Treading Water (14 page)

“
I know we don’t have to,
but I really, really
want
to make love with you. Give me another
chance?”

She ran her fingers through his hair and
kissed him, a gentle undemanding kiss. Finally, she sat up, took
his hand, and led him inside. “Which one’s yours?” she asked of the
two closed doors.

He pointed to the one on the left.

In the small cabin, they lay down together
on the bed. Their lips met in another soft kiss.

Without breaking the kiss, Andi stretched
out on top of him.

His hands coasted over her back, making her
tremble with desire.

She slid down, dragging her lips along his
chest and belly.

He sighed and tangled his fingers in her
hair.

When she took him into her
mouth, he gasped. “
Andi
…”

With her hand, lips, and
tongue, she loved him until he was panting and sweating. Then she
moved over him, and without giving him time to think or prepare,
she sank down onto his hard length. With her hands resting on his
chest, she let her head fall back in surrender. The feeling of
completion overwhelmed her.
Here
was what she’d always wanted—right here, right
now, this man, this love. For a long moment, she didn’t move, she
just held still and reveled in the intense pleasure of having him
deep inside her.

He laced his fingers through hers.

She raised their joined hands and brought
them down on either side of his head as she lifted and lowered her
hips in small, delicate movements. Sliding her lips over his, she
gazed down at him. His eyes were closed, and she watched the
tension drain from his face.

“
It’s okay, Jack,” she
whispered. “I love you.”

His eyes flew open to meet her gaze. He
squeezed her hands and let himself go.

Chapter 10

They lay facing each other, listening to the
symphony of crickets on the nearby shore and the soft music. He
twirled one of her curls around his finger as he whispered along
with Sinatra singing “The Way You Look Tonight.”

She closed her eyes to
hold back tears that threatened to ruin the loveliest moment of her
life. He was everything—
everything
she had ever wanted and so much more.

“
Are you sad,
Andi?”

“
How could I be? It was so…
I’ve never…”

He leaned over to quiet her with a kiss. “I
know.”

She ran her fingers up and down his back,
wanting to savor every minute with him.

“
I’m starving,” he said,
his voice muffled against her breasts.

She laughed and hugged him for another
minute before she let him go.

He pulled on a pair of shorts he unearthed
from a drawer below the bed. “Don’t move.”

They stayed in bed and devoured the dinner
he’d brought. He fed her crackers loaded with brie and thin slices
of prosciutto ham.

“
Mmmm,” she said. “That’s
heavenly.”

The CD player flipped to the next disk, and
Andi giggled when Sammy Davis Jr.’s “Candy Man” came on. “I’m
sensing a theme.”

“
Jamie loves all things Rat
Pack. He’s even got a stash of Cuban cigars around here somewhere.
Want one for dessert?”

“
I think I’ll pass.” She
leaned over to kiss him and refilled the wineglass they were
sharing. Taking another handful of grapes, she fed him several and
kissed the juice off his lips. “Speaking of Jamie, I meant to ask,
how’re things with him and Frannie?”

“
Apparently, he’s planning
to propose.”

“
Wow, how do you feel about
that?”

“
I’m thrilled. I love them
both, and it’s funny how what would’ve seemed crazy a couple of
weeks ago suddenly makes perfect sense.”

“
I know what you mean,” she
said with a coy smile.

He grinned. “I guess you do, don’t you?”

“
The girls will be excited
about Frannie and Jamie getting married, won’t they?”

“
For sure, but you know who
would’ve really loved it?”

“
Clare.”

He looked up at the ceiling. “She was always
fixing them up with friends of hers, trying to get them settled.
She would’ve found this very ironic, to say the least.”

Andi rested her head on his shoulder. “I’m
glad it’s worked out for them. It’s such a sweet story, how it’s
taken them decades to find something that was always there.”

“
It’s amazing.”

She reached up to play with his hair.
“What’re you thinking?”

“
It’s important that you
know I was never unfaithful to Clare. I never even thought about
it.”

Caressing his face, she said, “You’ve been
so faithful to her, Jack.”

“
Everyone’s been urging me
to get back to living, and I thought I was doing that by
reconnecting with the girls and going back to work.” He ran his
fingers through her silky curls. “But it took meeting you to make
me feel truly alive again.”

“
You’ve been through an
awful thing, but it hasn’t destroyed you.”

“
I never would’ve gone
looking for this, even though I’m so glad I found you.” He kissed
her softly. “But I worry I’m dragging you into a no-win
situation.”

“
I’ve stepped into your
life with my eyes wide open. We’ve asked nothing more from each
other than what we have right now. You’ve got so many things to
worry about. Don’t add me to the list.”

“
Thank you for what you
did…before. Somehow you knew just what I needed. I don’t think I
could’ve done this with anyone but you.”

She hugged him close to her.

He trailed kisses up her neck. “Had it been
a long time for you, too?”

“
Since Alec.”

“
Then why are you still on
the pill, or is that none of my business?”

“
To keep my periods
regular. I get all out of whack without it.”

“
Mmm,” he said, “we can’t
have that. You taste so good, like wine and…” Taking another taste,
he added, “Sweetness. I could very easily get addicted to you.” He
flicked his tongue in a teasing stroke over her lips before
traveling to her neck and breasts.

The feel of her fingers combing through his
hair seemed to fuel his desire as he pressed his lips to her belly.
Parting her legs with his shoulders, he trailed a finger through
her dampness.

“
Jack,” she whispered,
arching her back.

He dipped his head and added his tongue.

She cried out.

Dropping soft, openmouthed kisses on her
inner thigh, he kissed his way to her core and took her right
over.

