Authors: Cassandra Carr
It wasn’t as if she didn’t know where this was going. She’d
known all along, but it seemed no one had given her heart the message this was
a temporary thing. Grabbing a towel, she left the shower without a word to
Paolo and fled into the room, still dripping wet.
He either didn’t think much of it or hadn’t caught on to her
sudden mood change, because as she hurried to dry off and get dressed so she
could flee the suddenly claustrophobic room, Paolo began to sing what sounded
like a ballad in Italian. She was barely holding herself together when he
exited the bathroom a few moments later. As much as she would’ve liked to have
left before he even got done showering, she knew he would wonder why she’d done
that. She just couldn’t have that conversation with him right now.
So she gritted her teeth and told him she needed to do some
research before the event and was planning to sit in the coffee shop
downstairs. He needed to get to the arena and work and she was counting on him
leaving so she could have a good cry. Why their relationship ending was
upsetting her so much, she didn’t know, but she wasn’t ready to face the tour
today. Not yet. Not with her emotions running so close to the surface.
“I might not see you much today then,” he told her when she
apprised him of her plans.
That’s what I’m hoping for. I need to get a grip.
Despite knowing they only had a few short days left together
and that they should make the most of them, Savannah couldn’t bring herself to
hang around the arena all day long. Especially with Paolo working in the back
pens, all it would remind her of was what she was about to lose.
Grabbing her laptop bag and slinging it over her shoulder,
Savannah answered, “We’ll catch up later. You need to go.” She couldn’t meet
his gaze or she would be a goner, and though she saw him frown out of her
peripheral vision, she ignored it. Shutting him out was difficult, but it had
to be done. There was no way she’d be able to think rationally with him right
there.
She took the opportunity to leave while he was still putting
his boots on, knowing he couldn’t exactly run after her. After dropping a quick
kiss to his forehead, Savannah turned and made for the door as if the room were
on fire. “Later,” she called over her shoulder.
A confused-sounding, “Yes, later” was all she heard in
response before she let the hotel room door shut behind her.
Undoubtedly Paolo was now wondering what the hell was going
on, and she knew she was being a coward about this, but Savannah didn’t know
how to handle the revelation that she was falling in love with Paolo. It simply
couldn’t happen. Their lives were on divergent paths. They wanted different
things.
The room was on the fourth floor and Savannah decided to
hoof it rather than risk Paolo catching up with her at the elevators. When she
reached the lobby, she peeked out the door and when she didn’t see anyone
familiar, darted into the bathroom about ten feet away, feeling completely
ludicrous. But until she was sure Paolo was gone she wasn’t leaving that room.
Her phone buzzed with a text message.
Are you all right? I am getting in a cab but I am worried
about you.
Of course he was. Paolo was the sweetest man she’d ever met.
I’m fine. Just getting stressed out about my thesis.
She was, but the partial lie still didn’t sit well with her.
Savannah’s stomach churned as she waited for his reply.
You will do great. I have faith in you.
Wiping away more stupid tears, Savannah tried to decide what
she could say, but finally gave up and just thanked him, telling him she’d see
him later. She turned off her phone and let the tears come.
When her eyes had finally dried up, she spent some time in
the coffee shop finishing mundane tasks like checking email, which she’d been
neglecting with the time she’d been spending with Paolo. She’d been hoping she
could focus her muddled brain on something other than what it was shouting at
her on a loop—you’re in love, you’re in love, and you’re leaving. But it was
not to be, and with a frustrated sigh, she shut down her laptop and decided to
call her sister. It was confession time.
Lesley picked up at her shop after a couple of rings.
“Hey, you busy?”
“Never for my sister.”
“I need some advice.”
“Okay. What’s up?” Lesley’s tone turned serious and Savannah
sighed.
“I have a problem. I think I’m falling for Paolo.”
“Wow.”
“Yeah. Wow. And not in a good way.”
“Why do you say that?”
“He’s part of the tour. I’m going back to school.”
“So what? People do long-distance relationships all the
time,” Lesley argued.
“I know, but seriously. The tour only takes a couple of
months off each year and I think only one of those months is while I’m not in
school either.”
“You could still see each other.”
“How could it be enough?”
“If you work at it and you want it bad enough it could be.”
“Why are you encouraging me about this?” Savannah asked.
