Under His Care (6 page)

“No, I do want to. I’m just…so confused. As usual.”

Nicole smiled gently. “There’s nothing wrong with being confused. Especially about love.”

“Love,” Kennedy said, wincing. “Is that what it is when your heart gets torn out of your chest?”

“I think so.” Nicole watched her, sipping from her cup slowly.

Finally, Kennedy began telling the story, about how Easton showed up at her apartment out of nowhere and asked her to return to work. And then she described how he’d come into her apartment and she’d thrown him out, yelling at him, and he’d walked away without looking back.

Kennedy realized her cup was shaking in her hand and she placed it on the saucer on her lap. “Part of me thinks I’m crazy for even considering being in a relationship with him after everything that’s happened. The other part of me thinks I’m crazy for sending him away.”

“I don’t think you’re crazy,” Nicole told her.

“You don’t?”

“Easton came over under false pretenses. He wasn’t there to ask you to come back to work, he was there because he wants to see you again.”

“That’s right,” Kennedy said, not having thought of it that way until now.

“And he should have been honest in admitting his feelings for you,” Nicole said, “because I’m quite sure he has strong feelings.”

“I don’t know,” Kennedy said. “I thought that too. But then, the other night it seemed all he wanted was sex, and when I asked for a little softness, he was angry and resentful. He claimed that I was trying to change the rules of the game or something like that.”

“Rules of the game?” Nicole laughed. “These men sure do love their little games, don’t they?”

“It seems so.” Kennedy looked down. “I just miss him.”

“It’s going to be okay, either way. You’ll get through this. You’re not alone.”

“I feel like I’m going to be alone forever.”

Nicole shook her head and leaned forward. “Listen to me, Kennedy. We’re going to make some changes with regards to your work situation.”

“What do you mean?”

“When Red comes home, we’ll discuss it more.”

Kennedy wanted to ask her sister what she meant, but she understood that Nicole didn’t want to get into it without Red being present. So they moved on to discussing Nicole’s life, and she told some funny stories about Red’s crazy mother and some of the things they’d gone through with her trying to sabotage their relationship.

It helped for Kennedy to hear that Red had problems just like everyone else, and that Nicole and Red had been forced to deal with all manner of silliness and drama because of outside influences.

“Somehow it seems like everything just comes so naturally and easily to you,” Kennedy admitted. “I mean I know that it must not be that way, but you’re always so graceful under pressure. I wish I could be like you.”

Nicole’s eyes sparkled with humor. “If only you knew me back when, Sis. If only you knew.”

***

Riley was still napping when Red returned home.

Nicole was preparing a late lunch and Kennedy was trying to help, with little success, since Nicole insisted on doing everything herself.

When Red entered the kitchen, he greeted Kennedy warmly, his eyes soft and kind, and then he turned to his wife with an expression of love and tenderness that nearly broke Kennedy’s heart.

“Hey, babe,” he said, taking her in his arms. “Feel like I’ve been away from you for a year.”

“I missed you too,” Nicole whispered, and then they kissed and embraced.

It was an intimate moment, and Kennedy was almost embarrassed at witnessing it. At the same time, the love her sister shared with this man was crushing in its embodiment of everything Kennedy didn’t have.

Just days ago, she’d thought that Easton might feel that way about her, but now Kennedy realized it was a cheap imitation of what Red and Nicole had with each other. She felt small and sad and pathetic.

Red, as if sensing her discomfort with this display of affection, withdrew, clearing his throat. “So, Kennedy, how are you?” he asked.

She shrugged, trying to smile. “As good as can be expected.”

Nicole handed Red a plate filled with greens and some cold, fresh chicken breast on top. “Here you go, honey.”

He smiled at her. “You’re the best.” Red carried his plate over to the counter and sat on a barstool while Nicole fixed up a plate for Kennedy.

“I’m not sure how much you know,” Kennedy said to him, “but Easton came to my apartment today and asked me to come back to work.”

Red nodded, as if this was expected, while drizzling a small amount of vinaigrette over his salad. “And I take it you declined the offer?”

“Yeah.” She shook her head. “I don’t know if I was wrong to do that. I hope you’re not offended.”

“Far from it,” Red told her. “You should do what’s right for you.”

“Thanks for saying that,” Kennedy told him, and she was grateful to him. After all, it was his business and she’d made a lot of trouble for him already in her short time working there.

Nicole carried two plates of salad over to the counter and set them down next to each other. One was for her and one was for Kennedy.

The three of them sat together and ate for a bit, with Nicole and Red making small talk about work and Riley.

Finally, Kennedy was starting to feel like a third wheel, as though she was intruding on their idyllic lives and making them uncomfortable with her presence.

“Red,” Nicole said, breaking a protracted silence. “Do you want to talk to Kennedy about that other thing now?”

Red turned to her, surprised for a moment, but then it seemed to dawn on him. “Oh. Right. I almost forgot.” He wiped his mouth with a napkin and looked at Kennedy. “Look, let’s be honest, Kennedy. Someone with your background was never meant for the role of an assistant.”

She nodded her head in agreement, but her pride was wounded. “I suppose that’s true. I wish I could’ve done better. I really did try my best.”

“I’m not saying you did a poor job,” he clarified.

Nicole looked at her. “It’s not criticism. We’re just saying that your talents were wasted in that position.”

“Yeah.” Kennedy sighed. “I guess this is the sign I was looking for to make a change. I mean, I knew eventually I’d have to go back to Boston and now it seems clear that I was never supposed to stay in New York.”

“Wait a minute,” Nicole said, leaning forward. “You want to leave New York?”

