Uncle John’s Briefs

Quick Bits
of Fascinating Facts
and Amazing Trivia

By the
Bathroom Readers’
Institute

Bathroom Readers’
Press Ashland, Oregon

OUR “REGULAR”
READERS RAVE!

“I started reading your books after a colleague, ordinarily not much of a conversationalist, started to get smarter and smarter by the day. We couldn’t figure out what was going on until we caught him reading one of your books. I bought my first one that night.”

—Ernie

“God bless the
Bathroom Reader
. A lavatory without it is like a Pinto without a bumper: You could use it, but who’d want to?”

—Gregory

“Bathroom Readers
are perfect for any occasion. When we needed a housewarming gift, we got an
Uncle John’s
. When we needed Christmas presents, we gave
Uncle John’s
. We were invited to a birthday party for three men and needed gifts for all three. Not knowing what they liked or needed, we bought three
Bathroom Readers!
The response?… They can’t stop talking about it. Thank you.”

—John

“Just wanted to let you guys know that you are the BEST. I absolutely love your books—I’ve been reading them since I was ten, and I’m sure I’ve read all eight or nine in my collection fifteen times each, at least. And, thanks to you, I now have an interesting (albeit annoying) tidbit for every conversation! Many kudos.”

—Kristin

“I worship your books. They are the best. Congratulations on making the only book I’ve read in five years that I wasn’t forced to read. Rock on!”

—Vincent

“You’re the best thing to happen to the reading room since indoor plumbing and store-bought tissue (them cornhusks can get mighty rough, you know!) Keep up the good work and Go with the Flow!”

—Rick

UNCLE JOHN’S BRIEFS

Copyright © 2010 by the Bathroom Readers’ Press (a division of Portable Press). All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles or reviews. “Bathroom Reader” and “Bathroom Readers’ Institute” are registered trademarks of Baker & Taylor. All rights reserved.

Articles in this edition have been included from the following books:
Uncle John’s Ultimate Bathroom Reader
© 1996;
Uncle John’s Giant 10th Anniversary Bathroom Reader
© 1997;
Uncle John’s Great Big Bathroom Reader
© 1998;
Uncle John’s Absolutely Absorbing Bathroom Reader
© 1999;
Uncle John’s Legendary Lost Bathroom Reader
© 1999;
Uncle John’s All-Purpose Extra Strength Bathroom Reader
© 2000;
Uncle John’s Supremely Satisfying Bathroom Reader
© 2001;
Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader Plunges Into History
© 2001;
Uncle John’s Ahh-Inspiring Bathroom Reader
© 2002;
Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader Plunges Into the Universe
© 2002;
Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader for Kids Only
© 2002;
Uncle John’s Unstoppable Bathroom Reader
© 2003;
Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader Plunges Into Great Lives
© 2003;
Uncle John’s Colossal Collection of Quotable Quotes
© 2004;
Uncle John’s Slightly Irregular Bathroom Reader
© 2004;
Uncle John’s Fast-Acting Long-Lasting Bathroom Reader
© 2005;
Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader Tees Off on Golf
© 2005;
Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader Plunges Into Hollywood
© 2005;
Uncle John’s Curiously Compelling Bathroom Reader
© 2006;
Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader Wonderful World of Odd
© 2006;
Uncle John’s Tales to Inspire
© 2006;
Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader Quintessential Collection of Notable Quotables
© 2006;
Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader Cat Lover’s Companion
© 2006;
Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader Dog Lover’s Companion
© 2007;
Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader Plunges Into Music
© 2007;
Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader Plunges Into National Parks
© 2007;
Uncle John’s Triumphant 20th Anniversary Bathroom Reader
© 2007;
Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader Takes a Swing at Baseball
© 2008;
Uncle John’s Unsinkable Bathroom Reader
© 2008;
Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader Plunges Into Pennsylvania
© 2009;
Uncle John’s Certified Organic Bathroom Reader
© 2009.

For information, write:
The Bathroom Readers’ Institute,
P.O. Box 1117, Ashland, OR 97520

www.bathroomreader.com
• 888-488-4642

Cover design by Michael Brunsfeld, San Rafael, CA (
[email protected]
)

eISBN: 978-1-60710-649-4

E-book edition: June 2012

THANK YOU!

The Bathroom Readers’ Institute sincerely thanks the people whose advice and assistance made this book possible
.

Gordon Javna

Amy Miller

Jay Newman

Brian Boone

John Dollison

Thom Little

Michael Brunsfeld

Angela Kern

JoAnn Padgett

Melinda Allman

Sydney Stanley

Monica Maestas

Amy Ly

Lilian Nordland

Ginger Winters

Sarah Rosenberg

David Cully

Mustard Press

Scarab Media

John Javna

Karen Malchow

Publishers Group West

Raincoast Books

The Boxer Rebellion

Long John Silver

Amelia Bloomer

Will Shortz

Porter the Wonder Dog

Thomas Crapper

…
and the many writers, editors, and other contributors who have helped make Uncle John the bathroom fixture he is today
.

CONTENTS

Because the BRI understands your reading needs, we’ve divided the contents by length as well as subject.

Short
—a quick read

Medium
—2 to 3 pages, but still brief

HEROES & VILLAINS

Short

Odd Superheroes

Medium

Local Heroes

Vampires on Bikini Beach

Local Hero: Leroy Gorham

IT’S A BLUNDERFUL LIFE

Short

Not Exactly Prince Charming

Little Things Mean a Lot

I Apologize

Medium

Baseball’s Disabled (and Embarrassed) List

Unintended Consequences

Oops!

BATHROOM LORE

Short

Died on the John

Medium

Uncle John’s Stall of Fame

Ask Uncle John: In the Bathroom

Fart Facts

PLANES, TRAINS & AUTOMOBILES

Short

Just Plane Weird

A Dotty Idea

Medium

Wrong Way Corrigan

FADS & FLOPS

Short

Snap, Crackle…Flop!

The Chew-Chew Man

Medium

Toy Fads

TV OR NOT TV

Short

Star Trek
Wisdom

Game Show Goofs

Medium

Flintstone v. Jetson

Who Wants to Marry a Millionaire?

AMERICANA

Short

You Yell, We Shell!

Uniquely Presidential

The Joy of Sects: A Quiz

Medium

How to Read a Dollar Bill

Castle in the Desert

Tearing Down the White House

The Sad Tale of Centralia

POP SCIENCE