Two Tears in a Bucket (11 page)

“
Yeah, but she didn’t start it,” Melanie responded in defense of her friend. “And the bat wasn’t hers. One of them guys gave it to her.”

“
And what was the purpose of all that?” Beatrice asked. “Why she bring a million and one niggas over my house? Were they supposed to do something to Kevin?”

“
They weren’t supposed to even come. It was only me and Simone, and before we knew it, they were following us.”

“
Yeah, well, like I said. Simone can call me when she gets ready, or we can leave it alone. I just thought she was better than that, and I don’t appreciate a trillion guys coming to my house looking for my son.”

“
That’s not how it was, but okay, Ms. Kennard,” Melanie said. She knew Simone had heard more than enough. “I just wanted to see if you’ve heard from her.”

“
No, I haven’t, and I hope she’s okay. I really mean that.”

“
Well, if I talk to her, I’ll let her know.”

“
Okay, baby. You take care and tell Nic I said hello.”

“
Simone?” Melanie called after making sure Beatrice was gone. “Simone?” The line went dead.

I hope I’m not too far along to have an abortion,
Simone thought
.
Kevin had crossed the thin line that divided love and hate. She despised him and the last twelve months she’d wasted with him. The last thing she wanted was his child.

Tears drizzled down her face as she pulled the Yellow Pages from the coat closet. She blew the layer of dust from the cover and took the book into her room to search for an abortion clinic. Eager to learn the price, she called the first one she stumbled across.

“
Yes, I’m pregnant, and I need to know the cost for an abortion
,” Simone said.

“
I’m sorry. We’re closed. I don’t know what possessed me to even answer this phone. I guess it’s just second nature. We’re open tomorrow from…”

“
Please,” Simone begged, her voice barely above a whisper as she struggled to speak over her tears. “All I need is a price.”

“
Oh, honey. It’s going to be okay,” she cooed in response to Simone’s tears. “How far are you?”

“
I’m not sure. I’m guessing four months.”

“
Umm…you’re really pushing it. The further along you are, the more complications there are and the more expensive it is.”

“
But can it be done?”

“
Oh yeah, it can be done.”

“
How much do you think it would cost?”

“
Well, based on what you’ve told me, it could cost you up to eight hundred dollars.”

“
Okay. Thank you.”

“
Sweetheart, if you want, I can go ahead and schedule the appointment since I have you on the phone.”

“
No, I’ll call back.” Simone hung up the phone and jotted down the number.

I have to pass this test tomorrow. Then I can find a job and pay for an abortion.

● ● ●

Kevin lay in bed, listening to his mother’s muffled voice as she chatted on the phone with Melanie. When her mumbling stopped, he headed out to the living room.

“
So what she say?”

“
Nothing, really. She was wondering if I’d heard from Simone. She’s not calling anybody,” Beatrice shared.

Kevin sighed at the mess he’d made. “So what all did you tell her?”

“
I just explained who Rhonda was, which is what you should’ve done a long time ago. You know how you and Rhonda are. She pops up and you two pick up where you left off.”

“
That’s not what you said, is it?”

“
Yeah, boy! That’s the truth!”

“
That’s not the truth, Ma. I love Rhonda, but not enough to be in no relationship with her! I told her all about Simone.”

“
Well, you need to call and explain that to Simone, if that’s who you claim you really love. I just told Melanie that Rhonda was the love of your life.”

Damn
, Kevin screamed to himself.
What the fuck gon’ happen next?

Chapter Nine

Five Days Later

Kevin was devastated by everything that had happened. The mere thought that he’d lost Simone was crushing him. She was his everything, and being without her was pushing him over the edge. He loved Simone more than he thought was humanly possible, and now growing inside of her was a child made from such an intoxicating love. Kevin wanted to right his wrong, but how? Apologizing was new to him. Rhonda had taught him that all was fair in love and war. However, this time, things were different. He wanted and needed to make amends. He contemplated going to get some fatherly advice from Mr. Johnson, but after everything that had happened, Kevin knew there was no way Simone would forgive him.

