Unlovely (26 page)

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Authors: Carol Walsh Greer

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"Nope."

"So, what's up? Can I help you with
something?"

Vanessa's tone was so friendly that for
a moment Claudia wondered if she weren't that bad after all. But only for a
moment. It had to be done. She steeled her resolve.

"Yes, Vanessa, you can help me with
something, as a matter of fact. May I come in, please? I think we need to have
a talk."

“Okay,” Vanessa said, moving aside to
admit her guest. What could Claudia possibly want to talk about? Whatever it
was, it probably wasn't good. Everyone – students, teachers, everyone – had
warned her about Claudia's challenging disposition. "You'll have to excuse
the mess."

Claudia walked into the sitting room,
then turned to assess her hostess. Vanessa seemed to be dressed for bed,
wearing a pair of men's pajama bottoms and a Notre Dame tee shirt. Her face was
scrubbed clean of makeup and her hair was pinned back with barrettes. She
looked fresh, sweet and darling, and to Claudia, that meant she looked dangerous.

Claudia observed her surroundings. The
suite was much the same as her own: a pre-furnished sitting area with a
kitchenette off to the side, a tiny bedroom and a bathroom. It was messy
indeed. There were papers all over the coffee table, books stacked next to the
couch, and dishes piled in the kitchen sink. There was a quantity of slut's
wool in the corners, but then that was no surprise.

"You can imagine how much catching
up I have to do!" Vanessa chattered nervously as she scrambled to clear a
chair of its stack of files. "Here, please have a seat. I mean, of course
I've read all the literature before, but I didn't really have any lesson plans
put together, and you can't just teach everything from memory, right? It's
tricky coming in to pick up where someone else left off. Mrs. Weber left only a
few notes; she's been teaching here such a long time, I guess she didn't need
more than that. She's really an institution here, isn't she? Well, I don't have
to tell you that, do
I
? You've been doing this for a
while now, right?"

Nice. A jab at Claudia's age already.
Claudia felt her blood pressure rise. She was only a few years older than this
girl, but she was having them thrown in her face. So that was how this was
going to go. Claudia smiled as sweetly as she was capable.

"Oh, I know what you mean. I can
easily imagine you'd be overwhelmed. Don't feel bad about it. You're probably
in over your head. No one will judge you harshly for failing."

Vanessa, who had been frantically
pushing papers to the side to clear a space on the coffee table, straightened
to look Claudia full in the face. That sounded snarky. Was it her imagination,
or was Claudia being snarky?

"No, the work isn't beyond me. I
just meant I'm busy." This smile showed fewer teeth than her earlier one.
"Please have a seat. Can I get you some tea?"

"Yes to the seat, no to the tea,
thank you very much." Claudia sat on one of the two easy chairs and
straightened some papers that threatened to fall off the edge of the table.
"Look, I don't want to take up much of your time. I can see you have a lot
going on. I just need to talk to you about a mutual friend of ours."

Vanessa leaned back in her chair and
raised her chin slightly as she watched her guest brush imaginary dust off of
her hands. Claudia noted the guarded look in Vanessa's eyes with satisfaction.

"Yes? Go on. Which friend?"

"I've noticed that you seem to be
showing excessive interest in Peter Tomlinson."

"Peter?" This was unexpected.
What could the connection be between Claudia and Peter? Was she his sister or
something?

"What is excessive interest? I
mean, we've talked a couple of times, I guess. What do you mean by
excessive?"

"Oh, come on, Vanessa. Do I really
have to spell it out for you? You know exactly what I'm talking about."

"No, truly, I don't." Vanessa
felt ill at ease. This had the earmarks of a fight. She didn't want to have an
argument with this strange woman. Why would Claudia want to pick a fight with
her? What did she ever do to Claudia?

"Okay, then. I'll spell it out, if
you'd like. You just arrived here, so perhaps I'm being unfair."

Claudia paused to find the words she
needed, assessing her rival's behavior in order to gauge her sincerity. In the
meantime
,Vanessa
worried. This was
her first real job and it was important to her. She didn't want to get off on
the wrong foot with anyone. What had she done? She searched her memory
frantically.

After a slow blink, Claudia continued,
"Peter and I have an understanding with one another. We haven't been
dating in the traditional sense, nor have we made our relationship public, but
everyone who has been here for any length of time has known to give us space to
let this thing between us develop at its own pace. I'll be frank with you – I
would like to be further along in the relationship than we are right now, but
Peter is a quiet man, accustomed to living alone, and he needs time to feel
comfortable."

Vanessa was stunned into silence. Was
this possible? Could Peter be interested in the woman she saw sitting across
from her? Peter was so funny and warm; Claudia was like a dried autumn leaf.
No, this couldn't be true. Claudia was delusional.

"Do you understand what I'm saying
to you?"

Still no response as the moments clicked
by, just a stare. Finally, Vanessa shook her head and frowned. "No, I
don't think I do."

"Really? Okay then, let me be
blunt." Claudia was exasperated. Could Vanessa truly be so dense? "I
saw you this afternoon in Peter's classroom, leaning close to him, touching
him, giggling like one of the school girls. It was tacky. If I saw it, any of
the students could have seen it."

Claudia paused again for a reaction, but
Vanessa remained dumb and inscrutable.

"I would hate to have to go to your
department chairman about this matter, but I will. The moral development of the
girls is just as important to me as their intellectual development. To be
honest, I'm not sure I shouldn't have gone to her before coming to you. I
wanted to give you a chance to explain yourself, but your silence is making me
doubt my judgment."

Vanessa shook her head. "I don't
know what to say. I don't understand what I did wrong, Claudia. This sounds
like an enormous misunderstanding."

