Unbreakable (Accidental Crush #3) (19 page)

Searing pain slices through my right leg.
Fuck
. I instantly know it’s bad. It’s like my soul knows.

“Todd!” I hear Ryan’s voice cut through all the other noise. Somehow, he ended up behind me. I don’t know where I am, but I know I can’t move.

“Don’t move him!” I hear Ryan again.

“Oh, my God,” I hear Gretchen saying over and over.

“Gretch, do you have your phone?” Ryan asks.

“Shit, man. I’m so sorry,” I hear Mark. “I thought it was a good idea to sit down. I was going too fast,” he’s saying to someone else, but I’m not sure who. It was Mark on the slope I almost ran into.

I hear Ryan’s voice again, closer now. “Todd?” he keeps repeating my name.

I open my eyes, not even realizing they were closed.

“Oh, thank God,” Ryan says quickly, mostly under his breath. “Are you okay?”

“No,” I try to say, but I’m having a hard time forming words. “It’s my leg.”

I see the look on his face as soon as realization sinks in, and then he quickly erases the panic for my sake and goes into automatic lifeguard mode.

“I called the ski desk for help,” Gretch says as she makes her way over to us through the snow. “They’re sending a rescue team up.”

“It’s marker seventeen,” I hear Blythe coming up, and then Brian is in my face.

“Todd? Todd, are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m great,” I say, though my voice sounds off. I don’t like the way it sounds, as if it’s verifying something is wrong.

“It’s his right leg,” Ryan says. From his tone, I know the look he just gave Brian.

“Shiiiit,” I hear Brian, but he’s farther away now.

I’m in so much pain I can’t move. I know it’s bad. I’m trying to put on a brave face, but I know what this means. I don’t need Ryan to try to protect me from reality. Broken leg equals broken future.

“Is everything okay?” I hear a voice I don’t recognize.

“Yeah, we called for help,” Gretchen answers, surprisingly in control. Maybe she’s more like Ryan than I ever realized.

“Why don’t you guys head down? We’ll stay here with him until help gets here,” Ryan says to the rest of our crew.

“I’m staying!” Brian barks back in a tone I recognize; there’s no use arguing with him.

“Okay, everyone is gone; it’s just us.”

I look up to see Ryan, Gretch, Brian, and Blythe all staring down at me.

“It’s going to be okay, Todd,” Blythe and Gretchen say over each other.

Regardless, I can see it all over Ryan and Brian’s faces; they know the truth.

Nothing is okay.

ASHLEY

Sid is on a date with Simon, so it’s just me and Shane tonight. Since Shane and Johnny are still “just friends” and we’re both feeling lonely, we decided to have a wallow-in-our-sorrows old school movie night. We rented every John Hughes movie we could think of and are camped out in my family room. Thankfully, we have a TV in the basement, so my dad can still watch college playoff games.

I can tell my dad misses Ryan, because he keeps coming up to give us the scores. I don’t think he’s figured out that Shane couldn’t care less. Each time my dad leaves the room, Shane gives me a look, making it clear he has no idea what my dad is talking about, but he’s nice enough to pretend to seem interested.

When the house phone rings, my dad shouts out to us from the kitchen, “I’ve got it.”

Then I hear him say Ryan’s name, and his tone changes, capturing my attention.

“How bad?” he asks. “I see ... Right... Okay ... I’ll tell her … Okay … Tonight? Which hospital?”

My heart drops into my stomach as I quickly sit up, startling Shane who’s obliviously engrossed in the movie.

“
What?
” he mouths to me, but I hold up my finger, trying to listen.

“I think Ryan is in the hospital,” I say in a low voice.

I can’t catch my breath. My heart is slamming in my chest as a million thoughts fly through my head.
Not again!

Shane instantly sits up straighter, and then we both strain to hear what’s happening in the kitchen. As we do, Shane’s hand finds mine on the couch, and he squeezes it. I’m so glad he’s here.

“Okay ... Surgery? … Yes, I have the address. It will probably take us two or three hours to get up there.”

