Untouchable (16 page)

“Yes,” she said simply.

“I love you, Sanura.”

She had heard those words before, uttered by Zeryn in moments of passion, but she had never felt them the way she did now: pure and bright and so true it seemed nothing could ever dull the brightness. “Yes.”

He stopped speaking, but then, they needed no words. They spoke with their bodies, moving with the rhythm of their heartbeats, whispering with the linking of their souls. Sanura was far from an untouched maiden knowing a man’s touch for a first time, and yet in many ways this was a first for her. First choice, first surrender, first love.

“I love you, too,” she whispered as she began to climax once again. “Alix, I love you.”

Again they found blissful release, and then Alix kissed her again. Moments later he was asleep, and she cuddled against him to get her own rest. She was not glad that Princess Edlyn was dead, but she could not help but be happy that circumstances had led her from the path which had been set before her. “I am yours,” she whispered to a sleeping Alix. “I am so very much yours.”

She fell asleep snuggled against his side, and had dreams of
tangitos
and Alix.

VERITY
shivered so hard her teeth clattered. Being wet and cold had been difficult enough when the sun was shining, but now that they walked in darkness, the chill cut her to the bone. Her hair was a matted, undignified mess. Her once-fine blue riding ensemble was filthy, wet, and torn in many places. Her shoes squished. But most of all, she was cold. She dearly hated to be cold!

Only one hand was warm. The hand Laris held in his own.

“How much farther?” she asked.

“I’m not sure,” he said. His voice didn’t crack and flutter as hers did, but he had to be every bit as cold. “If we follow the riverbank, eventually we’ll come to the path your horse took.”

Eventually. That was less than comforting.

He had asked her more than once what had happened to spook her horse, and each time she’d told him she had no idea. At the moment she didn’t care. Cold and miserable and lost, she was so blasted glad to be alive that she didn’t care what had happened.

“I really should thank you again for jumping in after me. I’m not a good swimmer at all.”

“You’ve thanked me enough,” Laris said, his voice affectionate and gentle. He had a nice voice, which made her glad she’d chosen him to be the recipient of the love potion.

She was not only glad to be alive, she was very glad not to be alone in the forest. Critters scurried here and there, though none came too close, and at times her imagination ran away with her. All her life she had heard stories of vicious shape-shifters that lived in the forest, of monsters which owned the night in such dim places, of dark witches who practiced spells much more ominous than love spells and lucky talismans.

“My feet hurt,” she said in a small voice. “Can we rest awhile?”

Laris stopped, turned to her, and without warning lifted her into his arms. She was so surprised, she squealed a little. “I didn’t mean that you should carry me! I’m too heavy.”

“You are not,” he protested.

“My dress alone is heavy, wet as it is.”

“Your clothing is more damp than wet at this point,” he argued.

Verity pursed her lips. Was she going to be forced to purchase an obedience potion as well as a love potion? Laris’s step slowed, but he held her snugly as he moved through the forest. The river rushed to their right. To their left, forest creatures scurried and chirped. Eventually she rested her head on Laris’s fine and equally damp shoulder. To think she had once been willing to let him die for coming to her, when his presence in her tent had been at her initiation. No, if it had come to that, she would not have allowed anyone to hurt him, even though her reputation would’ve been ruined and no matter what Mavise said about her destiny, the emperor would not have chosen her. Emperor Jahn would likely not want to wed a woman who sought comfort in the arms of one of his sentinels, even if that comfort was of a nonsexual nature.

Well, mostly nonsexual.

Of course, she
could
make use of the love potion, if it came to that. It was obviously quite effective.

Before much time had passed, Verity found herself drifting off to sleep in Laris’s arms. Jostled, held precariously, she slept. She even dreamed. She woke momentarily when Laris placed her on the ground in a small and shallow cave which protected them from the wind, but went right back to sleep as he settled himself beside her and took her in his arms. She woke again, just as momentarily, when he hooked his leg around hers in his sleep, as if she might escape if he didn’t hold her fast. She dreamed of being caught in the river’s swift current, but she did not panic as even in her dreams Laris was there.