“
Oh, God,” she said,
gasping for air and looking up at him with wide eyes.

He kissed his way to her mouth. “I love
you,” he whispered as he entered her. “I love you so much.”

She brushed the hair back from his forehead
and kissed him. “I love you, too.”

Jack awoke next to Andi on Monday morning
after a desperate last night of lovemaking.

He experienced a horrible, sinking sensation
every time he imagined going back to the lonely existence he’d led
before she swooped in and changed everything. She’d helped him see
that, despite how it seemed, his life wasn’t over. Altered? Yes.
But over? No.

The weekend had been one of the best of his
life. They’d sailed and fished and gone swimming and exhausted
themselves making love into the wee hours of each morning. But with
her departure time creeping closer, Jack had sensed her withdrawal,
as if she was preparing herself to leave him. Her quiet
introspection had begun to worry him as the sun rose on their final
morning together.

He hugged her tight against him, and she
stirred.

She pushed her hair back and turned to face
him. “Are you all right? What is it?”

He stroked her cheek. “No, I’m not all
right. I don’t want you to go.”

“
I have to go. You know
that.”

“
What happens now?” he
asked.

She studied him for a long time. “I don’t
know,” she finally said. “Maybe we go about our lives with a lovely
memory of a once-in-a-lifetime weekend.”

His stomach dropped. “You can’t be serious.
You expect me to pretend this never happened?”

“
We have to be realistic,
Jack.” As she said the words, her lips quivered and her eyes
filled. “We live more than a thousand miles apart. We have
established lives and children who can’t be uprooted. How can we
put ourselves through a long-distance relationship that can’t go
anywhere? It’ll just get more difficult every time we see each
other.”

“
Isn’t an occasional
weekend or vacation better than nothing?”

“
You can’t do that to your
girls, Jack. How will you ever explain me to them?”

Frustrated and panic-stricken, he stared at
her. “If you felt this way, why did you come this weekend?”

“
I almost didn’t, but I
needed to see you. I needed to know—”

He sat up and moved away from her. “What?
What did you need to know? That you’re walking away from what could
be the love of your life?”

A sob hiccupped through her. “I have no
doubt that’s exactly what I’m doing. I’m so sorry, Jack. I wish
things could be different, but I feel like my heart is being ripped
out of my chest after one weekend with you. How can I keep putting
myself through this when I know we can never really be
together?”

Jack rubbed his eyes as despair crept back
in. He hadn’t missed that feeling this weekend. “There has to be a
way. I can’t lose you now that I’ve found you—now that we’ve found
each other. I love you, Andi. I’ve loved only one other woman in my
life, and I knew it just as quickly then as I do now. This is right
between us. I can’t tell you how I know. I just do.”

“
I love you, too.” Her
voice caught with emotion as she cradled his face in her hands and
turned him to her. “I love you so much. I’d like nothing more than
to have the rest of my life to show you just how much. I’ve never
admired anyone more than I do you, the way you’ve survived in spite
of everything. I wish things were different, that we’d met at a
different time in our lives.”

He held her close enough to drink in the
scent that was so uniquely hers, knowing she was right. But he
couldn’t imagine going back to the bleakness he’d been living with
before. When everything in his world turned to black and white,
she’d brought back the color.

“
I’m not sorry,” she
whispered. “I wouldn’t have missed this for the world.”

“
Me either.” He kissed her
gently at first and then with more passion as her enthusiastic
response fed his desire. Knowing they were short on time, he
entered her with a quick thrust of his hips and then gave her a
moment to adjust. He gazed down at the lovely face that would haunt
him forever.

She reached for him and fused her mouth to
his.

“
How can we let go of
this?” he asked, filling her and then withdrawing, leaving her
bereft.

When he went deep again, she wrapped her
legs around him to keep him there and rocked against him.

The end, when it came, was more powerful and
consuming than any other time.

“
How am I supposed to let
you go?”

“
Please, Jack,” she
whispered. “Please.”

He shifted off her but kept his eyes fixed
on her when she got up to take a shower.

Two hours later, they drove over the bridge
on the way out of town, and Andi took a last look back at the
harbor.

When they reached the airport, Jack parked
to walk her in. At security, he took her hands. “Thank you,” he
said, his voice heavy with emotion.

Her long lashes sparkled with tears. “I had
the best time, Jack. I’ll never forget it—or you.”

He hugged her and whispered, “This is not
the end, Andi. It’s not over.”

They held each other for a long time before
she backed away. “Bye.”

He said nothing as he watched her go.

Those who knew Jack best agreed that the
recent healing they’d witnessed had suffered a serious setback in
the aftermath of Andi’s departure.

“
I’m so worried about him,”
Frannie said to Jamie late one night when they were in his bed.
“It’s almost worse this time because he had a second chance at
happiness, and now that’s gone, too. He looks devastated
again.”

“
He’s been trying to hide
it, but he’s a mess. Do you think he’s in love with
her?”

“
I’m sure of
it.”

“
Maybe he could convince
her to move here.”

“
She won’t do that. He told
me she has a hearing-impaired son, and she won’t want to move him
away from his school. She’s got a great job and a life in Chicago.
Besides, it’s not like he can marry her.”

“
It’s not fair. He’s
already been through enough.” Jamie kissed her hand and then her
lips. “It makes me appreciate how very lucky we are.”

“
I still want to pinch
myself sometimes to make sure I’m not dreaming.”

“
I guarantee you’re not
dreaming. As a matter of fact, stay right there and don’t look.” He
jumped up, left the room, and came back a minute later holding
something behind his back. “I was waiting for the right moment, and
it just occurred to me that this is it.”

She gasped when he knelt beside the bed and
reached for her hand.