Under the Stars (23 page)

Mama looks down her nose and replies by saying, “Mattie, you’re first. Bath time.”

He jumps off the bed and runs toward the bathroom.

“I’ll grab some clothes for each of you,” I say.

Mama nods, stepping inside and closing the door behind her. The only location I know of to obtain new clothes is the seamstress, and she hates me. If Daphne were here, she might be able to talk some sense into her. But if I’m ever going to get anywhere with Valyad’s people, then I might as well do it now.

“Back so soon?” the seamstress crows when I enter her domain. “Didn’t think we’d be seein’ the likes of you around here.”

“I…didn’t think I’d return. But my family is here, and they have nothing to wear. I’d be willing to pay you.”

She crosses her arms, leaning back in her chair like
she’s
the queen. “I don’t have anything.” The smirk on her face tells me she’s lying.

“What if you joined us for dinner tonight?”

“Busy.”

“Tomorrow?”

Her chair falls forward and she leans across the counter, the smug grin completely wipes from her lips. “I don’t want to join you. Nobody wants to join
you
. I still stand by what I said, and I’m not budgin’.”

“And…everyone feels this way about their new Queen?”

“Everyone,” she confirms.

“Is there anything I can do to change that?”

She snorts. “Yeah, you can leave.”

 
“Very well,” I say, trying not to reveal the slightest emotion. Inside, my stomach feels like it is water, slopping and churning. If there’s nothing I can say that will change the minds of Valyad’s people, then what will I do?

44.

“Find anything?” Mama asks when I return to their room.

“No, unfortunately. I thought our seamstress would have more to choose from, but apparently she doesn’t.”

“That’s perfectly all right. Mattie and I brought extra clothing, if we could just have it washed.”

“Now
that
I can do.” I snatch the items from their bags and toss them down a chute in the wall; it directly corresponds to the room number so the laundry keepers will know where to return it. Until then, they can wear bathrobes.

“When do we get to see the gardens?” Mattie asks.

“As soon as we get some clothes for you, bud. Can’t have you running around naked, can we?”

He giggles, and then blushes. “Noooo.”

“Andy, where is Malik? I haven’t seen him since we arrived and I was hoping to pass along Xara’s hug.”

“He’s been working in the kitchens, and nobody’s allowed in there. When I used to live in this room, Daphne and I would go visit. Oh! You haven’t met Daphne.” Why haven’t I thought of introducing her to my family? She’d love to meet them.

“Did she live with you too?”

“No, she was a maid, but didn’t feel like one. More like a friend. I haven’t seen her since—”

“Since what?”

“Yesterday. I haven’t seen her since yesterday.” I can’t exactly come out and say,
I haven’t seen her since my wedding.

“Well, as long as I can send Xara’s well wishes to Malik, I’ll be happy. I’m sure he’s filled out some since you two left?”

“I guess so. I haven’t really paid attention to whether he’s eating or not. I mean, it’s not like I see him that often.”

No sooner do I finish my sentence when Daphne bounces through the door.

“Oh! Sorry, miss. Didn’t know ya were in ‘ere.”

“Daphne, come here. I want you to meet my family. This is Mama and Mattie.”

“Nice ta meet ya.” She gives them a slight curtsy.

“And you as well. Andy was just telling us you’ve been a dear friend during her stay here,” says Mama. Her eyes catch mine, and I know she knows something.

Daphne’s cheeks glow pink. “I—I guess so, miss. I tried ta.”

I bet Daphne could get those clothes for me. That seamstress won’t know it’s my request. Hopefully.

“Hey, Daph, do you think you could check on their laundry? They didn’t bring many clothes and the ones they have are filthy. I dropped them down,” I say.

“Of course, miss. Be back in a bit.”

“She seems like a nice girl,” Mama says when Daphne exits the room.

“She is. Very,” I confirm. “Hard worker, too.”

“Andy, if you don’t mind, I’d like to speak with you outside.”

I knew this would happen.

Mattie shifts his eyes between the two of us. “Can I go too?”

“No, stay here. It won’t take long,” Mama says.

She and I enter the hallway, the guards bowing as I pass. Like that doesn’t give everything away. She’d be stupid if she doesn’t know.

“Obviously there’s something going on. I don’t want to make assumptions before I’m aware of what’s
really
happening. So, tell me. What is it that I don’t know about? I got your letter. Did you say yes?”

There are so many words I want to say right now, but none of them will form. I open my mouth more than once to begin.

“I…did.”

“And?”

“Zarek insisted we have the wedding sooner than later.”

“How soon?”

I shift my weight from one leg to the other. “Like, yesterday soon.”

“You had the wedding yesterday? Mattie and I weren’t even here.”

“I know. Zarek had promised that you two would be in attendance. Same for Malik, but he had to stay in the kitchens to prepare for the wedding. Zarek said you two were on your way.”

“The stars had other plans.” Her features lack any enthusiasm. It’s as if I’ve sucked out her soul.

“Mama, I’m sorry. I tried my best to get you two here. It was important to me that my family and friends witness the wedding.”

She overlooks my apology. “So, you’re Queen of the New World now?”

“Yes.”

“Should I bow?”

“Mama, please—”

“I can’t wait to see the look on your brother’s face when you tell him he missed your big event. He would’ve
so
loved to be here.”

It takes everything in me not to cry. Why does she always make me feel bad? It’s not my fault they couldn’t make it.

“You’re right. I do need to be the one to tell him.”

She sarcastically nods.

