Unbreak Me (16 page)

Her eyes are on my lips as she closes the space between us and trails her fingers over my bare chest. “Yeah? Is it something good?”

Bile rises in my throat as I remove her hand. “I don’t come to town to see you.”

She rolls her eyes. “Come on, I know you get a little randy in the mornings.” This time, both her hands are on me and she looks up at me through her lashes. “Let’s have a little fun.” She shimmies her body closer and presses her breasts against my chest. “I miss the way you fuck me.”

I clench my jaw and fist my hands at my sides. My brain wants nothing to do with this woman, but Mr. Balls For Brains down south has other ideas.

“Come on,” she whispers. “Remember how good it used to be.”

“Stop,” I snarl, stepping back. “I don’t remember, and neither do you. We were too goddamn wasted to remember shit. You’re with Chad now, remember?”
Chad.
I can barely speak the man’s name without spitting. I’ve come a long way in the last year, and I take responsibility for my actions. But I still hate that man’s guts.

She drops her hands and scowls. “Jesus, you’ve become such a buzzkill.”

I don’t respond. I don’t care enough to argue any more. “My lawyer sent you papers.”

She’s weaving her way toward the door. “I’m going to pretend he didn’t,” she says. “You’ll change your mind.”

“No, I won’t.” But she’s already out the door.

***

The sun blazes hot in the morning sky, and I slip my sunglasses on as I ring the doorbell of the brick monstrosity. The yard is well tended, the gardens lush. Hell, the inside better be in great shape too, since I pay for it all.

Juliana opens the door with a smile that drops from her face the moment she sets her bright brown eyes on me. She’s hardly the same woman who stumbled into my apartment this morning. “What are you doing here?”

“I’m here to see Zoe.”

Her face turns icy, and she throws a worried glance over her shoulder. Looking for her little guard dog of a boyfriend, no doubt. But I checked to make sure Chad’s car wasn’t here before I came up to the door. That little protective order he has against me makes it tricky to see my kid.

“You know you aren’t permitted—”

“Juliana—”

“No, Asher. Don’t. You’re the one who screwed up here.”

“I don’t—”

“Daddy?”

Zoe’s standing at the bottom of the staircase, tugging on a pigtail.

The jagged edge of something broken snags my breath from my lungs. I drop to a knee and open my arms.

She gives me a tentative smile before scurrying toward me with a shriek of delight. She throws herself into my arms and clings to me and that jagged edge rips through me and tears away the rest of my numbness.

“Just look at your beautiful new house,” I whisper. “I bet you haven’t even seen the whole thing, it’s so big!”

She giggles. “Have too!”

“I think it’s a castle.”

“Nuh-uh!” She puts her hands on her hips.

“Sure it is! A big house where a princess lives is a castle.”

“It’s not a castle, silly!”

“Zoe, why don’t you go play in your room?” Juliana says.

“Do you wanna see it, Daddy?” Zoe asks, those milk-chocolate eyes widening.

I kiss her forehead. “Not today, sweetie.”

“When do we get another special day?” my daughter asks, backing toward the stairs.

“Tomorrow after piano lessons. I’ll pick you up.”

She grins and hurries up the steps, taking half of my heart with her.

“Why do you do this?” Juliana demands.

I watch Zoe until she’s out of sight then turn to Juliana. “Do what, exactly?”

She frowns and softens the edge in her voice. “Show up here when you know it’s against the court order? Get your daughter excited about seeing you before it’s your visitation time?”

“Because she’s my daughter,” I growl. I take a step back. My fists clench at my sides and I feel the old anger rising up in me. “I have a right to see her.”

“You do. One week a month.”

I take another step back and shake my head. “She’s my daughter.”

“What if Chad had been here?” She lifts her palms. “Asher…”

But I don’t want to hear what she has to say, and I head to my car before I say something I’ll regret.

Chapter Fourteen

Maggie

“I’m gonna need another,” I sing as our waitress comes by our table.

Hanna and Lizzy exchange a look.

“What about you two?” the waitress asks.

“We’re fine,” Lizzy says, eyeing my nearly empty glass.

“What?” I ask, leaning forward on the table. “Are we having a good time tonight or not?”

“Just take it easy, okay?” Hanna says.