“You’re not exactly high on true love.”
“No, but you’re not as jaded as I am. Give it a chance. And
if you decide you really can’t do it, just enjoy him while you can.”
“I wish it were that easy.”
“It
is
that easy. Don’t make yourself sick over it,
honey. You either want him enough to make it work or you don’t believe you can
make it work no matter how much you want him. Either way, your decision is
made.” Her sister paused. “I don’t know if this has helped or not, but I don’t
have anything better to offer. I’m sorry.”
“It has,” Savannah answered, knowing she wasn’t even
convincing herself. “Look, I need to get to the arena. I’ll try to call again
soon.”
Luckily Paolo was nowhere to be found when she got to the
arena and Savannah was able to speak with several riders to ask them follow-up
questions. They had been a candid, informative source of information thus far,
but to really delve deep she needed more data. From what she could see, even
attempting to sit on an angry bull was an incredibly bad, incredibly dangerous
proposition. So really, why did these guys do it? She still didn’t understand
the pull.
One answer finally got a smile and a laugh out of her. A
younger rider who was in his rookie season had offered to answer more
questions, and when she asked him why he risked life and limb day in and day
out, he’d looked at her, cocked his cowboy hat up on his head and said, “It’s
better than sex.”
The kid couldn’t be more than eighteen and the urge to
challenge him was strong. After all, even if he’d been a precocious kid he
couldn’t have been having sex more than a few years and probably with people his
own age. Her own experience, while not vast, had included both bad and good
lovers, and when the sex was really good, she found it hard to believe riding a
bull could be better than that.
But when she repeated what that kid had said to the older
riders, they agreed, saying it was a rush that couldn’t be compared, even to
sex. Savannah had thought there might be a link between the high of sex and of
adrenaline-fueled activities, but until then no one had actually mentioned the
two together. This was one of the reasons she loved neuroscience. You could
always learn something new about the brain.
She stopped Conner and Brady, who’d both just ridden and
were sporting twin grins. “Hey, guys. Can I ask you a couple of follow-up
questions?”
“Sure, darlin’. We were just heading back to the riders’
area to get rid of our equipment,” Conner explained. “We can walk and talk.”
“One of the rookies gave me a new theory today.”
“Let’s hear it,” Brady said.
“Bull riding. Better than sex?”
They both looked startled for a second and shook their
heads, laughing. In unison, they answered, “No.”
Brady went on. “But I’m not surprised a rookie would think
so.”
“Actually it’s been corroborated by several other riders,
young and old.”
Conner grinned. “Poor bastards.”
“Don’t get us wrong,” Brady said. “If we didn’t have a hell
of a lot of fun doing this, we wouldn’t bother. It’s risky every time you get
on that bull and you can get hurt easily. On top of that, it’s really hard on
families and relationships.”
“All true,” Conner agreed.
“But it’s not better than sex.”
“No way.”
She smiled. “Maybe you guys are the only ones on tour having
great sex.”
“Fine by me,” Conner retorted.
“Looks like you and Paolo have been getting along pretty
well.” Brady must’ve seen something in her expression, because he quickly moved
her over to the side and both men flanked her, shielding her from view. “Honey,
I’m sorry. What did I say?”
“Nothing.” Brady looked skeptical and she shrugged. “Really,
it’s nothing. I’m leaving soon. I like him, but it has to end.” Her gaze
skittered away from his and she willed herself not to start crying again.
“Long-distance relationships can work. Look at me and Leah.”
“Yeah, but you guys both travel a lot and have somewhat
flexible schedules. And money to pay for trips to see each other. Paolo’s job
doesn’t even pay right now and I’m living off student loans. I have to be at
school for at least nine months out of every year for a couple of years still.
He has to be on tour ten months of the year.”
Conner put a hand on her shoulder. She looked up at him,
really up—wow, how tall
was
he?—and was caught in his intense gaze.
Whoa.
“If it was easy, everyone would do it, as they say.” He took her chin between
his thumb and forefinger and she let out an involuntary shiver. “If you want
him, if you want this bad enough, don’t let anything get in your way. You hear
me?”
She nodded, unable to force words past the lump in her
throat. When he’d turned those dark eyes on her, power had radiated from him.
