Uncovering Camila (Wildflowers Book 3) (7 page)

Chapter 17

“When was the last time you were here?” Shoshana throws Camila’s overnight bag into the large walk-in closet in the guest room.

“Summer after graduation I think,” she replies, looking around. It’s only been a few years, but a lot has changed since then. Life no longer looks or feels the same as it did then. The void of pure potential that she faced then has taken a different shape, one of responsibility and work. She even caught herself wondering the
what if
the other day.
What if I had deferred law school for a year
? It was a possibility, one her parents encouraged, but unlike her father easily convincing her to take a weekend at the beach, they weren’t able to convince her to take a year off and “figure” things out. To Camila, that meant putting off the rest of her life, and she was too motivated, too hungry for an adult life to wait. Naturally she won’t tell Shoshana, at least not at this very minute. She’s too tired to hear the inevitable “I told you so” from her or even the suggestion of taking a year after finishing law school. Camila can certainly entertain the vague idea but doesn’t want to hear it from anyone else.

“Well, you’ll see the house pretty much hasn’t changed, except my mom set up a meditation room and yoga studio so don’t be surprised if you wake up to chanting.”

She nods. “I’m used to noise, Shosh.”

“I was going to talk to you about that. I was reading about how the exposure to constant noise really affects the nervous system. Maybe you can convince your landlord to install double-glazed windows.”

Camila gives her a look. “And have him raise my rent in the process? I’ll take the noise.”

“You don’t always have to be so intractable.” She opens the door next to the closet. “Here’s the bathroom. My mom had it redone when she put in the meditation room. Isn’t it gorgeous?”

Camila can’t believe she’s entering a bathroom. It’s more like a suite twice the size of her studio that happens to contain a shower, double sinks, and a large oval tub. A beautiful cream chaise sits next to the expansive windows overlooking the beach.

“She totally went overboard, but I can’t blame her. The view is spectacular.”

“And then some,” Camila agrees.

“You’re glad you came, aren’t you?” Her cousin elbows her. “It’s on your face.”

Camila turns and gives her a warm smile. “Yeah, I didn’t realize how badly I needed to get out of the City. Thanks for dragging me.”

Shoshana wraps her arms around her. “My pleasure. No one ever realizes a need to get out until they’re finally do it. I swear the City can be like a prison.”

That last word reminds Camila of the thought she had a few weeks back. That her life was beginning to seem like a prison sentence. “I guess you broke me out,” she laughs softly.

Her cousin giggles. “I’m so happy you’re here. Now get some sleep. There’s a mask and some valerian if you need it. You need to be rested for tomorrow.”

Chapter 18

What her cousin failed to warn her about is that these plans would begin at the crack of dawn. Camila woke not only to chanting and OM’ing from her aunt’s yoga studio, but to the sound of singing Tibetan bowls.

“What the hell?” Camila rolls over, trying to reclaim a dream she’d been having in which she saw Eliseo on a beach. She was trying to convince him to stay with her, but he walked away, leaving Camila in tears. Before he left he said something to her and it was that moment that she’s trying desperately to recall as her cousin walks around her immense four-poster bed with the bowls.

“This will help balance your chakras and align all your bodies so you can have a balanced day,” she explains.

“Wouldn’t sleep have a similar effect?” Camila asks, her voice muffled by a pillow.

“Not at all. Although I can see by your smooth complexion that you had great sleep.” She sets the bowl down on the nightstand next to an amethyst geode Camila hadn’t noticed until now.

“I didn’t take you for an early-riser, Shosh.” Camila pulls herself to a seated position and rubs the sleep from her eyes.

“Here, drink this. It’s a non-caffeinated blend of green and white teas.” She holds up a cup. “I only wake up early when I’m by the water. The energy here on the beach is so intense, I love it. Makes me want to experience the day completely.”

“I’ve never seen this side of you. Usually I’m the first to wake up.”

