Vampire Memories #5 - Ghosts of Memories (19 page)

Good God…she’d been using her gift on him just before he’d consented to the memory reading.

But while struggling to regain control of his body, he also regained some control of his emotions, and he noted that the shocked expression on her face was gone now, replaced with…

“Why did you turn her like that?” she whispered. “Were you so afraid of being alone in America? Of not being able to run the game by yourself?”

He couldn’t believe it. Compassion and honest questions were shining from her face. She was genuinely asking him for a reason, and she was willing to listen to the answer. He could play on that. He could play on her pity and her guilt for having seen what she should not have seen. Perhaps nothing had changed after all.

“You were wrong to do that to me,” he said, ignoring her questions. “I thought you were beginning to care for us, for me, and then you rape my mind like that?”

She flinched. He’d known she would.

“You’ve seen things I don’t even want to see,” he went on. “How can I forgive that?”

She moved closer, reaching out but not quite touching him. “Christian, I’m sorry. Please believe me. But I had to do it. You weren’t telling me anything, and you make a joke out of everything, and I needed to see who…what you were before taking you home. I didn’t mean to embarrass you.”

That hurt, as if she was openly acknowledging he had something to be embarrassed about. He glanced away and then felt her hand on his arm.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered again. “But you turned her because you were afraid, didn’t you? Julian was killing your friends, and you were running, and you didn’t know what else to do?”

He knew she needed to hear it, so he said, “I was terrified.” Then he leaned back against the bed. “So do you still think I’m fit company for the others in your underground?”

“I think you’ll do almost anything to get what you want, but so will a lot of people.”

He turned his head and looked at her in surprise. He’d never met anyone like her.

“Do you still want us to stay here?” she asked. “Do you want me at this séance?”

He did. He suddenly wanted it more than anything. She knew almost everything about him, and she was still sitting on the floor talking to him, apologizing to him, begging his forgiveness, practically dying to absolve him of his own sins. He could not remember an exchange that had felt this
real
since the last time he’d spoken with Demetrio. Any remaining shred of anger faded away, and his determination to follow his original plan solidified.

He was keeping Eleisha.

“Yes, I want you there,” he answered, climbing to his feet, still working to get full control of his body again. He fell back into his practiced persona and smiled. “Well, this was quite a little drama, wasn’t it? Is your throat all right?”

She nodded. “I don’t blame you. It was a natural reaction.”

“There’s nothing natural about us, my dear.”

He glanced at the clock, startled to see that several hours had passed. Yet he’d seen so many years of his own existence, as if living them all over again. How long since he’d given Bernadette a thought? He couldn’t remember.

Turning back to the bed, he moved to the end and picked up a pair of slacks, a dress shirt, and a jacket he’d laid out earlier. “Take these for Wade,” he said. “They should fit him.”

She stood there a moment, just watching him, her expression awash with concern. “I really am sorry, Christian. I had to do it. I had to see.”

He didn’t answer. Instead he said, “Remember what I told you. When the show starts tonight, don’t try to read anyone else. Just stay inside my head, and you’ll be able to see everything that’s happening. I want you to feel how this works.”

Without looking at him, she took the clothes for Wade and walked toward the door. “We’ll meet you downstairs.”

He watched her slip out, but his thoughts were already turning over possibilities for what he was going to do next.

Eleisha’s hand was shaking as she opened the bedroom door and slipped out into the hallway. Guilt and worry and confusion were all swirling around inside her head, making her dizzy. Christian was so proud, and she’d just embarrassed him. No, she’d more than embarrassed him. But he was also…
more
than she’d first realized. She wasn’t exactly sure what that meant yet, but there was even more to him than met the eye.

When backed into a corner, he really would do anything to get what he wanted, and she’d best never forget that. But she reminded herself that Philip had once committed acts far worse, and she had no intention of giving up on Christian.

The memories she’d seen were still fresh in her mind, and she couldn’t stop thinking about the differences in how Bernadette had taught him to hunt. They didn’t put their victims to sleep, nor did they replace memories. Rather, they dazed their victims and then simply blurred the memories. Perhaps that was how Bernadette’s maker had taught her. There was so much Eleisha didn’t know about her own kind in the distant past.

But poor Ivory. No matter how desperate Christian had been in the moment, she’d been turned against her will—and so brutally. Eleisha had experienced the same horror herself long ago. As soon as she could, she would try to offer more open friendship to Ivory. They had one thing in common.

As she closed the door behind herself, she paused, just glad to be alone. At least that emotional scene with Christian was behind her now. She could spend a few moments in the bliss of solitude.

But then she turned to head down the hallway, and she froze midstep.

Philip was standing ten feet away, leaning back against the wall, taking in the sight of her gown, hair, and makeup. His arms were crossed, and the muscles in his face were tight.

“I thought you were playing cards,” she said weakly.

“You were gone so long I came looking for you. I knocked on this door, and no one answered,” he said. “So I looked inside and saw you sitting on the bed with him. I knew what you were doing, so I waited out here.”

He sounded so cold that she couldn’t help feeling a fresh rush of guilt, as if she’d been doing something wrong.

“I was just… I was reading his memories.”

