Tryst (13 page)

Talie

He was insatiable. We had sex three times after he came inside. Once on the floor, once against the wall
, and once across the kitchen counter.

Aunt Ruth would likely be appalled.

I had never been so satisfied.

After that third time
, he carried me to the couch, where we both collapsed, sweaty and exhausted, and at some point I fell asleep. I woke with the sun streaming through the doors, and Gavin was gone.

My body ached in places that it hadn’t ached in years as I wandered into the bathroom for a long
, hot shower. Languid wasn’t quite the word I would use to describe how I felt. I was definitely relaxed, but I also hadn’t felt better.

God, the things he did to my body were brilliant. He knew exactly where to touch, where to stroke
, and when to go hard at me. Frankly, I was glad he wasn’t here. I might be embarrassed over all the noise I made last night. I wouldn’t be surprised if my voice was hoarse.

The hot spray of the shower was like heaven raining down. I stood beneath the falling water
, letting it coat my body, letting it wash away the remnants of last night. It didn’t make me sad because I knew he’d be back. I didn’t know when, but I knew I hadn’t seen the last of Gavin.

I couldn’t stand the heat of the water against my sunburn for very long
, so I backed out and adjusted the temperature. I washed my hair first, noticing the way the bubbles slid down over my body on their way to the drain. I was so aware of myself, of my body… of how every single thing felt.

It was as if Gavin somehow
flipped a switch within me and every little thing I missed before was now felt tenfold.

I turned after rinsing away the suds and let the spray caress my face, giving a sigh of appreciation.

Cold air from the bathroom washed over my backside when the shower door opened. I spun, blinking the water from my lashes.

Gavin stood there completely naked, his blue eyes glittering. I gave him a small smile, surprised to see him again so soon. New tendrils of desire curled up from within
, coating the insides of my body. Oh, I wanted him. I didn’t think I would ever
not
want him.

But I was a little nervous if my body would be able to accept him. The folds of my vagina were tender and swollen from last night’s sex marathon.

He didn’t say anything but picked up the bar of soap and lathered his hands. I turned around, giving him my back, and the feel of his large, soapy palms sliding over my skin was heaven. He kneaded my muscles, working the tension out of them, truly giving me that languid feeling.

His hands worked downward, each palm gripping my butt as he gave it a squeeze.

“Fuck, I love your body,” he murmured, nuzzling his lips against the side of my neck. I felt the tip of his tongue sweep over my skin to catch some of the water. “Your curves are perfect. It gives me something to hold on to when I drive myself inside you.”

I shuddered. He was a talker. He liked to tell me what he was going to do to me and when. It was freaking erotic. He shifted, bending at the knees
, and his hardness brushed against my backside. After stroking himself against me for a few blissful minutes, his hands went back to washing, down the backs of my legs and flirting with the insides of my thighs.

His brazen hands slid upward, cupping around
my front, delving into the short, textured curls of my sex, and he slipped a single finger along my folds. He growled a little at the slick heat that was waiting for him and nipped at my shoulder with his teeth.

On up he continued until both his hands were full with my breasts
, and he pulled me back against him, my back against his front as he caressed the full, swollen globes. One hand came up to roughly grab my chin, and he turned my head to the side so he could cover my lips with his.

Rivulets of water slid between us as we kissed, some of the water entering my mouth and some entering his. He hunched around me so the spray didn’t get me in the eyes
, but bounced off his shoulder, like he was my personal umbrella.

The next thing I knew
, he was turning us so I was out of the spray and it cascaded over his back as he knelt down in front of me. “Open for me,” he rasped.

I braced one of my feet on the edge of the tub and the other against the far wall.

He looked up at me with water drops in his lashes, framing out the concentrated cobalt of his eyes. Water rushed over his cheeks and traced his lips. His fingers parted my folds. “Are you sore?” he asked, taking in the swollen yet still ready flesh.

“A little,” I admitted.

Gavin brought his mouth up and covered my clit. He was gentle, carefully licking and suckling at the entire area until my legs shook so badly I couldn’t stand.