“We’re all still growing and evolving. No one can be the same person they were a year ago.” She takes the cup from Camila and tugs on her arm. “God knows you’re not.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Camila asks, sounding more irritated than she intended. She’s never a morning person until she’s had at least one espresso.

Shoshana throws open the closet door and begins to rummage through her cousin’s bag. Tossing her a pair of leggings, she says, “You’re just at a stage where you’re figuring things out.”

“According to you, that’s all the time.”

“But in your case, it’s making you self-protective. You used to be more positive, dare I say hopeful, C.C. But you’re giving in to the grind, or it’s starting to get to you. I think you need to remember to stop taking it all so seriously.”

Camila opens her mouth, and Shoshana holds up a hand. “Please, don’t argue with me. Just accept my gift.”

“What gift is that?” She scowls.

“A day of peace. Then you’ll understand what I mean.”

Camila doesn’t need a day to understand what her cousin meant. After two hours of yoga, a massage and an hour of “non-essential” reading, she completely gets it.

As they lay by the pool, she asks, “How could you tell, Shosh?”

Her cousin removes her earbuds. “Tell what?”

“That I was becoming so buried.” That word came to Camila during the meditation that followed yoga. She still can’t shake the image that came to her. She was being swallowed up by quicksand, and no matter how hard she tried to reach for something to hold onto, she couldn’t.

Shoshana shrugs. “How could I not? Your schedule is insane. You prioritize work and school over the other areas of your life.”

“What other areas?” She retorts.

“My point exactly.” Her cousin motions to her. “Most of your friends from high school and college are still in the City. Until recently, you had an active social life that didn’t revolve around brunch with me. I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I’m starting to miss that stupid Cuban. At least he was a good outlet for you.”

“It’s strange how much you love and hate Eliseo,” Camila observes. She stops after she says his name. A shadow crosses her face.

“What? What’s wrong?”

Camila shakes her head. “Nothing. It’s just . . . .”

“Just what?” Shoshana lifts her sunglasses off her face. “What’s wrong, C.C.?”

Her cousin shakes her head again. “I just can’t. It hurts to think about him.”

“Why? What are you thinking about?” Shoshana gets up and sits on the edge of her cousin’s chaise.

“I dreamt about him last night.”

“I was so hoping you would have a dream.” Shoshana rubs her hands together. “That’s why I stuck that amethyst in there. What happened?”

Camila closes her eyes and tries to recall. “We were walking along the beach. Like the beaches here, but it wasn’t sunny. I wanted to stop, but he kept going, even when I called after him. After a while, he finally stopped so I ran up to him. And then he said . . . .” She stops speaking. She remembers what he says, but she can’t say it out loud.

“Please don’t stop there. It will help you if you say it out loud. Send it out to the Universe.” Shoshana flings her hands into the air.

Camila opens her eyes. “He said he could never love me the way I loved him.” She can feel tears well.

“Oh, honey. So you really were in love with him.” Shoshana leans forward to pull her cousin in for a hug. Camila decides it’s not worth holding back the tears. She prides herself on being strong, on not allowing anyone to come close enough to hurt her, but even when her guard was up, she allowed someone in, and in a few short months, he inflicted more pain than she realized was possible. It’s not the kind of
in
love that had her imagining a forever-after ending. Rather, it was the love of friends and lovers, the kind that made her feel she could trust him. It allowed for the sort of intimacy that compelled her to open up about her fears and anxieties about her future, as well as her secret desires. His leaving was a profound betrayal of this trust, and it didn’t occur to Camila until she saw him in her dreams that her cousin was right. A lot of her unhappiness can be traced to his leaving, and if she wants to feel the kind of peace she did this morning, to remember the person she was before the hurt, she has to find a way to forgive him and herself for loving him.

“I take it you’re not up for going out,” Shoshana says when Camila walks into the kitchen dressed in her pajamas.

She shakes her head. “I hope you don’t mind. I feel completely wiped, even after that nap.”

