Transmission Lost (78 page)

Jack snorted with laughter. “Yeah...Yeah, I'm used to it by now. They're just looking for the dramatic angle. Hopefully that was the last interview I have to do for a while.”

“That's not
really
the title of your book, is it?”

He looked up at the ceiling with a sigh. “The publisher thought it had a better ring to it than the title I wanted. I was going to call it
Final Flight
, or something less...I dunno...less cheesy. But the publisher thought that title didn't has as much punch.” He chuckled. “I didn't even really write it for anyone in particular. Just...something I felt like writing, I guess. I needed to tell my story.”

“Can't wait to read it,” Brooke said. She looked over at him. “You don't talk a lot about the stuff that happened back then. Stuff I wasn't around for, anyway.”

“Yeah. Some of it's pretty painful to think about.” Jack took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “Bad memories...Good memories that make me feel bad...” He slumped a little and closed his eyes. “It's a lot to keep inside. I guess that's why I wrote the book. Easier than talking about it.”

The two of them were quiet for a while, and the only sounds in the living room were the noises from the television. The news had just ended, and now there was some special-interest show going on about some crazy fad diet that a celebrity was promoting. Something about Ailian tea being the secret to longevity. Jack wasn't really paying attention to it. He was lost in thought. Talking about the book had dredged up a lot of memories, and a lot of thoughts about the ceremony he was supposed to be attending on Earth. He wasn't sure he really wanted to go. He knew what to expect: a bunch of politicians, ambassadors, military officers, and celebrities talking about how this was a turning point for the whole of populated space. There would be representatives from every major world in the colonized galaxies, from each of the three newly-allied species. As much as Jack agreed with and was enthusiastic about the need for such showings of cooperation and friendship, he just didn't want to have to face it. Seeing Ailians in person again would make him think about Aria.

Jack thought about the last time he had seen her. He remembered it like it had been only a few days ago. He'd never forget the frenzied terror of escaping the royal palace on Lirna with Brooke, and then seeing Aria being brought out on a stretcher, her dye-blackened fur matted and stained with blood. She had looked near to death. They had shared a few words, one last kiss, and then she had made him leave. Neither of them had wanted it, but both of them had known it was to keep him safe. As long as the rebellion was going on, she would be a target for retribution because she killed the rebel leader, her own mother. As long as Jack was with her, that would make him a target as well, and an easier one to get to. Jack would have been in constant danger, and Aria would have been in constant danger from trying to protect him. Returning as deep into human space as Cerelis put him far enough away from the rebellion that his safety was as good as guaranteed, and one less thing for Aria to fret over. But that didn't make the pain and worry of being separated from her any better. He hoped that she had made it through the war alright and was still alive, but...the fact that he hadn't heard even a whisper from her made him fearful, and angry, and about a million other emotions that all collided to make him feel absolutely miserable.

“Why are you so quiet, daddy?”

Jack gave a start and opened his eyes again, turning his head to the side to see Brooke watching him. His daughter looked concerned, something that he had seen in her face too many times over the last five years. He often went into quiet moods like that. Never anything sour or brooding, just melancholic, but it was certainly understandable that she'd be worried about him.

“Just...thinking,” Jack said. “I'm okay, it's just...”

“You're thinking about her again.” This was a statement, not a question. Brooke knew very well how close he and Aria had been, and had known for some time, now. When she and Jack had first met, he had described Aria just as a good friend, but of course when the deceased Empress, Kri'a Solan IV, had used his and Aria's relationship as a tool to help rally support for an alliance with humanity, very few people on Lirna and in many other places in the Ascendancy had not heard of them. Brooke, as a general rule, was not very fond of Ailians, owing to her life as a slave, but she had liked both Empress Solan and her successor, Li'ren Amani. She was sympathetic on some level to how her father felt.

“Yeah...,” Jack admitted. He sat up on the couch, leaning forward with his hands clasped over his knees. “I probably seem like a moron for dwelling on it so much. Five years have gone by. I haven't heard from her at all.”

