Twist of Fate (11 page)

Chapter 15

Lilly

A week has passed since the ball, and to my surprise, I’ve been hearing more and more from Silas. I thought for sure after Declan’s little slip up, if you even want to call it that, he wouldn’t want to talk to me anymore.

Our texts have turned into phone calls, and I definitely prefer hearing the sound of his voice. I sent him a text the night of the ball and apologized for what happened. He immediately called me back instead of texting me. I was a little nervous when I answered, wondering if that was going to be the end of Silas. Selfish I know, but I like having him back in my life. He told me about his conversation with Kristin, and to say I was shocked at the time was an understatement. I was a little taken aback that he actually told her no one has measured up to me. When I asked him what made him tell her, he said that he was simply telling her the truth. Needless to say, he hasn’t heard from her since.

After talking with my family, Megan and Declan, I realize that Silas needs to be told about Ezra. As nervous as I am about it, I know it’s the right decision and it needs to be done sooner rather than later. Silas is a good man and will only be a positive influence on his life. I never thought I would be able to tell Ezra about his father until he was old enough to understand. Now, knowing a little more about Silas, I know he will be a great role model for our son. Our son … that has a nice ring to it.

I took off work today so I can spend it with Ezra and prepare him to meet Silas. I probably should have talked to Silas about this first, but after finally deciding I was going to go through with it, I felt like Ezra should know first. I’m both excited and nervous about this. It is a huge step into changing our futures. I’m taking Ezra to the park and a couple of his other favorite places.

“Ezra, honey, are you ready to go?” I yell out in the house. He comes running around the corner, sitting down so I can put his shoes on.

“Ready to go bye bye, Mommy?”

“Yeah, buddy, after we get your shoes on.” Tying his shoe, I double loop the laces since he’s always untying them.

“Where do you want to go first?” Ezra holds his finger up to his lips like he is deep in thought, causing me to laugh. “You’re silly little man.” Placing my hands on the sides of his face, I give him a kiss on his forehead.

Ezra giggles, “To the park.”

We drive to the park and I watch Ezra play with the other kids on the jungle gym. He is so fearless that I get nervous watching him sometimes. He is always trying to play with the older kids and do the things they do. I’m sure I look like the overbearing mom who hovers over their kid and that’s okay with me. An hour later, Ezra tells me he wants to go jump on the bouncy houses. Since it’s across town I figure this will be a good time to bring up his father. I’m gripping the steering wheel so tight, my knuckles are turning white. Taking a deep breath in and releasing it, I broach the terrifying subject.

“So Ezra, I know Mommy has never brought it up before, but do you have any questions about your daddy? Maybe why some of your friends’ daddies are living with them and yours doesn’t?” Pulling my bottom lip into my mouth nervously, I wait for him to answer. I glance at him in the rearview mirror.

“Am I going to get a daddy?” He has a smile that stretches from ear-to-ear, and I know I’m doing the right thing.

“Well, yes, but you already have a daddy. See, Mommy lost him for a while,” I begin to tell him.

“Did you find him, Mommy? Did you find my daddy? You’re really good at finding things I lose.”

I let out a little laugh, “Yes, Ezra, I found your daddy. Would you like to meet him soon?”

“Okay,” he’s playing with his cars and doesn’t ask any more questions. Oh, to be that age again where the biggest worry you have is which car you want to take to bed with you.

We arrive at The Bounce House and I see Megan waiting for us outside. When we talked about me telling Ezra about his father, she wanted to be there for support. Ezra spots Megan and runs up giving her a hug.

“Megan, Megan! Mommy found Daddy!” He’s so excited, he takes her hand and pulls her into the entrance of The Bounce House.

“She did? That’s great news, Ezra.” Megan winks at me as he is whisking her through the door.

“Come on, you two, let’s get our bracelets so we can start bouncing,”

Every time we come here, Ezra somehow unleashes what seems like a month’s worth of built-up energy. I can usually last about an hour before I’m too exhausted to keep going. Megan on the other hand, that girl has more energy than the Energizer Bunny. I give them ten minutes to roam before they have to be back to eat. It’s nearly impossible sometimes to get Ezra out of those things, so I always make him eat first. They say okay and wave me off, leaving me to order our food. I’m standing at the counter, drumming my fingers against the top, when I hear my name called from behind me.

