Unlovely (10 page)

"I can't understand why you're
taking so long to agree. It's very perplexing," Claudia murmured.

"It just seems pointlessly cruel. I
don't understand why you'd want –"

Claudia interrupted brusquely, "I
should think you'd understand pointless cruelty very well, actually, but in
fact, it's all very reasonable. You see, I'm forcing you to make a choice, Jim.
You can ask her to cut off her hair, or you can ignore me and allow her to keep
it long and beautiful. You can save your ass, or you can spare your
girlfriend."

"I thought you didn't want to hurt
her."

"I don't. I wouldn't for the world.
But you would."

Fulko
blinked in
confusion. Claudia sighed, exasperated that he could be so obtuse.

"Okay, here's what it comes down
to: as you've probably guessed, I have another note. It makes me even sadder
than the one I've just returned to you. I haven't yet decided how to act on the
information that's in it. I would hate to have to pass it on to someone
else."

"Okay, I get it. Just go
away."
Fulko's
chin was down now, and he slumped
with defeat.

"No, please let me be clear. Here
are your options." Claudia counted them off, putting up one boney finger
at a time. "First, you could drop Melanie. That would be the easiest thing
to do, and I would feel strongly obliged to give you the note back. Second, you
could try to save your relationship and refuse to ask her to cut her hair, but
then the note would go to the superintendent and you would be forfeiting your
career. Or, third, you could tell Melanie to chop the locks, save your job and
maybe your affair (assuming she goes for it), and then live with the knowledge
that you were willing to hurt her to save your sorry ass."

"This is the craziest thing I've
ever heard. It's just so –"

"Look, it's up to you. I'm fine
with you thinking I'm crazy. Really. I couldn't possibly care less."

Claudia stood, hiked up the waist of her
jeans and walked to the door.

Fulko
appealed to her
compassion one more time. "Don't you see that by putting me in this
position, you're hurting
Mellie
? Any way about it,
she gets hurt."

Claudia paused at the door and turned to
face him.

"Well, that's unfortunately true to
some extent. But, if you do the right thing and break up with her, it won't be
so very terrible. You'll be pulling off the Band-Aid. It will sting for a
moment but then look: all better! It's not like you were going to stick with
her forever, right? I don't see you as a real reliable guy. On the other hand,
if you choose to keep seeing her, you keep inflicting pain on her in all sorts
of ways. That's on you."

"You're a bitch, Claudia."

She smiled beatifically. "Okay. So,
unless you wise up and end this whole affair, I'm going to see a new woman
after Easter, right?"

"I understand."

"All right then," Claudia
said, tapping the door frame thrice with her fingernails and then, to Mr.
Fulko's
great relief, leaving.

Ten seconds later, she returned to pop
her head in the door and say, "Oh! Not a word to Melanie, okay? That would
be bad. No reason not to share the note then."

"Yes, I know. Not a word."

Claudia's head disappeared briefly, then
reappeared.

"Oh! And one more thing: no matter
what you decide with regard to the hair, I assume I can skip the assignment you
gave us for a week from today, right?"

"Yes. Skip it."

"Good," she said, flashing a
wide, sunny smile. "That's a mighty relief. Goodbye, Mr.
Fulko
."

Claudia walked away from the confrontation with her
physics teacher feeling weak, her legs trembling. After gathering her coat and
backpack from her locker she headed to the library, where she was going to have
to hang out until the late bus came at five o'clock. The librarian didn't look
pleased to see her – she was very protective of her books and anxious to get
home, herself – but Claudia ignored her scowl and took a seat at a table in the
back of the room. She unzipped her backpack and took out a notebook to doodle
so she could look industrious to Mrs. O'Brien while giving herself time to
think.

Claudia had no idea what
Fulko
was going to do.

She had thought long and hard before
approaching him. She'd even prayed about it, and since time had only served to
make her more obsessed with the situation and more hostile toward
Fulko
, she'd concluded that she was having an inner
locution from some higher power prompting her to confront him. She'd gone into
the classroom believing her cause was just.

She'd never spoken to an adult in such a
way before. While she was in the moment, she had felt powerful. Now, she felt
scared. Had she done the right thing? What was she thinking, threatening a
teacher?

Claudia took a calming breath and
resolved to be rational. Everyone would come out in a better place in the end.
Something had to be done in this situation, and Claudia was just the instrument
of change. Things couldn't continue as they'd been going, with
Fulko
smugly taking advantage of Melanie, and Melanie
herself growing further and further away from her best friend. Things couldn't
get worse, only better.

She would still have to see
Fulko's
face every day, and his very presence in the school
was a constant irritation, but the new arrangement would do something to
ameliorate it.
 
Not having to speak to
her teacher unless she wanted, and not having to read his tedious notes across
the top of the homework every single day would help.

As for
Fulko
.
. . well, if nothing else, maybe he would wise up about how he conducted his
affairs. It was well past time for him to learn a little common sense.
Fulko
was the kind of man who needed to be reminded that he
was never really operating unobserved. Some people don't have a sense of God in
their lives at all, never develop a moral compass. For those people God sends
someone to represent His all-seeing presence. It would be best if
Fulko
would reform his disgusting ways, but that was
probably too much to ask. After all, Claudia only had two notes as leverage.

The thought of Melanie being hurt by
this, even a little bit, did give Claudia twinges of guilt. In her best-case
scenario,
Fulko
would realize what a mess he was in
and dump Melanie. It would wound Melanie's heart, maybe even break it, but she
would recover and would definitely be better off than she was at present.

