Twilight Girl (3 page)

Muscles tightened under the red shirt, a spasm of remembering for no special reason the agony of undressing in the gym locker with perspired, perfumed bodies crowding her against the steel cabinets, the gagging, hot-faced bewilderment of her own nakedness and theirs. "It's sharp. I mean, it goes together."

A horn sounded and the girl spoke again. Under the heavy black lashes, the pastel eyes looked vaguely amused. "Listen, I gotta go. What'll it be tonight—butch?"

Lon handed back the menu. "Large chocolate Coke."

Violet didn't move. "You heard me."

"I said, large chocolate Coke."

"Oh, Christ, come t' the party. You slow on the uptake, butch?"

"My name's Lon Harris."

"Lon. Hey, that's cute. You just cruisin' or did somebody tell you 'bout me?"

"I just got a taste for a Coke."

"Sure you did!"

"I did." Lamely, Lon added, "I hadn't much else to do.”

"I bet you didn't know I work here," the girl teased. "No, not much."

Helplessly, Lon sensed insinuation. "What difference would that make? I don't know anybody you know. Anyway, what difference would it make?"

Violet's eyes widened. "No kiddin', you don't know any of the kids?”

"Oh, I know kids, but..."

“Our
kind a kids?" Then with something like awe. "Holy Mother, you ain't that dumb! I'd a swore...! Oh, Jeez, I woulda swore!" She looked over her shoulder as if to check the nearness of others. "I hang out at The 28%. Ever hear of it?"

"What's the 28%?"

"Gay joint Private, jest girls. I know all the kids hang out there." She lowered the hoarse voice. "Wanna go?"

"When, tonight?"

"Crazy. I get off ten-thirty."

"I don't know." Lon's glance fell to the low-slung jeans. "I'd have to go home and change." And added sheepishly, "I didn't bring... money."

"I get paid tonight Go on me."

"What is it some kind of girls' club?"

"Yeah, a gay club. Where the kids c'n dance. They have beer an' Coke—you know."

"I'd have to change," Lon said again.

"Nah, what for? Saturday night the butches wear good pants, but Friday night who cares?" She reached through the window to pat Lon's cheek. "Stick around, hon."

A blast from a front-row M.G. shook Violet from the window. "Ah, have y'self a hemrich, why dontcha?" And then to Lon, with the soft sound of old intimacy, "I gotta hop, sweetie. Don't go. I mean after, when you drink your Coke. Stick aroun'!"

Lon stuck around. Stuck after the syrupy drink tasted like melted ice and after three visits from the girl whose brows were a thin black pencil-line. Once she slipped into Luigi's phone booth to call home and tell her mother she had met some of the girls from school and was going to the show. And the fourth time Violet returned to the car, she had changed into purple toreodor pants, a bulky white sweater and spike-heeled gold slippers. Her mouth wore a fresh coat of orchid-pink lipstick and she smelled of violet cologne.

She bounced into the Plymouth, snuggling deep into the scratchy upholstery before she pulled the door shut "You're a doll, waitin' aroun'. This girlfriend of mine, she moved up t' Stockton an' I'm playin' the field nowadays. I sure am glad t' get a lift." Lon chugged the old car out of Luigi's lot into the street

She drove purposefully, following Violet's instructions, glad of the heavy Friday-night traffic that absorbed her wondering exultation. And Violet rattled on. The girl with the lavender hair seemed compelled to reveal in minute detail the story of her life.

She was nineteen. She lived in a rented house at the wrong end of the Valley. Her mother was out of town, workin' grab joints on the fair circuit which is what the old lady had been doing since they had left Cicero, Ill. That was after her old man beat the old lady up so bad and her an' the old lady had grabbed a bus for California, which was sure funny because one time in Chicago, before they moved to Cicero, they had lived in this flat on a street called California. How 'bout that? Violet was not insensitive to the strange twists of fate.

"I worked grab," she told Lon. "Jeez, I got so I come near pukin' if I smelled a hot-dog." But her old lady didn't trust her around the carnies or the carnies around her. Which was okay by Violet because she was makin' good hoppin' cars, not on'y in the fair season but all year. And which brought up another subject "We're Bohunks. What're you?"

Lon turned from the wheel, guessing at the question's meaning. "Welsh and English descent."

"Well, we're Bohem'an. My real first name is Fialka. That means Vi'let My last name's Polivka. You know what that means? Soup. Vi'let Soup. Ain't that a kill? Vi'let Soup."