He released me to stand up, lifting me off my feet and laying me across the bot
tom of the shower. The spray turned slightly cooler, but it was only hitting against my feet. Gavin pushed my legs apart and lowered onto his knees between them. He looked like some kind of model with water slicing over his cut, tanned body.

His hair was wet, darker than normal
, and hung over his forehead, dripping even more water into his face. He still hadn’t shaved and drops of water clung to the stubble like it did his lashes.

He came back down to lick me again,
and I made a slight sound of protest yet also of pleasure. He lifted his head, gazing up across my body.

“Tell me what you want.”

“No.” I refused.

He lifted his brows. “No?”

I shook my head. “I want you to know. I want you to give me exactly what I want without having to ask.”

A secret smile curved his lips. He came over me, his wet, stiff cock sliding right against my slit.

I moaned.

“I don’t want to hurt you.”

I opened my eyes and looked up at him. I know I wasn’t supposed to know about him, that who he was didn’t factor into this. But these kinds of situations taught you a lot about a person.

He could have pounded into me. He could have claimed me roughly like he did before. But he didn’t. He knew I was sore. Whether he wanted to admit i
t or not, he cared how I felt. At least physically.

“You won’t
,” I whispered, reaching up to touch his face.

He closed his eyes, cutting of the blue that had truly become my favorite color
, and slid into me oh so carefully.

This wasn’t the like the other times. This wasn’t fast and hard. Gavin took his time. Slipping in and out of me with ease. It didn’t hurt at all. My body knew him now
. It accepted him… It trusted him.

As he moved
, I trailed my fingers over his body, fingered the cuts of his abs, and gripped the strong hips at his waist. I’d never felt like this before. I’d never felt so utterly caught up in someone. He was all I saw, all I wanted to see.

I didn’t know him, not at all. But I felt him. It was like we connected on a completely different level, one that went beyond knowing each other’s favorite color and what led us here.

I felt the familiar tightening of my lower abs, and I knew that release was near. It was almost sad. I would miss having him inside me.

I glanced up
. He was watching me. His eyes were eating up my face like he’d never really looked at me before. Our eyes connected and held. Chemistry bound us together, emotion welled up, and I knew he could feel it swirling between us.

It was too strong to deny.

“I’m going to need you to come, sweetheart,” he said, unable to look away. His neck strained as he held back his own release.

I sucked the water off my bottom lip and nodded. He surged a little bit deeper and rocked upward, his length scraping the inner wall of my vagina.

Pleasure bloomed, like a flower under the warm, nourishing rays of the sun. It spread out through my limbs, making me weak. I held his gaze, even after my vision had gone blurry. I wanted him to see the way he affected me, the way he made my body sing.

I felt his seed spill into me
. I welcomed it. He shuddered his release as the shower water continued to pour over our bodies.

Neither of us moved, even when the water turned frigidly cold. I couldn’t feel it anyway. The only thing I could feel was him.

Gavin shifted his weight and reached down, pushing the wet strands of hair off my face. Our eyes met once more and something passed between us. Something more than physical attraction.

I turned my face into his hand without thinking. He stroked my lips with the pad of his thumb.
Lowering himself, he grazed the side of my mouth with his, tenderly brushing a kiss against my flesh.

I looked up at him and smiled.

The moment was shattered.

It was almost like I could see reality creeping up on him. The chains of whatever bound him yanked him away just as he was beginning to open up.

He swallowed thickly, panic crossing his features. He pushed up away from me, putting space between us.

Then h
e left me there in the bottom of the shower, cold spray raining down upon me.

Talie

Gavin came to me twice more during the next three days. Both times were in the middle of the night. He would enter my room in the dark of the night and slip between the sheets to bring his body flush against mine.

Both times I was asleep, and he would bring me awake slowly, using his mouth and hands. In the morning, I would wake and he wouldn’t be there, leaving me to wonder if it had only been a dream.