"I don't want there to be a
misunderstanding, so let me speak clearly: you've been comporting yourself like
a whore. You're tarnishing the reputation of a man of whom I'm very fond."

Then it came upon Vanessa in a flash:
she was witnessing some sort of psychological break. It was the only
explanation. This woman was becoming unraveled. Vanessa tried to calm her with
an ingratiating smile, but all Claudia saw was a condescending grin.

"Do you really want to be known as
a slut, Vanessa? Because trust me, that's what you are, and it's only a matter
of time before everyone realizes it."

Finally, a reaction. Claudia watched the
younger woman's face go pale and then livid.

"Wait a minute, Claudia. Just wait
a minute. I can't believe you think I would . . . a slut? Where do you get off
–?"

"Good Lord, Vanessa. Are you really
so daft that you can't form a cogent response? Let me break it down: you can't
hang all over a male faculty member. We don't do that here. If you're feeling
sexual urges that you just can't control, there's a bar about a mile down the
road packed with all kinds of available men. I'm sure you could persuade one of
them to service you. As for Peter . . . well, he can do better."

Vanessa stood up. Delusional or not,
this woman had to go. "That's enough. Get out."

"I'm not going anywhere until we
finish this conversation."

Vanessa walked to the door and put her
hand on the knob.

"Conversation? What conversation? I
haven't said two words to you since you got here, and hardly more than that
since I arrived on campus. You're crazy, Claudia. It's that simple. You're
nuts. A frustrated, stupid, crazy woman. Get out now."

Claudia refused to rise. Vanessa's words
stung a little, but not much. She'd expected some sort of infantile retort.
"I'm crazy? Okay. You can say that if you want, but I'd like you to
address the issue at hand. You seem to be at a loss for words in that
regard."

"My personal life is none of your
business, Claudia."

"Normally, no, and I couldn't care
less about your sexual adventures, but Peter is my business."

Vanessa laughed. It was all so
ridiculous. "Really? Does he know that?"

It was Claudia's turn to be nonplussed.
Laughter seemed an inappropriate reaction. "Perhaps he's never articulated
it, but of course he does."

Vanessa moved away from the door, her
mouth a hard line of fury, and approached Claudia again. She stopped and
studied her visitor's pinched face before speaking through clenched teeth.

"So what you're saying – and please
correct me if I'm wrong – is that I should back off your man?"

Claudia cackled bitterly. "Good
grief, you're vulgar, aren't you? If you need it reduced to the crudest of
terms, then yes. Just leave Peter alone. I've seen your type before and I know
what you do and how you operate. You're cheap – it shows all over you, in the
way you walk and dress and speak. It doesn't matter where you went to school or
where you grew up; cheap just trails you wherever you go, it hangs on you like
a stink. Men, in general, are too stupid to run the other way. I'm sure you've
had lots of experience with that. You've probably slept with many of them. I'm
just telling you to take Peter off your roster. I don't want to get him after
you've passed on whatever disease you're carrying between those little legs of
yours."

Vanessa walked over to Claudia.
"Stand up."

Claudia glared at her, then she stood.

Vanessa drew back her hand and slapped
Claudia as hard as she could across the left cheek.

"You are an ugly, shriveled bitch,
Claudia. Get out of my room."

Claudia blinked back the tears that were
blurring her vision. Finally.

"And you, Vanessa, are now
unemployed. Don't bother finishing those lesson plans."

And reaching over to pick up a notebook
from the counter as evidence of having been in Vanessa's room, she walked out.
She sped down to the ground floor to speak with the assistant headmistress,
while an angry bruise emerged on her triumphant face.

 

Vanessa was gone within three days. She told the
headmistress her side of the story: how Claudia had come to her room with
accusations of promiscuity, called her vile names and refused to leave, but
Claudia denied the whole exchange.

"I was trying to return this binder
and she just started acting like a lunatic, (she must be terribly overstressed
with all of her responsibilities, she can't be faulted for that, surely). She
kept saying that she wouldn't just leave her things lying around campus. She
wondered how I found it or if I'd taken it as some prank, she wanted to know
why I took so long to return it, that sort of thing. Of course, I should have
brought her the notebook right away. That was my fault. I waited until I had
all the girls on my floor settled in for the night before taking it to her. If
I had known it was creating such anxiety in Vanessa, maybe I would have acted
differently. To be fair, that could be an extenuating circumstance in her favor
. . . but, no. She really overreacted. The next thing I know she's tossing
papers all over the place and swearing at me. I didn't know what to do. I tried
to just leave, of course, but she was between me and the door. So I said, (and
I know I shouldn't have said it) that she was acting crazy, and then I was
really foolish and I grabbed her arm to try to get her attention, to get her to
focus and stop acting so irrationally. And then out of nowhere she just reached
up and slapped me. Hard."

Claudia recited her version of events
swiftly and calmly. Vanessa's recitation had been panicked and disorganized. To
the headmistress, something about Vanessa's account rang more true. But Claudia
had been on staff longer, and she was such a quiet sort – what Vanessa
contended was so out of character for her – that the headmistress felt in a
case of she said/she said, the benefit of the doubt must go to Claudia. As
well, of course, there were no circumstances under which one teacher might
raise a hand against another. Vanessa had to go.

Vanessa was allowed to resign rather
than be fired. She was permitted to stay on campus for two days to pack but was
pulled from the classroom immediately; the assistant to the headmistress took
over her duties. Vanessa's students, to be sure, were the true victims here:
they despaired at this point of ever really understanding
The Mayor of
Casterbridge
.
They were told that Miss Foster had
suffered a loss in her family and had to leave for personal reasons. Few
believed this was the true cause of her disappearance, but since no credible
stories to the contrary emerged, she was soon forgotten.

Before leaving, Vanessa took the
opportunity to visit Peter Tomlinson one last time.

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