Back in the room, Mattie stares out the window. “I see them in the distance,” he says. “The stars. I wonder if they’re the same ones that came after us.”

“I think they might be different, bud. Hey, why don’t you have a seat with me? I need to tell you something.”

He obeys, sliding off his chair and hopping onto the bed. “What is it, Andy?” His wide, brown eyes could hold the final innocence in this world…and I’m about to crush every last part.

“Well, you know what marriage is, right?” I ask.

He nods.

“Um, see, the King asked me to marry him. So we could be together forever.”

Mattie makes a rude vomiting noise, while sticking his finger down his throat. “Gross.”

I giggle. “Why is that gross?”

“’Cause you’re a girl!”

“You won’t be saying that when you grow old. You’ll actually want a girl, then.”

“Ewww!”

“Okay, so, after King Zarek asked me, I said yes. But he wanted the wedding right away so you and Mama couldn’t reach me in time to be there when it happened.”

“When what happened, Andy?”

“The wedding.”

He gasps. “You got married?”

“Yes, silly. Yesterday.”

He thinks about this for a moment, then his entire body slumps. “How come I couldn’t go?”

Mama stands against the far wall; her face confirming what she told me was true.

Wrapping my arm around his shoulders, I say, “I wish you could’ve been here. But we’ll still have fun while you’re here, right? We can have our own party. Would you like that? Just the three of us?”

He slightly nods and clutches his stomach. “I feel sick. Can I take a nap?” he asks, looking in Mama’s direction.

She smiles at him.

He tugs at the sheets and burrows underneath the covers.

“What about the gardens? Don’t you want to see them?” I ask.

His muffled voice replies, “No. I’m just really tired.”

I stride to where Mama stands. “Okay, so you were right. I upset him. But at least I was honest about it.”

“Andy, I don’t think we’ll be staying here very long. We have needs to attend to in Legora and I can’t allow our house to sit there while we gorge ourselves on desserts in crystal glasses.”

Blood drains from my face. “What?”

“This,”—she motions toward the general vicinity of the room—“isn’t for us. I’m upset that we weren’t able to attend your wedding, yes. But, as a mother, I should be congratulating you. You’ve made it further than the rest of us. We’ll be battling the elements and wondering whether the next town will accept us when we have to move again. You, on the other hand, will never have those worries on your shoulders.”

I feel a tear slip down my cheek, but it doesn’t fully register that I’m crying. “Mama, I told you—you and Mattie can stay here. For as long as you wish.”

She gently kisses my forehead. “My daughter, what would I do here? The same work I perform in Legora?”

I guess I never thought about her working. I envisioned her fooling around like I have for the past two weeks—playing games with Mattie and me in the gardens, or sampling new foods from the kitchens.

Never sewing clothes. Never washing dishes. Never scrubbing laundry.

 
“It’s what’s
normal
,” she continues
.
“We’ll stay until tomorrow, and then let you get back to your duties. I’m sure being Queen has many responsibilities.”

Responsibility.
There’s that word again. Funny thing is: I have yet to be responsible for anything.

45.

As promised, Mama and Mattie pack the next morning in time for their departure to Legora. Black Riders linger at the front gates, waiting to take my family back to the train station.

“I wish you’d reconsider,” I tell Mama.

“You have obligations now. Remember that. Remember to be strong,” she says, and then they mount the horses. Mattie’s still upset. He hasn’t spoken to me since last night. I don’t know when I’ll be able to visit Legora again, so I hope he forgives me.

Hooves kick up sand. Everyone bounces on their saddles.

Once again, I’m alone.

46.

Later the next morning, I decide to sit in the gardens. The sun is directly overhead, and the invisible dome can be seen at just the right angle, I’ve learned. It’s a pink tint, with distorted swirls.

“Thinking about me?”

I turn, startled. “I didn’t realize you’d be back so soon.”

“I told you we wouldn’t linger for longer than a day or two.” Zarek sits on the bench beside me, facing the opposite way. “You didn’t answer my question. I had hoped by now you would have forgotten our little tiff.”

“I’m still upset with you,” I say, not looking at him.

“How are your mother and brother?” he asks.

“Fine.”

“And they left so soon? I was hoping to eat a dinner or two with my new family.”

I don’t say anything. I don’t really want to speak to him right now. Why doesn’t he get that?

He stands. “Why don’t you come inside for a bit? You need to be ready for a family visit on my side.”

I actually stare at him now. “You said you didn’t have any family left.”

“I lied. Most do not know an heir exists. He is my brother, and he wants nothing to do with the throne. I am truly sorry. I should have told you.”

“Why does he stay away from the throne?”

Zarek shrugs. “That is the life he has chosen. I don’t argue with him.”

“And if something ever happened to you, then what? Would he claim what’s his?”

“I cannot answer that for sure,” he says. “I will leave it up to his heart.”

I stand up. “I want to meet him.”

“You will, my dear.” Zarek leans forward, kissing my forehead. “But we have other matters to attend to.”

“Like?” I ask. Zarek’s finger lightly strokes the side of my neck, sending mini shivers up my arms and back simultaneously. I close my eyes. Even though this feels good, it doesn’t feel
right
.

His lips are on mine. Supple. Tender. His tongue slides through my lips and past my teeth. It’s foreign to me. Completely different from kissing Malik.

As soon as he moans, I pull away. His eyes are still closed.

When they open, he asks, “What’s wrong?”

I shake my head. “I’m not ready for this yet. I’m sorry.”

He inhales a sharp breath, and contemplates what I’ve said. “Andrina, this is what couples do. If you’re so concerned—”