Trust: Betrayed (50 page)

Mmm. I want...
Unconsciously, Sophia licked her lips. She wanted to be one of those pink Octopuses imprinted on his shorts.

Her eyes climbed up his tapered waist where she liked to dig her nails in while he thrust in her, lingering over his luscious dark-pink mouth and ending up in his wondrous emerald green eyes.

He stood rigidly before her, his expression inscrutable.

Sophia. If you keep eyeing me like I am edible, I am going to drag you to my room and indulge you.
Alistair could see her mind working on her expressive face. She was debating whether she should run or not.

For a long moment, he simply held her gaze, his own veiled, impossible to read. Then he held out his hand and repeated, “Join me.”
I want to hold your slick body in my arms in the water.

From the corner of her eye, Sophia noticed that Edward and Felipe had moved to the far corner of the terrace and were entering the jacuzzi, feigning blindness and deafness. She bit her lip as she toyed with her long hair draped over one shoulder.
I can’t. You are going to be mad if you see what I have done.

Alistair tsked and his mouth softened fleetingly as he lowered his teeth on his own bottom lip.

“You know what that does to me. If you stop biting your lip,
I
promise not to bite.” His green gaze remained intense, focused on her face. “Join me.”

Her eyes locked on his, she released her lip and shook her head, saying in a throaty voice, “I’ve already showered.”

He laughed and bent to whisper on her lips, “Liar.” He took her left hand and made her stand up. He placed her hand on his chest, running it down and stopped at the band of his shorts. “You know you wouldn’t resist me.”

She tried to free her hand from his. He hesitated for a split second, before putting the tip of her index finger in his mouth and slowly, so very slowly drew it out. “I see you’re still using our commitment ring.”

Her fingers closed in a fist and she looked down at the Cartier ring on her right hand. He had branded her as his. “Oh, yes, force of habit,” she murmured.
Damn, caught red handed.

As if you’d forgotten you were wearing the ring, Sophia.
“You will not take it off,” he ordered.

Lord Tyrant.
“Oh. No?” Sophia looked into his narrowed eyes, then mimicking his move, she narrowed her eyes and lifted her chin defiantly. “I’m not yours to be ordered.”

Not yet, you mean.
“You will be,” he stated, frowning down at her. “Come with me. I have to grab a towel. I’m all wet.”
I want you wet with me.

She shot him a resigned glance. Immediately, his arm went around her back and his hand possessively gripped her waist. Even though his touch had not been rough, she flinched.

“I’m sorry. Are you still sore?” He scanned her face. “How are the stitches? I’m taking you to a doctor. Immediately.”

Change the subject. Quickly.
“I cannot marry you, Alistair Connor.”

Spare me stubborn wee lasses.
He frowned, forgetting her pain as a more pressing matter presented itself. “Why not?”

Distractedly, she twirled her raven hair around her right hand. “We are too different.”

Really? What excuse are you concocting now?
His frown turned dark. He’d started walking inside, and without thinking, Sophia followed.
Differences are good.
“Would you care to point out our unresolved differences, please?” He paused to pick up a towel to put around his neck and one around his waist.

Sophia didn’t pay attention as she was trying to think of an answer and continued walking.
Okay. Let’s try another approach.
“You’re a despot, an unmitigated tyrant, utterly used to having your own-”

“Jesus. Christ.” His shocked and outraged gasp interrupted her.

She halted and looked over her shoulder. When she noticed that she’d turned her back to him and that it wasn’t covered by her long hair, it was too late.

Of course, he would see the marks under this sheer caftan. Of course, he would know instantly how I got them.
She spun around, facing him, pushing her hair to cover her back. “It’s not what-”

“Fucking lie.” His muttered curse stopped whatever lame excuse she was planning on saying.

“My. Room.
Now!”
Alistair hissed at her and gripped Sophia’s hand, dragging her through the hotel corridor.

She didn’t try to stop him. His jaw was set and it made him look like a gargoyle, albeit a sexy one.

