Authors: Nancy Mehl
Tags: #FIC042040, #FIC042060, #FIC053000, #Serial murderers—Fiction, #Young women—Fiction, #Mennonites—Fiction, #Violent crimes—Fiction, #Nonviolence—Fiction, #Ambivalence—Fiction, #Kansas—Fiction
We watched Noah talking to a group of people standing outside. They all seemed to be looking in the same directionâthe way John had gone. A couple of them pointed toward the road. I couldn't hear Noah, but after a couple of minutes, their heads began to nod, and the entire group turned and began to walk toward the restaurant.
“Looks like we'll need some coffee,” I said. I reached out and touched Hope's shoulder. “Thank you. You've made me feel better. I'm so glad Levi has your support.”
Hope put her hand on mine. “You have my support as well, Callie. Never forget that. We're family, and we always will be.”
The events of the day had stirred up my emotions and tears filled my eyes. “Thank you. That's the way I see it, but sometimes I'm not sure everyone else does.”
Hope started to reply, but suddenly the front door opened and people began to file in. I left Hope and hurried to the kitchen to get coffee cups and coffee. There was no reason to ask if anyone wanted it. Chapped red faces told the story. I came back with two pots of steaming hot coffee. Hope took one of the pots and served one half of the room while I took care of the rest. The coffee was gratefully accepted by everyone.
After every person had been served, I joined Noah at a table in the corner near the fireplace. “I . . . I can hardly believe what's happened today,” I said, collapsing into a chair. I felt as if my legs couldn't hold me up any longer even though I wasn't physically tired. “Why is it every time I think life has finally straightened out in this town, something happens to stir the pot?”
Noah snorted. “Because the devil doesn't sleep, Callie. Unfortunately, we're in a fight with an enemy who won't admit he's already defeated.”
John's words came back to me:
“When the door is opened, the devil will dance in
.
”
Lizzie came over and sat down next to me. “The important thing to remember is that we have God on our side,” she said gently. “When you understand how much He loves us, and
that He'll never leave us or forsake us, we can face anything with confidence.”
Lizzie's words brought me a measure of reassurance. God had never let us down, even in the face of an unforeseeable enemy. Although we couldn't always predict the devil's attacks, God was never unprepared to help us.
After giving me a hug, Lizzie stood to her feet and stared toward the window. “I wonder how long they'll be.”
“I don't know,” Noah answered. “It depends on whether or not the sheriff gets there before they leave. It could take a lot longer if he questions them.”
Lizzie sighed and went over to talk to Hope, who was looking out the window too.
“Why would he question them?” I asked Noah. “None of them know anything about this.”
“The sheriff doesn't know that, Callie. If the dead woman was murdered, Sheriff Timmons will want to talk to almost everyone in Kingdom.”
“No one who lives here killed that woman,” I said, unable to keep my voice steady. “There are no murderers here.”
Noah sighed and shook his head. “As an elder I've heard things in counseling that shocked me. The devil is the same all over the world. Maybe we've limited the ways he can attack us by removing some of his favorite tools, but temptation and sin will find other ways inside if a heart is open to them.”
His grave pronouncement made me shiver. “Maybe so, but no one in Kingdom would do something like this.”
Noah smiled. “I didn't mean to upset you, Callie. Most of the people in Kingdom are good people.”
I wanted to feel assured by his words, but I didn't. What kind of stories was he hearing in counseling? With a shock I
realized that Levi had to be privy to the same information, but he'd never mentioned anything he heard during his personal sessions with church members. “Levi hasn't told me anything troubling about our friends and neighbors.”
“And he won't. Whatever is said during counseling is private. Not to be repeated to anyone. You know that.”
I started to reply when Lizzie came back to the table. “I wonder how the KBI will react to us. I doubt they have much interaction with towns like ours.”
“The KBI?” I repeated. “I remember Sheriff Timmons mentioning them, but I don't remember who they are.”
“The Kansas Bureau of Investigation,” Lizzie said. “Like the FBI, only in our state.”