It was like an invisible cloak and she could imagine just about
anyone
would do just about
anything
when he unleashed it. No wonder he was such
a good rider. The bulls didn’t dare buck him.
Brady cut in. “Don’t frighten the girl, man.”
Conner grinned and the moment was broken. After releasing
her chin, he leaned down and gave her a kiss on the cheek before whispering,
“You’re good for him and he’s gonna need a lot of support. That’s all I’m
sayin’.”
The two men said their goodbyes and made their way to the
riders’ area as Savannah used the wall behind her to hold her up. Questions
swam through her mind, but her brain couldn’t focus on any one topic. Finally
she dragged herself upright and went to find more riders, hoping she could
quiet the turmoil inside her before she saw Paolo again.
Paolo wiped the sweat from his brow and tried not to think
about Savannah. He’d tried to text her and she hadn’t answered him. It was
entirely possible she was running around trying to get more information for her
thesis, but he still worried about her. She hadn’t seemed right this morning
and he was itching to get off work so they could talk.
He worked for another couple of hours and then was cut
loose. As he hurried through the arena, covered in sweat, bits of hay, and
smelling like the inside of a barn, all he could think of was getting to
Savannah. Until he saw her face and had reassured himself she was all right he
knew he would be on edge.
Savannah’s back was turned to him as she sat on a makeshift
bench scribbling notes as one of the riders talked to her. As he approached,
the guy looked up and waved and Savannah turned around. She looked almost
pained until her face went blank and he wondered if he’d done something wrong.
Earlier he’d chalked up her mood to normal ups and downs, but now he wondered.
As he got closer though, she smiled and moved over. Much as
he wanted to sit and cuddle her, he knew he stank and needed a shower.
“
Cara
, I need to return to the room to shower. Are
you finished for the day or would you like to meet me there?”
She glanced over at the other man, who shrugged and said,
“Go ahead, hon. You know where to find me if you have more questions.” With a
tip of his hat to Savannah and a brief shake with Paolo, the man moved away.
Paolo leaned down and gave her a quick kiss. “I am sorry I
smell so bad. For a job that does not even pay me, this is a lot of work.”
Savannah rose and grabbed her bag, which Paolo promptly took
and swung over his own shoulder. “But are you liking it?”
“I’m not sure.”
“Why not?” she asked as they began to make their way to the
exit.
“It’s fun to be back with the animals, but this really is a
lot of…” He struggled for the right word in English and ended up flexing his
biceps and pointing to it.
“Grunt work?” She grunted as she pretended to lift something
heavy.
He smiled. “Yes, exactly.”
“Maybe you should consider whether you want to do something
like that or be one of the people in charge. Perhaps one of the doctors who
takes care of the animals. I know there are vets who travel with the tour.”
“Yes, that’s true, but that would mean going to university.
I would be starting from the beginning and that would take years. Marco might
not even be on the tour by the time I was done.”
“That’s a possibility, but you can’t run your life according
to what your brother is doing.”
He felt a flash of annoyance. Who was she to tell him what
he should and should not do?
As if she sensed his mood change, she stopped and turned to
him. “I know you guys are close, and I know what you’re saying. I do,” she
insisted when he went to argue. “But he’s got his life and you have yours. You
need to live it on your own terms. That’s all I’m saying. Your brother wants
you to be happy.”
“I know.”
They hailed a cab and Paolo tried to keep to his own side of
the car, apologizing to Savannah once more. She waved him off and they spent a
mostly silent ride back to the hotel. Once they arrived in their room, he
peeled off his clothes, vowing to get laundry done again as soon as possible so
the entire room didn’t start to smell, and hopped into the shower. The hot
water on his aching muscles felt good and he took longer than he normally would
have, letting the water work its magic. When he got out, Savannah had put her
things away and was flipping through channels on the TV.
“Feel better?”
“Yes, much.” He was clad only in a towel, but felt awkward,
as if he should’ve come out dressed or something. Turning his back to her, he
grabbed a soft pair of cotton boxers and a t-shirt and pulled them on quickly.
“What would you like to do tonight?”
She sat back. “I’m not sure.”
Paolo approached the bed slowly. “Do you want to go out? We
could have dinner, just us.”
“That sounds nice. Something quiet would be good. I’m not
used to this much hubbub.”