Fulko
probably
wouldn't break it off, though, seeing as his brain seemed to be controlled by
his genitals. While Melanie might not be lucky enough to get rid of
Fulko
, she would at least be getting a more cautious mate.
Someone more circumspect, not as silly and stupid.

Or maybe, (and this was an encouraging
thought!) Melanie would dump
Fulko
. That would be
even better: he would tell her to cut her hair off, she would refuse, he would
panic, thinking of Claudia's threat, and order her to do it. Melanie would tell
him to drop dead.

But what if she didn't dump him? What if
she went through with it and cut off her hair? That would be awful. It would
demonstrate how much Melanie was under
Fulko's
sway,
and he would still get to keep his girl. In that case, all Claudia could hope
was that
Fulko
would feel guilty every time he looked
at Melanie, and that Melanie, in turn, would be disappointed and resentful. At
the moment, Melanie believed
Fulko
could do no wrong.
With luck, this incident might develop into a rift.

And if truth be told, as much as Claudia
loved Melanie, it might be good for her to chop off that hair anyway. She would
learn humility in a very gentle way. Don't nuns do something like this to bring
them closer to God? Melanie was only human too, after all, and the truth is
that she had lately become too proud of her appearance, especially her breasts
and her hair. There really wasn't much Claudia could do about getting that
chest under control, unfortunately, but cutting off the hair would go a long
way toward taming Melanie's pride. Maybe this could help her learn to rely less
on her looks and more on her brains and behavior.

The worst thing that could happen would
be nothing.
Fulko
wouldn't break up with Melanie, but
he also wouldn't tell her to cut her hair. Then Claudia would be forced to take
the remaining note to the principal or superintendent, and everything would get
very messy, very fast. The odds of
Fulko
taking a
chance like that seemed slim, but Claudia dreaded the thought of what it would
mean to her friendship with Melanie if he did.

She wouldn't think about it. She would
concentrate on the positive.

And so, ideally, the episode would
conclude with everyone coming out better for it. Claudia had taken an ugly,
painful situation and turned it to good.

Claudia finished most of her homework,
then took the late bus and arrived home shortly before dinner. After dumping
her backpack in the foyer, she followed the smell of marinara sauce to find
Sylvia in the kitchen preparing a salad. Claudia was so glad to be home, so
relieved to have handled the situation and put it behind her, that she popped
over to give her mother a kiss on the cheek. Sylvia smiled and gave her
daughter a wink before Claudia grabbed plates and silverware to set the table.
It was encouraging to see Claudia in a happy mood! She was turning into quite a
nice young woman.

Claudia didn't see Melanie the next day,
but they got together the following morning before Melanie's family headed to
her grandmother's for Easter. There was no indication anything unusual or
traumatic had occurred. In fact, it was quite the opposite. Melanie was in a
wonderful mood, not looking forward to the car ride with her bickering parents
and sisters, but very much looking forward to seeing her extended family.
Claudia worried. Was
Fulko
going to play chicken? Did
he think she wouldn't have the nerve to hand the note over to the
superintendent?

The Milford family celebrated Easter with
Tony's parents and his brother. Claudia didn't even taste the dinner her
grandmother had prepared. She'd spent her time during the sermon at church that
Sunday morning praying that
Fulko
would develop
either a conscience or a nervous ulcer. Anything that would compel him to
buckle.

Melanie was coming back into town that
evening; she would probably see
Fulko
on Monday, the
last day of break. Tuesday was the earliest that Claudia would know what had
transpired. The suspense was eating away at her. Sylvia noticed how distracted
her daughter appeared, but she didn't know how to approach her about it. Sylvia
was much better with smaller children than with teenagers; her early fantasies
of motherhood, in fact, seldom moved passed the toddler stage. Claudia made her
nervous.

The telephone rang at ten o'clock on
Monday night, exceptionally late in the Milford household. Tony and Sylvia were
momentarily stricken – a call at that hour could only bode ill. After letting
it ring three more times, Sylvia answered and was relieved to hear Melanie ask
for Claudia. Something bad had undoubtedly taken place, but it almost certainly
concerned the Stephens family and not her own.

"Hello?" Claudia almost
whispered into the receiver. She was afraid her voice would tremble and betray
her.

"I'm hideous!"

Claudia's heart leaped at the sound of
Melanie's wail.

"Melanie, what are you talking
about?"

"I cut off all my hair."

"What? You did what? Is this a
joke?"

"Believe me, it's no joke."

“Good grief, Melanie. You mean you cut
it all off yourself?"

"No, of course not. I didn't cut
it. Jim took me to a salon and they cut it there," she sniffled.
"It's awful. I look like a boy."

"I doubt that. How short is
it?"

"Short. Like a marine. Oh, Claudia,
I'm so ugly."

"You couldn't be ugly if you tried.
Why did you cut it so short? You never told me you wanted a new
hairstyle."

"It was Jim's idea. He said even if
we went where no one knew us, people might still think I looked too young for
him. He said short hair would be more sophisticated."

Claudia was impressed. Quick thinking,
Fulko
. Let her think it was for the good of the
relationship.

"Well, does he like it?"

"He said he did, but I could tell
he was lying. I'm sure he hates it but he doesn't want to hurt my
feelings."

"No. I don't believe it. If he said
he likes it you can trust him. He's always been straight with you before."

"I guess . . ."

"I just don't know why he didn't
suggest putting it up or something instead of cutting it off. Lots of women
have long hair. Seems kind of a drastic solution to a simple problem."