When she woke again, Laris’s hand was clamped over her mouth, and he crushed his body against hers. For the span of a heartbeat, she panicked. What was he doing? Why?

And then she heard the voices, speaking not far away. Surely hours had passed, but the night remained dark.

“She must be dead!” one man’s voice insisted. “It is only logical.”

“I need proof, not logic.”

This voice Verity recognized. It was that ass, Wallis. She’d show him she was not dead! Laris would not allow her to move, much less speak. He held her tightly, much too tightly. Didn’t he recognize the voices of those from their party? She tried to pat his arm in assurance, but she could barely move.

“The horse threw her into the river, just as I planned.” This time Verity recognized the voice of the sentinel Cavan. She became still.

“A cliff would’ve been better,” Wallis said, sounding very disappointed. “Then we would’ve had a body to present for proof of her unfortunate demise.” He cleared his throat. “The mare carries no signs of the agitating herb you gave it?”

Verity held her breath. Buttercup’s strange actions had been planned! Wallis and Cavan wanted her dead! Her brows knit together. Why would anyone want her dead? She was pretty and sweet-tempered and only a little bit spoiled.

Instead of fighting Laris, she held on a bit tighter. In response he eased the hand that rested over her mouth.

“What of the other sentinel, Laris?” Wallis asked. “Was that his name?”

“The fool jumped into the river to save the girl,” Cavan scoffed. “I knew he was sweet on the girl, but I had no idea he’d give his own life in an attempt to rescue her.”

“What if he
did
save her? What if they’re both alive?”

“Then they will blithely and ignorantly make their way back to us, and we will try again,” Cavan said calmly. “If the girl lives, and I doubt that’s possible, Laris will deliver her to us like the obedient sentinel that he is. Never fear, m’lord. If by some miracle she survived, she won’t last much longer.”

The two men were walking away from the cave now, heading toward the riverbank, where they no doubt hoped to find her battered and broken body. Verity felt a tear slip from her eye. They didn’t even use her name. She was just
the girl
, a nuisance to be dealt with. How dare they?

When all had been silent for a while, and she was certain the men who had tried to kill her were gone, she whispered, “They want me dead!”

“So I heard,” Laris whispered. His body remained atop hers, warm and hard and wonderfully protective.

“They gave Buttercup something which might very well have killed her!”

“It sounds as though the animal is well,” Laris assured her.

“She had better be.” It was bad enough that they’d attemptedto kill her. If they harmed Buttercup... “What are we going to do?”

Laris stroked a strand of horribly mussed hair away from her face. “I will take you to Arthes myself, Lady Verity. You will be safe there. The emperor will protect you.” He kissed her forehead. “He is a good man.” The words were grudging, but seemed honest enough.

“I’m sure he is,” she responded.

At the moment Verity didn’t want or need the emperor to protect her. She had Laris.

THEY’D
gotten an early start, leaving the inn well before first light. Now that Alix had a plan of sorts, he seemed to be in better spirits. There was less turmoil, less of that annoying indecision which made him difficult to read. Sanura smiled as they walked through the forest. She grinned as they rode together on horseback for a while. When they stopped for a break at midday, she kissed Alix for no reason. Not for seduction, not to reach more deeply inside him for the purposes of her gift, not for any reason but that she wanted to kiss him.

Sanura had this nonsensical feeling that all was right with the world, even though logically she knew very little was right. She and Alix might never be able to prove their innocence. The murder of the princess would very likely bring war. Given the opportunity, Vyrn would kill them both. Paki and Kontar would not hesitate to take Alix’s head.

But he loved her. She knew it to be true, because she felt that love so very strongly. Alix had never loved before, not like this. He had never given so much of himself to any woman, yet he gave all of himself to her. And she loved him! Just a few days ago she had wondered if she was capable of love, and here she was awash in its brilliance. She was loved. She loved.