Seated on a chair in a corner of Felicia’s house, Kevin dangled a cocaine-laced joint between his fingers, preparing to break the number-one rule of hustling. The streets had taught him not to dabble in his supply. He’d seen firsthand what the product would do, as a few of his friends, like James, had fallen prey to the drugs. Kevin’s world had crumbled around him, though, and he needed an escape. A doctor couldn’t prescribe a better remedy than the one he carried in his pockets.

Ready to mimic the habits of his clients, Kevin fired up the joint. Taking a long drag, he gave the joint permission to take him far away from his troubles. He wasn’t new to the drug. He’d gotten high a time or two in the past, but since his breakup with Simone a few days ago, he’d become his number-one client, smoking every day.

Oh yeah,
Kevin thought, as his problems began to fade into the puffy white clouds of smoke he blew into the room.

The cries of the squeaking bed echoed throughout the apartment as Felicia worked one of her clients from the bedroom in the back. Kevin heard her client scream, “Ah, shit.” He chuckled to himself.

Taking one last puff from his joint, he stumped the butt out in the ashtray. The squeaks stopped. Minutes later, Felicia’s client strolled from the room, adjusting his belt. Kevin didn’t recognize the guy, which wasn’t surprising. Men came from hoods far and near to sample Felicia.

“
Man, that bitch might be ugly as hell, but she worth every fuckin’ penny. You gon’ get your money’s worth,” he said to Kevin as he headed out the front door.

A hint of light from the streetlamp outside peeked through the dusty blinds. As the apartment door slammed, Felicia strolled into the room, shoveling her hard-earned money inside her bra.

“
You know,” she said while walking over to Kevin, seductively swaying her oversized hips, “you would never have to pay me. I’d do your fine ass for free.”

Kevin stood from the chair.

“
C’mon,” Felicia said. “Just let me suck that muthafucka.”

“
Go ’head with that shit, girl. Go suck James.” Kevin stood face-to-face with Felicia. He grabbed her hands as she reached for his belt. “Go ’head, Felicia.”

“
Naw,” she whispered. She tilted her head to the side, staring seriously into Kevin’s hazel eyes. “Come on, Kevin. Shit, James knows. This is my hustle. This is what I do.”

Felicia wiggled her hands from Kevin’s grip with little effort and stroked the bulge in his pants.

“
I feel him gettin’ hard, too.”

Slowly, she undid Kevin’s pants and unzipped his zipper. “Just let me taste him,” she whispered.

She shivered as she eased her hands inside his pants. With her fingers wrapped around his hardness, she freed him from his boxers.

“
Damn,” she expressed in awe more so to herself. “I didn’t know you were packin’ like this.”

With Kevin’s erection in the palm of her hands, Felicia lowered herself to the floor, stroking him nice and slow as his body swayed from the influence of the narcotic. Teasing the tip of his erection with her tongue, she licked away the excitement oozing from him.

“
Mmm,” she moaned. She kissed every inch of his shaft before welcoming him inside her warm, juicy jaws. “Mm
m, mmm, mmm,” she continued to moan, working her magic as she deep-throated him.

Kevin’s eyes rolled to the back of his head. It wouldn’t take him any time to coat her tonsils. He grabbed the back of Felicia’s head and met her bobs with deep-planted thrusts. She gagged once, but kept with his rhythm.

“
Ah, Simone, baby,” Kevin moaned. His high had complete control over him. Mission accomplished. “I told you, you never had to do this shit, baby, but damn… Hmm…”

Felicia released him from her mouth and frowned. “That shit got you straight lunchin’,” she said while stroking him with her hand. “I told you I want to.”

Kevin’s eyes shot open and fell on Felicia. He staggered backward, confused. Where was Simone?

“
Hold up, Kevin. What you doing?” Felicia crawled forward, attempting to regain her position. Kevin shot her a threatening look and shoved his saliva-coated hardness back inside his pants.

“
What you doing?” Felicia stood. “Let me finish.”