Some of the tension eased away. Lon could laugh at this.

"Guys usta say, 'How's about a little hot soup?'
Horka polivka.
Jeez, it usta make me so mad." She remembered another important factor. "We're Cath'lic. You Cath'lic?"

"My folks go to the Methodist church," Lon told her. It would have taken too long to explain that God Tikitehatu and Goddess Hiuapopoia had produced life on the Island.

Violet grudgingly said, "I was scared maybe yez were Baptist Or them Witnesses. Methodist ain't too bad."

Lon laughed again. And to sober her, Violet said, "My old man froze t' death in a car barn. How 'bout that?"

"Froze?"

"You think it don't get cold back East? Wow!"

"Gee, what a rough thing to have happen.”

Violet laughed now, a tin-pan musical convulsion. "Oh, yeah? Try an' tell that t' my old lady." Then, evidently remembering, reporting dutifully: "Another reason I stay home, this carny got me in trouble. We had to adopt the baby out,
-
this place called St. Vincent's Foundling. You think I don't cry about that sometimes? Never again, believe you me, kid. She woulda been two years old. Jeez, I talk like she's dead. I mean she's two years now an' you know how cute you c'n dress kids that age. But Holy Christ on a bicycle, I mean t' tell you I had a hard time. I bit clean through my hand, if you wanna know. I could show you the scar, even."

There was another world beside the other people's world and her own. Maybe there were thousands of worlds, millions of worlds, one of them in purple pants and who knew how many others? Lon gunned the Plymouth to be on the safe side—to be sure she by-passed the new Buick when the light on Vineland Avenue turned green. And listened to the mysteries of a world much stranger than her own.

"So this bookkeeper where I worked—that was in this supermarket before I started at Luigi's. She was butch, same as you. All she ever did was wanta sit around her place makin' out. Jesus, I like t' get out, so that's why we broke up, but she made sure I got wise. I got more kicks with her than that damn lousy carny, an' no hospital, no baby. You get wise, you don't get hurt You'll find out, kid."

Lon nodded vague agreement. "Straight ahead?"

"Yeah, but pull over left. You're gonna make a turn in a couple blocks."

"Are you sure this is all right? My going to this place the way I look?"

"That's the nice thing about the twenny-eight. Anything goes. Rags, she's this girl that owns the place, her an' her girlfriend t'gether, she sometimes don't dress. Other times, wow, she wears these real crazy clothes, like she has this p'ticular beatnik outfit. Black suede pants an' shirt, kid— talk about crazy! She can afford clothes, the dough she makes. Half a buck fer Coke, same as beer—how 'about that? But I don' hold it against her. I seen her wear jeans plenny times. Not stuck-up or anything, kid. An' hell! It's about the on'y place around here the girls c'n dance."

The questions were stacked in layers at the back of Lon's mind, but now there was time for only one. "Why do they call it that? 28%. That can't be the address."

"Jest t' show you how cute this Rags is. She read this book by some doctor, he took like a survey an' in this book he claims twenny-eight per cent of women had somethin' t' do with some other woman sometime or other. So that's the whole idea behind why Rags named the club that. Cute?"

The question left Lon as confused as before—repelled by her own raw ignorance yet fascinated by the need for answers She drove the remaining blocks with the self-assured recklessness peculiar to drivers who can take their-car apart and put it back together again. She drove harshly yet floated on with the promised delights of the club named to honor a statistic. And breathed the delicate air of Parma violets.

CHAPTER 3

It was Rags who peered cautiously into the night, opening the drab green door of the lonely cement-block building at the end of the dark, undeveloped street. Lon knew Rags by the sharp black tux, the cerise bow-tie beneath a pallid, acne-scarred face. Rags stood sullen in the doorway, behind her an amateurishly lettered notice: THE 28%—
MEMBERS ONLY.

"What the hell's with the pounding?" Rags was no bigger than Violet, but the tough bass sound was enormous.

"Sweetie, meet this real good friend a mine. Lon Harris."

Unsmiling, Rags nodded. "Hiya, Lon."

Lon responded, "Hi!" And apparently being Violet's "good friend" meant open sesame. Friend and proprietress led Lon into the smoke-blue dimness. Lon blinked at the strangeness of the scene.