I was too embarrassed to ask what the initials FBI stood for, so I just nodded. There certainly had been a lot of initials thrown around today. KBI, FBI, DNA. Seemed to me that living in the world came with its own odd language. One I didn't know how to interpret. Lizzie's time away from Kingdom had obviously afforded her knowledge of things I had no way to understand.
“Well, I can't sit around all day,” Lizzie said. “I've got to start frying some steaks and chicken for supper. It's almost five.”
“I wouldn't count on a big crowd,” Noah said. “I doubt many people will be in the mood to stay in town tonight. Once they get the answers they want, they'll probably head home and lock their doors.”
Lizzie shrugged. “Maybe. But they're just as likely to gather here and talk about it. I want to be ready in case they do.”
She whirled around and hurried toward the kitchen. I nodded at Noah and followed behind her. She pushed the door
open and went over to the refrigerator, pulling out meat that would soon be turned into her famous chicken-fried steaks. I loved the huge refrigerator. Although I doubted Levi would agree to add electricity to our home after we married, secretly I wanted an electric refrigerator like Lizzie's. Maybe not quite so large. Our small refrigerator at home had run on propane, which meant we had to keep our propane tank filled all the time. It wasn't always easy. Sometimes in the winter, after a big snow, it was difficult to get to town to have our tank replenished. After Papa got sick, men from the church helped us, but they had to take care of their own families first. Many times it took a while for assistance to arrive, so we'd store our food in an outside shed. Since it was so cold, the food was just as safe as if it was in our refrigerator. Except for one winter when a group of wild dogs burrowed their way under the shed and carried away all of our meat.
Kingdom was full of animals. Although most of our older citizens weren't raised to think of animals as pets, things had changed over the years. Many thoughtless people dropped off unwanted dogs and cats in the country, and a lot of them, just like the dogs who took our meat, found their way to our town. Those that hadn't turned wild ended up as beloved members of Kingdom families. Even elderly residents who had never had pets when they were young became loving owners. Lizzie had adopted two abandoned cats that lived at the restaurant. The Houslers also had a darling dog, a white cairn terrier mix they'd named Muffin. The dog, dropped off and abandoned on the road to Kingdom, quickly won the hearts of the entire Housler family. Charity and Muffin bonded immediately, so there was never any question that he'd found his forever home. Now the dog slept on Charity's bed
and followed her everywhere she went. Muffin got his name not long after moving in. Lizzie discovered him standing on her kitchen table, eating some of the muffins she'd set out for breakfast. The small dog had already eaten two of them before his thievery was discovered.
Since I lived at the restaurant, the cats and I had become friends. After a while, Lizzie seemed to think they belonged to me. I didn't mind. They were very sweet, and I'd grown fond of them.
One of the cats, Prince, a small calico, lay under the table in the kitchen. He looked completely relaxed. I wondered where the other cat, Dora, a Siamese, had gone to. She was probably upstairs sleeping on my bed.
“Are you okay?” Lizzie had stopped her supper preparations and was studying me.
I sighed. “I don't know. So much has happened today, I'm having a hard time sorting out my feelings. I don't remember ever getting as upset as I did earlier.” I paused and considered what I'd just said. “You know, Lizzie, except for today, I don't recall ever getting really angry. I guess I'm just not that type of person.”
Lizzie looked at me strangely. “Everyone gets mad, you know. It's not a sin, Callie. We just need to deal with it and not allow it to fester.”
“I guess. But I don't seem to be able to let go of this. Maybe it's everything else that's going on.” I shook my head. “I honestly don't know, but I don't like this sensation. It makes me feel . . .” I struggled for the right word but couldn't seem to find it.
“Human?” Lizzie said.
“I hope not. Experiencing this all the time would be terrible. I've already been out of sorts for the past month or
so. Dealing with bouts of uncontrolled anger would be too much.”
“Callie,” Lizzie said softly, “didn't you ever get mad at your father?”
I stared at her in amazement. “Papa? Of course not. I loved him, and he loved me. Why would I ever be angry with him?”
Lizzie crossed her arms and leaned against the counter. “Why would you be angry with him? Because it's normal, Callie. We all get upset with our parents sometimes. Even if we love them. Surely there were difficult times when you were a child.”
