Traplines (15 page)

Great. Tom, the traveling freak show, he thought as she waited for him to take off his shoes before she let him into the kitchen. Mike sat at the table, pretending to gag as she exclaimed over his matching socks.

Mike’s uncle Evan came in the kitchen looking distracted. He stopped when he saw Tom. “Hoo-yah!” he said, and Tom wished more than ever that he’d gone home.

Mike kicked the kitchen table.

With Patricia and Evan there, it was hard to ask Mike what
the fuck was the matter with him, so instead he said, “Didn’t see you at lunch today.”

Mike’s eyes wandered around the room, looking at everything except Tom.

Patricia and Evan exchanged glances, then excused themselves. Mike walked over to the refrigerator. “You want some pizza?”

Tom shrugged. “Sure.”

“It’s vegetarian.”

“That’s okay.”

“It’s shitty.”

Tom took a deep breath. “Can I crash here tonight?”

Mike pulled the pizza out of the refrigerator and put it in the microwave. “I dunno.”

For a long time the only sound was the hum of the microwave. Tom got up and walked out of the kitchen. As he left, the microwave beeped. No one was in the living room. He was glad. He put his shoes back on. When he was halfway down the driveway, Patricia yelled, “Aren’t you staying for dinner?”

He shook his head and waved good-bye. She raised her hand, waved once, then closed the door.

He ended up in the park, sitting on the swings, dragging his feet in the sand. The sky was clear as the sun set. The streetlights flickered on.

Mike had brought him to a hostel once. It cost nine bucks a night. The mattress was thin and the blankets were ratty-looking. The walls were covered with graffiti. He picked at his suit. He was probably overdressed.

So. Mike, who’d never been bothered by his seizures or his grunge look or his mooching, freaked because he looked like a suit.

And Paulina liked Jeremy.

He could understand it. Hell, who was he kidding? He’d never had a chance with Paulina. At least Jeremy hadn’t rubbed it in, hadn’t said, Hey, guess who I’m seeing tonight?

He didn’t want to deal with Jeremy, who had become so crazed about Tom’s taking his medicine that he watched him down every pill.

It got cold and he went home. The lights in the apartment were on. He stopped, not wanting to go up. He was taking out his keys when he heard Mike say, “Where the fuck you been?”

Tom had thought he was beyond being surprised. “Hey.”

“Hey yourself,” Mike said.

“Patricia know where you are?”

Mike grinned, ducking his head. “We had a discussion.”

“Yeah? You break any windows this time?”

“Nah. Just a couple of dishes. It safe to go up?”

To the apartment, he meant. Tom didn’t know how to answer that one.

“You want to talk about it?” Mike said.

Tom shook his head. “No.”

Mike looked suddenly relieved. “Good.”

They went to a party but it was a bust. The host was drunk enough to think he was a good guitar player. He knew about three chords and mixed them up. Everyone had escaped to the kitchen except for three or four people passed out on the living room floor.

“Oooooh,” the man sang. “There’s …” He struck an unidentifiable chord. “A Baa …” Chord. “Baaad …”

Mike, fingers in his ears, got up and left the room.

Tom spaced out on the couch for a while before Mike came back and got him up.

They goofed around outside for a while after that. Someone had left a Nerf hockey set on the sidewalk, probably little kids because the shoulderpads were tiny. The helmets didn’t fit the two of them, but they tied them on anyway and played. They clutched their sides and feigned violent death when the Nerfball hit them.

Back at Mike’s place, Tom fell asleep on the rock-hard futon while Mike played video games, quietly swearing at the TV screen.

Thursday morning started with Evan stomping downstairs, dragging Mike off the floor by his ear and screaming at him for leaving the house when he was grounded. They ate breakfast in sullen silence. Patricia drove them to school, her eyes straight ahead. The only sounds were the car and the syrupy cheerfulness of Patricia’s favorite soft-rock station.

“Tom,” Patricia said when she stopped the car. “I’d appreciate it if you stayed away from our house for a while. Mike’s not going to have any visitors for a few weeks.”

Tom got out of the car without answering. Patricia grabbed Mike’s sleeve. “Don’t plan on going anywhere for a long time, because you are so grounded—”

Mike jerked away, then slammed the door on the rest of what she was saying. She glared for a moment but took off.

Mike rolled his eyes.

“Later,” Tom said to Mike.

