Unnatural Acts (21 page)

Herbie followed Mike and his party of half a dozen into a conference room, where they all sat down and Mike switched on a projector. “Gentlemen, this young man in camouflage is Herb Fisher, the corporate counsel for our new division, Strategic Defense.” Everybody waved, and Herbie waved back.

“Now, I’m going to give you an overview of our operations as a company, so you can see the breadth and depth of what we offer.” He put a chart on the screen. “As you can see, we have a number of
subsidiaries: vehicle armoring, communication electronics, security and surveillance systems, computer security and software, and our latest subsidiary, Strategic Defense, which is devoted to the training of security personnel. As you have seen around our new site, we offer a number of kinds of training: personal defense, client defense, firearms, high-performance driving, client relations, emergency medical treatment, and penetration and rescue—more about which later.

“All of you use some of these services now, albeit with our competitors, but I want to show you what full-service security looks like.” He switched to a schematic of an office building. “Let’s say you’re planning a new company headquarters or a large branch, and you’re constructing your own building. Our services begin at the design stage. Our architects help yours lay out your floor space in such a way as to make it difficult to penetrate and easy to defend. Our electrical engineers help design a wiring loom for the building that incorporates wiring for the security system and an abundance of high-definition color cameras and recording systems. We place check-in and check-out areas in the street lobby and on each floor, and each of these desks is able to communicate instantly with your security personnel.

“Those personnel would be trained by us, of course, and we would train your employees to work seamlessly with them to protect your premises, your personnel, and your intellectual property. We divide your parking garage into public and corporate areas and screen every vehicle and driver entering either area.

“Executive personnel would be able to arrive and depart from a secure area, since walking from a car to a building is a vulnerable time. The local police would be invited to cooperate with your on-site security personnel. You’ll get along better with them in an
emergency if they know your people and their practices ahead of an emergency.

“By the time your new offices open we would have brought your security officers to this facility and trained them in a standardized program, so that if they are transferred from one office to another anywhere in the world, their training and operation will be consistent.

“For your highest-level personnel, we will design protective transportation for their use, ranging from a lightly armored SUV to a vehicle very nearly presidential in its strength, and your drivers will be trained in the appropriate vehicles. We will also offer security planning and equipment for top management residences and vacation homes.

“Our flight services division will consult with your people on the selection and purchase of the best aircraft for your needs, whether it be short-hop visits to branches and plants, or ocean-spanning flights to international venues. We can build a hangar for you and establish your corporate flight department for the piloting and maintenance of your aircraft and to oversee the training, both initial and recurrent, for your pilots and airframe, engine, and avionics technicians.

“Our international department can smooth the way for important executives who are relocating, helping them to find suitable, secure housing and schools, as well as furnishing personal protection for the whole family.

“In locations where kidnapping is practiced by local criminals or terrorist groups, we can send in specialists in penetration and recovery, and when that is not possible, we send personnel to negotiate the freedom of personnel being held. Our insurance associate, Steele, offers insurance packages for personnel sent
abroad, which can include kidnapping insurance, making large sums immediately available for negotiation and recovery.

“We are pleased to offer services that none of us has even thought of yet—invented or improvised, as the situation calls for. All our personnel are thoroughly trained for the environment in which they work, at home or abroad. We draw people from the armed services, particularly Special Forces and Navy SEAL veterans, as well as from the FBI, the treasury department, the CIA and NSA, and from police departments in many countries. They are trained to always operate legally in any setting, especially with regard to local weapons laws.

“Finally, when we have designed a top-to-bottom security plan for your company, we will make a comprehensive presentation to your board of directors, demonstrating the cost-effectiveness of each part of our plan.”

Mike then took questions for nearly an hour, then invited the group to lunch in the company mess. Herbie excused himself to take a phone call on his cell.

“Hello?”

“Hi, it’s Cookie.”

“What’s up?”

“You had a call from Dink Brennan a few minutes ago.”

“You’re kidding.”