“No, not really. When I was young, life seemed so peaceful. Some days I actually wish I could go back to the way things used to be.”
Lizzie frowned. “What are you thinking? Your childhood wasn't ideal. I mean, with your mother leaving and all.”
“Goodness. You're right. Guess I just kind of blocked that out. Papa always did his best to keep our lives on an even keel.”
Lizzie didn't say anything, but her measured silence spoke volumes.
“I know you too well, Lizzie. When you get quiet, something's wrong.”
She turned to look at me, biting her bottom lip. Finally, she said, “I remember our childhood. Even though you were younger, we spent a lot of time together. You lived just down the street from us. I also remember when your mother left. Your father . . .” Lizzie looked away for a moment, as if turning something over in her mind. She murmured something under her breath, but I couldn't make it out. Then her eyes met mine. “Your father treated you like it was your fault your mother ran away. I can't get some of the things he said to you
out of my mind. I recall one day in particular when he and my father were talking in front of us. Your father said . . .” She hesitated again.
I wanted to tell her to stop, but for some reason I couldn't seem to find my voice.
She took a deep breath. “Your father said that he planned to do the Christian thing and take care of you, but he wished your mother would have taken you with her.”
Lizzie's words felt like knife wounds in my heart, and I stared at her in disbelief. “Lizzie Housler! My father never said any such thing! Why would you say something so awful?”
She walked over to where I stood, stopped only a few inches away from me, her dark eyes peering into mine. “Callie, he said it. How could you not remember? There is a part of your soul that you refuse to acknowledge. Look, I know you loved your father, and you took good care of him. But you've forgotten the way he treated you. I see how insecure you are. He's the one who put it there. Sometimes I wonder if you really believe anyone loves you. Even Levi. And he adores you.”
I stepped back from her. “I'm sure you mean well, but you don't know what you're talking about. My father loved me. And Levi loves me. I know he does.” Even as I said the words, I knew they weren't completely true. Hadn't I just been wondering if he was sorry we'd gotten engaged?
“I wish you really believed that,” she said with a sigh. “You've pushed a lot of hurt and anger into a closet in your soul. You think you've locked the door and thrown away the key. Dismissed the past. But I think your reaction to Elmer shows that your closet is too full. It could burst open, and I'm worried about that. Worried about what will happen when
it does.” She reached out and touched my arm. “The past is not so easily forgotten, Callie.”
An emotion I couldn't understand coursed through my body. For some reason, I wanted to lash out at Lizzie. But she was my best friend. How could I?
“You're . . . you're wrong, Lizzie. Dead wrong. Please, I can't talk about this right now. Not with everything that's happening. It's just too much to bear.”
She gazed at me for a few seconds longer and then turned away. “Okay. I'm sorry. Maybe you're right. Knowing there's a body right outside of town has my nerves on edge too. Let's just forget it.” She pulled a huge pan out of the oven, put it on a nearby counter, and lifted the lid. The aroma of meat loaf filled the room.
I was still upset, but I knew I'd have to deal with my feelings. I had no intention of allowing anything to come between Lizzie and me. In my heart, she was the sister I'd never had. Obviously, she was confused. Maybe she'd overheard something as a child and mistakenly related it to Papa. I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that she would never try to purposely hurt me. After deciding to ignore her insensitive comments, I forced myself to say, “That smells wonderful. I know what I'm having for dinner.”
As if nothing had happened, she smiled at me. “You may be eating all of it if no one shows up.” She poked a fork into the large loaf and looked it over carefully. When she was satisfied, she took the fork out, re-covered the pan, and put it back in the oven to keep it warm. “Did you check the salt and pepper shakers?” she asked. “They were looking a little light.”
I sighed. “I started to, but with everything going on, I completely forgot. I'll take care of it now.”
I spun around and hurried out to the dining room. Hope and Noah stood near the front door. Hope smiled when she saw me.
“Callie, will you tell Lizzie I'm going back to the shop for a while? I have a couple of things I want to do, and I know Beau needs to go out. I'll be back in about an hour.”