True Connection (The Soul Mate Series) (3 page)

Dammit!

We never fight like this.

We
get
each other.

It’s got to be those damn giants.

I snatch up my pillow and press it to my face as I scream again.

In the past, when Henry thought someone was bad news or not good for me, he was right. I trust his judgment.

Not this time.

There’s just something inside of me that won’t give into Henry on this. I can’t let Seth go, for a reason I can’t name.

After a few songs, my door cracks open, and from the corner of my eye, I see Henry’s head float in. I toss my pillow back to the head of my bed.

“Can I come in?” he yells over the music.

Knowing that I can’t stay mad at him and I somehow have to get him to trust me where Seth is concerned, I nod to him and turn down my music so it’s just background noise. When I sit on my bed, I bring my knees up to hug them to my chest.

Henry sits on my desk chair and takes a deep breath before beginning. “Look, the guys remember when he moved here, three or so years ago. They said he was a scrawny little twerp. When school ended, they didn’t see him until the first day of school. It was like, in the two months of summer he grew to be the size of an eighteen year old.

“Jaz, that’s not normal, no matter how normal you think he is. It’s like he was a band geek before summer, and then after summer he was a star athlete.” He rakes his fingers through his hair and gives me a pleading look.

“You just described a growth spurt,” I point out.

“What he did, was more than a growth spurt, Jaz.” He glares at me. “He grew too much in too little time.” He grinds his teeth. “There’s something not right with him, and I’m going to figure it out.”

             
My eyes are wide. “Henry, you’re scaring me.”

             
“I’m sorry, Jaz. I didn’t tell you this to scare you.” He reaches out for me, and I brush him off lightly. “Just stay away from Seth. Let us take care of everything, okay?”

             
Every time he says to me, “stay away from Seth,” my heart clenches and I feel weird, like I’m panicking or coming undone. It’s completely irrational to feel that way. I’m not attached to him, I can’t be.

             
I sigh and shake my head. “You sound like some crazed stalker or something! So what if he’s strange?” I shrug. “He’s a nice guy, and he’s my friend. Maybe Seth needs a friend as badly as I do.” I begin to run out of steam and pause. “I’m not going to stop being friends with him just because you find him weird. Just like, you won’t stop bringing the giants around, because I find them annoying.”

             
Henry releases a sharp breath. “I get it, okay. I just get a weird vibe from him.” He groans when he sees the look of steel in my eyes. “I’m not letting it go, but I’ll try not to let it come between us. Just promise me one thing please?”

             
“What?”

             
“Don’t, well, just don’t. If you…” he sighs.

             
“Don’t swallow your tongue, out with it already!” I snap.

“Warn me before you start dating him, please?” He asks quietly.

I shake my head. “I don’t think that’s going to happen. He and I are just friends,” I shrug. On a whim I ask, “Think you could get the guys to back off, too? They’re making me crazy.”

             
When he shrugs, I flop onto my back and stare at the ceiling again while he softly closes my door.

He can be the best brother and friend sometimes, but other times, he can be an overprotective butt.

              A switch flips in my brain and I find myself wondering what exactly he meant by Seth’s change. Maybe I should check out a yearbook or the trophy case.

Actually, it doesn’t matter what he looks like now or what he looked like in the past.

I will stay friends with him.

Bad Day

             
Seth was absent on Monday, and Skeeter wasn’t acting herself being extra quiet and nervous. She seemed like she wanted to say something to me a few times but just couldn’t form the words, so it was a fairly boring day. But today is Tuesday, and I get to see my mom this afternoon, so today
has
to be a good day.

             
“So, Jaz,” Derik says, as he flops in the chair next to mine. “How are things goin’ for ya?”

             
I roll my eyes. “Just dandy Derik, what do you want?” It’s coming… I know it’s coming. Whatever he has to say will surely ruin my good day goal.

             
He smiles. “I was just wondering if you’d like to join me for lunch today.”

             
And there it is. He’s like a broken record.

There must be a sign on my back saying “This girl needs a good day! Bet you can’t ruin it for her!”

              “No,” I tell him and go back to working on my lake.

             
“I guess what they’re saying is true,” he says with a sigh. “You do like them older.”

I have no idea what he’s talking about, but I’m a little curious, so I shift in my seat to look at him.

              “Alright. I’ll bite. What are you talking about, Derik?”

             
“Ignore him, Jaz. He’s trying to get under your skin,” Skeeter warns.

             
Derik smiles, but the smile doesn’t bring out the warm and fuzzies. “No. That’s not true, Skeeter. Some of the guys have noticed who she chills with. There’s a line of guys waiting to have their turn, and I’m next, after she’s done with Seth.”

