgment," I say pulling myself off the floor. "I don't love you Jack, but I know that I used to."

"That's a start," he says as he disappears into the night.

It's terribly disturbing that no one comes to check on me. I know that our scuffle had to have been loud enough to draw attention, but no one comes, not even Maggie. Maybe these walls are thicker than I imagined. I spend a long time standing on the balcony, staring off into the darkness. Was Jack out there now? Was he watching me?

Morning comes quickly and despite the active night, I am in a great mood. The time since Alana's execution has been a lonely one with not even Travis making much time for me, so even though I am worried about what he will say, I am excited about seeing Grayson.

As I dress, I look for any sign that either Maggie or Sadie may have heard something last night, but no one lets on if they did.

"That spooky old woman is making her way up the main stairs," Sadie tells me, sticking her head into the dressing room. "If you hurry you might be able to avoid her."

"You just saved my morning Sadie!"

I finish dressing in record time, and make a mad dash for the stairwell at the opposite end of the hall. I know I am being cruel trying to hide from her, but I just don't have the patience for her this morning. She might not be coming to see me anyway. Laura's suite is not far down the hall from mine.

The garden is enchanting this time of day, full of people milling about on the soft grass and talking quietly in pairs. The flowers are all in bloom, and hundreds of tiny butterflies fly through the air. Children from the preschool giggle as they chase them, filling the garden with the sound of their laughter. The carriage is already waiting for me, and I bound up the steps, surprised to see that it's Travis, not Grayson who greets me.

"I hope you don't mind," he says. "Grayson asked if I could take you today instead."

"Of course," I say, trying not to seem too disappointed. "I thought he had something he needed to talk to me about."

"He did, but he was afraid he wouldn't be able to find the words, and even if he did, that he wouldn't be able to handle your disappointment with him. My brother may seem tough, but he has a hard time with rejection."

"Rejection? What are you talking about? Why would I reject Grayson?"

"Because he loves you. He has always loved you."

"He is in love with me? What about this mysterious fiancée that he was so enamored with? What happened to her?"

"That was you." Travis says sadly. "You were never meant to marry me. You and Grayson were promised to each other from an early age."

"Wait," I say, stunned, "I'm lost. If I was supposed to marry Grayson before I was taken, then why am I suddenly engaged to you when I return? Isn't that lying? Didn't this whole society get founded on the idea of honesty? I think I am going to throw up." I say putting my head in my hands.

"I was never a fan of deceiving you," he starts. "And Grayson fought it the entire way, but it was at the command of your brother. He thought a marriage to a second son wasn't good enough for you. You've seen how eccentric he is, how he considers himself a king. He wants you to be in a ruling position, for what reason, I can only guess."

"That is the single dumbest thing I have ever heard. How could my brother get such an idea in his head? Why the charade? He's my only male relative, he could have ordered me to marry anyone he wanted."

"Honestly, we think he might be mad. His thoughts have always been just a little off, but now they seem completely insane. Even so, he loves you in his own way. He saw your memory loss as a good opportunity to change your marriage contract without affecting your feelings. He would have been much more hesitant to carry out his plans if he knew it would break your heart."

"I can't believe this," I say, shocked. "I am the one Grayson mopes around about. This whole time you have been lying to me, courting me, and he has been miserable watching us together."

"We were fools to think we could really pull it off," he says softly. "That your hearts wouldn't call to each other. I've seen the way you are drawn to him."

"That's exactly what it feels like," I say, thoughtfully. "I think a part of me remembers him. Somewhere, deep down, my heart knew him from the moment he found me."

"Do you hate us?" he asks.

"Of course not. I'm angry and confused, but I see how this wasn't your choice. I don't even hate my brother, although now I am concerned about his mental health. Thinking up such a scheme, and for what? To make me a General's wife? What kind of power does he expect me to wield in that position? Amber's isn't any more powerful than I am now."

"I am so relieved to hear you say that. I almost refused Grayson when he begged me to tell you. I was so afraid you would hate me. I have turned him down so many times, but after the incident with Alana, he just couldn't let it go."