“I’m not. He asked for an appointment to come and see you when you get back.”

Herbie thought about that for a moment. “Make the appointment,” he said, “and make it early.”

“All right. When are you coming back?”

“I’ll be there Monday morning, first thing.”

“Then that’s when I’ll make the appointment for Dink.”

“Good. Let’s see if he can get up that early. Anything else?”

“I think I’m going to need some help around here,” she said.

“I’ve been thinking about that,” Herbie said. “I don’t want you spread too thin.”

“There’s a woman I know who works here in Accounting that I think would be very good for the things we do. Her name is RoseAnn Faber.”

“I’ll see what I can do,” Herbie said. “See ya.” He hung up and called Bill Eggers.

“Having fun at camp, Herbert?”

“I’m having a lot more than fun, Bill. I just watched Mike Freeman give a presentation to prospective clients that taught me more about Strategic Services than I thought I’d ever know. I think you would enjoy watching, next time he gives it.”

“I’ll figure that out,” Eggers said. “What’s up?”

“I need another secretary,” Herbie said. “Cookie is beginning to drown in the work.”

“That’s not an unreasonable request, given the work you’ve created for yourself. I’ll speak to Personnel.”

“Speak to Accounting, instead,” Herbie said. “There’s a woman working in that department named RoseAnn Faber. Cookie knows her and thinks she’d be good in the job. Then Accounting can speak to Personnel about replacing her.”

“I’ll look into it,” Eggers said. “Are you ever coming back to work here?”

“I never stopped, but I’ll be in my actual office Monday morning.”

“See you then.” Eggers hung up, and Herbie went to lunch.

STONE WOKE
from a deep sleep with somebody shaking him. “What?” he said.

Marla laughed. “You were having a nightmare,” she said, “and talking in your sleep.”

“I remember,” Stone said. “I dreamed you were a Republican.”

She laughed. “I
am
a Republican,” she said. “Didn’t you know?”

“Apparently not, I let you in the house.”

“I take it you’re a Democrat?”

“I’m a Yellow Dog Democrat.”

“What’s that?”

“That’s a Democrat who would vote for a Yellow Dog before he would vote for a Republican.”

She laughed again. “Well, I’m not that dyed-in-the-wool a Republican. I just grew up in a Republican family.”

“You poor girl.” He rolled over and pulled her to him. “I think we have to begin your reeducation now.”

She kissed him. “You mean we’re going to have Democrat sex?”

“Democrat-
ic
sex,” Stone said. “Don’t insult it by mispronouncing the name. That’s the first step in your reeducation.”

“What’s the second step?”

He kissed her. “That’s step two.”

“I can’t wait for step three.”

He gently pinched a nipple.

“I think you’ve just found the start button,” she said. “Can we skip to the final step?”

He rolled on top of her.

HALF AN HOUR
later, they lay, panting and sweating, holding hands. “Does that complete my reeducation?” she asked.

“That’s only the first lesson,” Stone said. “We have a lot to work through yet.”

“Such as?”

“You’ll see, lesson by lesson.”

“I guess it’s good that I seem to have relocated to your house. It saves all those trips through the garden and in the back door.”

“It is good, isn’t it? Even difficult situations can have their bright side.” He rolled over and kissed her. “Where’s that start button again?”

HERBIE WAS
at his desk by seven on Monday morning, and Cookie came into his office, leading another young woman, taller than she and dark-haired.

“Herb, this is RoseAnn Faber,” Cookie said. “She’s going to be working with us.”

“Wow, that was fast,” Herbie said, standing up and shaking her hand.

“It all happened Friday afternoon,” Cookie said.

“Are you glad to be out of Accounting, RoseAnn?” Herbie asked.

“You bet your ass … Excuse me, yes, I’m very glad to be out of Accounting.” The accent had a tinge of Brooklyn.

“And we’re glad to have you,” Herbie said. “I’ve been working Cookie too hard.”

“So she tells me,” RoseAnn said.