What the fuck was I doing?
Kevin thought.

Reaching inside his pants pocket, he pulled out another cocaine-laced joint and left the apartment. He stood in the hallway, fired up the joint, and puffed away. High was where he wanted to be, and the episode with Felicia had tainted his original groove. The apartment door opened. Felicia leaned against the doorframe.

“
That’s a’ight.” She winked at Kevin. “I’ma get it one day. I promise you that.”

High as hell, Kevin staggered out to the strip. Fat Ed, James, and Tuffy were outside, talking shit as usual.

“
Damn, man!” Fat Ed hollered. “You look high as a muthafucka!”

“
That’s a’ight,” Kevin mumbled at a snail’s pace. “I feel good, though.”

“
Well, since you feeling all good, let’s roll up to the club later. What’s up, y’all?” Fat Ed turned to James and Tuffy. “C’mon, Tuffy, you ain’t never been out wit’ us. James, go wash your dirty ass, man, so we can roll.”

“
Man, I remember a time when we couldn’t pay your fat ass to set foot in a club,” James retaliated. “Now that you got some flashy-ass wheels and them thick-ass chains, you always ready to fly up to the club. The chicks don’t want your fat ass, for real.”

“
Shut up, nigga. I bet five hundred dollars that your dumb ass can’t even spell club,” Fat Ed said, knowing James hadn’t gone past the fourth grade. “What’s up, Tuffy?” Fat Ed asked, ignoring James. “You trying to roll or what?”

“
Man, I’d love to hang out wit’ y’all, but my girl’s on her way over here. She’d have a heart attack if she knew I was in the club chasing ass.”

“
I ain’t fooling wit’ y’all, either. I got some business to take care of,” James said.

“
I hope it’s with soap and a toothbrush,” Fat Ed replied.

“
Fuck you, man. You ain’t the only muthafucka tryna get that paper.”

Fat Ed turned his attention to Kevin. “What’s up? You tryna roll after you sleep some of that shit off?”

“
Shit, man, I don’t need to sleep. Just let me run home and shower, and I’ll be good.”

● ● ●

All night long, Kevin chased his high with shots of cognac, one behind the other. He danced, flirted, and filled girls’ heads with bullshit. His pockets overflowed with phone numbers from girls he wouldn’t even remember in the morning.

Close to four a.m., Kevin stumbled into his mother’s apartment. He kicked off his shoes and tossed his smoke-filled clothes in a pile on the floor. A scrap of paper fell from his pocket. He didn’t have to pick it up to know what it was.

“
Man, to hell with all y’all gold-diggin’ tramps,” Kevin said. He didn’t want any of the girls from the club. He wanted his Simone.

Shit, I’ma call her,
Kevin thought. He staggered into the kitchen and snatched the phone from the wall. He dialed the number. After a few rings, a sluggish male voice answered.

“
Hello.”

Kevin froze. His eyes darted to the time on the microwave. It was a little after four.

“
Hello?” the voice repeated.

Kevin hung up. Waiting a few more minutes, he called again, hoping this time Simone would answer. However, the male voice answered again.

Shit,
Kevin thought, riddled with disappointment. “I love you, baby,” he mumbled as he hung up the phone.

Chapter Ten

“
Kevin! Kevin!” Beatrice yelled. She barged into the room, turning on the light. “Get this got damn phone!”

“
Ma, what?” Kevin sprang up in bed, rubbing his eyes as he adjusted to the bright light. “What’s wrong?”

“
Felicia been ringing this got damn phone off the hook! Tell her don’t call my house at five o’clock in the morning no more! Here!” Beatrice threw the cordless phone on Kevin’s bed.

Kevin picked up the phone and fell back on his pillow.

“
What the fuck is wrong wit’ you? Why you callin’ here?” he growled.

“
Kevin! Oh my God,” Felicia screamed. “That Jamaican Toby is looking for James! He’s been up here banging on my door with a shotgun, saying he gon’ kill all us, and James not even here!” Felicia’s hysterical cries agitated Kevin’s throbbing head.