UNSHAKABLE (Able Series Book 4) (26 page)

I seek the comfort of my old room knowing full well in a matter of seconds the reprieve I long for will be replaced by another painful confrontation with Damien.

“Listen. . . .” His voice makes me glare back at him, stopping him where he stands. “Take deep breaths, babe. I need you to listen to me now. Think back on what I told you last night.”

His imploring, soft, beseeching voice coats my heart long enough to push the clouds of anger at bay. “What you just saw was staged, Sophia. Joe and your dad are in on it. The reporter who asked me those questions is someone who knows my family really well, specifically my uncle. We needed to set up our break up, and this was the best way for it to be played out. It’s out there for everyone to see my own words being used against me. Your reaction needed to be as authentic as possible for it to be convincing in Bryanna’s eyes. She needs to believe we’re not just setting her up. Remember, I told you that there might come a time where I couldn’t explain myself before shit happens.”

My face softens as his words finally sink in. Regret for slapping him hits me the hardest, then self-loathing for not being in sync with him. Why can’t I get shit straight?

“Ugh! I’m so frustrated right now! Who can live like this? Something is always being set up for a specific result or to fool someone. I know you warned me, but God! I feel like I’m losing my mind because I don’t know when something is real or fake!” I blow out an exasperated breath.

“I’m just as frustrated as you. I don’t particularly enjoy doing this. But in order to get to the bottom of all this quickly, I’ll do whatever it takes. Nicole isn’t alone in this based on the information we’ve gotten so far. We know Bryanna’s connected somehow, which leads us to believe her father is, too. How they’re connected to Nicole and all this is what we’re trying to piece together. You also know we can’t start arresting people without hard evidence. That’s why it’s important that you trust me, implicitly.”

Even with all the information he just said, all that’s running through my mind is when will it all stop? While I’m afraid of what he might face or be up against when he meets his informant, I want to get to the bottom of this.

“I just want it all to end.” I don’t disguise the frustration in voice.

“I want that, too, babe. It’s going to get tricky as we get more information. The information we get will dictate our moves. I may not have the luxury to explain my actions to you before it happens, especially when I’m gone. There’s no way for me to predict how this will all pan out.”

“What about Nicole? Do you think she’s trying to escape? I mean how coincidental that she needed to go somewhere.”

He reaches for my hand, rubbing my knuckles with his thumb. “She’s being watched, but she takes a vacation at this time every year. It’s not out of the ordinary so I don’t think we’ll tail her all the way to Ohio. She’ll keep a low profile and milk the media’s attention for her benefit until she’s told to do otherwise. Don’t worry about her, okay? I’m meeting my source in California in two days. So tonight I’m leaving, and I don’t want to leave you like this.” His worried eyes meet my sad ones.

Not wasting any time Damien pulls me into the hold I love, and I melt into him. I savor our last moments willing time to stop and wishing a magic wand could fix this. I have to think that there are people out there suffering far greater and painful things compared to mine if only to stave off my own hurts.

Lips I know I’ll thirst to kiss find their home on mine, my eager fingers grab onto the body I know I’ll miss to hold, and the nearness of him I know I’ll long for I bottle up, hoping to take small doses each time loneliness sets in.

How long? I don’t want to know. A second of separation is too long. Anything after that will uproot the only seed of hope that this will end quickly, so this moment will stay vividly clear until he comes home.

“I love you,” he mumbles over my lips.

“I love you . . .” I whisper back, and the countdown begins.

Aches
—an emotional soreness that doesn’t go away with time or memories. Its only relief is being in the presence of that person whose absence creates a chasm so wide you ache endlessly.

Pains
—a mental torment that no amount of Tylenol can cure or a lifetime of therapy can mend. Its only elixir is one simple kiss, two strong arms, three words uttered, and the entirety of the man I love.

DAMIEN

As I board the red eye to California, my mind plagues me every chance it gets. What plays in my head like a damn broken record is the image of Sophia when I stepped out of her room. The sadness in her eyes doesn’t match the courage her physical stance embodies. This is killing her just as much as it’s killing me. After our passionate kiss and the promise of always remembering how much we love each other, I left and our separation timer began ticking.

I remember Darcee and Bryanna stopping me as soon as I exit Sophia’s room asking if she’s okay. While Darcee goes inside to check on my wife, Bryanna stays behind making sure to get my side of the story.

“Are you okay, Damien?”

“I will be. I just need time off from all of this. With everything going on, it’s driving both of us insane. It’s to the point that I don’t know what to say anymore.” I state, making sure everyone in the room hears me correctly.

“That’ll be the last time you talk to my daughter in that manner! Do you understand me?” Sophia’s mom yells as I nod in response.

“Take all the time you want,” Sophia’s dad says and walks off with his wife.

I leave before Bryanna can even say another word; otherwise, I might’ve said something that would jeopardize what needs to be done.

The voice of the pilot announcing our arrival in California pulls me back to the present. As soon as I see Lucas, I force a small smile on my face even though it’s the last thing I want to do.

“Glad to finally meet you.” Lucas greets.

“Wish I could say the same thing,” I mumble back.

“I totally get what you’re saying. We’ll find a way to end this, Damien.”

“So, we’re going straight to the hotel?”

“Yeah, unless you want to go somewhere else.”

I look out of the window. Sophia’s face plays in my mind. “No place I wanna be but home.”

After what I said, there’s nothing anyone can say. It spells out loud and clear how much I detest what’s going on. But it’s happening, so I have to forge forward to do whatever it takes to win this. If only I knew who I was dealing with, but damn, I’m blind as a fucking bat.

