Authors: Dianne Stevens
Plus, neither he nor Jesse would allow her to drive because they both knew she was not capable of driving. Last, but not least, she knew the way Cody sounded when he was truly drunk and sick. She tended to him enough times to know he was faking it now, but she decided to play along with him. This, too, had to, be a part of Jesse’s plan.
“Okay, Cody, help me get up,” Beth said shakily because she really did feel lightheaded from the spiked punch. If fact, she felt a lot like she did when she had taken nausea medicine. The doctor had given her something so she could keep her food down and not feel nauseated, but it also wiped her out. She remembered all she wanted to do was sleep, just as she wanted to do now. But, as Cody lifted her slightly, she felt the blood and semen oozing between her legs.
“Cody, give me a minute then come back in and help me.”
“Alright, hurry though.” As soon as he stepped out of the tent Beth search for something to place between her thighs. She knew by the amount of blood still coming that simply cleaning up would not work. She needed something to work as a pad. Beth looked around the tent, trying to make out the different objects. She saw what looked like a roll of paper towels lying with some other supplies above her head. She grabbed the roll and hurriedly made a pad, placed it gently on her aching flesh, and tied her bathing suit bottom back on.
“Okay, Cody, you can come back in,” Beth called softly. He ducked through the opening and crept back to her side. “Cody, give me your shirt.” He did, without protest, and she put it on over her shirt. Beth reached up, took his hand, and let him pull her up. She wished whoever made the punch had mixed a pain reducer in it because she still ached and burned badly between her thighs and deep within.
When Cody opened the tent flap wide enough for them both to make it through, Beth thought to turn back and look at Clay. He lay on his side facing away from her, deep in sleep.
Beth told Cody just to take her home to the ranch. Cody was relieved because he wouldn’t have to start his shadowing until tomorrow. After he helped her in through the back door and into her room, he went through the house to talk to Jesse.
Cody knocked on the door and walked in. Jesse was in the shower so he sat on the bed to wait for him to finish.
“Hey, Jesse, you got company,” Cody called out through the door.
It was only a few minutes before Jesse came out with a towel wrapped around his waist.
“What are you doing here, Cody? Where is Beth? You are supposed to be watching her!”
“Calm down. She wanted to come home to her old room. She is taking a shower now.”
“So that’s who took my hot water. How is she doing? Is she okay?”
“Look, I don’t want to get into any of that. Beth is like my sister and there are just some things I’d rather not know about, if you know what I mean. This whole situation is a little embarrassin’ for me.” Cody’s face was turning red. “I promised I would watch her for you because I saw the desperation in your eyes. I don’t really know Clay well enough to decide if he is a good guy or bad, but I do know Beth has loved you far too long for me not to do whatever I can to help get things back on track the way they should be.”
“That’s fair enough, Cody, and I thank you. I don’t know how I can repay you for this.”
“Oh, I’m sure I can think of somethin’. I’ll see you in the mornin’ or rather afternoon. This has been one long night.”
“That ain’t no lie. Good night, Bud.”
After Cody left, Jesse leadenly collapsed on the bed, causing the frame to creak. He was so tired he could hardly think straight. He hoped he hadn’t hurt Beth too badly. He should have never allowed his temper to get the better of him. Not that he regretted what he did because he knew that, if the circumstances were the same, he would do it again. He only wished he hadn’t been so rough with her.
Beth was his woman and he would do whatever it took to keep it that way. He didn’t believe it hurt him as bad as when he saw the two of them at the pond as it did now. Knowing that she thought he was Clay, and she let him make love to her, was a hard blow to take. He knew he would rather take a physical beating than the beating he was taking emotionally. Jesse laughed a bitter chuckle, when he remembered he had always said he would marry nothing but “A Virgin,” like some prehistoric male, was bullshit. Marrying a virgin wasn’t his obsession, it was the fact that he knew he could never cope with Beth being with another man. Who’d ever thought the tables would turn so that he was the one waiting for the long-ago promise to be fulfilled? As tired as he was, he knew he wasn’t going to get much sleep tonight.