My breath whooshes out of my lungs as I process his innuendos. This is insane.

He’s
insane.

             
“You’re such a jagoff! If I was the type of girl you assume I am, you’d still be waiting on the sidelines.” I glare at him and fist my free hand.

             
“Touchy subject?” He grins. “We can talk about something else then. Say, you and me…” He stares into my eyes and does this weird thing with his fingers.

I ignore him completely and go back to my painting, finding a zone and am completely absorbed in what I’m doing until Skeeter breaks the spell by touching my arm.

              “Welcome back to Earth. It’s time to pack up,” she grins.

What? Oh right, time to go to gym.

              In gym, we’re playing volleyball, my sport, but I’m in my head too much to keep focus on the ball, my serve is off and I’m having a hard time with the set up for another girl to spike.

             
The
‘My Daughter Spiked Your Daughter’s Face Off’
bumper sticker on the back of the crushed Mazda flashes in my mind.

             
I grit my teeth and focus on the sting in my hand as I hit the ball, trying to escape the memories threatening to overtake my mind. The ball comes sailing my way again. I bend my knees and push off the floor. My hand connects with the ball and I smile at the familiar sting spreading across my palm. This is what I need, except for the images of my last game beginning to flow my mind.

It was the Championship game, and Dad, Mom, and Henry were decked out in our school colors. Mom was in charge of recording it for Sophie, and Dad was cheering louder than anyone. When we won, he was the first parent out on the court, hugging me, and shouting with my teammates and friends.

              My hit lands on the floor between two girls - who look at the ball like it’s diseased. The girls on my gym team laugh and give me high fives. I choke back the pain from the memory and try to laugh with them.

             
Coach Jaymes blows her whistle, and we all hustle to get dressed before the bell.

Thankfully, it’s just Henry and me for lunch today. I don’t think being around all the guys would be beneficial for my good day wish.

              We find a seat outside in the courtyard, and he gives me this look that says he isn’t going to let me try to enjoy my food in peace. Well, it’s what the school passes off as food. “Beautiful,” he starts, voice full of concern. “Skeeter found me before lunch. She told me, you and Derik had some words. So, spill it. What did the jagoff say today?”

             
“Oh, you know. He just wanted me to
do
lunch with him.” I smirk, and unwrap my fork.

             
“This again?” He rolls his eyes.

             
“Yeah, again.” My brows pinch together. “He seems to think that there’s a line of guys waiting for me, and he’s next. See what I get for hangin’ out with the giant triplets?”

             
His expression changes as his emotions flit across his face, confusion, comprehension, and disgust, before finally settling on fury. From the look in his eyes, I’d have to say I would
hate
to be Derik.

             
“I’ll be back.” He drops his burger onto the tray and cracks his knuckles.

I shouldn’t let him go. But I want to.
Dammit.

I place my hand on his arm to stop him. “You’ll have your chance at football to pound on him. Sit back and eat.”

              “That’s still gonna happen but right now I need to introduce his face to the floor.” His voice reminds me of Dad when he found out why Sophie’s one boyfriend dumped her. Protective anger.

I bite down on my tongue, hard, to keep the memories back and keep me in the present. I have to stop Henry from getting expelled.

              “Not on school grounds. He’s not worth the suspension,” I remind him.

             
“Fine.” He flashes me a huge, creepy grin. “But I’m telling the guys to make sure we end up at the same party he goes to this weekend.”

             
“Whatever you’re thinking, I do not want to know.” I giggle.

             
He chuckles a bit. “Hey, before I forget, I wanna stop at the house before we head to Leland’s. I wanna grab some of Dad’s books.”

             
“Okay.” I shrug.

We finish our lunch and head back inside. Math is boring as usual, but at least Seth is here today. I hope he’s feeling better; he doesn’t look quite right to me though, like he’s in a bad mood. After class, I try talking to him.

              I turn around in my seat. “Hey, Seth. How ya feelin’?”

             
“I’m good.” He doesn’t look up from the worksheet the teacher passed out at the beginning of class. He didn’t even write his name on it.

             
“I don’t think those problems will solve themselves. Are you sure you’re okay?”

             
“I said I’m good, Jasmine. Drop it,” he snaps and stands with his bag in his hand. He looks like he’s in pain as he walks away from me, or maybe that’s what I wanted to see.

             
But I just watch him go, I don’t press further, or try to stop him.

             
“I don’t want to take sides,” Skeeter says. My eyes snap to hers. Take sides? “He just wanted to get to know you.”

             
“Skeeter, he still can,” I say to her.