The moment we get to the hotel, Lucas and I are both in work mode. We set up two cameras in my room equipped with audio. Lucas’ room is where everything will be recorded. He makes a call to the Secret Service’s local office to check in, so I take a break and call my wife.

“Hey, baby.”

“Thank God you got there fine. How are you?”

Hearing her voice eases some of the tension, but not much. Holding her is what kills everything negative inside me. I have to constantly remind myself that she’s the reason I’m here. Why I want this to end.

“I should ask you that. You’re staying with your mom and dad the whole time I’m gone, right? No deviating from the plan. I need peace of mind only if it’s knowing there are more eyes around. And I don’t want you to be alone with Bryanna or Nicole or anyone for that matter. Do you understand?”

“Stop worrying. I’m following your instructions to the letter. Besides, do you think Luke would let me leave or be alone?”

Exhaling loudly I mutter, “So, did we make the late night news?”

“Ha! You could say that. The press bought your leaving the White House without me and going straight to the airport as our official separation—hook, line, and sinker. I wouldn’t be surprised if tomorrow the headlines will say I filed for divorce.”

“Who do I love?” I whisper, my longing for her intensifies a notch.

“Me.”

“Don’t forget that.”

I hate to bring this up, but I just want to escape my reality for just a moment. I want to discuss this while I’m holding her close, in bed after we’ve shared ourselves to each other, but our reality is far from that.

“Damien? Hello? Hey, talk to me.”

Going for broke I confess, “After this I . . .” Pausing again I take in two deep breaths. “. . . . I want us to start a family. I’m done waiting. I’m tired of seeing everyone around me happy with the family they’ve created. I want what they have. I want it so badly, especially now.”

The same timer that started its countdown when I left is the same damn sound my mind hears as silence from her greets me. Tick, tock, tick, tock . . . it rattles in my brain. Not once have we talked about kids, but I never thought she’d have this reaction.

“I. . . .” She manages to croak out one word.

Her reluctance hits my chest like a damn bullet train. Thank God Lucas walks into my room just in time to save my sorry ass from begging. I’m sure he wants to discuss and walk through our plan for the meet.

“Um, I have to go. Lucas is here.” I try to sound unconcerned with her lack of verbal response.

“Oh . . . but I . . .”

“It’s okay, Sophia. We’ll talk about it later.”

“Will you let me finish? Yes, I would like to start a family soon too, okay? Now please stop with the pouting.”

A smile appears instantly on my face with what she just said. My mind blows up snippets of what she’d look like carrying our child, and how crazy overprotective I’d be. I’m on cloud nine, but seeing Lucas standing in front of me brings me back to the reality of my truth. Danger is still too close.

I go to the bathroom to get some privacy. “Thank you, baby,” I can’t even disguise the excitement in my voice. “I don’t know what to say. I’m happy and fearful at the same time.”

She sighs heavily. “No fear, just you and me, remember?”

After a few I love you’s, I reluctantly hang up. Was it hard? Too damn hard.

I find Lucas looking out the window in deep thought. Our training makes sure we take every threat to the President and he’s family seriously. As soon as he feels my presence, he turns around and looks at me pensively. “You say everything you needed to say to your wife?”

I walk toward the window and gaze out as I simply nod in agreement. I’ve been in frightening situations many times, but never have I feared the silence surrounding me. Now with the uncertainty of everything plus our new plan, the stillness doesn’t just shake me, it rocks me.

“It’s always tough dealing with the unknown. It’s a buzz killer, ya know?”

“It sure is, but it is what it is. Everything will fall into place, believe me. It always does.”

A comfortable silence ensues, and the beep from my phone that signals an incoming text, interrupts it.

Meeting moved up. . . . tomorrow same time, same place.

“Fuck!”

“I haven’t said a word! You’ve got to get a hold of your shit.”

“The meeting has been moved up. Instead of two days, he wants to meet tomorrow morning, bright and fucking early.”

“Do you think we’re getting set up? We don’t even know what this guy looks like. I’m calling this in,” Lucas exclaims.

“We’re going in blind to be honest with you. Either something spooked him to move it up, or he’s trying to throw us off.”

He walks toward the door then looks at me. “Get some rest. I don’t want this fucker to pull a fast one on you. I’ll call Dan and let him know what’s up.”

I nod as he walks out. As the darkness and quiet surround me yet again, I open my heart to the One who knows every inch of me aside from my wife. I show Him my fears, my aches, and my pains. I lay it all out there, including my dreams and hopes, wishes and needs, hoping at least one would be given me. As I do, a sense of lightness in my heart covers my being. Before I know it, my alarm blares mercilessly.

Monday, yes, today is Monday. It’s the second day of being away from Sophia.

Exactly thirty minutes before this mystery source shows up, I’m ready to get things started. Lucas and I check and re-check everything before I settle on the chair facing the window, running my hand over my leg to check that the tactical knife is fastened securely.

One knock signals the beginning of the end for whoever is behind all this, but the face that greets me literally almost kills me.

“Damien. . . .”

Aches
—my heart aches in sheer shock seeing the person standing before me, but just as quickly I’m completely engulfed with the silence of the room and the eerie respite of the moment.

Pains
—I don’t feel a thing, but I sure as shit want someone else to feel it.

DAMIEN

“WHAT THE FUCK!” LUCAS YELLS
through the earpiece.

As my eyes bore into the ones looking back at me, I imagine the fastest way I could snap someone’s neck. A different kind of anger and revulsion work their way through my veins knowing the person standing before me has caused problems for my wife and her dad.

“Damien?”

I hear my name again and this time I snap into action. I pull her inside the room and slam her body against the wall. Pure hatred pumps in my veins as my eyes bulge while hers plead for fucking leniency.