He made it to all his classes except band. The idea of seeing Paulina made him cringe.

When he got home Tom couldn’t find his medicine. He opened the bathroom cabinet and the bottle was gone. He tried to remember if he’d moved it. He searched his room, thinking maybe he’d just put it down somewhere and forgotten. He ransacked the kitchen, opened the fridge, opened every cabinet.

Jeremy wouldn’t do that, he thought. Jeremy fucking pushes them down my throat. He wouldn’t hide them.

After going through the living room and bedroom one more time, he knew. Goddamn him.

He could go one, maybe two days without it. Then all that would happen was a few seizures. Nothing drastic. He could go get the prescription refilled. Say he dumped them down the sink by accident.

Tom stopped pacing. He went back to his bedroom, pulled out Jeremy’s suitcase, and opened it. The coke was still there. He weighed it in his hand and smiled.

Two can play that game.

Jeremy was waiting for him in the living room when he got home from school the next day. They looked at each other for a long time, neither saying anything.

“Hello, stranger,” Jeremy finally said.

“Jeremy,” Tom said.

“Come on in. Have a seat.”

“You have something that belongs to me,” Tom said.

Jeremy held up the bottle. “I was looking for you the other night. Remember our deal. You’re supposed to tell me when you’re staying out.”

“Yeah?” Tom said.

“Yeah,” Jeremy said. “I was worried. Thought maybe Richard got to you.”

“So you hid my medicine.”

He tilted his head. “Seemed like a good idea at the time. I think you have something of mine too.”

Tom tensed. “I do.”

Jeremy nodded, still grinning. “Didn’t think you had it in you.”

“I want my medicine back.”

Jeremy flipped the bottle to him. Tom caught it. He expected Jeremy to dive across the coffee table or something. “And I want you to stop treating me like I’m six years old.”

“You are treated the way you act,” Jeremy said smugly.

“Then you should be locked up in a loony bin.”

“Where’s my coke?”

Tom hesitated. “I taped it to the bottom of your car.”

Jeremy whooped. Tom hadn’t expected him to be amused. He had been dreading this moment but Jeremy only laughed.

Just when Tom thought it was going to be okay, Jeremy lunged and Tom scrambled back, thinking that his cousin was going to punch him. But Jeremy plugged his nose with one hand and covered his mouth with the other, leaning into him so that Tom fell back onto the couch. As suddenly as he’d attacked, Jeremy let go, laughing as if it was all in good fun.

“Don’t ever do anything like that again.” Jeremy slapped him lightly.

He stood, brushed himself off. “Now,” he said cheerfully, “better get your homework done before we see your lady doc.”

Jeremy drove him to the hospital, sat outside in the waiting room, chatted with Dr. Ahava, then drove Tom home.

“You can go out,” he told Tom, just before he took off. “But you’d better be back for dinner or you’re dead meat.”

Tom stood on the corner watching Jeremy’s car squeal down the street. Just my luck. The only person who really gives a shit if I live or die is a whacked-out drug addict who likes playing God.

“Tommy!” his mom said, when he came in. She threw her arms around him, then brought him into the living room. He sucked in a breath, forced it out.

“Isn’t it gorgeous!” she said. “I couldn’t
believe
it when the delivery men came! I thought they were at the wrong door. Oh, Tom, isn’t it just marvelous?”

His heart beat too fast as he stared at the large-screen TV and the surround-sound system on the brand-new entertainment center. He couldn’t even guess how much it had all cost. He wanted to trust Jeremy. He wanted to believe in him. But somehow, some way, Jeremy was going to make them pay for it.

“Mom,” he said.

She turned to him, and he knew what he had to do. Her smile faded. She was happy and he was going to make her unhappy.

He pulled the suitcase out from under Jeremy’s bed. He opened the lid and picked up the black garbage bag filled with coke. Her eyes went dead and blank.

She said she hadn’t really believed their luck either.

Once she made up her mind she moved fast. She collected Jeremy’s things and set them in the hallway. She even packed up the entertainment center.

“You’ve got to give the clothes back,” she said.

“Can I keep some?”

“No,” she said, her face cold.

He shifted uncomfortably.

“It’s blood money, honey,” she said. “Only bad can come from it.”

“But he took my clothes. I’ll give them back when I—”

She stopped packing. “He what?”