Beth slept like a baby. It was one o’clock when Susan lightly knocked on her door telling her she had company. Beth was still sore and uncomfortable from the sex and disoriented from the drink, but she managed to get dressed. When she walked in the hallway, Susan hugged her.
“Honey, I didn’t even know you were here. When Clay knocked on the door and asked for you, I told him you weren’t here. He asked me to make sure because he had just come from your apartment and you weren’t there. So, needless to say, I was a little surprised but happy to see you in your room.”
“I know, I kinda’ snuck in late last night. I might even decide to stay a while.”
“That would be wonderful, baby. I wish you and Cody would both move back home, but I’m not going to push. You’re almost 20 now and old enough to make your own decisions.”
“We’ll see, I guess I better go see what Clay wants. We had a little misunderstanding before he left here the last time, but we kinda’ made up last night.” Beth walked to the front door where Clay decided to wait for her. When she saw him, he had a look of anguish on his face. When she got closer, he grabbed both of her hands in his.
“Beth, are you alright?” Clay said with sincere concern. “Can we go outside to talk?”
“Yeah, sure, let me get my shoes.”
While Beth went back to her room to get her shoes, Cody was banging on Jesse’s outside door.
“Hey, Jesse, let me in!”
Cody was cut off from saying anything else because Jesse, in his boxers, barefoot, and shirtless, suddenly jerked the door open. Jesse was silent as he waited for Cody to continue to say why he was there.
“Clay is at the front door now waiting on Beth to get her shoes on to go outside. I don’t know if they’re going walking or getting into a vehicle.” Cody was talking to thin air because, after he got out the first sentence, Jesse ran and got his pants off the bed and jerked them on. Jesse passed Cody still standing at the door as he flew past him to get a view of the front door from the side of the house.
“Okay, Clay, I’m ready,” Beth said as Clay took her by the hand and led her outside to the front porch swing. When they sat down, Clay put his arm around Beth before he spoke.
“Beth, I am so sorry. I beg your forgiveness. I-I don’t even know what to say. I know you only wanted to cuddle last night and that was the only intention I planned. I don’t know what happened between you and Jesse, but I do know you were hurt. You have to believe me when I say I had no intention of taking advantage of your vulnerability.” Beth squeezed his hand that was lying on his lap. “Clay, I do believe you.”
“Oh God, Beth, you don’t know how relieved I am to know you don’t hate me. I mean, I just got your friendship back. I sure didn’t want to do anything to jeopardize it again. You mean too much to me. I think of you as my best friend. You’ve got to know I felt horrible when I woke up and found you gone and blood on your side of the pallet. Then, when I looked down at my own self and saw the blood on my, my um, lower stomach area, I knew I had screwed up big time. But, Beth, I honestly can’t remember a thing. I guess it was that potent drink my cousin gave us.”
Beth stopped hearing anything after Clay insinuated he found blood on his privates. Her world went black. She was so distraught she thought she was going to pass out. How could she have been wrong? Did the drink have a hallucinatory drug in it? She found herself in a robot state as she squeezed Clay on the hand again.
“I don’t blame you for anything. What happened last night was something I allowed to happen.” Then Beth stood up to go. She was too numb to think, but she knew Clay was sincere in what he was saying.
Clay stood up also and enfolded Beth in his arms. “Beth, can we continue from here? Will you start going out with me as my girlfriend?”
“Clay, right now I need time to think, but I appreciate the offer. It means a lot to me.”
“Okay, Beth, whatever you say, but I want you to know I’ll be here if you need me. Please call me. I want you but I won’t push. I’ll back off and give you the space you need.” Then he hugged her tight and kissed her on the lips before he walked away.
Beth stood where she was in a daze. It was a few minutes after Clay drove away that she came to herself enough to walk inside.
Jesse stood beside the house seeing everything. He couldn’t catch everything they were saying because they were talking too low but he caught an adequate amount of the conversation.
His head fell back against the side of the house as he felt tears sting the back of his eyes. Sweat beaded on his forehead and dripped down his bare chest. He was too exhausted last night to face the reality of what happened, but he couldn’t ignore it any longer because he just faced it in broad daylight.