And she was happy, perhaps truly happy for the first time in her life.

It was late afternoon when they stopped to rest the horse and feed the animal another handful of oats. There was a stream nearby where they could refill their waterskin and wash their faces. This time of year in this part of the world, the nights were cool and the days were warm. The land was coming alive with spring. There were wildflowers and butterflies and fresh green buds on the trees, no matter what path they took.

Since leaving her home Sanura had often bemoaned the coldness and the ugliness of this new land, but today, thanks to Alix and the coming of spring, she saw the beauty in this strange place.

After washing her face and refilling the waterskin, she crept up behind Alix. He stood very still in a clearing where his horse grazed, his back stiff, shoulders back and spine rigid. Once again, he was in turmoil so that he was difficult for her to read. She lifted a hand to offer the small comfort of a hand on his back, but his voice stopped her.

“Don’t touch me.”

A chill danced down Sanura’s spine. The change in his voice was subtle, but she heard it. She heard the nuance, the tension. The darkness. She knew, even before he turned to look down at her with those empty dark eyes, that Trystan was back.

“What are you doing here?” she asked, hiding her surprise by keeping her face and her voice calm.

“I told you I was going to reemerge. Didn’t you believe me?” He gave her a chilling smile.

She had been able to summon Trystan and send him away. It was a power no one else possessed, and she wondered if she had that power because Alix had loved her from the beginning.

“Go away,” she said confidently. “I want Alix.”

Unconcerned, he leaned down and placed his nose close to hers. “You can’t have him.”

The confidence in his voice gave her a fright. Was Trystan so strong now? No. She had not been lying when she’d told Alix that he was the strong one, that he was in control. “You cannot stay,” she said.
“Go.”

He reached around and grabbed her long braid, holding on tightly as he yanked her forward. “I’m not going anywhere. ”

She sensed a new strength in him, a new confidence, and it scared her. All her newfound happiness was washed away.

“I have you to thank for this, Sanura,” Trystan said. “You’re the one who weakened his defenses. You’re the one who paved the way for me to emerge once and for all. He was right to fear giving in to you, but you insisted. And you got your way, didn’t you? You seduced him, you made him want what he should not have.” His smile was wicked. “When the one you call Alix broke all his own rules to have you, he knocked down the wall that had kept me under control for more than thirty years. I’ve been struggling all that time, I’ve been fighting to breathe and act and touch and control. My moments of victory were always brief and difficult, but that has changed. I’m free, and it was you who finally let me loose.”

“No!” she whispered.

“And now, thanks to you, I’m going to have everything I want.” He sounded so certain, as if he had not a single doubt.

“What is it that you want?” she whispered.

She had commented before that the slash of his eyebrows and the slant of his eyes could make Alix look demonic, malicious, and even soulless. He looked that way now, as he wrapped her long braid tightly around his wrist and tugged. “Everything that was once his will now be mine.”

“You want all which was Alix’s?”

“No, I want all which was Alix’s as well as all that belongs to the other one.”

“Your brother?”

“
His
brother, more rightly. I have no kin, no bonds of blood, no soul. When
his
brother is dead by my hand, I’ll be emperor.”

She would shake her head, but he held her so tightly, so fast, she could not move her head. “Alix won’t allow that to happen.”

“Alix will soon be entirely gone.”

Sanura almost cried in relief.
Soon
, Trystan said. At least for now, there was still a chance that Alix would once again take control. Perhaps she had not killed the man she loved by making him love her, by tempting him to take what they both wanted. If he didn’t come back, it was her fault—hers and hers alone. She hit his hard chest with the palm of her hand. “Send Alix back
now
!”

The face she loved took on a smug and evil expression as the lips that had kissed her so well whispered once again, “No.”

THE
one she called Trystan caught Sanura up in a grip she could not fight against. He held her tight, and he liked the feel of her body against his. He smiled.
His
body. What wonderful words those were.

