Trying to Find Chinatown: The Selected Plays of David Henry Hwang

BOOK: Trying to Find Chinatown: The Selected Plays of David Henry Hwang
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Table of Contents
 
FOB
 
(1980)
 
For the warriors of my family
 
Production History
 
FOB
received its premiere at the Stanford Asian American Theatre Project (Nancy Takahashi, Producer) in Palo Alto, California, on March 2, 1979. It was directed by David Henry Hwang; the assistant director was Randall Tong; the set design was by George Prince; the costume design was by Kathy Ko and the lighting design was by Roger Tang. The cast was as follows:
 
DALE
Loren Fong
GRACE
Hope Nakamura
STEVE
David Pating
 
 
The play was then developed at the Eugene O’Neill National Playwrights Conference (Lloyd Richards, Artistic Director) in Waterford, Connecticut, in July 1979. It was directed by Robert Alan Ackerman. The cast was as follows:
 
DALE
Calvin Jung
GRACE
Ginny Yang
STEVE
Ernest Abuba
 
 
FOB
opened at The Joseph Papp Public Theater/New York Shakespeare Festival (Joseph Papp, Producer), in New York City on June 8, 1980. It was directed by Mako; the assistant director was David Oyama; the set design was by Akira Yoshimura and James E. Mayo; the costume design was by Susan Hum; the lighting design was by Victor En Yu Tan; the choreography was by John Lone; the music was by Lucia Hwong; and the stage manager was Ruth Kreshka. There were also two onstage stage managers, Willy Corpus and Tzi Ma, as well as an onstage musician, Lucia Hwong, in this production. The cast was as follows:
 
DALE
Calvin Jung
GRACE
Ginny Yang
STEVE
John Lone
 
 
Characters
 
DALE, a second-generation American of Chinese descent, early twenties.
GRACE, Dale’s cousin, a first-generation Chinese-American, early twenties.
STEVE, Grace’s friend, a Chinese newcomer, early twenties.
 
 
Place
 
The back room of a small Chinese restaurant in Torrance, California.
 
 
Time
 
1980.
ACT I,
Scene One:
late afternoon.
Scene Two:
a few minutes later.
ACT II: after dinner.
 
 
Definitions
 
chong you bing
is a type of Chinese pancake, a Northern Chinese appetizer often made with dough and scallions, with a consistency similar to that of pita bread.
da dao
and
mao
are two swords, the traditional weapons of Gwan Gung and Fa Mu Lan, respectively.
Gung Gung
means “grandfather.”
Mei Guo
means “beautiful country” and is a Chinese term for America.
 
Playwright’s Note
 
The roots of
FOB
are thoroughly American. The play began when a sketch I was writing about a limousine trip through Westwood, California, was invaded by two figures from American literature: Fa Mu Lan, the girl who takes her father’s place in battle, from Maxine Hong Kingston’s
The Woman Warrior
, and Gwan Gung, the god of fighters and writers, from Frank Chin’s
Gee, Pop!
These books testify to the existence of an Asian-American literary tradition. Japanese-Americans, for instance, wrote plays in American concentration camps during World War II. Earlier, with the emergence of the railroads, came regular performances of Cantonese operas featuring Gwan Gung, the adopted god of Chinese America.
 
Prologue
 
Lights up on a blackboard. Dale enters, dressed in preppie clothes. The blackboard is the type which can flip around so both sides can be used. Dale lectures like a university professor, using the board to illustrate his points.
 
DALE: F-O-B. Fresh Off the Boat. FOB. What words can you think of that characterize the FOB? Clumsy, ugly, greasy FOB. Loud, stupid, four-eyed FOB. Big feet. Horny. Like Lenny in
Of Mice and Men
. Very good. A literary reference. High-water pants. Floods, to be exact. Someone you wouldn’t want your sister to marry. If you are a sister, someone you wouldn’t want to marry. That assumes we’re talking about boy FOBs, of course. But girl FOBs aren’t really as... FOBish. Boy FOBs are the worst, the... pits. They are the sworn enemies of all ABC—oh, that’s “American-Born Chinese”—of all ABC girls. Before an ABC girl will be seen on a Friday night with a boy FOB in Westwood, she would rather burn off her face.
(He flips around the board. On the other side is written: “1. Where to Find FOBs. 2. How to Spot a FOB. ”)
 
 
FOBs can be found in great numbers almost anyplace you happen to be, but there are some locations where they cluster in particularly large swarms. Community colleges, Chinese club discos, Asian sororities, Asian fraternities, Oriental churches, shopping malls and, of course, Bee Gee concerts. How can you spot a FOB? Look out! If you can’t answer that, you might be one.
(He flips back the board, reviews)
F-O-B. Fresh Off the Boat. FOB. Clumsy, ugly, greasy FOB. Loud, stupid, four-eyed FOB. Big feet. Horny. Like Lenny in
Of Mice and Men
. Floods. Like Lenny in
Of Mice and Men
. F-O-B. Fresh Off the Boat. FOB.
 
(Lights fade to black. We hear American pop music, preferably funk, rhythm and blues, or disco.)
ACT I
 
Scene One
 
Late afternoon. The back room of a small Chinese restaurant in Torrance, California. Single table, with a tablecloth; various chairs, supplies. One door leads outside, a back exit; another leads to the kitchen . Lights up on Grace, at the table. The music is coming from a small radio. On the table is a small, partially wrapped box and a huge blob of discarded Scotch tape. As Grace tries to wrap the box, we see what has been happening: the tape she’s using is stuck in the dispenser; so, in order to pull it out, she must tug so hard that an unusable quantity of tape is dispensed. Steve enters from the back door, unnoticed by Grace. He stands, waiting to catch her eye, tries to speak, but his voice is drowned out by the music. He is dressed in a stylish summer outfit.
 
GRACE: Aaaai-ya!
STEVE: Hey!
(No response; he turns off the music.)
 
GRACE: Huh? Look. Out of tape.
STEVE
(In Chinese)
: Yeah.
GRACE: One whole roll. You know how much of it got on here? Look. That much. That’s all.
STEVE
(In Chinese)
: Yeah. Do you serve
chong you bing
today?
GRACE
(Picking up box)
: Could’ve skipped the wrapping paper, just covered it with tape.
STEVE
(In Chinese)
: Excuse me!
GRACE: Yeah?
(Pause)
You wouldn’t have any on you, would ya?
STEVE
(Speaking English from now onward)
: Sorry? No. I don’t have
bing
. I want to buy
bing
.
GRACE: Not
bing
! Tape. Have you got any tape?
STEVE: Tape? Of course I don’t have tape.
GRACE: Just checking.
STEVE: Do you have any
bing
?
(Pause.)
 
GRACE: Look, we’re closed ’til five...
STEVE: Idiot girl.
GRACE: Why don’t you take a menu?
STEVE: I want you to tell me!
(Pause.)
 
GRACE
(Ignoring Steve)
: Working in a Chinese restaurant, you learn to deal with obnoxious customers.
STEVE: Hey! You!
GRACE: If the customer’s Chinese, you insult them by giving forks.
STEVE: I said I want you to tell me!
GRACE: If the customer’s Anglo, you starve them by not giving forks.
STEVE: You serve
bing
or not?

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