Turtleface and Beyond (15 page)

“Alice took Marvin out to pick up his medicine,” he said.

Bob could often be found sitting on Alice's couch like that. I offered him one of my beers and he accepted. I went into the kitchen to put the rest of them in the refrigerator and Bob said, “Aren't you going to have one?”

As I said, I'm not much of a drinker, but I opened one for myself anyway, just to please Bob. People don't like to drink alone, I've noticed.

Alice and Marvin didn't return for quite a while. Bob and I sat around discussing his lawsuit. He was suing somebody for running over his foot with a car. According to Bob it had caused him a lot of pain and discomfort. The problem was that he hadn't been holding a job at the time of the accident. If he had been, then he might've claimed lost wages. Instead it was all just pain and suffering, a difficult thing to quantify. A couple of times during our conversation Bob got up from the couch and walked to get something or go to the bathroom. I didn't notice much of a limp. Bob explained to me that when he went into court to discuss the matter he would use crutches and wear a brace on his foot. This would better illustrate his pain. He had a shrewd lawyer and expected to get between ten and fifteen thousand dollars.

Alice walked in holding Marvin's hand. Willy barked and ran up to Marvin. She liked him a lot, more than almost anyone else, besides me, of course. Marvin patted her fur, grabbing clumps of it in his callused hands. He made a little cooing noise and sniffed her back. That was how Marvin identified people, by their smell. Perhaps this was the connection which Willy and Marvin shared, the way they were always sniffing at things.

Alice saw me and said, “Oh, it's you.”

Bob got up and gave Alice a kiss on the cheek. I guess they were now dating. Bob said to Alice, “You want a beer? There's some in the fridge.”

Alice said, “I sure do,” and got one out. Bob didn't mention that it was me who had bought the beer. In fact, the way he said it, it seemed like he was the one who had gone out to get it. This sort of thing bothers me. But I didn't say anything about it right then.

Marvin came over and smelled my hand. He walked with his legs spread wide for balance and his head down, facing the floor. He waved his hands out in front of him to keep from bumping into things.

“Hi, Marvin,” I said, though I knew he couldn't hear me.

“He can't hear you,” said Bob.

“I know that,” I said.

Alice poured a glass of apple juice for Marvin and made him take his pills.

“How're you doing, Alice?” I asked.

“Not bad,” she said. With her finger she drew some symbols on Marvin's palm and he got up and went into the bathroom. Sometimes I tried to figure out just what Marvin made of all this. I wondered what he thought of the people and things around him. Did he even know we could see and hear things which he could not?

“I don't have any money for you,” said Alice. “Too bad you didn't get here a couple hours ago. I could have paid you then. But then Marvin wouldn't have gotten his medicine.”

“That's okay,” I said. “I didn't come for the money. I brought you some beer.”

“I know,” said Alice. She was holding the beer in her hand. I guess it wasn't necessary for me to point that out. Bob chuckled.

“I just came by to say hello,” I said.

“Oh, well, I'm glad you did,” said Alice. She said it with a flat tone, like she wasn't really so glad that I did, but I could stick around just the same.

Alice didn't owe me much money anyway. I couldn't remember if it was $28 or $35, or maybe it was $42. I had already suspected I would be leaving that place empty-handed anyway.

Bob got up to take another beer from the refrigerator. On his way back to the couch he stepped on Wilfred's tail. She yipped and growled at him.

“Oops,” said Bob. He sat back down on the couch.

Willy was still growling at Bob when Marvin ran out of the bathroom toward Alice. Marvin's leg bumped against the coffee table and Bob's beer tipped over onto the floor. Bob jumped up to save it and Willy lunged forward and bit him on the back of his leg.

“Ow!” screamed Bob. “Shit!”

He kicked at Willy, but missed her. I grabbed Willy and pulled her away. I scolded her and slapped her on the head, not very hard though. She wasn't ever a biter, not at all. I guess she didn't much like Bob.

Bob rolled up his pants leg and there were two little red marks where Wilfred's teeth had stuck in. She'd barely broken the skin. Her teeth weren't that sharp.