There was more than a touch of fear in Sanura’s eyes. She was afraid of him for so many reasons. She didn’t know if he would kill her or fuck her. In truth, he wanted to do both, but for the moment he would do neither. If he joined with her, she would see too much of him, and until the other was entirely gone, that might not be wise. Her Alix was sleeping, pushed deep into the dark place where Trystan himself had lived the vast majority of his life. He didn’t want Sanura to know that there was anything left of that man she loved, and he didn’t want to take the chance that somehow the two of them would join.

For that same reason he would not kill her. If anything would awaken the sleeping one, it would be a threat to his woman.

He wanted Sanura to remain afraid, but he did not wish her to realize that he was more than a little afraid of her.

How much of him could she see? Not as much as if they were lovers, but still, she did see. He did his very best to think only of his strengths, to
feel
only his strengths, so that she would not see his weaknesses.

If he continued to keep the other down, soon the light would be gone. Alix did not have the strength to survive as Trystan had all these years. He would fade away, disappear—and then Trystan would be able to take all that he wanted without fear.

Standing there with that shocked and saddened expression on her face, Sanura eventually stopped asking for Alix. She eventually stopped ordering him to leave. Did she finally believe that the man she loved was gone for good? He hoped so. That would make the coming days much easier.

In order to keep the fear in her alive, he pulled up her skirt and exposed her trembling legs. She gasped, even though the clothing she had worn until so recently had exposed much more. Her body stiffened and she tried to pull away, but could not. He was much stronger than she was, and if he refused to allow her to escape, she would not escape. She was his as surely as Alix was his. They were equally helpless.

He was forced to release Sanura in order to grab the faded underskirt she’d bought from Donia. As soon as his grip loosened, she attempted to run, to pull the fabric from his hands and flee. Trystan held on tightly, and yanked hard to throw her to the ground. She landed hard, her skirt and her braid spilling around her. He stood over her and smiled, and she began to cry silent tears.

“You’re not going anywhere,” he said. He held her in place with the heel of his boot on her midsection, while he tore long strips of fabric from the underskirt.

“What are you doing?” she asked. Her voice trembled.

Trystan ignored her question as he admired the curve of her legs and the rise and fall of her bosom.

“Perhaps tonight you will show me what all the fuss is about,” he said. It wouldn’t do for her to know that he was afraid to have sex with her until he was certain that Alix was entirely gone. “I don’t see how one woman could be any more pleasing than another. You all have the same basic body parts, so any woman will do when the urge for sexual release arises.”

“Tonight?” She sounded both relieved and confused.

Trystan dropped to his knees, straddling the terrified woman. “I would take you now, but we need to make progress while the sun shines. The sooner we get to Arthes, the sooner I can take what should be mine.”

“Nothing should be yours,” she whispered.

Trystan caught up her wrists with a length of the torn underskirt and tied them tightly together. “Alix doesn’t like to see you restrained, but I do,” he explained. “In fact, it gives me great pleasure to see you trussed up so neatly.” He gave the bonds a tug. “Too tight?”

She nodded.

“Good.” When her wrists were well bound, he moved to her ankles and tied them together just as tightly.

When that was done, he lay atop her, placing his face close to hers. He smelled her, felt the crush of her body beneath his. What a shame that he had to wait to make her entirely his.

“I thought you were in a hurry to get to Arthes,” she said.

“I am.”

“Then get off of me.”

Trystan smiled. She no longer asked for Alix because she knew he was deeply buried and as bound as she herself was. So close, he could not help but remember how he had seduced her before, when she’d thought the other was in command. He’d touched her, entered her, felt the squeeze of her body as it took his. He told her one woman was like any other, but that was not entirely true. With blue or golden skin, she was extraordinary. He ground his erection against her. “If I wished to make quick work of you, I would take you now,” he said, “but when I do take you again, it will not be quick, and you will not be fooled for even one moment that your precious Alix survives. He’ll be gone, thanks to you. Thanks to the walls you broke down for me, thanks to the way you forced him to break his strict code of moral conduct. Thanks to the way you seduced us.”