“I know.” His eyes moved down to her bare arms, and he motioned to the gown. “Why are you dressed like that?”

Normally, he’d be thrilled if she wore anything besides a broomstick skirt and a T-shirt. But again, for some reason, she felt the need to defend herself. “He said we had to look the part.” She held up the clothing in her arms. “These are for Wade.”

He looked at the clothes for a long moment and then nodded, but his expression was still cold, and she wasn’t quite sure why.

Wade’s jaw nearly dropped when Eleisha came into his guest room carrying some slacks, a shirt, and a sport coat.

The front side of the dress she wore left little enough to the imagination, but when she turned to drop the clothes on his bed, his eyes ran across her shoulder blades. The skirt of the gown fit snuggly to just above her tailbone, and her entire back was bare.

“That’s a new look for you,” he said.

Then he saw that Philip was standing in the open doorway, frowning. The tension flowing from his body was almost visible.

“What’s wrong?” Wade asked.

“Nothing,” Eleisha answered. “But Christian says we need to look the part tonight. Could you put these on?”

As Wade glanced down at the clothes, Philip asked, “Do you need me to help?”

The suggestion that he needed assistance to dress properly for the evening was a tad insulting, but Philip’s tone had been sincere.

“No, I think I can manage to put on some slacks and a dress shirt,” Wade answered, struggling to keep the sarcasm from his voice.

“All right.”

Philip came inside and closed the door. Eleisha turned away so that Wade could change. “I’m sorry we have to rush you like this,” she said, “but we’re expected downstairs. Dinner must nearly be over by now.”

Her words registered, but again, he found himself looking at her back. It was so pale, without a spot or blemish, and her shoulders were so tiny. He glanced at Philip, who didn’t meet his eyes.

Oh well. The show must go on.

Wade changed his pants quickly. “I’m decent now,” he joked, pulling his Blue Öyster Cult shirt over his head and reaching for the dress shirt. Christian’s clothes fit him fairly well.

“Have you eaten anything?” Eleisha asked, turning toward him.

He motioned with one hand toward a side table. “Yeah, Simmons brought me a dinner tray, but he said that Christian had ordered it.”

“How thoughtful,” Philip said dryly.

What was wrong with him? Wade buttoned the shirt all the way to the top and reached for the jacket, but Philip came striding over. “No, don’t button it all the way like that if you’re not wearing a tie.”

Wade sighed and let Philip adjust the shirt. Then Philip picked up the jacket, and Wade slipped both arms in. Philip straightened it and brushed at it with one hand.

“Just like having a valet,” Wade said.

“You wish,” Philip murmured.

“If you two are finished, we really should get down there,” Eleisha said, opening the bedroom door. She sounded edgy.

Wade threw her a questioning glance, but she wouldn’t meet his eyes either.

Instead, she led the way, and both men followed her one floor down, then through the overstuffed living room, and finally though an open archway into a room with a large round table sporting an ornate candelabra.

Vera, Christian, and Ivory were already there, sipping red wine from long-stemmed glasses. There was also a young man in a dark suit, but Wade didn’t notice him much at first. He couldn’t seem able to take his eyes off Ivory tonight, not even during the card game earlier. She had on a low-cut black evening gown that didn’t cover any more skin than Eleisha’s, but whereas Wade had found Eleisha’s state of dress surprising, he had a different reaction to Ivory’s. It made the blood pound in his ears.

She ran her gaze up and down his jacket, and she smiled slightly, raising her glass.

For the first few seconds, he didn’t hear anything that was being said around him. Then he was aware of Vera leading him forward toward the man in the suit.

“Justin, darling, this is Wade Sheffield. Wade, this is Justin Michaels.”

Wade was vaguely aware of shaking the young man’s hand and saying something appropriate, but he had no idea what. He was too busy trying not to stare at Ivory.

Vera finished the introductions, and someone stuck a martini glass in his hand. He drank it for the sake of the alcohol even though he didn’t really like martinis—and he’d never liked olives.

It was only when Christian finally called for everyone to sit down that Wade realized he had absolutely no idea who this Justin Michaels was or why he wanted Christian’s help, and then it dawned on him that Christian probably hadn’t been given any information either.

That was part of the game.

“Sit by me,” Ivory said in Wade’s ear, and he looked down to see her at his shoulder, the small diamond pendant around her neck reflecting candlelight. He just nodded and sat down.

In spite of the fact that she was in such close proximity, he managed to keep his mind clear, and the truth was that he couldn’t wait to see what happened next.

Eleisha sat with Christian on one side and Philip on the other. She was still edgy from her earlier experience with Christian and confused by Philip’s cold demeanor, but she was determined to get through this séance with good grace—and then go put something else on and give this dress back to Ivory.

After reading Christian’s memories, she had a good understanding of how some of this worked. But she’d not yet seen Ivory take an active role as the “conduit.”

Just as she settled in her chair, she felt Christian inside her mind.

Stay with me. Follow everything I do.

Reaching back, she tangled her thoughts with his, and she heard Ivory’s mental voice so clearly.

I am here, too,
Ivory projected.

Eleisha forgot everything else as she allowed herself to become focused on this experience of being connected to them both at the same time—but from inside Christian’s mind.