Undressed by the Boss (Mills & Boon By Request) (39 page)

Her breaths came in short, sharp pants as her mini-rant wound down and she swallowed the sob that bubbled up in the back of her throat.

How she’d craved those things herself, would’ve given anything to have them. While her dad might not have cared
enough about her to grant her wishes, she’d do her utmost to ensure her kids never had to go through what she did.

‘That’s great, Beth, but there’s a lot to say for kids travelling the world, being steeped in new cultures, learning through hands-on life experience rather than a textbook.’

She stiffened as he came up behind her and rested both hands on her shoulders. ‘I should know—I was one of those kids. I loved visiting new places as a kid. I loved the freedom, the buzz. It was one long adventure for a kid and it was great.’

Shaking her head, she blocked out the tiny voice that partially agreed with him, the voice that pointed her to reassess her own memories of her childhood and recognise it hadn’t been all bad.

It
had
been fun discovering new towns.

It
had
been exciting exploring every nook and cranny of the places they’d rented.

And there was no denying she’d gained her adventurous spirit from those times.

But overshadowing the good memories were the bad: the teasing for the new kid on the block, the lack of friends, the constant daily fear that today would be another day she’d come home to find her meagre belongings packed and shoved into the back of her dad’s beat-up van.

She couldn’t subject her kids to a life of uncertainty; it wouldn’t be fair.

With agonising regret, she dropped her head to stare at her shoes, finding little comfort in the sparkly ruby crystals winking up at her from her favourite Mollini flip-flops.

Steadying her weakening resolve, she knew she had to end this right now.

‘We want different things, Aidan. I’m sorry.’

He didn’t move, didn’t speak, and she willed herself to move, to shrug his hands off and take that first, final, inevitable step away from him.

Instead, she stood there, her back absorbing his radiant heat, relishing the weight of his hands on her shoulders, wishing he’d never let go.

After what seemed like an eternity, he bent to murmur in her ear, ‘Life’s an adventure, sweetheart, and I think we both want the
same
thing. The ticket is yours. I leave tomorrow. I’ll wait for you at the gate.’

‘Please don’t.’

Her whispered plea sounded pathetic in the loaded silence and with a gentle squeeze of her shoulders and a tender, lingering kiss on the nape of her neck he walked away.

Leaving her more confused than she’d ever been in her entire life.

Beth stumbled from the gallery in such a daze it took her a full half-hour and a tram-ride to Lana’s house before she realised she still had the plane ticket clutched in her hand.

She’d thrust it into her jacket pocket where it now burned a hole, a reminder of what she could have if she took a chance.

How ironic, that risk was her middle name yet when it came to taking the ultimate gamble—with her heart—she was as yellow-bellied as a low-down snake.

‘You better come in before you wear out my footpath.’

Lana held open her front door and it took Beth a full five seconds to absorb what was different about her cousin.

‘Hey, no crutches!’

Lana did a little twirl, ending in a stumble. ‘Not bad, huh? Almost as good as new.’

‘That’s great.’

‘I thought you’d be happier?’ A tiny worry line creased Lana’s brow and Beth shook her head, knowing she shouldn’t have come here, having no one else to turn to.

‘This isn’t about you.’ Beth gnawed on her bottom lip. ‘It’s about me being a stubborn mule.’

Lana chuckled. ‘Is that all? For a moment I thought it was serious.’

‘It is serious, if you consider me being offered the world by an amazing guy and turning it down serious.’

The worry line reappeared as Lana opened the door wider. ‘You better come in. This calls for chocolate.’

‘It’ll take ten blocks to even begin to cure me.’

‘You’ve been bitten, I see.’

Lana rummaged through her pantry before plonking a family-size block of nougat chocolate on the table and flicking the kettle on.

‘Bitten?’

Beth broke off an entire row of mouth-watering chocolate and stuffed the six small blocks into her mouth at once, hoping the sugar and cocoa fix would ease her pain. It didn’t.

Lana propped against a bench and grinned. ‘By the love bug.’

‘Ha, ha, you’re a real riot.’ She reached for the chocolate again before pushing it away with a groan. ‘What am I doing? Stuffing myself till I’m sick isn’t going to solve anything.’