“I did not seduce
you
,” she argued.

“Yes, you did, and whether you’ll admit it or not, you knew I was there, just beneath the surface. You’ve always liked me better than Alix.” He grinned at her as he remembered what they had shared, how she had responded to him. “He’s boring and staid and ordinary. I’m exciting and dangerous, and whether you admit to it or not, you like the danger in me. A woman like you would never be satisfied with the tedious prince.” He leaned down and very slowly raked the tip of his tongue against her throat. She shuddered. She tasted so damn good. “You’d much rather have an emperor who takes that which is his, and you knew I was ready to have my time, to take my life.” He rose slightly and glared down at her. “Admit it, love, you knew fucking Alix would free me. You knew.”

He rose, then took her bound hands and pulled her to her feet. Not caring if she fell or not, he dragged her toward the waiting horse. Even with Sanura bound and carried across his lap, they could be in Arthes in two days if he rode hard enough.

“Wait,
wait
!” Sanura shouted. “Let me stand for a moment and get my bearings.”

“Why?” he barked.

“Because if you don’t, I will likely throw up on you and the horse. I hit the ground too hard. My head aches and my stomach is roiling. Give me one moment to calm my insides and compose myself. Please.”

He did not want to be retched upon, so he did as she asked and stood her on her feet. It wasn’t as if she could run with her ankles bound as they were.

Standing, she found the nerve to look him in the eye. The fear remained, but so did a hint of defiance. He didn’t like the defiance, but he was sure it would not last long. A few hours of riding tossed over the horse like a sack of horse feed would shake the insolence right out of her.

She studied him for a moment, perhaps trying to see into his heart. Trystan was not worried, as he was pretty sure he didn’t have one, not in the sense which would help this witchy woman in any way.

When Sanura moved, she took him by surprise. Steady on her feet, she swung her bound wrists and slapped the horse on the rump. As she hit the animal, she screamed, letting forth a piercing cry which threatened to deafen him. The animal reared back, and then it ran. Trystan gave chase for a moment, following in the horse’s path and calling for it to return, but it was soon evident that the horse was gone.

He turned, expecting to find his prisoner attempting escape in spite of her bonds. She was not. Sanura stood where he’d left her, her damned defiance more evident than ever. “You whore,” he said as he neared her. “You have cost me days. Days!”

“I know,” she said with serenity.

He raised his hand and curled his fingers into a fist, intent on bringing her to the ground with a blow. When she was down, he’d knife her in the heart, he’d feel the blade slip into her flesh, and he’d watch the life fade from her eyes. Forget the sex, forget the sleeping Alix, he wanted to kill her now.

His arm froze in midair, refusing to swing downward, refusing to strike the woman before him. More than once he tried to send his fist swinging, but his arm would not move. Apparently Alix did not sleep as deeply as he’d thought.

Trystan lowered his arm and pretended acceptance. “It is of no consequence. The horse will return to me as soon as the fright of your attack fades.”

“I doubt that,” she said confidently. “The animal understands that you are not the man he knows. You are not the horse’s master, and though you may look and sound like Alix, you are not him. I know it. The horse knows it. It will not come back.”

“I will simply steal another,” he said, refusing to show his anger. She could not know that the reason he did not kill her for her actions was that Alix would not allow it.

Sanura glanced around, taking in the desolate forest and the abandoned and rarely used path, pointing out without a word that it might be quite some time before he found a horse to steal.

Trystan pulled the dagger from his belt and held it beneath her nose. If she felt fear, she did not show it. If he intended to cut her, the other would know and would stop him, so he did not even think of drawing blood. He only wanted to scare her, and he did.

Trystan dropped to his haunches and threw up Sanura’s skirt. With a swift move, he cut the cloth that bound her ankles. “We will walk instead of riding, thanks to you,” he said.

“I don’t mind walking,” she said.

He rose slowly and tucked his dagger back in its sheath. “Don’t think you won’t pay for this,” he whispered. “One way or another, you will pay.” He grinned at her. “But you won’t stop me.”