"I couldn't hate you. I know what it is like to try and do the right thing, to be the right person, even when you are not sure you like who that is."

"What about Grayson? Will you go to him?"

"Not in the way that he hopes. A strong attraction is one thing, but love is something different altogether. We haven't exactly had a chance to build a relationship. Besides, from what I am hearing, I am still set to marry you. Has that changed?"

"No," Travis says, surprised, "not yet. Your brother knows nothing of us telling you, and my father will not defy him. It is dangerous to do so. Axiom is in a position to crush us should Lucas take it upon himself to do so."

"I understand that Grayson is hurting, but if my possibly crazy brother is using my marriage as a catalyst for aggression, telling me was not the wisest thing to do. I don't know what Grayson is expecting from this. I may not know myself as well as I should, but I know I'm strong enough to choose reason over emotion. Will you refuse to marry me now that I know Grayson loves me, and I once loved him?"

"Of course not. If my father commands it, I will obey."

"Then I think it is time to stop living in the past and start trying to find a connection between us. Don't you agree?"

"What about my brother? He was hoping that this revelation would jog your memory or convince you to come back to him."

"I will talk to him, but he will have to move on. I won't deny that I want him, but my duty is to the well being of the city. I gave up my right to choose when I walked through those gates. I have no delusions about that."

"I will do my best to make you happy," Travis says, kissing the back of my hand. "You know that don't you?"

"You already make me happy, Travis. You are the only person in this family who has been consistently kind to me. The love will come, and I am so lucky to have such a good friend to share my life with."

The carriage sways back and forth as we slowly progress down the main road. As we ride, he tells me stories from our childhood. Simple things like running through the halls and playing in the garden. In all our time together, I have never felt closer to him. He seems lighter, less dramatic, and more himself. I guess he was under just as much pressure as the rest of us to play his part.

Midway through our trip, the carriage slows to a stop. I lean my head out of the window to see what is happening, and a small girl with long braided pigtails hands me a white rose. I reach out and take the flower from her, bringing it to my nose to inhale the soft sent. She turns and runs from me as a loud bang echoes through the street.        

"Travis did you hear . . . "

But Travis isn't there to answer. What remains of him is nothing more than a broken shell, slumped down in the seat next to me. Before I can even react, the driver is throwing my door open and dragging me out. The people around us are erupting in screams of terror and disbelief. Travis' lifeless eyes stare back at me as I am pulled away. This can't be real. Travis was the bright light, the best of us all, and now he is nothing more than a puff of smoke, fading before my eyes.

The driver hauls me down the street, throws me through the door of the bakery, and orders me to stay put. I am abandoned in the shop while he leaves in search of help. The warm smell of bread is overpowering, and I claw my way to the bathroom, retching over and over until there is nothing left in me; until I am truly hollow. The tears finally start then, huddled on the floor between the toilet and the sink. I lie there, letting the grief and pain, the shock and devastation run through me. My heart crumbles in a thousand pieces and painful sobs break from my chest. Curling up on the cold floor, I try and imagine his face the way it was, but even now the vision of him in my mind is fading. All that is left of him is bloody and dark.

It's Jack who finds me, pulling me off the bathroom floor and cradling me in his arms. Rocking me gently back and forth, he hums softly. We both know my soul can't find peace so easily, but I cling to him, not as my savior but as a way to dull the pain. I bury my face into his shirt. The soft cotton smells of soap and sunshine, of fresh air and freedom. He is here to save me, but I don't want to be saved. I want to disappear, to just fade into nothing. How am I supposed to go back there? How am I supposed to try and live in that house without Travis?

Pulling a handkerchief out of his pocket, Jack uses water from the tap to wash away the tears, dirt, and blood from my hands and face. The white cloth turns pink as he runs it along my skin, and I cringe at the sight of it. I don't even protest when he kisses the top of my head, too far gone in shock to care. I wore the blood of my friend, how can anything else ever matter? I only wish the feel of his lips could drown the memories that plague me; Travis's beautiful face, the laughter in his voice, his lifeless eyes, and the white rose.

