Unholy Matrimony (15 page)

They headed to Macy’s first.

“I need a new dress for work,” Flo said as they looked through the racks. “Something that will make Dr. Hacker sit up and take notice.”

Pretty much everything Flo wore made people sit up and take notice, Lucille thought. She ought to just dive into her own closet.

“What do you think of this?” Flo pulled a garment off the rack and held it up to herself.

“It looks a little short,” Lucille said doubtfully. “And isn’t that print a bit . . . loud?”

Flo shook her head. “Animal prints are in, Lucille. You ought to get yourself something in leopard or zebra. It would look great on you.”

“Maybe after I lose a little weight. Right now I’m afraid someone might try to shoot me.”

Lucille followed Flo back to the dressing rooms and sat in a chair while Flo tried on the dress.

Flo pushed aside the curtain and stepped out. “What do you think? I really like it.”

Lucille decided to hold her tongue. “Yeah, it looks great.”

Flo squinted at the price tag. “It’s only thirty-five dollars. I owe it to myself. I need a bit of a pick-me-up.”

Maybe instead of reaching for the donuts every time she was upset she ought to buy herself something new, Lucille thought. On the other hand, that would send them to the poor house for sure.

Flo changed and they found a cashier. There were several people ahead of them so they had to wait on line.

Flo suddenly turned to Lucille and looked her straight in the face.

“What are you staring at?” Lucille took a step backward.

“Don’t move. I’m checking out your skin. It takes awhile for the Botox to work, but I see a difference already.”

“Really?” Lucille had looked in the mirror that morning and hadn’t seen nothing much except that her one eye wasn’t drooping quite as much as it had been.”

“Yes. Your forehead is smoother. And those lines here”—Flo pointed to the sides of Lucille’s mouth—“have almost disappeared.”

“You really think so?”

Flo nodded. “Definitely. What did Frankie think?”

Lucille shrugged. “He wasn’t none too happy about it, that’s for sure. But now that I’m looking younger, maybe he’ll be pleased.”

“The effects are very subtle, Lucille. It’s not so much that you look younger but more like you’re well rested. Like you’ve been on vacation.”

Lucille thought back to the few vacations she and Frankie had had where she’d spent most of her time sweeping the sand out of the cottage they’d rented down the shore or walking the floor with Bernadette that time they’d gone to the Poconos when she was just a baby and was teething. She didn’t think she’d looked particularly rested when she gotten back home either time.

“Next?” the saleswoman called. She was dressed all in black and her hair was pulled back in a severe bun. A pair of glasses dangled from a chain around her neck. She put them on and held out a hand for Flo’s dress.

She punched some numbers into her cash register. “That will be three hundred and fifty dollars, please.”

“What! That can’t be.” Flo reached for the dress and through squinted eyes looked at the price tag. “It says thirty-five dollars, right here.”

Lucille put on her own glasses. “Let me see.” She glanced at the tag. “The lady is right. This here dress is three hundred and fifty dollars.”

“I don’t believe it.”

“You’ve got to get yourself a pair of reading glasses, Flo.”

“Nonsense. I’m not old enough for reading glasses yet.”

Lucille was about to tell her they were the same age, and she was already wearing them, but decided against it. That wouldn’t make no difference to Flo.

Flo reluctantly left the dress behind, and they headed out to the mall courtyard.

Suddenly Flo grabbed Lucille’s arm and pulled her over to look at the display of diamond rings in the window of Zales.

Flo pointed at a diamond solitaire. “That’s the kind of ring I want.”

Lucille laughed. “You got a guy in mind?”

Flo turned toward her, hands on hips. “Of course. Dr. Hacker.”

“Come on, Flo. He hasn’t even asked you out yet, has he? You got to face reality. Guys like that, they want some twenty-year-old in a string bikini and with no opinions of her own. You see it in the papers all the time—all those celebrities where the guy has a paunch and gray hair and the girl is drop-dead gorgeous. What about Richie? Now there’s a guy you could build a life with.”

“He did ask me out,” Flo said, lifting her chin.

“And I hope you said yes.”

“Well, I didn’t.” Flo turned her back on Lucille and began to walk toward the other end of the mall.