Shane squeezes my hand even tighter, while I feel my throat constrict with a hard swallow.

“I need to go find out what happened, but I don’t want to,” I whisper as I push my tears back. “Maybe it’s nothing.” It doesn’t sound like nothing, though.

Shane’s grip tightens. “I’ll go with you,” he says, getting up and pulling me with him.

“Wait.” I pull him back. “Tell me about Johnny. What’s going on with him?” I ask, desperate to avoid walking into my kitchen.

Shane just looks at me with a you’re-not-fooling-anyone look. “You already know about Johnny. He kisses me, and I kiss him, and he doesn’t want anyone else to know. Complete one-eighty. Now, let’s go. You need to know what’s going on, and you need to find out sooner rather than later, so get up.”

All I can do is sigh and follow.

As we get closer to the kitchen, I feel like my heart is going to swallow up my lungs. I don’t say anything; I just stand in the kitchen doorway as my eyes meet my dad’s. He doesn’t say anything, either, but the look on his face says it all.

“What happened to Ryan?” I barely get the words out. I don’t want to hear the answer to that question, but I also know I need to hear it.

“It’s not Ryan.”

Relief floods me.

“It’s Todd.”

Wait, what?

“That was Ryan. He said Todd got into a skiing accident, and we should come up.”

I shut my eyes and feel the tears slip out and down my cheeks. I can’t say anything. I’m not supposed to care. The world goes into slow motion. Time stops. My heart stops. Everything stops.

“Ashley?” I hear Shane’s voice, feel his hand rubbing my back, but I can’t respond.

“How bad?” Shane asks. He’s no stranger to tragedy, and it shows. He’s calm and collected, while I am a mess, but I’m so grateful for him asking the question I couldn’t bring myself to ask. I know I’m not supposed to care in front of my dad, but I can’t hide it.

“They don’t know yet. They’re taking him to the hospital, but they think he might need surgery.”

“I need to be there, Dad,” spills out. No more games. I don’t care if we are supposed to be broken up; I need to be with him.

“I know,” is all my dad says.

Before I know it, we are in my dad’s blue Volvo station wagon, making the two and half hour drive up there. My mom decided to stay home, so it’s just my dad and me. This shouldn’t be awkward at all.

Shane made me promise to keep him updated. He’s already texted three times, and it’s only been ten minutes. I love him for trying to keep me sane. I texted Sid, but there is still no response from her. I don’t even know if she knows yet, so I’ve kept my texts very vague.

We drive in silence until my dad finally breaks it.

“Is that Todd’s?” My dad’s eyes land on the ring on my finger. I didn’t even realize I have been nervously running my thumb over it since we got in the car. I forgot to take it off, not that I even want to pretend that I don’t care about him at this point.

“It is,” I say, keeping my eyes on the road ahead of us.

“It’s nice,” my dad says softly.

Oh, my God. It must be so much worse than he told me. I just need to see him. I need to talk to him. I wish Ryan or Sid would answer my text messages.

“What do you know that you’re not telling me, Dad? How bad is it?”

He inhales deeply, and there is a long pause. Too long.

“I honestly don’t know, Ashley, but it’s his right leg. They think it’s broken, and he’s going to need surgery.”

I feel a grapefruit-sized lump in my throat. I have no idea how I’m even still breathing.

I look at the GPS, seeing it says there is one hour and forty-five minutes left in our trip.

Dad continues, “I also know you two are together and that you never really broke up. I know you love him, and he apparently loves you. Ryan made sure I told you, and he made me bring you up. He said Todd wanted to make sure you knew and that you were okay.”

He takes another deep breath. “He’s the one injured, and he’s more concerned about you. That tells me a lot, Ashley, aside from the fact that you deliberately disobeyed your mom and me. I know he really cares about you.