“I'm sorry about that, Bob,” I said.

“Yeah, all right,” he said, rubbing his leg.

“She doesn't usually do that,” I said.

“I didn't do anything to her,” he said.

“You stepped on her tail,” said Alice.

“That was before,” said Bob.

“She won't do it again,” I said.

“She better not,” said Bob. He winced a little each time he rubbed his leg, clearly trying to make a big show of it. Such behavior was probably ingrained in his system from all that faking he'd been doing in court.

I got up and opened a new beer for Bob. I opened one for Alice too, even though she wasn't really done with her first one. We sat around for a while and Alice told us about all the red tape she had to go through to get Marvin into the right school for the coming fall. Bob kept rubbing his leg and I felt awkward and decided it was time to go. I said goodbye to Marvin even though he couldn't hear me and took Willy by the collar to guide her out. It was raining then, but we needed to go anyway. We got all wet on the way home.

In the morning I went out to get some food and when I returned there was a policeman standing at my front door. He was writing on a pad of paper.

“Do you live here?” he asked me.

“Yes, I do,” I said. For a second I thought about saying no, just out of some vague feeling that deceiving the cops is usually a good idea, but then I decided against it.

“Is that your dog inside?” asked the cop.

Willy was barking at us from behind the closed door. I'm sure it had upset her to have that policeman just standing out there where she could smell and hear him. Once again I considered lying to the police, but I wasn't sure where that would lead me.

“Yes,” I said, “that's my dog.”

Willy was growling now in between her barks. I told her to be quiet. She stopped growling for about one second and then started up again.

“I'm investigating a complaint,” said the policeman.

“Oh man,” I said.

That jackass Bob. I should have known he couldn't resist.

“Did the dog bite someone yesterday?” asked the policeman.

“Not really,” I said. “She sort of did.”

“Either he did or he didn't,” said the policeman.

“She's a girl dog,” I pointed out. People always assume all dogs are boys.

The cop sighed. “So
she
bit someone,” he said. He began writing more words on his pad of paper.

“Are you giving me a ticket?” I asked. “It wasn't her fault. Bob stepped on her tail.”

“We're going to quarantine her,” said the cop. “Ten days.”

“What?” I said.

“For observation.”

I couldn't believe it. “Come on,” I said.

“Look,” said the cop, “it's standard procedure.” He certainly was fond of this official jargon. He ripped off the top sheet of paper from his pad and handed it to me.

“You can bring her down to Animal Control yourself or we can send a guy over to pick her up.”

“What if I refuse?” I said.

“Then we'll issue a warrant for your arrest,” he said, “and your dog will be shot.”

“You can't do that,” I said.

“Yes, we can,” said the cop. I could tell he wasn't really ready to go through with the arrest-and-shoot plan, but I didn't want to test him.

“When do I have to bring her in?” I asked.

Willy was still growling from behind the door. The cop hadn't even seen her. It seemed like he was a little bit afraid of her, like if I'd opened the door he would have drawn his gun.

“You can bring her in tomorrow,” said the cop. He walked away and left me there with his citation. That dumbass Bob was going to hear from me about this.

Since I didn't know where Bob lived I went back to Alice's place to see if he was there. I left Willy behind so as to avoid any further trouble. When I arrived the door was unlocked and Marvin was sitting on the floor playing with his wooden blocks. He had this set of blocks which he liked to stack up, one on top of the other, and then knock down. He could play with those things endlessly. I walked up to him and let him smell my hand. He tried to get me to play with the blocks as well but I wasn't interested. I began looking around for a piece of paper on which to write a note to Alice. As I was doing this Alice walked in, with Bob.

Bob said, “What are you doing here?”

“I was looking for you,” I said.

“I'm right here,” said Bob.

Alice was eyeing me with suspicion because I'd been rummaging around the stuff on her table.

“I was looking for a piece of paper,” I said, “to write a note.”

“Oh,” she said. She went over to the fridge and put a new pack of beer inside it. She offered one to me but I said, “No, thanks.”