Lucille had to trot to catch up with her. “What? Are you crazy, Flo? A nice guy like Richie with a good job? You been all alone for so long, raising a kid and doing a great job. Don’t you want to share your life with someone? Someone you can be yourself with?”

“What makes you think that couldn’t happen with Dr. Hacker?”

Lucille stopped dead in her tracks. “Well, for one thing you keep calling him ‘Dr. Hacker.’ Doesn’t he have a first name?”

Flo whirled around to face Lucille. “Of course he does!”

“Okay. What is it then?”

“It’s . . .” Flo mumbled something.

“Sorry, but I couldn’t hear you.”

“It’s . . . Filbert.”

“Seriously? His name is Filbert Hacker? And his ears stick out, and there’s something really funny about his nose. Come on, Flo, at least Richie is a good-looking guy.”

“Yeah, and he earns a cop’s salary.”

“Well, how much do you need, huh? A roof over your head, food on the table. Between the two of yous, I’m betting you could have a nice vacation down the shore, maybe even a trip to Vegas once in a while. That’s the good life if you ask me.”

A strange look crossed Flo’s face. Like she was actually considering what Lucille had said, but then she changed the subject. “Let’s get some lunch. I’m starving.”

“Me, too. Let’s go to Charley’s. I’m in the mood for a Philly cheesesteak.”

“Isn’t today one of your fasting days?”

“To be honest with you, I’ve lost track. I’ll start over again tomorrow. I’m gonna write the days down on the calendar.”

“That’s a good idea.”

Lucille and Flo placed their order and watched as their sandwiches were prepared.

“Where do you want to sit?”

“Anywheres is fine with me, Flo.”

They found a vacant table and sat down. Lucille took a huge bite of her sandwich. She was starving.

“You got anything new on Donna’s murder?” Flo asked as she spread her napkin on her lap.

Lucille swallowed her bite of sandwich. “Yeah. I had a nice chat with their neighbor, Babs. She said that she and Donna used to be friends once upon a time. And Donna told her that she and Alex were putting something in their will about how if Taylor wasn’t married by the time they died, their estate would go to Donna’s sister instead.”

Flo whistled. “So does that mean that Taylor’s been cut out of the will? Seeing as how both Donna and Alex died before he was married?”

“That’s exactly what I was thinking at first. But Babs did say that she wasn’t sure Donna and Alex had actually gone through with it. Changing their will, that is. What if they hadn’t but Taylor knew they were going to so he killed them both? That’s probably why he didn’t show up for the wedding. He had it all planned in advance.”

Lucille hated to admit that Taylor had used her daughter, but the facts were staring her right in the face. Maybe they figured each of them was getting something out of it—Taylor a wife, and Bernadette a father for her baby.

“I’m sorry, Lucille. I know you was really hoping that Bernadette and Taylor would get married, but you can’t let her marry him now.”

“Of course, we don’t know for a fact that that’s what happened. I wish we could get a look at that will.” Lucille’s eyes lit up. “I bet they kept a copy at the house. We could break in.”

“Just what I need. A trip to the slammer. How would I look in stripes?”

“We won’t get caught. No one’s ever there. Besides, Richie ain’t going to let nothing happen to us.”

“How are we going to get in? Pick the lock?”

“I don’t know.” Lucille frowned. “We’ll have to play it by ear, so to speak.

“I don’t know, Lucille . . .”

“Come on, Flo. We been together since what . . . second grade? We’re like Lucy and Ethel. Or Laverne and Shirley. Or Ben and Jerry.”

“I’m afraid we’re more Abbott and Costello than anything else.” Flo sighed. “But, okay, I’ll come with you. I can’t let you go to jail alone.”

• • •

Fortunately Frankie had his Knights of Columbus meeting over at the church that night. Lucille made him and Louis and Millie a quick bowl of pasta and then put some aside for Bernadette to eat later. She said she wasn’t hungry and was feeling crampy. Lucille felt a rush of panic. There was no way this baby was waiting until Bernadette was married. Even if Taylor didn’t kill his parents, Flo was right. Lucille didn’t want him marrying her daughter.

She had to pin all her hopes on Tony Jr. Last Flo had heard, he was somewhere on an Army base in Germany waiting to be sent home. She just hoped he made it in time and that he and Bernadette would change their minds and agree to get married.