             
“You don’t let him,” she shrugs.

             
“Come on, Skeeter. It’s hopeless,” Seth calls over as she was about to say something else. She offers me a sad smile before walking over to Seth.

Stupidly, I stare after the both of them, wondering what just happened and why I want to cry.

              I walk to study hall, alone, and think about what just happened. I’m not ready to open up. But still, it’s actually painful to think about not being able to talk to Seth, or Skeeter, for that matter.

This is crazy - how is it possible to be attached to someone after a week?!

              In study hall, I ignore the empty seat next to Seth and take a seat on the opposite side of the room in the back. I pull out my iPod, pop in my ear buds, and try to focus on my English assignment. The tune that starts means I must’ve accidentally hit the “shuffle all” button when I pulled it out of my bag. It’s an old song, Copperhead Road by Steve Earle.

Dad’s favorite song.

Dad and Henry used to shout the lyrics whenever it would come on.

             
I feel a hand on my cheek, accompanied by a tingling sensation. My eyes pop open and I look up into the warmest green eyes I’ve ever seen.

Seth.

I wipe the tears from my cheek, turn off my iPod and drop it in my bag.

             
“I’m sorry Jaz. I’m just having a bad day,” he whispers.

             
“You’re not the only one who has bad days,” I snap, grab my bag and stand.

             
“Where are you going?”

             
“Trying not to make your day any worse,” I say, with pain and sadness thick in my throat.

I tell the teacher that my brother and I need to leave early. Happily, she writes me a pass without questions.
It wouldn’t surprise me if Leland informed the school that we were visiting my mother and might leave early.

             
I grab Henry from his class, and in the empty hallway, I hear those strange footsteps and feel eyes on my back. I stiffen and begin to walk a little faster.

             
“You okay Jaz?” he frowns.

“Yea, I’m f-fine.” I’m so not fine. “Do you hear footsteps?”

              His frown deepens. “No. Why?”

“Don’t worry about it,” I sigh. I guess I’m being paranoid.
“It’s nothing.”

***

We get to Lupiterra Hospital and go to the mental health wing, where Mom’s room is.

Three months ago, I never would’ve believed I’d be coming here once a week for as long as it takes, to visit my
mom
. Mom admitted herself, with encouragement from Leland. This is our third visit, and I hope we see the changes that Leland says he sees in her.

The nurse smiles to us before we enter her room. I hope that means we’ll find her somewhat happy to see us.

Henry opens the door, and we see her sitting in the chair with a steady stream of tears running down her face. I run over, wipe her face, and wrap my arms around her. Henry comes over and hugs her from the other side.

I still don’t know what to do for her. Everyone grieves differently.

The remains of my family confirm that statement.

Mom wouldn’t leave the house, actually, wouldn’t leave the couch. She wasn’t eating, bathing, or anything, which is why she’s now in the hospital.

I shut myself off from everyone. At one point, I wouldn’t even talk to Henry. People say to lean on your friends and family during hard times. I disagree. Every day it was, “Jazzy, I’m so sorry for your loss. Anything I can do?” or “How are you feeling today?” in that I-feel-sorry-for-you voice. Or “Jazzy, when my friend or family member passed away I …” and try giving me some advice, or share their coping method. I get it. My life is tragic. I have enough reminders every day. I don’t need it pointed out all the time.

Leland hit the ice harder and works out more often.

And Henry, well, he’s probably the most normal. He cried, and he visits their graves frequently.

Every day is a new challenge of coping with the reminders, the memories, and the changes, but I’m trying to be okay, for my family.

              It breaks my heart even more to see Mom like this every time we come. I feel tears prick in my eyes and I bite my cheek to keep from crying. I have to hold it together and stay strong for Mom.

             
After a bit, I feel her shift. She wraps an arm around each of us, which is better than the last time we saw her - she didn’t look at us and only responded to yes or no questions.

She takes the tissue from me and blows her nose.

              “You guys are so…good to me,” she chokes out. She takes a deep breath and looks at us again. “How’s the new school?”

             
“Great,” Henry says, at the same time I say, “It’s school.”

I’d rather not talk about school. In fact, I’d rather just forget today even happened.

              “Come on guys, give me somethin’. Henry, are you makin’ friends okay? Jazzy, Le said you’re takin’ another art class?”

Henry looks uncomfortable at the mention of art class. But if he knows what’s good for him, he won’t bring up Derik. Mom doesn’t need to worry about some idiot at school.

She looks at me expectantly, and I stop myself from rolling my eyes.

“I’m painting the lake at Leland’s.” I smile, and she tries to return it. Another step forward.