Bob took one though. So did Alice.

“Why did you report my dog to the police?” I asked Bob.

“She bit me,” he said.

“Now they want to take her away,” I said, “they want to put her in quarantine.”

“So?” said Bob.

“It was your fault,” I said. “You stepped on her tail.”

“That was before,” said Bob. “She bit me later on.”

Alice took a big swig of her beer and looked at Bob. “Why did you need to go fill out that report anyway?” she said.

“I had to,” said Bob, “for the medical benefits to kick in.”

That stupid fuck, Bob. He was always trying to work the system. “Well, I'd like you to take it back,” I said. “Go tell them it was a mistake. I'm not putting my dog in jail.”

“I can't do that,” said Bob. “It's out of my hands.”

I got upset then. I don't like it when people get slippery and say things like, “It's out of my hands.” I stepped over Marvin and his pile of blocks and pushed Bob against the wall. I was going to take a swing at him but he hit me first with his bottle of beer. He hit me right on the side of the head. At first it didn't hurt but then I felt this sharp pain and my vision went fuzzy.

I woke up on the couch. Alice was wiping my forehead with a wet towel while Bob paced around puffing on a cigarette. For a moment I couldn't remember what had happened and I wondered why I was there. I tried to sit up but Alice held me down.

“Hold on,” she said, “you'll get blood everywhere.”

I shut my eyes again and I either fell asleep or passed out. When I opened my eyes Alice and Bob were talking in the kitchen. She was calling him a “dumb fuck.” Marvin was still fiddling around with his blocks. He seemed a little nervous, perhaps sensing some of the uneasiness floating in the air. I remembered it then, that Bob had hit me with his bottle. My head hurt. I thought about grabbing something heavy and hitting Bob with it, but I didn't have the energy. Instead I got up very quietly and walked out. When the door shut behind me I heard Alice say, “Hey, where are you going?”

I didn't stop. I walked down the stairs. I think Bob said something to Alice, something like, “Just let him go.”

There was a cut on the side of my forehead, near my temple. I stopped in front of a store window and looked at my reflection in the glass. It wasn't a bad cut, but it wouldn't stop bleeding. People stared at me as I walked down the street.

When I got home I called out for Willy but she didn't come. I looked everywhere for her but she was gone. Then I looked outside and saw the official notice lying on the mat by my door. It was from Animal Control.

“Oh fuck,” I said.

They had come and taken her into quarantine. That policeman knew I'd never take her down there myself. I was feeling crazy now. I was mad at the policeman and that bastard Bob and the lackeys at the dog pound and even Alice and blind and deaf Marvin too. They could all go to hell. I ran outside and got lost about seven times trying to figure out where the Animal Control Center was. Finally I located it. I had to cross a highway on foot to get there.

The woman at the desk looked at me funny because of the blood on my forehead. Plus I was sweating and out of breath. I looked like a loony, I'm sure.

“I've come to get my dog,” I said.

I had meant to say “see my dog” but the word “get” just slipped out. We went over the details of her quarantine, the woman at the desk and I. She was actually very nice. I guess she'd seen this kind of thing before, frantic dog owners. She told me I could go visit Willy, but I wasn't allowed to take her home, not until the ten days were up.

I walked down the rows of cages, past all of those poor barking dogs. It made me even more sad than I already was, seeing those dogs locked up like that. They just wanted good homes, nice owners, and here they were stuck in crummy cages. It was a very depressing place. It smelled bad too, like dog urine.

When I got to Willy's cage it was strange to see her inside there. It looked all wrong, my dog among these outcasts. She wasn't barking like the others. She was lying down in the back, curled up in a ball. I felt sick seeing her like that. I called out her name and she jumped up. She was so glad to see me that she got frantic. She raked her paws against the cage and let out these high-pitched yelps. I thought there would be a lock on her cage, but there wasn't. It was just a latch. So I let myself inside. Willy was so excited that she knocked over her bowls of water and food. The little nuggets were scattered all over the floor and the water made a puddle on the concrete.