Without a word, Jack picks me up off the floor and carries me outside. He slowly picks his way through the crowd, heading for the gate. The main road is still full of hysterical people, weeping over their lost son, terrified that something like this could happen in their city. They surround our carriage, pushing and shoving in a desperate attempt to reach it. They need to see it for themselves. To see the blood with their own eyes, proof that their illusion of safety has been shattered.

I cry out when we pass the carriage, closing my eyes tight against the sight of it.

"He isn't there," Jack whispers. "The soldiers have already taken his body away."

"Why did they just leave the carriage there? Where are the soldiers?"

"The man who shot Travis made it to the woods behind the Big House. They are searching for him there."

"Where is Grayson?"

"I have no idea. Probably looking for you. I only knew where you were because I was watching. I wasn't close enough to help you, but I saw where the driver took you and got to you as fast as I could."

We make it to the gate, which has been deserted in the chaos. Jack sets me on my feet when we arrive, looking in the windows of the gatehouse.

"Jack, I can't go with you."

"Even after this?" he says, spinning around stunned. "Even after this, you refuse to let me protect you?"

"I haven't even had time to process this!" I cry. "My heart hurts and I'm confused. Someone I love has been ripped from my life, and there isn't anything I can do to make it better. Part of me wants nothing more than to find a new life across the wall, to leave all of this pain behind. That part would go with you, but the other part knows there are people up there that need me. I don't care how dangerous it is, I can't leave them."

"I'm glad to hear it," the General says, stepping out from behind the gatehouse. "I thought for a minute there we would have to arrest you too."

"Sir, this isn't what it looks like," I cry frightened. "This is . . ."

"Jack," he interrupts. "I know."

"How?" I ask, stunned.

"There isn't a single thing that goes on in my city that I don't know about. We have allowed this boy to visit you time and again, hoping he would lead us to the rest of the rebels. If I had only known it would cost me my son . . ."

"You can't believe Jack killed Travis," I say shocked. "Jack, tell him you didn't kill Travis. Tell him!"

"Of course I didn't. All I have ever wanted to do was keep you safe. How would killing him keep you safe?"

"See!" I say, grabbing the front of the General's shirt. "He says he didn't do it. You don't have to arrest him."

"That's where you are wrong, sweetheart," he says, wrapping an arm around my shoulder protectively. "Whether he killed my son or not, and we will get to the truth of that soon enough, he still broke the law by coming into the city."

"Please don't hurt him," I plead. "I know he has done some bad things, but I don't think he is a bad person. I can't bear the thought of anyone else being hurt because of me. I know it doesn't make sense but I care about him."

"You have a big heart, Katherine," the General says, "Don't let that get you in trouble."

"No," Jack says taking the hint. "There won't be any trouble. I will go with you. Don't worry Kat, things will all be sorted out before you know it, you'll see."

The guards escort Jack away as the General helps me into a carriage waiting for us on the main road. The General sits next to me in the carriage. Away from the eyes of his people, his tough façade fades away as he holds me close, lending me his shoulder to cry on.

"I never thought I would have to outlive my children," he says sadly. "I thought losing their mother was the hardest thing I would ever have to go through, and all it did was teach my heart how to grieve, to prepare me for this, the loss of my child."

"Why would anyone kill Travis?"

"I don't think it was Travis they meant kill."

"Grayson was the target." I say, choking back my tears. "Someone found out Grayson was planning to tell me, and wanted to stop him before he could. Why would anyone commit murder just to ensure my marriage? Surely my brother wasn't behind this?"

"I hope not," the general says, shaking his head. "We know it has to be someone from outside the city. Anyone else would have known it was Travis in the carriage instead of Grayson. I could have been rebels, but I just don't see what they would have to gain."

"This is my fault," I say in tears. "I have brought nothing but pain and death on this house."

"We all had a hand in this," the General says, sadly, "but you have done nothing wrong. You shouldn't have been meeting with that boy behind my back, but allowing it to continue still comes back on me."

