Unison (The Spheral) (44 page)

“Consider it a gift. The only payment I ask for is that you practice every day.”

“I will.”

“Next time I visit, I’ll bring some lessons along.”

“Thanks, Damon!”

“That is very kind of you.” Genevieve smiled at me. “Be safe on your journey tomorrow.” She left with Michael.

Unbeknownst to me, Wilfrid heard our discussion.

“You truly changed,” he said.

“Into what?”

He laughed. “That you’ll have to figure out on your own.” Wilfrid showed me his deck of cards. “How about we play a game of gin rummy and drink some wine?”

“As long as you promise not to
 
read my future.”

“I promise.”

Wilfrid kept true to his word and even sent me on my way with a rooster and three hens. When I returned to the cabin, Freedomline started up again. My life became peaceful and predictable. After three years, I grew restless and planned a trip to New Athenia. I traded away most of my livestock and contacted Roth to let him know after my next transport, I wouldn’t be returning for a year. Freedomline would have to go on hold while I took a much-needed sabbatical.

RAINSTORM MEMORIES

R
oth feared his appointer was compromised and delayed my transport for another four weeks. The timing was fortuitous. Three days before our rendezvous, I found Flora at the bottom of the ridge. I would’ve missed her had I left for my transport when it was originally scheduled. The re-assimilation process was getting more difficult. When I recognized her, vertigo and nausea forced me to the ground. I rolled to my side, wrapped my arms around my calves, and took slow controlled breaths to ease my stomach. Everything I had for breakfast forced its way out from where it entered. My heart rate increased with each memory that entered into my consciousness, and I couldn’t process the data fast enough.

Six times the fool, six times defeated
, were the first words I thought to myself once I was fully reintegrated. All the preparation and planning I made in my last incarnation failed to awaken me in time to stop myself from inventing Harmony. Wade still took his life, and my next meeting with Flora would probably end in her death again, regardless of what actions I took. I had no control over anything in my life, no advantage over those without a recollection of their past lives. The human-defined reality I relied upon as a scientist now seemed nonsensical. In Unity, we’re taught that chaos exists only outside the dome, but it’s the bedrock on which everything is built. My sense of humor from my previous incarnation returned, and I laughed when I realized we all existed in a giant reintegration chamber, constructing and engaging in illusions to force order where there is none. Had someone else told me this, it would’ve depressed me. Coming up with it on my own had the opposite effect. I needed this shift of perspective to help me endure another round with Flora and Kai.

Shisa cocked her head to the side and stared at me bewildered. “I know what you’re thinking,” I stopped laughing and sat up. “But we’ll make it through together as long as she listens to—”

Flora groaned, and I whispered to Shisa, “The smart thing for us to do would be to leave for New Athenia and avoid the aggravation that’s about to follow.”

Shisa sat in front of me, and I petted her. “Don’t you worry; I never do the smart thing.” I smiled and rubbed my tangled long beard. “Think my Outsider appearance keeps her from trusting me?” I gazed at Flora. “Unfortunately there isn’t enough time for a shave.” I gently cradled Flora in my arms and carried her to the cabin.

I continued my search in the Unitian database for events that took place on 1309-119. As the results presented on one of the public holoscreens, I heard some groans from behind me. I swung around on my chair and faced Flora, who had just regained consciousness. I peered at her for a moment and decided a more playful approach to our conflict might work better—more so for my own benefit.
Nothing else I did worked, so why not? If I have to die again, I’m going to have fun doing it, this time.

I turned around to face Flora, either grinning or laughing in reaction to my previous thought. Judging by her expression, I must have appeared peculiar.

“I know what you’re thinking,” I said, “but we’ve been through this many times, and it always leads to either one or both of us dying.” I sprang up and walked towards Flora. “This time, we’re going to survive together.”

Flora grabbed her plazer and aimed it at me. “Don’t come any closer!”

I froze in place and feigned distress by gasping loudly.

“Put your hands up.”

I slowly lifted both my hands and said meekly, “Please don’t shoot me.”

“Damon 1300-333-1M, you will submit to the Corporate Hierarchy of Unity and refrain from speech until a confessor is present. All words and actions will be used against you in the court of ideals.”

Flora stood, and I stomped my foot on the ground and pushed my palms forward. She fired her weapon, but nothing happened. I reached into my shirt pocket, removed the power supply and showed it to her. “Won’t work without this.” I smiled and fluttered my brows.

Flora sprinted towards the door. I chased after her and pinned her, face first, against the wall. “I lived many lifetimes—so many I almost lost count.” I flipped her around and held her against the wall. “As much as I’m starting to enjoy our first encounters, we must stop this. I’d like to see you past today and into tomorrow.”

“Let me go, and return with me to Unity,” she said calmly. “It’s the only way for you to find peace.”

I gazed into Flora’s eyes and momentarily forgot where I was. “I meant I don’t want to tie you up again. I also mean this cabin.” I released her and stepped back. “I’d like a change of environment this time a—”

Flora tried to push past me, and I shoved her back against the wall.