“He’s got my clothes. You think I’m wearing this by choice?” Tom gestured at his suit jacket. He smiled. “This practically screams ‘Mug me.’ ”

When she didn’t laugh, he said, “I’ll give them back.”

“Why didn’t you tell me?” she said flatly.

He didn’t know what to say. Her lip began to quiver the way it did before she cried.

“I want you to go over to Mike’s,” she said.

Tom was shocked. She hated Mike. “Why?”

“This is between me and him. I don’t want you here.”

“But—”

“Tommy,” she said, putting her hands to her temples. “Don’t argue with me. Please.” Not looking at him, she asked, “Was it really Richard?”

“What?” he said.

“Or was it Jeremy?”

“I don’t understand.”

“If you’re protecting him, you don’t have to. I know he has a temper. I know he’s family, but if he’s hitting you, you can tell me.”

He considered lying. No. He didn’t need to. “He’s not.”

She sighed, long and slow. “He told me it was an inheritance,” she said. “Can you believe it? I did.”

The mood at Mike’s was grim. Mike had locked himself in his bedroom and wouldn’t come out. He was playing his stereo loud. Nirvana rang through the house. His aunt and uncle looked disgusted. Tom stayed for a while, then said good-bye, glad to be out of there.

He waited a few hours in the park before he went home. When he opened the door, the first thing he noticed was that all Jeremy’s things were missing from the hallway. He put his bike into the closet. The foldaway bed was back in its corner. He walked down the hallway. His bedroom looked empty, bigger without Jeremy’s things taking up space.

His mom was standing by the window. She came up to him and put an arm around his waist.

“Well,” she said. “That’s that.”

“I’m surprised you let him stay in the first place.”

“He’s family, Tommy.”

“Aunt Rhoda told me why he got kicked out of military school.” He hated lying to her, but it was the only way he was ever going to find out what had happened.

She took her arm away. “He didn’t mean to go that far. It was self-defense.”

Tom forced himself to keep his expression neutral. “Not the way Aunt Rhoda tells it.”

“Hmph,” she said. “That old bat never liked Jeremy. Don’t listen to a word she says. They would never have acquitted him if he’d been guilty. He was such a sweet boy. Always so helpful. A little gentleman.” She brought his hands to her cheek and started to cry. Tom saw that she was getting really upset. She didn’t look like she could take much more.

Her symptoms started as the week wore on. By Friday, he knew she’d been dry as long as she could. She fidgeted. She scrubbed a part of the kitchen floor, stopped, and then started to reorganize the kitchen. She sat down, her foot tapping rapidly. She wanted to leave but needed an excuse. He couldn’t do anything right when she got to this stage. He disappeared into the bedroom and sat on his bed, his homework spread around him.

She stopped in at his bedroom and leaned on the door frame. “He gave his keys back. You don’t have to worry.”

“Yeah,” he said.

“I’ll see you in a while.”

“Night,” he said.

She lingered for a moment. “Take care.”

He listened for the sound of the front door closing. Perversely, he found he missed Jeremy now that he was gone. I did the right thing, he told himself.

But he doubted it now, when it was dark and the apartment was empty.

She didn’t come back that night. He considered going downtown but he hated cruising the skid bars, and even if he found her it would just embarrass them both. The best thing to do was leave her alone. He had a sudden flash that she probably felt smothered by him, the way he had with Jeremy. Her life, he thought. Don’t bug her.

He moved into the living room and watched TV. As he was drifting off to sleep, he realized that the band was in Bellingham this weekend. After all that, Jeremy hadn’t loaned him the money to go on the trip. He yawned. He wondered if Jeremy had paid the phone bill. Didn’t seem likely. The weatherman said it was going to rain tonight and tomorrow until the afternoon. He hoped she had an umbrella. He kept his eyes open until they burned and the TV blurred. Canned laughter from an old sitcom filled the living room.

The lounger squeaked. Tom woke slowly, sensing someone else in the living room, thinking, She’s back.

He turned his head, slitting his eyes open.

“Hiya kid,” Jeremy said.

Tom, instantly awake, fumbled to sit up.

“Take it easy,” Jeremy said. “Just dropping your stuff off.”

Tom saw the five garbage bags around the sofa. He slumped back. His cousin had brought him his clothes. He
hadn’t thought he would. He felt a reflex guilt, then a flutter of panic. Jeremy was here. He wasn’t supposed to be. “Jeez.”