Her cousin smiles at her. “Good, it means you’re clearing stuff out. You’ve been holding onto that hurt too long.”

Camila perches on a stool at the end of the long, white marble island. “I honestly didn’t realize it until today.”

“And you weren’t going to if you kept going at the pace you were.” Shoshana rounds the corner to the wall of wine fridges. “It’s why I dragged you here. If you didn’t stop and deal with your emotions, they were going to back up on you.”

“The strange thing is that I don’t miss him. It’s not as if he was a big part of my life. On the surface everything is the same as when he was here.”

Shoshana returns and grabs a bottle opener out of a drawer. “It is, but when he left, you stopped experiencing love. You’re missing feeling love and getting some affection in return. In the end, it’s less about him and more about you.”

Camila rests her chin in her hands. “I think I’m done talking about me for a while. What are you doing?” She asks, watching her cousin pulls boxes and bags of junk food out of the cupboards. “Doesn’t that go against all this healthy stuff you practice?”

“I firmly believe sugar is good for the soul,” Shoshana replies with authority. “It’s my mom’s secret stash.” She holds up a bottle of white wine. “From Greece. Goes fabulously with sweets.”

“Where are your parents?”

“The usual. Dinner with the neighbors,” her cousin says casually.

Camila gets down from the stool and picks up a tray holding a box of chocolate covered cookies, frosted animal cookies, a bowl of raw cookie dough and salty pretzels. “Wine and a movie sound perfect. Nothing with relationship drama, okay?”

“I promise.”

Chapter 19

“What’s wrong with the white linen dress? You saw me pack it,” Camila says incredulously.

“I was humoring you,” Shoshana replies, waving a long, lace cutout dress in front of her cousin. “Put this on. My parents are waiting.”

“You did this on purpose so I’d have to wear it.” Camila slips the thin straps over her shoulder.

“I’m not denying anything,” Shoshana replies, zipping the low back before closing the button. “I knew this would look fabulous on you, and when else would you wear it?”

“Probably never,” Camila mumbles as she turns and catches a glimpse of herself in the large mirror at the far wall of the bedroom, placed there for some feng shui purpose she was told.

The dress is stunning. It’s the lightest, airiest fabric she’s ever worn. The beauty is in the simplicity of the design and cut which accentuate her slim waist and height. As much as she hates being made over, at least her cousin has taste.

“I know you like it, so no complaining. Remember, tonight is about having fun.”

If Camila’s father considered the Cohen’s Southampton beach house to be a symbol of vain excess, then she can only imagine what he’d make of the neighboring estate belonging to William and Poppy Baron. The media tycoon and his wife own over twice the acreage of the Cohen’s, and aside from the expansive main house, the property boasts full stables, a guest house, a pool house, four tennis courts, two bowling lanes in the game room, as well as a separate garage for William’s classic car collection. Camila smiles when she thinks of her father, pleased he had the integrity to choose his life with his wife and daughter over this life of privilege which belonged to him as much as it did his brother, Arthur. She glances at her uncle sitting in the front passenger seat of the car laughing at something Shoshana said. At least he’s never made her feel like an outsider.

She follows them up the stairs into the main house where the pristine Normandy accents are carried throughout. This isn’t Ralph Lauren beach house luxury either with blue and white linens and exposed white wood beams. It’s turn-of-the-century gilded luxury with twelve bedrooms, sixteen bathrooms, formal sitting and dining rooms, a library, an office, and two kitchens. Camila is accustomed to wealth through her father’s family, but this far exceeds anything she’s ever experienced before. She takes it in, fascinated by its stark contrast to her own studio apartment in Manhattan, less than a hundred miles away.

“Are the Barons here?” Camila whispers to Shoshana.

“Why are you whispering?” She whispers back.

The young women laugh out loud at the ridiculous question. Camila shrugs. “I don’t know.”