HAVING
her hands bound was inconvenient, but it wasn’t as though she was unaccustomed to the circumstance. Queen Coira had insisted on chains whenever Sanura had made an appearance in the Tryfyn court. She hadn’t had to trek over uneven landscapes in the Tryfyn court, however. She’d fallen three times this afternoon, and each time Trystan had only laughed at her as he’d tugged on the rope he’d fashioned from what had remained of her underskirt, a rope with which he led her as if she were the horse he had lost.

She was not as stupid as he thought she was. His arrogance blinded him. His joy at being free overshadowed much of what he should see. He’d wanted to hit her after she’d sent the horse running. He’d wanted very much to kill her for ruining his plans, and as he was so much a primal being, he had been driven by his baser instincts to act. It hadn’t been chance or luck which had saved her. Trystan hadn’t harmed her in any way because Alix wouldn’t allow it.

Alix wasn’t gone.

She repeated those words like a mantra—
Alix isn’t gone. Alix isn’t gone
.—as she marched in Trystan’s wake. It wasn’t her selfishness which had killed him; it hadn’t been her foolish decision to take what she wanted that had meant a defeat by the darkness he had successfully fought all his life. She would save him, somehow. She would bring Alix to the surface, and then she would leave him alone so that Trystan would never again be tempted—not by her.

All along he had known that the two of them together was wrong, that their surrender would lead to disaster. He’d told her many times that she was not his to take. Foolishly, she’d been certain that she could have all that she wanted, that she could embrace this new life and new land and choose the man who would possess her. She’d thought she could choose love. She’d been wrong. Horribly, disastrously, wrong.

Trystan’s darkness made him more difficult to read than most others, but she did see his insecurity quite clearly. He might tell her that Alix was dead, but he did not believe it to be true. Trystan now fought to suppress Alix, just as Alix had fought the shadows for so many years.

Somehow she would save him. She would undo all that she had done in the name of desire and love. Love was never meant to be hers, and she’d been tempting fate to think she could take it, even for a short while.

Trystan would never love. He was incapable of doing anything more than taking what he wanted. Power, sex, food . . . sleep.

In the past, Trystan’s possession, for lack of a better word, hadn’t lasted for more than a few precious minutes. An hour, perhaps. He had never had to sleep, to rest, to let go of his tight rein of control. And yet, his body would eventually require sleep. When Trystan slept, would Alix have the chance to reemerge? While Trystan dreamed, would she be able to call Alix to her?

Sanura looked heavenward. She had always believed in the One God, but in Tryfyn there were those who prayed to many gods and goddesses. One for weather, one for abundanceof fish. One for health, one for the passing of the moon. She could not begin to remember them all.

She did not know if the One God listened to her now or if another god or goddess would hear her prayers. If there were many ancient powerful ones watching over her now, surely there was a god of disaster or a goddess of doomed love.
Please. Please bring him back. I will leave him alone, I promise, if you will only allow Alix to come back.
Tears filled her eyes. So soon after finding love, she had to give it away, she had to deny it.

They walked all afternoon without stopping to rest. Sanura was exhausted, but she did not complain or ask for even a moment to catch her breath. She knew Trystan well enough to know that such requests would only make him angry, they would only make him walk farther and faster.

Trystan finally stopped when there was no more light to illuminate their path. He didn’t mind if she fell, but after he’d taken a couple of painful tumbles over unseen bumps and shallows in the path, he decided it was time to stop for the night.

In one way, Sanura wished they would continue onward, tripping and falling all the way to Arthes. Trystan had said he would take her when night fell. He had promised to hurt her. His body was the same as that of the man she loved, but she did not want him to touch her while Trystan ruled. Still, she braced herself for what was coming as he led her to a small clearing just off the path. He carelessly hitched the other end of the rope that encircled her waist around the low-lying branch of a tree, and then set about collecting wood and building a fire. He ignored her. There were no threats, no jibes, no dark promises as he set about readying the campsite for the night.