His Beth had mentally allowed another man to make love to her. He knew it last night, but it was a powerful blow seeing them together again holding and kissing each other. He knew now that he was hoping Beth would beat on Clay as she did at the beach or that she, at least, would have regretted being with him once she came to her senses. But did she do that? No, she hugged and kissed the bastard.
Jesse made it back to his room and told Cody he’d be back in a little while. Then he got in his truck, drove to the closest liquor place and loaded up. When Jesse got back home, he still had the mindset to tell Cody to keep a watch on Beth.
Even though Beth made love to Clay in her mind, Jesse didn’t want to take any chances of her making love with him physically. Jesse knew, if that were to happen, it would be out of his control then because he would never be able to take it. She would be lost to him forever.
The following four weeks Jesse didn’t come out of his apartment. He kept both his doors locked—the one leading off from the breezeway and the one opening to the outside. The only light was a dim light from a lamp and the glow from the TV that was right beside his bed. He had the volume turned so low he could barely hear it. Even though his little bungalow was attached to the main house like an apartment, it was far enough away from the main body of the ranch house that no one would hear him moving around, although he hardly did any moving.
Jesse made Cody tell Jordon that he had taken a month off for a personal vacation. He knew Jordon would be mad because he didn’t give him any notice or tell him himself; but, at this moment, Jesse didn’t care. He was in no shape to do anything around the ranch anyway.
Jesse could have opened a veterinarian hospital by now, but he chose, for the time being, to use his knowledge and skills around the ranch. He and Jordon were both making a healthy living the way things were so he had no desire to change anything. This one time Jordon was just going to have to excuse his absence and take the animal problems into town.
He hoped everyone would think he had gone with Beaux somewhere. He told Cody to say, if anyone asked where he was, that he had mentioned going hunting with Beaux. It would be his luck for Beaux to pull up about now, but Beaux had said when he dropped him off that he would be gone for a while on a hunting expedition.
Jesse would only answer Cody’s phone calls. Cody would call let it ring once then call again.
As bad as he felt, he still wanted updates on Beth. Cody told him that he found out from Clay’s cousins that Clay left town to go back home for a while. Jesse hoped the man would stay home and never return.
Jesse found himself in a deep stupor. He drank a lot and ate little. Cody brought him food at night and begged Jesse to come out of this, but he just wasn’t ready. He told Cody everytime he pleaded that he would in a few more days.
When Jesse looked at himself in the mirror, he hardly recognized the man looking back. His beard had grown out for the first time in his life. He had lost weight and his eyes seemed to be permanently bloodshot. Everytime he was sober enough to remember the reason he was drinking, he would start drinking again so he would forget.
Beth went to her bedroom after Clay left that morning and sat on her bed. She was in a state of shock. Tears streamed down her face and she didn’t even know she was crying. Over and over in her mind were the words, “How could I have been wrong…” She sat there and stared into space for about an hour.
Then she slowly returned to rationalism. She shook her head as if to clear out plaguing thoughts. Then she went over everything that happened last night and everything Clay had said this morning. It didn’t take Beth long to know she was not wrong.
She couldn’t explain how Clay happened to have blood on him. Maybe someone came in after she left or maybe he wrapped up sometime during the night in the stained sheet. The reason no longer mattered. Beth was positive she had made love with Jesse. She couldn’t believe she ever doubted it.
She would never mistake Jesse’s scent or the way he felt. She knew most of his body better than he did. She had lived with him and dreamed of him for too many years. At first, when he came in the tent and started rubbing on her, she had been groggy, but she was awake before he took her and wide awake before he was finished. She believed a comatose person would have woken up over that painful experience. Beth remembered every single thing that happened.
Beth got out of bed, walked over to her dresser, and pulled out a folded tissue. She unfolded the tissue and looked at Jesse’s chest hair that she had pulled out last night. She smiled, refolded the tissue, and placed it back it the drawer.
Beth thought about how upset Clay was this morning. Beth really did like Clay and she hoped he would find someone good. He deserved to be happy also. Even with all his cocky airs, he still had a compassionate heart.