She sighed as she tried to keep up with his large strides.
Oh. How am I going to explain this?

Alistair’s senior suite.

5.48 p.m.

He shut the door quietly behind him, but the soft click on the lock made Sophia tremble. “In the bedroom,” he directed her.

Oh my God. Where should I begin?
She walked into the bedroom and turned her back to the balcony doors, avoiding his look.

Alistair stood frozen by the large door of the room, looking at her retreating back. He knew those marks. He wish he didn’t, but he could recognize welts like that instantly. He had seen them on Heather’s body more than once when they were joined by Emma, who liked to push the limits.
Who did this to her? What the fuck is going on?
He closed the double doors, which separated the bedroom from the rest of the suite.

Alistair’s glorious shoulders and pectorals were still glistening from the pool and the drops of water that fell from his long wet bangs.

Her mouth went dry at his sight and she immediately forgot why she was in his suite. She licked her lips and fisted her hands to prevent them from seeking his smooth and hard chest.

She made an effort to look away. If she kept staring at him, she would jump his bones then and there.

He glanced down and narrowed his eyes at her.

“Undress,” he ordered harshly. She looked at him with a scared look on her face, and he added with a softer voice, “Please.”

“Let me expla-”

“I won’t ask again, Sophia. If you don’t undress, I’ll do it for you.”

Oh? Damn you, Alistair Connor.
Sophia stood, raising her chin. “I don’t owe you any explanations.”

“Sophia.” He stepped closer, so close that she could feel the heat of his body. “I will rip this transparent thing off your body-”

“Very well.” She drew in a fortifying breath and undid the ties on her caftan, pushing it off her shoulders. It fell to the ground in a pool of sheer silk, leaving her wearing only a red and white strapless swimsuit.

Alistair’s mind was bubbling with many emotions, questions and doubts. “Turn,” he ordered.

“Alistair Co-”

“TURN!”

She turned, facing the glass doors.

He cautiously pushed her hair away and lowered the swimsuit, baring her to the waist. He hissed through clench teeth in horror.

Sophia’s back was marked with yellowing welts. One of the longer ones crossed from her left side just above her waist to below her right shoulder blade.

“Sophia...” he whispered, astounded by the savagery apparent in the marks. “Who did this to you?”

“I-I did,” she answered so softly that he thought he’d misheard. “I bought a... A strange whip. A cat-something. And tried it... I mean, on myself. I needed to know if I could handle it. The pain, I-I mean.”

She was stammering. She was trembling. She knew. But she couldn’t stop herself.

He didn’t say a word, his eyes fixed on her bruised back.

She rambled on, “I thought of how strong you are. And I-I hit myself as yo-you would.”

Alistair choked, horrified as he’d never been in his whole life.

The anger that surged in him was visceral, a raw feeling directed at himself and fed by the loathsome memories of violence and his perverse behavior.
I should have gotten rid of everything. I should never have introduced Sophia to this world.

He clenched his jaw with so much force that his teeth gnashed. He walked around her, searching for more marks, but found none.

The sight of Sophia’s bowed head, her long hair partly concealing her face, partly covering her arms and breasts made his anger disappear, replaced by a deep despair. “Why, Sophia? Tell me, why?” His voice sounded hollow.

She shrugged as she pulled her swimsuit up. “I needed to know what it was like,” she explained as she put on her caftan. “Where you would take me.”

She flung the doors of the balcony open and walked out, breathing in the cold fresh air.

Quietly, he followed her, feeling disoriented and unsettled.

She caught her breath as his hands gently rested on her shoulders.

“I’m sorry, Sophia.”

Sophia turned and looked up into the forest green eyes that she so loved. “I’m sorry too. It was stupid. I didn’t-”

“Nae,” he put a finger on her lips and shook his head. “
I am
sorry. So very sorry. What you did, what you experienced alone,” he shook his head, horrified, “it’s completely different from what a submissive experiences with her dominant. When a dominant inflicts pain it’s because the sub craves it. It’s like a runner’s high. The pain generates endorphins for those who like it.”