“Listen, I’ve known Todd almost his whole life, and I’ve always loved him like a son, just not as much as I love my daughter.” He squeezes my knee. “I just don’t want to lose my little girl, and I hated that I was losing you. I saw it happening, and I wanted to control it, make it stop, but I realize now that I can’t. Instead, I’m just pushing you away, and that isn’t going to make it stop; it’s only going to make me lose you faster. I hate that you’ve pulled away from your mom and me these last few months. I love you, kiddo. And ultimately, I want you to be happy. And if Todd makes you happy, then who am I to stop that?”

I don’t know what to say. For the first time, I can see my dad’s side of everything.

He gives me a quick glance and a smile.

“Thank you, Dad,” I say as my tears start to spill out again. Only, this time, they are tears of joy through the pain and fear. No more secrets, no more sneaking around, no more hiding. “He’s such a good person, Dad.”

“Yeah, yeah. Let’s not get too carried away. I mean, there are still rules, and there will be consequences when those rules are broken.”

“What about his parents? Do you think they’ll be okay with it?” I ask, almost afraid to hear the answer.

“I’m sure they’ll come around.” My dad squeezes my knee again before he brings his hand back to the steering wheel.

My phone buzzes with a message from Ryan.
Finally.

They just took him back for x-rays. How close are you?

1 ½ hours. How bad is it, Ry?

Pretty bad. It’s his right leg. Mr. & Mrs. H. just got here with Sid.

Almost at the same time, I feel my phone buzz again. It’s Sid.

Ryan says you’re coming. How long?

1 ½ hours.

That’s so long. I need you.

Hang in there. Keep me updated.

I will.

Then I text Ryan back.

LMK what you find out.

I will.

RYAN

I can’t believe this happened. I can’t believe we are back in a hospital again. I think we all quickly sobered up as soon as the accident happened. Luckily, the chaperones were so startled I don’t think any of them noticed alcohol was involved. It was close, though. Too close, and now Todd’s in the hospital.

Dammit! What were we thinking?

I can’t stop pacing, and I can’t bring myself to look Mr. and Mrs. H. in the eye. This is all our faults.

“Hey.” Brian falls in line next to me and joins my pacing. “He didn’t look good.”

“I know.”

“What do you think this means for his scholarship offers?”

“I don’t know, but it’s not good. I mean, it’s his kicking leg.”

Brian squeezes his eyes shut and shakes his head. “I know. This is all my fault. I’m the one who said we should go.”

“It’s everyone’s fault. We didn’t need to follow you, you know. We can say no to the great Brian Johnson.”

He looks at me and smiles sadly. “Thanks for that, but I’m taking this one.” Brian gestures with his chin in the direction of Todd’s parents. “His dad called the Penn scout to tell him what happened, and I think the coach just called his dad back. The Penn team doc is talking to the doctors here.”

“Shit.”

“Yeah, we just ruined everything. I mean, the three of us have offers from them. We were supposed to all be together. We’ve been saying that since we were kids, and it was actually coming true, and then bam! it’s all over, because of me.”

“Stop it. You don’t know that yet,” I hear Blythe’s southern drawl as she and Gretch come up to join us.

The waiting room is packed with our entire crew from the slopes, and a few other people are trickling in as word spreads. It’s pretty late, so most people won’t find out until the morning.

“His dad just said they are still taking x-rays, and we’ll know more after that, but the doctor said, with breaks like this, they’ll most likely need to prep him for surgery,” Blythe updates us since she was sitting close enough to eavesdrop.

When I look over to see Sidney sitting by herself, I realize I wouldn’t want Ash to be alone if the roles were reversed, so I walk over to sit by her.

“Hey, Sid.”

She looks up and quickly wipes at her eyes. It’s clear she’s been crying. I wrap my arm around her since she looks like she needs this right now.

“He’s going to be okay.”

She closes her eyes. “I hope you’re right.” Then she opens them, and her eyes lock with mine. “It’s just … everything always comes so easily for him. I never worry about him. Ever. I mean, everything always just falls right into place. It’s been like that his entire life. And I guess I never thought anything bad would happen, like he’s invincible. But he’s not, you know?”