“Hubbub?”
“I’m sorry,” Savannah replied with a laugh. “Uh, this much
action and noise. I spent a lot of time in my lab, which is quiet, or studying,
which is also quiet. The tour can be a little overwhelming.”
“Why don’t you call the concierge to ask where we can go
while I get dressed?”
Savannah looked him up and down. “I kind of like what you’re
wearing.” Reaching out, she pulled him closer by the elastic waistband of his
boxers. “Yeah, I like this.” Pushing the waistband down to expose his rapidly
hardening cock, she took him in her mouth and his eyes rolled into the back of
his head. He certainly hadn’t been prepared for a blowjob and as waves of
pleasure crashed over him, he moaned.
She let him go long enough to say, “Maybe I’ll just eat
this.” Her hands grabbed his boxers on both sides and pulled down as she licked
him as if she were a sugar fiend and he was an ice-cream cone. When his balls
had been freed, Savannah tilted her head and laved the front of them. Paolo
automatically widened his stance as much as possible with the constriction of
the boxers now at his thighs.
Savannah scooted down on the bed so her head was right about
level with his dick as he stood, leaning heavily on the mattress for support.
Taking first one ball and then the other in her warm, wet mouth, she lightly
suckled each and a groan of pure tortured ecstasy worked its way free. He
wasn’t going to last long if she kept this up, but when he tried to move away
her fingers tightened around his hips, causing another groan to spill forth.
“
Amante
, please.”
She shook her head, her mouth filled by his cock. Paolo
could feel the beginnings of his release concentrate in his balls. His eyes
slammed shut as she moved so she could take him to the root, swallowing around
the swollen head until he gasped and came directly down her throat. Savannah took
all he gave her, and as each aftershock hit, he shuddered. Shortly thereafter
his dick became over-sensitized, his mouth fell open and his head tipped
backward.
He did pull away this time, collapsing in a heap at the foot
of the bed in a vain attempt to get his bearings. By the time he’d collected
his addled thoughts and fixed his boxers, she had made the phone call to the
concierge as he looked on, his vision slowly clearing.
“He made us a reservation for a steak house within walking
distance. We’ll need to leave in about a half-hour to get there on time.”
“Mmm.”
She came into his sightline as he lay there. With a smirk,
she asked him, “Are you all right?”
“I was not expecting that.”
“Did you not want it?”
He snorted. “Not want my
bella ragazza
to give me a
blowjob? That would make me stupid.”
“You’re not stupid, Paolo. I hope you know that.” She sat
and looked down at him. “Stop comparing yourself to your brother. He’s who he
is and you’re who you are. And who you are is great. I wouldn’t change a
thing.” Leaning down, she gave him a quick peck on the cheek. “Now get dressed
before I feel the need to suck your cock again to prove to you how awesome I
think you are.”
“You would do that?” The question came out breathlessly as
his dick began to fill once more. He smiled as he considered the advantages of
still being in his early twenties. Recovery time was among the best of them.
She mock-pushed him off the bed. “Get dressed.”
“Not just yet.” He climbed on top of Savannah and pressed
her into the mattress. “I want this first.” Taking her mouth in a deep kiss, he
tasted himself and somehow it was one of the most erotic things that had ever
happened to him. Idly he wondered if she’d really blow him twice in one night.
That had never happened to him before but sounded incredible. The urge to make
her come hit him like a freight train and he began to pull at her clothes.
“What are you doing?”
“We are not leaving here until you come for me.”
“I’m fine.”
He gave her a skeptical look as he lowered the zipper on her
jeans. “I don’t want you to be fine. I want you to have a silly smile on your
face all the way through dinner and to know I was the one who put it there.”
Paolo yanked until her jeans were in his hands and made
short work of her panties, tossing them to the other side of the bed. Sliding
his hands up her inner thighs, he watched her face as his thumbs brushed over
her already-slick pussy lips. Savannah bit her lip and he shook his head.
“No,
amante
. I want to hear you.” Paolo slid up her
body until he could wedge his shoulders between her legs and buried his face in
her wetness. Humming with satisfaction, he took one long lick and then another.
Savannah’s head was already thrashing side-to-side and when he set up a quick
flicking motion with the tip of his tongue on her clit, she moaned and grabbed
his hair, tightening her thighs around his head.