“Well isn’t that the point? I’m not cut out for this city. I’m not cut out for that job. I should be back at MIT crunching numbers. I took my shot, and now I have my answer.”

Red and Nicole exchanged glances.

“I think you misinterpreted what I was saying,” Red told her. “I want you to stay in New York and continue working for my company.”

Now Kennedy was well and truly stumped. What was he talking about? She blinked, confused, speechless.

“Go on,” Nicole said, patting Red’s arm. “Just explain the rest of it to her.”

Red loosened his tie. “I looked a bit into your history and the kind of work you did at MIT,” he said.

“You looked into my history?” Kennedy said, surprised and flattered, but also scared.

“I did.” Red grinned. “It’s pretty damn impressive stuff. There probably aren’t a thousand people in this entire country who could understand the things that you understand.”

“I don’t know about that.”

“The fact is, we need people like you in my company, Kennedy, but we don’t need them making coffee and sending faxes or running around checking on plane reservations and taking meeting minutes.” He pushed his plate away and folded his hands on the countertop. “What we need is a really good analyst who can take in tremendous amounts of information and find patterns.”

“What kinds of patterns?”

“My business is evolving,” Red told her, “and I need to be ahead of the curve. You know that maniac, Kane Wright? The one who helped us out the other day?”

“Yeah,” Kennedy said, not wanting to think too much about him.

“Well, guys like him are my competition. We might be friendly in our off hours, but when we’re at work, he’s my mortal enemy. And there are plenty of other guys and women like Kane, who are trying to take business away from me and gain market share for themselves. I need to think ten moves ahead of those people, and I think you could help me do that.”

Kennedy was taken aback, but also pleased that Red would even consider her for such a position. But then it occurred to her. “Are you doing this as a…I don’t know…a favor to Nicole?”

Nicole’s mouth dropped open. “No, Kennedy. Red would never give someone a job just because I asked him to do it.”

Red put a hand on Nicole’s shoulder. “It’s not completely beyond reason to wonder if Nicole asked me to do this,” he said, smiling. “And obviously you being family has a little to do with it. But Nicole’s right that I wouldn’t make an offer, and certainly not something of this magnitude and strategic importance to my company, unless I was personally convinced that you’d do an outstanding job.”

“I’m flattered,” Kennedy said. “But I’m not sure. So much has happened.”

“You’d be working directly for me,” Red told her, “so you wouldn’t have any interaction with Easton Rather.”

“Oh.” She was somehow disappointed in this part of it.

“You’d work from home, so no need to be at the office at any particular time. All you’d need is WiFi access and off you go.” Red cleared his throat. “And might I add, the pay jump is significant.”

Kennedy began tugging at her lower lip as she processed what he was saying. “I don’t know. I mean, it’s an amazing opportunity, but I’m afraid—“

“Don’t let fear rule your decision making,” Nicole said, her tone intense for the first time that day. “It’s one thing to be sad and a little confused. But you’re going to miss out on something amazing if you don’t take this chance. And for what? Because of a little bad luck in the romance department?”

“I just don’t want to fail again,” Kennedy admitted.

“You haven’t failed,” Nicole corrected her. “You just had a breakup.”

“I don’t want to mess up your lives anymore than I already have,” Kennedy said.

At that, Nicole and Red looked at one another and started laughing. Nicole grabbed Kennedy’s hand. “Honey, you haven’t messed up our lives.
You
feel a little messed up right now, and scared. But it’s okay. We’ve all been there and you’re going to figure it out.”

Kennedy laughed a little bit, and then she gave her sister a big hug. “I love you,” she said.

Nicole sighed. “I love you too.”

When they were done hugging, Red stood up. “So are you going to take the job or not?”

Kennedy looked him in the eye. “I’m going to do everything in my power to make you glad you took a chance on me,” she told him. And she meant it.

***

Over the following days, Kennedy was busy learning her new job. She worked mostly from home and then also met with Red occasionally for a meeting at a restaurant or went and spent time at his and Nicole’s home where she mixed work with spending time with her sister and Riley.

It was a strange time, because in so many ways, Kennedy had never been happier or more fulfilled.

But in other ways, it was the saddest she’d ever felt, all at once.

So many moments of joy were spoiled when she thought to herself how amazing it would’ve been to share it with Easton.

She’d be sitting on her laptop, working in a café, sipping a coffee while customers buzzed about, talked, came in and out. She’d be happy, grinning with pleasure at how cosmopolitan she felt being in New York City, working for Red Jameson on top-secret business intelligence analysis.

But then her smile would fade as she’d turn to the empty seat next to her and realize that she didn’t have Easton to talk to, didn’t have his smile to warm her, or his witty banter to keep her on her toes.

She missed him terribly.

At night, she had dreams that were filled with images of loss and remorse, where Easton would be on a train speeding away while she stood rooted to the platform, watching him leave.

Many mornings, she woke with tears still in her eyes, not even knowing for what reason she’d been crying.

When her first check was deposited in her bank account, Kennedy celebrated. Red had told her that it was a big pay upgrade, but the truth was even more than she could’ve imagined.

Kennedy was now earning close to three hundred thousand dollars a year, which, even in an incredibly expensive city like New York, was well beyond what she needed to be comfortable.

I’m rich
, Kennedy told herself, as she looked at her online banking balance and just stared and stared.
I’m rich and I don’t know if I deserve it.

But she was working hard, spending ten to twelve hours a day, seven days a week, engrossed in learning everything about Red’s business and his competitors. Red had told her that much of what he expected her to do was to actually figure out how she could add value to his business.