“Lilly?”

I turn around to see Silas standing there with two small children. “Silas, what are you doing here?” I look at both kids holding his hands and get a sinking feeling in my gut. Obviously he is going to be here for a while, and it’s only a matter of time before he catches a glimpse of our son. I planned on telling Silas about Ezra, but I never thought it would be today, here of all places. I had it all planned out so I could mentally prepare myself for the conversation we would have. That familiar feeling of my chest tightening starts up, and I know a panic attack is about to come on. I always carry my medication with me, so I immediately start digging through my purse so I can find it and take it. The last thing I need is for Silas to see my freak out. The man places my pizza on the counter and I turn to grab it, only Silas picks it up before I can. I pop the pill and wash it down with my soda.

“I got it. Where are you sitting?”

I nod my head in the direction of our table and nervously lead the way on shaky legs. I don’t know why, but I count to ten in my head to try and calm myself. I remember reading it in a magazine, and since I’m well past ten, I make a mental note never to read that one again. “So, what brings you here?” I ask, repeating my unanswered question.

“I’m spending the day with these two troublemakers,” he says, nudging the girl who appears to be older than the little boy that is in his arm.

“Hey! We’re not trouble, Uncle Silas,” the girl says, giggling.

“You’re right. I’m sorry, Ava.”

“It’s okay. Can we go jump now?” Holding on to her brother’s hand, swinging their arms back and forth, she waits for permission to take off.

“First, say hello to my friend, Lilly. Lilly, this is Ava and Owen.” They both say hello and make a mad dash for the inflatable houses.

“So, what are you doing here?” He sinks into the booth, lifting his leg on it, getting comfortable. Well, one of us might as well feel comfortable, and it’s definitely not going to be me.

Well it’s now or never, time to face my fears. “I’m here with my son.” His eyebrows immediately rise up and I can see the surprise in his face.

“Oh, wow. I didn’t even know you had a son. Out of all the times we talked, you never brought him up.” His leg falls to the floor as he straightens his posture. If I didn’t have his attention before, I sure do now. I can’t stop my leg from bouncing up and down, and my palms are sweating, so I wipe them on my jeans. “Wait, am I interrupting a family day? Are you here with his father?”

Wringing my fingers together, I mumble, “You could say that.”

Leaning his body across the table, he places his hand over mine, stopping me from wringing my fingers together. “I didn’t catch that.”

“Yeah, well it’s actually something I wanted to talk to you about. I was going to call you during the week and see if we could get together.” Before I can continue, I see Megan chasing after Ezra and they both are laughing. Megan is unaware of who is sitting at our table and I know Silas and Ezra’s lives are about to collide without any warning on my end. It isn’t until they reach the table that Megan notices who is sitting there with me. Her eyes widen and a small gasp leaves her mouth. The look on her face pretty much sums up how I’m feeling at the moment ... like I want to throw up.

Ezra wraps his arms around me, flashing a huge smile from all the fun he’s having, and tells me he missed me and is hungry. Silas is smiling until he see’s my son,
our son
, turn around in the booth to sit. There is no mistaking the fact that Silas is his father because they are identical. If the eyes weren’t a sure tell, they have the same exact nose along with a great smile they both were showcasing not even moments ago. I see the color drain from Silas’s face as the realization that he has a son sets in.

“Mommy, who’s this?”

Suddenly feeling a little parched, I clear my throat and take a sip of my drink. Before I can answer Silas holds his hand out, “Hey, buddy, my name is Silas. It’s very nice to meet you.” Although he is smiling at our son, his cold stare is directed at me.

“Hey, Ezra, why don’t we eat at this table over here and let Mommy and her friend talk for a minute.” Megan is holding her hand out for Ezra to take.

“It’s Megan, right?” Silas’s tone is sharp and his face is red, with his jaw clenched.

“Yeah.”