“My dad played golf with William this morning and said that Poppy was out of town, which is weird because she’s never missed a party, well, except for that one a few years back.”

“Who’s friends with them again? Your mom or your dad?”

Shoshana gives her a look. “William went to Groton with my dad. Your dad was two years ahead of them, remember?”

Camila nods absently. Her father doesn’t talk about his life much before meeting her mother. If it weren’t for her cousin, she’d hardly get a peek behind that iron wall he put up to separate that part of his past.

“It’s one of the reasons we’re neighbors here. William sold part of their estate to my parents.”

“Why would he do that?”

“People here do that, so they have a say in who their neighbors are. It’s perfectly incestuous.”

Camila shakes her head. “How do you have a sense of humor about any of it?”

Shoshana shrugs. “You have to see it for what it is, or it takes over your life.” She motions toward the house. “Wealth is insidious like that.”

Camila takes a cocktail off a passing tray, wanting to get off the money talk. She wouldn’t mind having a bit more to pay off her law school debt. Recalling her cousin’s words, she says, “It’s time to have some fun.”

Shoshana smiles and laces her arm with Camila’s. “Let’s go see who’s here.” She leads her through the house and to the back lawn, although to Camila, it’s more like a giant park, where a live band is playing and tables are set up throughout. Dusk spreads over the estate as she looks out onto the beach in the distance. The way the sky illuminates everything one would think the Baron’s paid someone to paint the sky the brilliant orange and reds to make a glowing backdrop for the party.

“Thanks for the dress,” Camila says, finishing her first drink. By the formal dresses surrounding her, she realizes how she would’ve stuck out if she’d worn the one she packed.

“It belongs on you. Keep it, please. I don’t have the boobs to fill it out like you anyway.” She looks behind her cousin and points. “Ooooh, look who just came in.”

“Where? Who?”

“Don’t be obvious.” Shoshana touches her shoulder. “The woman on the terrace in that tank dress with the ruffled skirt.” She lowers her voice and says, “She’s William’s mistress. My mom said she’s a former Miss-whatever.” She flings her hand up.

Camila casually turns and nods. “What is she, twenty-three?”

“As if. I’m a month older than her, if you can believe it.”

Her cousin gasps when she spots a figure behind William’s girlfriend.

“What? Age differences aren’t that important.”

“No, I don’t mean
that
.” Camila turns away quickly and begins to head toward the pool, away from the growing crowd.

“C.C., wait.” Shoshana rushes after her. “Slow down, I’m not wearing flats like you.”

“I’m sorry.” She stops when she reaches the pergola by the pool, grateful for the shadow it casts. Only a handful of people are lingering as the lights begin to give way to the darkening sky.

“It’s
him
.”

“Him who?”

“Why is
he
here?” she mutters to herself, wishing she could be back in the familiar comforts of her parents’ house, reading and sweating by the open window in her bedroom.

“Who’s here?” Shoshana asks impatiently. She flags down a passing waiter and takes two more cocktails.

Camila downs hers in two gulps then says, “Marshall.”

Rather than a cluck of sympathy or a pat on the shoulder as she would expect from her cousin, she receives a loud laugh and slap on the arm. “Well, well, wouldn’t you know it, dear cousin. I’d say the Universe has one hell of a sense of humor.”

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?”

Shoshana narrows her wide, dark eyes at her. “You declared you’re going to have fun, and the hottest and best lay you’ve had in a while walks into a party you happen to be attending.”

“It’s a coincidence,” Camila replies dismissively. “Or the Universe has the shittiest sense of humor.”

“Coincidence my ass. This, right here,” she motions toward the house, “Is your moment of truth. The Universe is daring you to have fun.” She gives her cousin a light shove in the direction of the party. “I’d say that it’s truth
and
dare time.” 

“Don’t I get to pick one?” Camila calls behind her.

Shoshana laughs, although it’s more pointed than her usual casual one. She’s clearly making a statement. “Either way, the result will be the same,” she calls back to her.