Brooke scooted over a little and put a hand on her father's knee. “You're not a moron,” she assured him. “I think about my parents every day. I only have fuzzy memories, but it's still there. And I haven't seen them in fifteen years or more.” She squeezed his knee. “I'm sure you'll...get to see her again, someday.”

“Sometimes I'm not so sure,” Jack muttered. “I feel like I would have heard from her by now. I get dark thoughts, sometimes. Maybe she just forgot about me. We didn't know each other that long, after all...She could have moved on, found someone else...Or hell, maybe she's dead, like the reporter said.”

“You don't really believe that,” Brooke said immediately. She put an arm around his shoulders. “You don't believe it for a minute.”

Jack was quiet again for a few seconds, then finally he gave a weak smile. “No...Not really...But still.” He chuckled a little. “But it's easier for me to think that. How fucked up is that? That it's easier for me to believe she's dead than to believe anything else?”

“Pretty fucked up,” Brooke said, smiling as well. The smile went away quickly as she hugged him. “It just means you still love her a lot, that's all. It's just your head trying to get some closure for you. It doesn't make you a moron, or a bad person, or anything bad at all. It just makes you a regular person who doesn't know anything for sure.”

He hugged his daughter. “You're a pretty smart lady, kiddo,” he said. “Guess I got at least one thing in my life going right for me. I couldn't have found a better daughter if I'd made one myself.”

Brooke let go of him and sat back. “What are you going to do next? After you go to that ceremony, anyway. What's the next step?”

Jack leaned back again, stroking his chin as he stared up at the ceiling once more. “I think I want to go back to Lirna,” he decided. “I want to know for sure. There was no way I could go back while the war was still going on. Now that it's coming to an end, travel will probably start back up again. We'll be allies, so it shouldn't be too hard for a human to go to the Ascendancy. Especially since some of the former slaves never came back, stayed citizens there. I want to go back to Aria's family home. Find her, or find out what happened to her. Maybe things won't be like they were before, but at least I'll know.” He smiled. “It would be nice to at least see some of her family again.”

His daughter nodded. “I think you should do that. I...I don't know if I'd want to go with you, but...maybe.” She looked at the floor. Jack didn't blame her. He knew that the vast majority of her memories of life in the Ascendancy were terrible ones. It had only been during the last few months of her life as a slave that she had found some measure of good treatment in the service of the royal family. She had already said, when Jack had first gotten the invitation to the ceremony on Earth, that she had no intention of going. Earth was no home to her.

Jack got up from the couch. “How about some dinner?” he asked her. “My cooking is getting better. I thought I'd try my hand at spaghetti tonight. Sound good to you?”

Brooke brightened up. “As long as you don't set the noodles on fire like you did last time. The kitchen still smells like smoke...”

“I'll do my best,” Jack promised, laughing as he walked towards the kitchen.

******

Looking out of the window of the shuttle was enough to make Jack feel some kind of happiness again. The journey from Cerelis to Earth had taken nearly two days, and that whole time he had been poring over updated records of what Earth looked like now. He had seen pictures from the war, sent back by human and Ailian intelligence sources, and none of it had looked very good. Cities in flames, buildings ruined, and countryside burned by the ravages of battle. To his surprise, when he arrived, he found that it was not all desolation and destruction as he had been expecting. Some of the major civilian areas still looked the same as they had when he'd left. Not all of them, though. Large swathes of Europe, Africa, and North America, where the majority of military centers had been located, had been virtually wiped off the map. But other parts still remained. Asia had been largely untouched, since those countries had been mostly civilian and industrial, and the rebels had taken care to preserve those valuable resources as much as they could. South America was in the same situation, and Australia was fine as well. Melbourne was his destination, and was the location of the ceremony that was to be held.