‘But the endorphins will make you feel better.’

She could think of a much better way to get her endorphins going and it had nothing to do with eating chocolate and everything to do with getting naked with the one guy who had rocked her world.

‘So you fell in love with the boss? Nice.’

‘He’s not our boss any more.’

Lana straightened so fast she knocked a spatula off the bench and it clattered to the floor. ‘What?’

‘He’s going back to archaeology.’

‘But what about the museum?’

‘I’m sure it’s still there. After all, it ran perfectly well before he arrived on the scene, right?’

‘Right.’ Lana nodded, her eyes round orbs behind her glasses. ‘Of course, I’m being silly. A guy with Aidan Voss’s reputation wouldn’t leave the museum in the lurch.’

Lana paused, before snapping her fingers. ‘Oh-h-h … now I get it. That’s why you’re upset? Because he’s leaving?’

Beth shook her head. ‘He asked me to go with him.’

‘What?’

Lana’s screech had Beth reaching for the chocolate again. ‘Oh, my goodness, that’s the most romantic thing I’ve ever heard.’

‘Hold on to your feather boa, Barbara Cartland. I turned him down.’

‘You what? But why?’

‘Because he wants me to leave everything behind here and travel with him.’

Lana frowned. ‘And?’

‘I can’t do it. You know why.’

The kettle whistled at that moment and Lana busied herself making two hot chocolates complete with marshmallows before taking a seat at the dining table and pushing a steaming mug across to Beth.

‘Do you remember what you said the night I got the job?’

Beth took a sip of the hot chocolate and sighed, savouring the slide of rich chocolate across her tastebuds.

‘Honestly, cuz? I don’t have much recollection of what I said that night. As I recall, I was pretty wasted, celebrating
your
dream job.’

Leaning forward and fixing her with the ‘listen up’ glare she’d had down pat since childhood, Lana said, ‘You said you wanted a family of your own. Hubby, kids, the works, but you didn’t want to give up your independence to do it. You still wanted to have fun, be spontaneous, and wished you could meet a guy with a similar outlook.’

‘I said that?’

She hid behind her mug, silently vowing to stay clear of celebratory cocktails no matter what the occasion.

‘There’s more. You offloaded about your dad and how you hated travelling around with him, how the only time you ever felt settled was those times you visited me.’

‘Well, like you didn’t know that already. You were there the whole time—you saw it.’

‘I also saw how you lit up when he came back to get you after those visits, how you talked non-stop about the adventures you’d had together and the places you’d been, how you’d be packed and ready to go each and every time.’

Lana sat back and plucked at the edge of the tablecloth, sending Beth concerned glances from behind her glasses.

‘I think you wanted what you couldn’t have, Beth. All your dad ever wanted was to find happiness after he lost your mum and having you with him made him happy. Couldn’t you see that?’

‘Of course I could,’ she snapped, instantly regretting her outburst when Lana flinched. ‘Look, I’m sorry. I know you’re just trying to help but my dad—’

‘Was there for you, wanted you with him when he could’ve
just as easily palmed you off onto us full time. You are who you are because of him, don’t you see?’

‘No! It’s because of him I can’t do this!’

Her last words came out a sob and she swiped a hand over her eyes, holding up her other hand to stop Lana from hugging her.

‘He spent years and years wandering aimlessly, dragging me with him, in search of goodness knows what. He knew what I wanted, how much I wanted a home, but he put his needs first and I won’t let any man put his needs above mine ever again. It’s masochistic.’

Lana rested her hand gently on Beth’s shoulder. ‘Aren’t you the one who’s always raving on about living life to the fullest, about making the most of every minute? Well, from where I’m standing, looks to me like you’re not living by your own motto. How is shutting yourself off from this amazing opportunity with a guy you really like living life to the full?’

‘I don’t like him, that’s the problem.’

‘Huh?’

‘I love him.’

Her admission came out on a sigh, a heartfelt, soul-deep admission ripped from within.