“I don’t like pain,” she whispered. “As I said a gentle slap or two is okay. But not this kind of pain.”

“Very well. That is a hard limit for you and I respect it. But let me explain one thing - and try to listen without labeling it. There are many ways of experiencing sex. We have already done role-playing more than once. Me, blindfolding and bonding you. You, wearing a French maid costume for me; and when you blindfolded me. What you call that?”

She searched his face for a clue, but found none. “Err... fulfilling our fantasies?”

“Aye, and that could be included in the category of light BDSM too. Although we didn’t plan or discuss it, or set safe-words or agreed on boundaries, many participants of kink would say that you have acted both as a submissive and as a dominatrix. With no pain involved.”

Sophia’s mouth fell open.

Alistair smiled at her reaction. “I ceded control to you when you blindfolded me. And you gave me control over you when you let me bind you.”

“But-but-”

“Have you looked at the links I sent you?”

“No,” she answered. “I should have, but...”

“Let’s do it together then. I should have told you what kind of role-play I enjoyed. We have lots of time to talk about this and we can negotiate our limits and boundaries. There are things I’d like to do, but if you don’t like them, I won’t even consider role-playing with you, because it will damage our trust in each other. It will damage our relationship and you in a harmful emotional way. And even if you agree to something and in the middle of a role-play decide that you don’t like it, I would immediately stop. Do you understand that, Sophia?” He searched her eyes as many emotions crossed her transparent face.

Not quite, but I can try. But let’s set some limits here.
“So, let me see if I got this right. No pain, no humiliation, no abuse. If I say no, it’s no. If I agree to something, I can ask you to stop if I change my mind.”

Hmm. That’s it, Sophia!
He nodded and controlled the naughty smile that threaten to split his lips.
You and I will do great scenes together.

“But let me make myself clear here, Alistair Connor, I’m no submissive. I don’t like that label and I don’t like to be ordered around. In fact,” a naughty smile appeared on her face, “I’ll probably be ordering
you
around.”

We’ll see.
He snorted but let her finish what she was saying.

“I can role-play, I can indulge in some previously agreed fantasies. It spices up the relationship. But that doesn’t mean that you can order me around.”

“Agreed. We’ll go through all those things together. I- I have to apologize for not being completely forthcoming with you from the beginning.” He locked his eyes on hers, for a full minute, hypnotizing her. “Let me make this right.”

Yes, please do.
She raised a questioning eyebrow, “How?”

“Marry me. Let me love you for the rest of my life.”

Yes!
“Y-” She stopped, uncertain.
Dammit, Sophia, say yes!

For a heartbeat, Alistair was sure she would accept. “We have a standoff, it seems.”

“A standoff?”

“Indeed. You keeping saying no. I’ll keep saying yes. I can be as stubborn as you are. I have no intention of changing my mind.”

And I will capitulate. I’m not strong enough to keep you at bay.
Sophia looked away.

Jaw clenched, Alistair walked to the dressing room and, an instant later, he was back behind Sophia. He caged her body inside his arms, bent his head and kissed her neck, nipping at her earlobe.

His movement caught her by surprise and she moaned incapable of holding back her pleasure.

“I love you, Sophia. Say yes,” he murmured in her ear, as his big warm hands squeezed her waist softly.
Say yes. Say yes.
He stepped closer, his warmth tantalizing.

She whirled in his arms. Sophia felt utterly conflicted. All she wanted to do was run away like a scared rabbit. But that was all she couldn’t do, as he held her under his spell.

She closed her eyes and parted her lips, inhaling a desperate mouthful of air. Before she could open her eyes, his lips took hers, commanding, demanding, ravaging her senses and his hand closed over her breast.

When he broke the kiss, the need to feel his mouth on hers again pulsed through every cell of her body and she leaned into him, consumed by the intensity of his gaze, unable to speak a single word.

All her reasons for saying no suddenly seemed so banal and incongruous.
Yes, Alistair Connor! Yes!

Time stopped and Alistair waited as she mused, analyzing her feelings.