“I’m here with my niece and nephew. Would you mind watching them so I can talk to Lilly outside
privately,
please?”

“Sure, no problem.” Silas gets up to go find Owen and Ava, returning with them in no time. He introduces them to Megan and Ezra and gets up and takes off for the exit, not bothering to wait for me.

“What is he doing here?”

“Well Megan, I would think that is obvious,” I say, pointing to the two extra kids at our table.

“Right, well, good luck. It will be okay.” She has a half smile, trying to reassure me, but it doesn’t work.

I quickly make my way to the door and am met with a fuming Silas. He is pacing back and forth on the sidewalk with his hands tugging at his hair. His chest is rising and falling as his breathing quickens. I can’t even imagine what is running through his mind right now, but I’m pretty sure it isn’t good. My mind immediately goes to all the worst possibilities: is he going to hate me forever, is he going to resent his son? And then, the worst hits me like a sack of bricks. I suck in a huge breath. Oh, my God … is he going to try and take him away from me? Dampness fills my eyes at the thought of losing my son, and unable to hold in the hot tears prickling my eyes, one falls down my cheek. I wipe it away with my hand and tell myself I can cry later. I need to fix this because I can’t, I won’t lose my son. I clear my throat to get his attention and he immediately stops pacing and his head snaps in my direction.

“I’m pretty sure the answer is obvious since he looks just like me, but just in case I’m wrong, I’m going to ask anyway. Is he mine?”

“Yes.”

Chapter 16

Silas

“I fucking knew it,” I yell at Lilly. She flinches slightly at my words, but right now I don’t care. I’m so livid I could hit something. Never in my life have I ever resorted to violence, and now I want to shove my fist through a fucking brick wall.

“I was going to tell you--” she starts, but I cut her off.

“When? When were you going to tell me we have a son together?” Boring my eyes into hers, she needs to know that she isn’t going to get off easy with this one. She takes a step back from me, which pisses me the hell off. I may be seeing red, but I would never lay a hand on a woman.

“Are you done?” she screams, throwing her hands on her hips.

“Really? You’re really going to yell at me right now? I’m not the one who kept a child from you, and you have the audacity to ask me if I’m done? Well the answer to your question is no, I AM NOT DONE!” Striding toward her, I close the distance between us. Her body stiffens with each step I take.

“Let’s rewind things back a little, Silas, shall we? I had a one-night-stand with a
soldier
whom I knew nothing about. I didn’t have a last name or a phone number. Remember the whole ‘no strings attached’ agreement?” Her piercing eyes piss me off. I really can’t believe she is getting loud with me.

“I would say this is a pretty damn big string, don’t you think?” Throwing my hands in the air, I shake my head at how unbelievable all this is.

“Will you shut up and let me finish?! God, men can be so fucking annoying.” She walks away and sits on the bench that’s outside the building.

I stand in front of her and notice her hands are shaking. “I’m all ears,” I state while rolling my eyes. Sure, rolling my eyes may be childish, but I deserve answers and they aren’t coming as fast as I would like and her attitude is only pissing me off more.

“That’s not all you are right now. Anyway, as I was saying, we parted ways never to see each other again. When I found out I was pregnant, you were the last thing on my mind. I didn’t have your phone number, hell, I didn’t even know your last name. How was I supposed to find you? I had no idea where you were traveling to or if you were even still alive. I tried to look you up and you wouldn’t believe how many men named Silas there are in the world. So don’t come at me with your ‘
how dare you’
bullshit. I did the best I could with the hand I was dealt. If anything, you should be thanking me for raising
your
son and doing a damn good job with it.” She stands up, so I block her path, not allowing her to go back inside; this conversation is far from over. But before I can continue, things go from bad to worse.

“Your kid?” Kristin says from behind me. Shit. In the midst of all that’s happened, I forgot Kristin was meeting me here to see the kids. Today is the first day I’ve seen her since the ball and was excited to finally have her come around again. Letting out a frustrated growl, I turn to face a very pissed off Kristin. Her lips are tight in a firm line and her arms are crossed over her chest.

“Kristin--” I take a step toward her and she puts her hands out, stopping me in my tracks.