She’d been a goner from the first time he’d called her Fancy Feet, but she’d done her best to ignore the truth or sugar-coat it in terms like fling and liking him. Whichever way she looked at it, she was in love with Aidan, every impressive, delicious inch of him.

‘So let me get this straight. You love him but don’t want to have the time of your life because he asked you to travel with him?’

I love him.

The three little words echoed through her mind, her heart, reaching down to her soul and making her ache with the joy of it. She loved a charming, warm, sexy guy who was offering her the world … and she’d said no.

Was she nuts?

Maybe she should take a chance? Her heart clenched at the thought, a lifetime of being cautious shadowing her emotions, whispering, It’s not worth the pain.

But she was in pain now, a constant deep-seated ache she couldn’t shake no matter how much she tried to convince herself she’d made the right decision.

She loved him.

It all came back to that.

Did she have the guts to confront her fear, embrace it and take a chance on a once-in-a-lifetime kind of love?

‘Yes, I love him and I’m scared to admit it for fear of playing second fiddle to his needs. Go figure?’

‘But you’re the ultimate risk-taker. I just don’t want to see you cheated out of happiness when this could be the best risk you ever take.’

‘Risk
is
my middle name,’ Beth muttered, a small flame of hope quickly fanned by excitement and anticipation and a wealth of possibilities growing to a raging inferno of optimism in a second.

She could do this.

Why not take the risk of a lifetime on a guy that was so-o-o worth it? A guy who’d tried to compromise, a guy who made her feel safe and secure, something that came from being with him and not in one place.

Security didn’t come from an inanimate building, it came
from being with the man she loved, and as long as they were together she’d always feel safe.

‘Does that mean—?’

‘It means you’re the best cousin in the whole world.’ She leaped from her chair and flung herself at Lana, squeezing her in a bear hug till they both laughed. ‘Now, if you don’t mind, I have some serious packing to do.’

She left Lana shaking her head, a serene smile on her face, and raced out the door, the plane ticket making comforting crinkling noises in her back pocket with every step.

She might have doubt demons dogging her, but it was time to face her fears.

She just hoped it wasn’t too late.

A
IDAN
scanned the dwindling crowd at the gate, his heart sinking with every passing minute.

Beth hadn’t come.

He’d given her an option to have the best of both their worlds, he’d given her his heart and she hadn’t wanted any of it.

Hoisting his duffel onto his shoulder, he handed over his boarding pass, scrounging up a polite smile for the attractive hostess who looked as if she mightn’t be averse to giving him a farewell kiss in lieu of Beth’s absence.

Beth …

Damn it, was he ever going to get over her?

She’d blown into his world like a dervish, a bright, sparkly, effervescent breath of fresh air that made him feel as if he could take on Mount Everest and conquer it with one hand tied behind his back.

She’d made him feel alive, had filled all those tiny holes in his heart he’d barely acknowledged existed.

He didn’t need to do anything to grab her attention, she’d given it unreservedly from the moment she’d bowled up to him with those bizarre feathery black shoes.

He loved her.

And it was over.

Every step down the long causeway was a step further away from her, a step towards closure.

He had his job.

He had his old life back.

And it wasn’t enough.

Clamping his jaw tight, he nodded at the hostess at the door, ready to take his seat, plug his ears with headphones and drown out the world.

‘Excuse me, sir.’

‘Yes?’

What now? The plane had engine trouble? His seat was next to a faulty exit door?

‘You’ve been upgraded to first class. If you’ll follow me?’

Managing a wry smile at the twist of good luck after so much bad, he turned left and followed the hostess.

‘You’re seated in 1A. Enjoy your flight.’

‘Thank you …’

His jaw dropped as he registered the wide, leather seat next to him was taken—by the last person he’d expected to see.

‘Hey there, Professor. Thought you might like some company on a long-haul flight?’

He flopped into the chair, the duffel sliding off his shoulder and plopping at his feet, at a loss for words as he stared at Beth and wondered if she was a by-product of his wishful thinking.

‘This is a surprise,’ he finally managed, trying not to stare at her funky striped midriff top showing a tantalising glimpse of cleavage and her bright orange flip skirt ending halfway up her smooth thighs.