"Jack didn't do this," I plead. "I know he didn't."

"We will see soon enough, my dear."

We finish our ride in silence, each wallowing in our own despair. When we reach the big house he helps me down, wrapping me up in a fierce hug. Without a word, he walks away in the direction of the stables, taking the curving sidewalk around the big house. I picture him visiting a certain haunted section of the sidewalk, his big frame lying against the cool concrete, his head lying where hers had fallen.

I glide through the big house to my room, thankfully unseen. The house is a tomb, quiet and empty, my footsteps echoing through the massive halls. The mirrors have all been draped and the clocks stopped, immortalizing the moment his heart quieted. The moment ours broke.

The fire is out and the drapes drawn as I walk into my room. The door next to my bed, the one that is supposed to remain locked until the wedding, is wide open. I find Grayson inside, slumped on the floor surrounded by broken glass; a bottle of amber liquid in his hand. I sit next to him, taking his free hand into mine. His grief is a tangible thing, a sharp cold blade between us. I find myself unable to console him, too broken myself to know how.

"It's my fault," he says finally.

"No, it's mine."

"I should have been in that carriage."

"And I am the reason you were supposed to be, and the reason he was. This all comes back to me. You, Travis, Alana . . . everything bad that has happened to this family in the last year has been tied to me. I won't let you take the blame for this, because it's mine. I already own it. Just as surely as I own my name, or this broken heart, I own his death."

"I don't know how to get past this, Kat."

"I am not sure that we can."

We spend the night on the floor, watching our reflections in the glass, trying desperately to find a connection with the haggard people inside. They stare back at us, worn and weary as we huddle together. Another nightmare spent sheltered in his arms.

We wake to the sound of shovels breaking earth as it floats through the open window. Down below, men are digging a hole as wide and deep as the one in our hearts. They will lay our golden boy to rest next to his mother in the garden. Young deaths are so rare that there are no cemeteries inside the city, as its citizens almost never come in contact with the passing of loved ones.

Grayson rolls over on the hard floor and looks at me sadly, before slipping away. He never even asked if Travis talked to me. Tired and sore, I drag myself into my own rooms, hoping my maids can help me pull it together just long enough to endure what comes next.

The sky weeps as we lower Travis into the ground. Staring at the wooden box, I will it open, longing for him to jump out laughing at his clever prank. Pushing aside the juvenile thought, I remind myself he is never coming back. Sweet, kindhearted Travis lies in that box, cold and alone. My chest aches with the knowledge that his smile, his laugh, and all the little things that joined together to make him who he was have been drained away. All that is left is a bruised shell waiting to be buried and forgotten.

The tears of his family mix with the rain as the earth begins to fall on his casket, the men working their shovels to the sound of anguished cries. Mother and son, side by side in death, their matching stones are a permanent reminder of what has been lost.

Laura, Grayson, and I stand hand in hand, watching the dirt as it falls. With every shovelful, the world seems to dim just a little more. The shadows grow, filling our lives, and I am afraid they will haunt our steps forever. Overcome by his grief, Grayson rips his hand from mine and stumbles off blindly in the rain. I run after him, clinging to the back of his coat in an effort to slow him down. He tries to pull away from me and I pull back hard, forcing him to turn around and face me.

Placing my hands on the sides of his face, I pull it to mine. Eye to eye, he is forced to look back at me. He tries to shrug me off, the guilt of loving me too hard to stand. I know what he is feeling because I feel it too. If Grayson had just stayed far away from me, Travis would still be alive.

"Look at me." I plead. "I'm still here, whether it was our fault or not, we can't change what happened. We can't go back. We have to find a way to keep going. Grayson, look at me!"

"I am looking at you!" he cries.

"No!" I say. "Don't just look, see. Forget everything else and just look at me. I am hurting too. Don't run away. Let me help you carry this weight."

The rain pours down harder, soaking through my dress. Grayson pulls me close, touching his forehead to mine for a single moment before letting me go and walking away.

I stand in the rain and watch him go.