I knew it wasn’t for two reasons:

1. My inner thighs were sticky from his release

a
nd

2.
Dreams couldn’t be that good.

Both mornings I would sit out on the deck with a mug full of coffee and pretend to look at the view. But I wasn’t seeing the view. I was reliving the way he made my body tingle; I was remembering the sound of his soft sighs in the dark.

I knew why he was showing up at night. It was because of the feelings. The feelings that kept bubbling to the surface whenever he looked into my eyes or entered my body. He thought coming when I was asleep would change it. He thought the darkness would make what lay between us harder to see.

It wasn’t.

I could be blind and I would still see the way he made me feel.

What started out as intense chemistry was slowly morphing into more.

He was scared. So was I.

Blake hurt me. He hurt me more than I ever even realized. He’d been hurting me long before I caught him cheating. He hurt me when he acted like I was less than him, like I was privileged to be selected by him.
He belittled me in ways I never saw until I took a very large step back and really looked. I know that Blake likely loved me, but I didn’t like his version of love.

But even though
Blake wasn’t good for me, I loved him. That in itself was the scariest thing of all. Because if Blake—a man I loved—had that much power to hurt me, then Gavin… Well, Gavin had the power to completely obliterate me.

What I felt for Blake was merely a tenth of what I felt for him.

I wasn’t even in love with Gavin. Not yet. But I wasn’t going to be able to stop my heart’s fall.
I should march over there and tell him the deal is off. I should tell him I am done being his no-strings-attached tryst.

I couldn’t.

I craved him like an addict craved heroine. My body longed for him like it should water. There was something intoxicating about being in his presence. It’s like every little thing, right down to the way I drew in a breath, was intensified when Gavin was near.

When this little affair was over… I was very scared
of what would happen.

I heard the door to his deck slide open, and he stepped out. He was eating a pack of snack cakes and standing at the railing in his boxers
, looking out over the ocean. His hair was sticking up from sleep. He didn’t glance this way. I was sure he didn’t know I was looking.

He was a beautiful man.

Beautifully broken.

Something shattered him. I
didn’t know what it was or when it happened, but I knew he was broken. He thought all of him was out of order, but I knew different. I saw the signs of life behind his eyes. I saw the glimpses of existence when he thought I didn’t. Gavin might be broken, but some of him could be put back together.

He turned from the railing and looked in my direction. He stilled when he saw me watching.
He shoved the rest of his snack cake in his mouth and gestured to me while he was chewing.

I left the blanket in my chair and wandered across the sand, wearing a little pair of sleep shorts and a tank top with no bra. He was standing at the top of the stairs waiting
, and when I stepped onto the deck, he took my coffee from my hands and took a healthy drink out of the mug.

Something in my belly squirmed at the knowledge he was sharing my cup.
Yeah, silly, I know. We’d had sex many times. We’d exchanged more than we ever could just by sharing a cup. But some things were just intimate that way.

“I’m out of coffee,” he said, handing the cup back to me.

“Keep it,” I replied. I was too busy daydreaming to drink it anyway.

He must have been in a daydreaming frame of mind as well because he took my hand and tugged me along with him toward a lounge chair. He sat and pulled me into his lap.

Gavin’s arms folded around me, his hands clutching the mug in front of us. His scratchy chin rested on my bare shoulder. “Cold this morning,” he said, his voice secret-soft.

My eyes fluttered closed and something in me splintered. If there was any hope of keeping my feelings safe from him
, I couldn’t sit here in his lap, being cuddled like he wanted to protect me from the wind.

But, oh my
God, I couldn’t move.

Being in his arms like this was absolute heaven. The area just below my ribs burned with emotion, buzzed with the wings of a thousand butterflies. It was like I waited my entire life to be wrapped up in someone like this and the moment had finally arrived.

Please, God, don’t let this moment be fleeting.

I took a chance and relaxed into him, letting him support the majority of my weight. He tucked me closer against him, so close I could feel his warm breath fan out against my neck.