“Let go of me you slocking Outsider beast!” she yelled. “You’re hallucinating!”

“I’m
not
hallucinating!” I’m—” I slowed my breathing down to regain control. “I’m aware of how absurd I sound.”

“Your appearance,” Flora turned her head away, “and breath isn’t adding to your credibility either.”

“My sincerest apologies.” I moved my mouth close to Flora’s nose. “Had I known a girlfriend from my first incarnation would be visiting my primitive little hovel, I would’ve cleaned myself up and prepared a romantic dinner for two.”

I threw Flora over my shoulder, and carried her out the back door. She flung her arms and kicked her legs, until I stopped in front of the pond.

“What are you doing?” she asked.

“Paying you back.”

“For what?”

“For everything you did and for everything you’re about to do.” I tossed her in.

Flora sprang up and clenched her fists. The way her wet clothes clung to her body made me forget I was angry with her.

“How you look right now reminds me of a day I’ll never forget in my first incarnation. We just finished horseback riding and got caught in the middle of a rainstorm on our walk back to the dome. I can still picture you twirling and dancing around.” I smiled. “When we got to the checkpoint, a Unity Guard lectured us about returning late. That was the first time I wasn’t worried about a visit to reintegration.”

Flora barreled out of the pond. “You’re insane!”

“You said something similar in my past incarnations as well.” I crossed my arms and smiled. “I’ll listen to you go on about the scourge again if you stand there—as you are—for a few minutes more in silence.”

Flora went to punch me, and I jumped out of the way.

“Maybe if you were a little nicer, I’d listen to you,” I said.

“Return with me to Unity.” Flora put her hand on her hip. “
Please
.”

“That is nice—the way you tilt your hip when you do that.”

“I’m not leaving without you.”

“Then prepare to stay with me forever because I’d rather be mauled by a pack of wild dogs than return to Dome Dungeon.”

Flora stared at me, surprised.

“You don’t have authority over me.”

“You assassinated the Overseer,” Flora said.

“Unless I have a Doppelganger that would be impossible. I haven’t been to Unity since I left four years ago.”

“Whatever weapon you used is irrelevant. You were seen.”

“By whom?” I asked trying my hardest not to laugh. “Oh, that’s right—only my
confessor
can give me that answer. The problem is Kai doesn’t want me to answer to the charges. He’ll be here shortly to kill us and call it a murder/suicide.”

“What you think you’re experiencing isn’t real. You must return with me before you enter the next stage of the disease.”

I widened my eyes. “What will happen to me then?”

“You’ll die.”

“Is that all?” I laughed and pushed my hand towards her. “How fortunate death isn’t a permanent condition for me. But you won’t be as lucky. Kai is going to kill you.”

“Why would Kai kill me?”

I shook my finger at her and smiled. “You forgot to mention his title before his name.”

“I can do that when there isn’t anyone else around.”

“That privilege is about to be terminated. Kai now considers you nonessential.”

“Kai values my service. He would never hurt me.”

“Does that mean you enjoyed all those slaps across the face he gave you?”

Flora appeared stunned.

“For a while, I thought you lost your convictions, but you haven’t. I know you agree with me.”

“How could you know anything about me when we have only just met?”

I paused for a moment to think about how to answer. I could’ve continued my present course and told her the truth, but I would’ve risked justifying her belief that I was in need of reintegration. I also could’ve agreed with her assertion that I was crazy, but then she wouldn’t consider leaving with me. There seemed to be no winning, so I walked away. The next move was up to Flora.

I played my violin and noticed Flora’s attentive reflection in the window. What my words failed to do, my music accomplished with ease. Music helps the mind enter a contemplative state, so I continued to play while I spoke to her in a soft voice.

“During each of our encounters, I failed to deliver a convincing explanation of our unique situation,” I said.

Flora crept closer towards me. “Your sickness is going to kill you. That would be a waste for someone with as much talent as you. Please, come with me while there’s still time.”

“You’d feel sick if you discovered your life keeps repeating, and you can’t repair the damage you created in previous lifetimes. You’d feel sick once you realize everything you do is just another drop in an endless well of realities. In my life, everything returns to the same place and starts over again. I can’t escape from who I am…from what I’ve done. If hell exists, that’s where I am, right now.” I stopped playing and put my violin and bow away. “What keeps me going is knowing that if I mess up my life, I’ll have another chance to improve myself.”

“Do you see yourself as improved?” Flora asked, almost sounding sincere.

“Not in the least.” I gathered my binoculars along with the power supply. “Moments before each of my deaths, I focused on one thing I most wanted to change in my life and so far, I failed. Harmony exists, and I can’t stop myself from inventing it because my memory always returns too late. If you believe it sounds more like an excuse than a defense, I deserve your condemnation.” I gave Flora the power supply, walked outside and sat on the porch steps.