Rags hurried ahead, circling behind the long, home-built bar. She had been interrupted apparently, by Violet's hammering. But now she backed the girl Lon judged to be a barmaid-partner against a chipped and dented bottle cooler. Grimly, she clasped the taller girl in her arms. Kissed her as though it were a life-death matter. Lon watched, something forbidden stirring inside her. "Our kind of kids," Violet had said.
"Our kind of kids!"

Violet led Lon to the far end of the bar. She pounded amiably on the linoleum top. "Hey, quit makin' out. How's about some service?"

The girl in Rags's stranglehold laughed and pushed herself free. "That's what I'm getting! Break it up, honey. Vi wants a drink."

She came to their end of the bar, and Lon was introduced to "a real swell kid—Betty." Betty from out of a black-and-white movie; colorless, pale, like shoots that spring up from under sidewalks.

"We need a couple beers," Violet told her. "How 'bout that, Lon?"

"Right," Lon said. Using a ruggedly deep voice that came instinctively because she knew it would sound right. Betty took two brown bottles from the cooler, popped them open with a church key and set them on the bar.

"Most of the kids are in the other room," Violet said, swigging. "I'll go see if I c'n find us a table."

She wriggled her way toward the opening in the divided wall, stopping to scream,
"Hi,
doll!" to a girl in fly-front slacks and white T-shirt, Lon's size. And Violet hugged another girl, a pug-faced peroxide blonde. Violet shrieked, "Swee-tie-eee!" at another group and made her sensuous way to the rope curtains that divided the barroom from the room in which the shadow-forms of kids danced to a recording of
Lonely Street.
The kids, the kids... Violet glanced over her shoulder once to wink at Lon, to let her know, it seemed, that she knew the kids and the kids knew her and weren't they all having the craziest time?
Like Eddie,
thought Lon.
Eddie going to Disneyland with the family after having gone before with the Cubs—anxious to point out the sights and let everyone know in a loud voice that he had been there before.
Like a queer lavender Elsa Maxwell, Violet greeted the loved and the unloved, the staked and the cruising, disappearing finally into the packed room where the shadow-shapes clung to each other. Now she was singing in unison with the record:
"Perhaps upon that Lonely Street, there's someone such as I..."

Lon sipped beer. Sipped the new bitter taste and marveled at the way dry palm fronds and a raffia backing on the bar had given an exotic air to a cement-block garage.

Someone had painted a Hawaiian hula scene on the wall above the bar. Someone had sketched a likeness of Rags on the opposite wall, and had framed it with bamboo.
This is the way the clubhouse will look. This is the way we'll fix up the recreation hall on the Island!
She swigged from the bottle again, mellowing with the sense of a long-gone traveler at last arrived home. For the threesome at the other end of the bar were not unlike the traveler she had seen in mirrors, her own self.

They wore tan peggers, nonchalantly unpressed. Two in plaid flannel shirts, one sharper in an open-throated white job with a turquoise sweater vest. Lon envied them the clipped haircuts, the strong scrubbed faces. And ignored the lazy eyes and droop-cornered mouths.

"I still claim you owe me two-bits," one argued.

"The hell you say."

"You remember that girl, right here at this bar?”

"Oh, Jesus, yes."

"You bet me a quarter I couldn't make her.”

"You didn't.”

"Oh, didn't I?”

"I'll be damned."

"I've got a witness." The first of them turned to the silent one. "Did I make her, Chuck?"

"If you don't know, I'm not gonna tell you."

They roared at this and then the loser paid her bill. "Here's your goddam quarter. Just tell me one thing. Was she butch or fem? Christ, I couldn't tell!"

"Smorgasbord. By the time she went home I wasn't sure which I was!" Eyebrows wriggled up and down, implying secrets that could not be unveiled. Regular guys, remembering a girl and laughing it up. Regular guys, flicking kitchen matches with their thumbnails for a light, burrowing hands in the front-zipped pants for a crushed cigarette pack and belting each other in the back to punctuate a bellylaugh. Regular guys, and less than twenty years before, unknowing nurses had checked the wrong box on the hospital form that offered only
Male
and
Female.
For perhaps the choice was incomplete.

Halfway through the brown bottle, Violet came back. "I got a place at their table. This girl, kid—Jeez, she's society an' everything. Boy, would I like to get next to her. She's here with some crazy dark one. I hate t' say this, but this girl, wow, is she sharp." Violet spilled the words breathlessly. "I got a spot at their table. Pray for me, kid." Leading Lon from the bar toward the curtained room, frenzied with her dim hope of a conquest that escaped Lon. "Make out like I'm your girl. Act real nuts about me."