I shut my eyes, trying to memorize this feeling, planning to bank it away. This feeling was almost more intense than sex. It was wrapping its way around my heart and squeezing. I had to remember. I had to remember this feeling so when it was gone I would never forget.

One of his arms pulled back so he could drink more of the coffee. When he was finished
, I felt him study me. “You okay?”

I turned to glance over my shoulder at him. He was so incredibly close. My heart puffed up just looking at him. I smiled and nodded. “Mm
-hmm.”

“Come here,” he murmured, s
etting aside the mug and pulling me in. I rested my cheek against his bare shoulder and folded my knees up against my chest. He was so much bigger that when he wrapped his arms around me, I was totally surrounded.

His faint coconut scent swirled around me
, and I took a deep breath, letting my eyes flutter closed.

“What am I gonna do with you, Talie?”
he mused, almost as if he were talking to himself.

Love me.

The thought caught me off guard. My insides stilled even as the rest of the world kept moving. Did I want Gavin to love me?

Did I love him?

My heart started to hammer, pounding tenaciously in my chest. Love was out of the question. It wasn’t possible. I couldn’t end one relationship and then just give my heart to another.

“Talie?” Gavin asked, dipping his chin down to where my head rested. “What’s wrong?”

He was picking up on my feelings. He could feel the change in the air. We were so connected by some kind of invisible chemistry that I couldn’t even freak out without him knowing.

I sat up
. Gavin wrapped a large palm around my upper arm, like he was my anchor in a choppy sea. I looked at him wide-eyed, trying to understand what the hell was happening inside me.

“Your eyes are the color of sea
glass,” he murmured. “A hazy green.”

“Gavin
…” I started. Words bubbled up inside me like a witch’s brew, threatening to spill out between us. He tucked a strand of wayward blond hair behind my ear and waited for me to continue.

Somewhere off
to the side, a phone rang.

He sighed. “I shouldn’t have brought that thing out here.”

“You have a phone?” I said, surprise in my tone.

He chuckled. “I’m not a complete hermit.”

He stood, taking me with him and setting me in the chair alone. I watched the strong muscles in his back as he snagged the phone from the chair behind us. “Yeah?” he said in way of greeting.

“Hey
, Stitch,” he said, and a little of his carefree mood disappeared.

I peeked around the chair at him, watching as he paced the deck.

“Yeah, yeah, I know,” he said, running a hand through his hair.

Pause.

“I told you I’m not ready,” he burst quietly, turning away from me. Tension radiated from his body.

Another pause.

“When?” He blew out a breath and muttered a curse word. “Today!”

I don’t know if the person on the other end of the line had time to reply or not because then he growled. “Why didn’t you tell me this before?”

I heard a raised voice on the other end but couldn’t make out what he was saying.

“Fine
,” Gavin snapped.

More talking.

“Yes, I’ll be there.” He paused again. “I don’t know.”

He spun, spearing me with a look. Whatever had just been happening between us, those soft little moments… they were gone.

“Yeah. See you then.” He snapped the phone shut and opened the back door, tossing it inside.

“Who was that?” I asked.

“I told you I won’t talk about my life,” he snapped.

I surged up from my seat. “It was one question!” I yelled. “
You’re
the one who called me over here.
You’re
the one who pulled me into your lap.
You’re
the one who made me feel something.”

Gavin’s eyes narrowed. “I told you not to feel anything.”

Oh shit, I was going to cry.

“Don’t bother coming over tonight
,” I said, lifting my chin. “The door will be locked.”

I strode off the deck, racing across the sand and into my house. Salty was sitting on the floor by the door when I rushed in. I burst into tears the second the door shut.

“Stupid!” I told myself and flung across the couch, burying my head in a pillow. The sobs came even though I told them not to. Once one bubbled out, the rest followed. I lay there and cried until I ran out of tears.

I must have been pretty pathetic because Salty, the cat who hated me, jumped up beside me and started to pur
r.

“He told me not to feel anything, Salty,” I told the cat.

“But I didn’t listen.”