The Friday night crowd is an odd mix of townies and college kids who stayed in town for a job or summer classes. I’m not even sure which category my sisters and I fit into. Are we townies because we grew up here or did we start to get lumped in with the pretentious assholes when we started at Sinclair?

“I’m not spending my Friday night holding your hair while you barf into Brady’s toilet.”

I roll my eyes. “Lightweights.”

I talked my sisters into moving martini night to Brady’s, where we’re dancing instead of gossiping and drinking cheap margaritas instead of martinis. I almost canceled in favor of some vodka and solitude in my studio, but I thought better of it when I remembered how that ended last time.

I want to talk to them about Krystal and Will’s breakup. I want to show them the pictures of Grace that came in the mail this week. I want to ask if they know why Asher wasn’t pissed at me when he saw Will kissing me last week.

I want to talk to them like a normal girl talks to her sisters. Maybe, if I have one more drink, I can.

“Maggie,” Lizzy calls, waving a hand in front of my face. “Don’t leave us, girlie.”

Hanna’s frowning. “What’s on your mind, Mags?”

I blink at her and smile. “I need to know how to seduce a rock star.”

I’ve begun thirty-two text messages to him this week. Thirty-two times, I picked up my phone and pulled up his number. Thirty-two times I deleted the message before sending it.

I want to end whatever this is between us. Other than Will, Asher is the only one in New Hope who knows about my pregnancy. And then he saw me kiss Will and he didn’t get pissed. I’m terrified of how much he knows about me, how much he
sees
when he looks at me.

But no matter how many times I tell myself that his disappearance from my life is for the best, every thought circles back to him.

Hanna and Lizzy are staring at me with wide eyes.

“What? Can you blame me?”

They exchange a look. “We just thought…” Hanna begins.

“…Based on the way you two
look
at each other,” Lizzy says before Hanna chimes in with, “We assumed you already…”

“You know,” Lizzy finishes.

“He won’t,” I whine.

“Well, there’s been plenty of eye-fucking between you,” Lizzy says. “We can attest to that.”

I groan. “Lotta good that does me. But, hell, I probably screwed up my chance when I abandoned him at Krystal and Will’s housewarming. He hasn’t called or anything.”

Lizzy chokes on a sip of margarita, her eyes watering. “You left him there?”

“Why would you
leave
Asher Logan?” Hanna asks.

Lizzy scowls at me. “We are living vicariously through you right now. I cannot stress how important this is. Don’t screw it up for us by acting like that.”

“I panicked,” I admit.

“About
what
,
exactly?” Lizzy asks. “Because that man
wanted
you.”

I think of Asher’s penetrating gaze, his attempts to knock me off balance, the way he sees more than anyone else. I wave away the question. I don’t know if I could explain
sober,
let alone now while words elude my grasp.

“Wait,” Hanna says. “You said
he
hasn’t called
you
? Have you tried to contact him?”

I cross my arms. “I thought he might be pissed.”

“Yeah, and that’s why you start with an apology.” Lizzy snorts and extends her hand, palm up. “Give me your phone.”

“No,” I say, but Hanna is tossing something to Lizzy across the table. “Hey, give it back!”

“If you can’t be trusted to do this right, then we’ll do it for you.” Her fingers are already flying across my screen, and as hard as I try, I can’t scowl enough to stop her. “There,” she says, handing my phone back.

I snatch it from her hand and open my texts to see what she’s done.

I’m at Brady’s. Wanna fuck?

Hanna peeks over my shoulder and bursts into laughter as my jaw drops.

“I thought you said I need to
apologize
?”

“Bet you it works,” Lizzy says with a smirk.

“I could kill you,” I mutter.

She grins. “You could text him again and let him know your sister stole your phone or you could wait and see what he says. Either way, you’re contacting him
and
dealing with the sex question. It’s a win-win.”

The murderous rage I’m feeling must be showing on my face because she hops out of the booth. “I love this song! Han-Han, let’s dance!”

They scurry off to the space in front of the jukebox that we treat as our dance floor, and I’m left smiling despite myself.

The margaritas are catching up with me, and I can’t ignore it much longer, so I head to the restroom. Krystal made sure her little sisters knew early on about the assholes who took advantage of girls’ neglected drinks at parties and bars, so I’m sure to take mine with me.