Lucille took off her sandals and put on a pair of sneakers. Who knew what they would be doing at the Grabowskis’ house. She just hoped they could get inside and that it didn’t involve no climbing. Lucille had had a bad experience with that once before and was in no mood to repeat it.

Flo was going to meet her there. They’d planned on parking at the beginning of the street and walking. No point in announcing that the Grabowskis had visitors by pulling into their driveway.

It took Lucille barely five minutes to get to Pine Way. She pulled over to the curb and parked, being careful not to block any driveways. Flo’s red Mustang was already parked slightly further down the street. Lucille wished Flo drove a less conspicuous car, but it was too late to worry about that now.

Flo looked like she’d just come from the beauty parlor—hair just so, lipstick in place, plenty of eyeliner. She was wearing the kind of shorts Lucille still thought of as
hot pants
along with a bright turquoise tank top. Flo was going to be just as conspicuous as her car.

The street was quiet and shadowy, what with all the giant trees lining the sidewalk. They strolled as casually as possible toward the Grabowskis’ house. Lucille’s heart was hammering in her chest. What a time for her to have a heart attack! Hopefully it was just nerves, because she was sure a bundle of them at the moment.

“So do we just walk casually up the driveway to the front door?” Flo asked.

“Not unless you want the neighbors calling the cops. No, we’d better head around back and see if we can find an unlocked window or something.”

They crept down the strip of grass alongside the driveway, hoping the bushes would keep them from being seen.

The Grabowskis’ backyard was deep and ringed by trees and thick shrubs. Covered patio furniture stood on a flagstone terrace and stairs led to a wooden deck.

“First let’s try all the doors and windows just in case,” Lucille whispered to Flo.

They climbed the steps to the deck and tried the double French doors.

“No dice,” Lucille said as she peered through the glass. She could see a gleaming kitchen beyond, not unlike the one in Babs’s house next door.

“What next?”

“Let’s try that door off the terrace.”

Lucille twisted the knob, but that door, too, was locked. “Just our luck Taylor locked up tight before he disappeared.”

“There’s a window.” Flo pointed to a casement window set low to the ground. “Probably goes to the basement.”

“Let’s give it a try.”

Lucille had to get down on her knees to reach the window. To her surprise, it went up easily enough.

“Would you look at that?” She turned to Flo. “This here’s our lucky day.”

“I don’t know about that,” Flo said doubtfully. She pointed to the window. “Why don’t you go first.”

“Sure, sure, I’ll go first.” Lucille studied the window, at a loss as to how to begin. Should she go in headfirst or feetfirst?

“Sit on the edge and slide through,” Flo said impatiently. “Come on, I’m getting nervous standing out here.”

Lucille did as Flo suggested. She stuck her legs through the open window and sat on the sill. She had to bend nearly in half to get the upper part of her body under the partially opened window. She was going to feel it tomorrow, she thought. She’d better rub herself down with some liniment when she got home.

The basement was dark, but Lucille could see that the window wasn’t all that far off the ground. Couple of feet maybe.

“Well, go on,” Flo urged.

Lucille closed her eyes and pushed herself forward, ready to drop to the floor.

“What’s the matter?” Flo asked when Lucille stopped moving.

“I’m stuck. My pants are caught on something.”

“Can you take them off?”

“I don’t think so. Not in this position.” What did Flo think she was? Some kind of contortionist like they had in the circus? “Give me a push, would you?”

Flo put her hands against Lucille’s back and shoved.

There was a loud ripping sound and Lucille shot through the window. She landed in a heap on the basement floor.

“Shit!”

“What’s the matter now?”

“I’ve skinned my knee.”

“Well, we can look for some bandages while we search for the will,” Flo said as she got into position on the sill. “I’m going to get my new shorts all dirty.”

“That’s your fault for wearing white.”

Flo snorted but didn’t say anything. She slid through the window and landed on her feet.

“See? That wasn’t so hard.”

“Not for you, maybe, but I’ve ripped my pants. Look.”

The whole backside of Lucille’s capris was flapping open. “How am I going to go home like this?”

“It’ll be dark by then. No one will see you.”

This time Lucille snorted. “Let’s get going then. And don’t make no noise. For all we know Taylor is asleep upstairs in his bedroom.”

“Let’s hope not.” Flo shuddered. “Did you bring a flashlight?”