“
RoseAnn!
” Cookie said, blushing. “I haven’t been complaining, Herb. I love my job.”

“I know you do, Cookie, because I know how well you do it. RoseAnn, I hope you learn to love your job as well as Cookie does hers.”

Cookie looked at her watch. “Your appointment is probably here now,” she said. “I’ll go see if he’s in reception.”

Both women left, and Cookie came back a couple of minutes later, leading Dink Brennan, who was dressed in a suit.

Herbie shook his hand and sat him down. “I had a call from the director at the farm,” he said.

Dink sat down and accepted coffee from Cookie. “Yes, well, I felt the farm had done all it could for me. You see, I was never an addict, and almost everybody at the farm was. I felt out of place.”

“Have you spoken to your father?”

“We met last week, and I think we both went a long way toward patching things up.”

“I’ve gotten to know him pretty well,” Herbie said. “He deserves better from you than what you were giving him.”

“I can’t deny that,” Dink said. “I’m going to do better by him.”

“Why are you here, Dink?”

“Several reasons. First, I want to apologize to you for being such a handful.”

“Apology accepted. Don’t do it again.”

“Secondly, I’m sufficiently impressed with you that I’m thinking of applying to law school.”

Herbie shrugged. “There are worse ways to make a living, but, as with most careers, it’s only really good when you love doing it. A year in law school to find out if you could love it might be a good idea. Where are you thinking of?”

“Yale. I’ve always liked it there.”

“What are your grades like?”

“Surprisingly good, considering. I have a three-point-eight average, and I might be able to improve on that in my final year. I want to graduate before going on to law school.”

“Let me know if you need any advice.”

“That brings me to my other reason for being here,” Dink said. “I’d like you to represent me as my attorney.”

“You’re a college junior—why do you need an attorney?”

“Because I’ve just come into my inheritance from my mother, which is considerable.”

“How considerable?”

“Thanks to my dad’s brilliant investing over the years, my trust grew from around six million to just under twenty million,” Dink said.

“Is your dad going to continue to invest for you?”

“I’d be crazy not to let him. He’s the best there is. But I think I’m going to want to invest in other things, too.”

“What sort of things?”

“Small businesses that can grow.”

“I have another client—one your father sent me—who is that kind of entrepreneur,” Herbie said. “I’ll introduce you, if you like. You might learn a lot from him.”

“I’d appreciate that,” Dink said. He gave Herbie a card. “This is my address, until I go back to Yale in the autumn.”

Herbie looked at the card. “Nice address.”

“It’s one of two apartments Dad’s firm uses to house out-of-town investors.”

“What are you going to do with your money besides invest it?” Herbie asked.

“I haven’t decided.”

“I once came into a lot of money all at once,” Herbie said, “and I blew a third of it in a year. It’ll take me five or six years to earn that back.”

Dink shrugged. “I’ve already got a nice car. I may have some clothes made, and I’m thinking of buying an apartment in the city.”

“That could be a good investment, Dink. Prices are lower than they were before the recession.” Herbie took a card from a drawer and handed it to him. “This is a good agent, if you’re looking to buy on the East Side or downtown. Those are her specialties.”

“Downtown interests me,” Dink said. “I’ll give her a call.”

“All right, Dink, I’ll be your attorney. Just remember, you can fire me at any time, and I reserve the same right.”

Dink stood up to go. “I hope it won’t come to that on either side,” he said. He shook hands and left.

Cookie came into the office. “So that’s Dink Brennan? He looks awfully normal.”

“Yes, he does, doesn’t he? Let’s see how that goes. Oh, he’s our new client, so you can open a file for him.” He handed her the card. “Here’s his address, until he goes back to Yale in the fall.”

Cookie started back to her desk.

“Oh, and, Cookie?”

She turned. “Yes?”

“Don’t let RoseAnn talk to clients until she learns to watch her language.”

“Gotcha.”

VIV AND ROSIE
stood in Viv’s friend’s apartment and looked around. “It’s not obvious,” Viv said to the tech guy.