I weave my way through bar patrons and back toward the dark hallway that holds the bathrooms.

“Hey, Lucy,” a deep voice calls.

I ignore it at first, but the hand on my ass has me grabbing a wrist and spinning around.

A chill spreads over my skin and sweet and sour mix rolls in my stomach. I release his wrist and step back. “What do you want, Kenneth?”

“Nothing,” he says, raking his eyes over me and making me feel exposed in my tank and jean skirt. “Not right now at least.”

I curl my lip—“Not ever.”—and turn toward the bathroom.

I take care of business, wash my hands, and then turn the water cold before splashing my face to cool it, to wash away the memories of being the fifteen-year-old girl the high school boys nicknamed “Lucy.” When I close my eyes, I can still hear them calling out from their lockers, can still feel their knowing eyes on me as I walked down the hall. I can still remember my dad learning about it and telling me,
“You get the reputation you earn.”

When the shaking in my hands settles, I pour my drink down the drain. With assholes like Kenny around, the last thing I need is to be blurry-eyed by booze. Or
more
blurry-eyed, as the case may be.

Guys like Kenny made my high school years hell, and I’ll be damned if I’m going to let them have that much control over me as an adult.

I exit the bathroom cautiously, worried Kenny might be waiting. But the hallway is empty and I have to laugh at myself when I see him leaning over the pool table. He’s not a threat. And if he tries to touch me again, I’ll just remind him what I do to the balls of men who grab my ass without permission.

It’s a speech I save for special occasions, but it involves scissors, origami, and a staple gun, and it works like a charm.

The twins are dancing, and I almost want to sneak out, too afraid my mood will erase those beautiful smiles from their faces. I make my way to the dance floor anyway, and force a smile as I sway to the beat.

My eyes are closed when I feel someone press against me from behind. After my interaction with Kenny, I’m jumpy and I stiffen immediately.

“It’s just me, gorgeous.”

My shoulders relax at the familiar sound of Asher’s deep voice, and I melt into him and the music, letting his arms wrap around my waist.

I turn in to face him and wrap my arms around his neck and his hands drop to my sides and tighten on my hips.

“Now isn’t
that
something,” Kenny calls from the pool table. He’s looking us over and shaking his head. “Fucking rock star millionaire and he’s sleeping with the easiest lay in town. You like ’em loose, Asher?”

Asher freezes and his body goes so stiff against me, I might as well be dancing with a piece of granite.

“Ignore him,” I whisper. “He’s nobody.”

Asher brushes my hair back and presses a kiss to my forehead. “Be right back.”

I wrap my fingers around his biceps and squeeze. “Please. Don’t. For me.”

His jaw is hard as he glares at Kenny across the bar.

“I gotta bounce,” Kenny announces, pulling on his coat.

I tighten my hold on Asher’s arm. He could escape me if he wanted. I know that. But I don’t want him talking to Kenny. I don’t want him giving Kenny the satisfaction of the fight he’s itching for.

Asher’s body is tense and he watches Kenny until he’s out the door. Only then does he turn back to me and pull me into his arms.

I peer up at him through my lashes. “I’m sorry about that.”

“It’s not your fault.” The words are ground out through clenched teeth, and his muscles are still tense under my fingers.

“My reputation comes from the choices I made. I’m responsible.”

“No one deserves to be treated like that.”

There’s nothing I can say, so we dance together in silence until the tick in his jaw lets up and his rigid muscles soften.

When the song changes to something slower, he says, “I was a little surprised to get your text. I hope you haven’t been looking for me. I’ve been out of town all week, just flew back in tonight.”

“I thought you might be angry with me,” I say softly.

“For abandoning me with your family, people I hardly know? What guy doesn’t love that?”

I laugh. “Okay. It was pretty shitty of me.”

“You’re forgiven,” he says, brushing my hair from my face.

“So, do you always come when summoned?” I grin. “Or are you finally going to sleep with me?”

His eyes drop to my mouth. “You only summon me when you’re drunk.”

“It was actually my sisters this time.” I lean my head on his shoulder. “Are you going to use that as an excuse again? Because I’m actually not drunk at all. Just…well lubricated.”