He loved it when she did that. It was as if she couldn’t
stand to have him anywhere else, and he redoubled his efforts to get her off.
They needed to leave soon if they were going to make their reservation, but
right now his entire focus was on the woman he was pulling every trick out of
his arsenal to please.
Pulling her clit into his mouth, he sucked it, gently
closing his front teeth around the small nub. Savannah went wild, her legs
closing like a vise grip and her fingers pulling his hair so hard it stung. He
ignored everything but trying to make her orgasm last, until finally her grip
on his head loosened. Paolo moved away a bit, and after a light kiss to her
pussy, pushed himself upright. His dick had recovered nicely and his brain was
sending urgent signals for him to slake his lust inside Savannah’s tight
sheath, but that would have to wait.
“We need to get dressed for dinner. I assume we cannot go in
jeans?”
She sat up, her eyes wide. “Oh, Paolo. Do you not want to go
to an expensive place? I didn’t even think…” Her gaze moved toward the window
before she looked back at him. “I can pay.”
Paolo shook his head. “Women do not pay.”
“Isn’t that a little old-fashioned?”
He grinned. “It’s a little Italian.”
“We can go somewhere else.” She rose and bent to grab her
jeans from the floor.
“No. I want a steak.” He slapped her ass. “Put on a dress.”
She spun and regarded him with a raised eyebrow. “I’ll let
you be the man, honey, but only to a point. Don’t push me or maybe I’ll decide
you
need a spanking.”
Deciding keeping quiet was the best course of action, Paolo
walked over to the closet and selected a nicer pair of pants. Spying one of her
dresses, he pointed to it. “Wear this one.”
“Now you’re telling me how to dress?”
“I like that one. You look very beautiful in it. But of
course,
cara
, you can wear whatever you would like.”
Savannah grabbed it off the hanger. “I’m not doing this for
you. I just wanted you to know that.”
He turned so she wouldn’t see the grin on his face. “Of
course not.”
They finished dressing and hightailed it to the restaurant.
Throughout dinner, even though Paolo kept wanting to bring the weird day up, he
found himself ignoring that niggling thought and talking about all manner of
other things. It seemed Savannah was on the same wavelength, as she made no
mention of the strange tension earlier either.
He decided to play things by ear and take his cues from
Savannah, and as they exited the restaurant, she reached over and grabbed his
hand. Maybe everything was fine and he’d made more of a little quirk in her
behavior than he should have. If not, he figured he’d find out soon enough.
With a brief squeeze of her hand, he smiled at her.
* * * * *
Savannah snuck a peek at Paolo as they undressed after
dinner. They’d held hands all the way back from the restaurant, but she wasn’t
sure what to expect now. She brushed her teeth quickly and slipped into bed as
Paolo spoke with Marco on the phone. When he hung up, he went into the bathroom
and she willed herself to go to sleep. If Paolo wasn’t in the mood to have sex,
she didn’t want him to think she was expecting it.
Of course, they only had a short time left together, and the
thought of building more great memories to take with her made her want to push
him a little. She wasn’t usually the aggressor when it came to sex, and the
thought of having him turn her away, whether because he was too sore from
working or because he just wasn’t interested, made her shudder. Of course, she
had
been the aggressor earlier and he hadn’t seemed to mind.
By the time Paolo walked back into the room and turned off
the remaining lights, she’d talked herself in and out of several different
scenarios. In the end, she simply held up the covers so he could get in. When
he did, Paolo instantly rolled over and pulled her to him face-to-face. They’d
spooned but had never slept facing each other, so maybe he was interested.
He tucked a little piece of hair away from her face and she
realized she probably needed a haircut. She got hers cut every few weeks to
maintain the short, choppy style she liked and it had been nearly five. It was
a wonder she hadn’t noticed how much longer it was before he’d made that
gesture.
“
Tu sei la mia bella donna
,” he whispered, still
playing with her hair with one hand as the other was trapped under the pillow.
Savannah smiled. “Why does it turn me on so much when you
speak Italian?”
Paolo chuckled. “Maybe I should do it more often.”
“Maybe you should.” She ran her fingertips down his neck and
over his torso. “What does it mean?”
Tilting her head up, he looked into her eyes and said, “You
are my beautiful woman.”