His shuttle was packed with dignitaries and other prominent civilians from Cerelis and several other important human worlds. Jack was recognized by most of them. A lot of them had seen his interview several days prior. Most of them had kind words for him, polite expressions of support for him and words of encouragement. He was starting to feel glad that he had come. He felt like he was returning home, even though he had no plans of restarting his life on Earth. Even so, coming here felt like a victory. He felt like he had made some contribution, however small, towards making this happen.

Upon landing at the spaceport on the outskirts of Melbourne, he was met by a small contingent of UN troops acting as an honor guard. Most of the people on his shuttle were not actually going to be part of the ceremony, but were just going to be simple attendants for the symbolic handing-over. He, of course, was different. He was escorted from the landing site to a waiting vehicle, inside of which was Earth's newly-reappointed ambassador to the United Nations Assembly, Jonas Fisher. Fisher had been on Cerelis when Earth had fallen and so had escaped death at the hands of the invading rebels, but he had resigned his position and joined the Navy with a vow to not return to his old job until Earth was back in human hands.

Once Jack was seated in the vehicle and they were underway, the ambassador extended a hand to him. “Welcome back to Earth, Mr. Squier,” he greeted him warmly. “It's an honor to shake your hand. I've seen you on the news broadcasts a few times, and of course I've read your book.”

“Already?” Jack inquired, slightly amazed. He took the ambassador's hand. “Heh...You must be a quick reader. It's only been out for a few days. And please...just Jack is fine. I've heard 'Mr. Squier' enough to make me sick of the words.”

“Jack, then.” Ambassador Fisher shook his hand firmly. “I managed to acquire an advance copy. I couldn't put it down. A fascinating tale. I'm sure it'll be an inspiration to generations of our people to come. You'd make quite an ambassador yourself, I'm sure.”

“I don't know about all that,” Jack said, reddening slightly. “I just survived. Nothing really special about it.”

“Now you're just being modest.” Fisher pulled a cigar from his pocket and lit it, rolling down the window on his side of the vehicle in deference to his companion. “You know, it might seem petty, but of all the things that Earth has been through these past five years, I'm glad that Cuba made it through alright. Nothing as good as a nice cigar in the afternoon. This is the first I've had since the planet fell.” He took a puff and blew the smoke out of the window with great relish, then looked at Jack. “You ready for the ceremony?”

Jack shrugged. “I guess,” he said. “I'm not really sure what to expect.”

“Ah, the usual for this sort of thing,” Fisher told him, waving a hand dismissively. “Some Ailian dignitaries will be there, some Nuretan representatives, and of course a lot of UN people. They haven't even told me who will be there. Security stuff. I guess they're still a little worried about it, but I'm not. The planet has been swept time and time again since it was retaken.” He smirked. “A little paranoia can be forgiven, though, I suppose.”

“Even paranoid people have enemies,” Jack said with a smirk of his own. “I forget who said that.”

“Kissinger, I think,” Fisher said. “Another wise saying from another turbulent point in Earth history. Eh, who cares? This is supposed to be a happy occasion. We'll leave the paranoia to the people who make paranoia their profession.” He slapped Jack on the shoulder. “So anyway, you don't need to do too much. There's a big reception hall type of building near the center of the city that we're using for the ceremony. You'll be in the receiving line for when the foreign dignitaries come in, sort of near the front with me. Shake hands, say a few greetings, then the ceremony will begin. Like I said, nothing major.”

Jack nodded. “Fine.” He looked out of the window as the rest of the ride passed in silence, gazing at the buildings of Melbourne as the vehicle traveled through the streets. Just from looking at this city, he wouldn't have been able to tell that a major battle had been fought on the planet. Probably why they picked it to be the sight of the ceremony. Much easier to have a joyful occasion if the setting was placid.

******

Jack tugged at his collar as he stood in the receiving line at the reception hall. As much as the ambassador had talked down the formality of the event, things were looking very formal, indeed. Jack had brought his best suit with him, and he still looked underdressed compared with the rest of the attendants. Of course, there were military officers there, clad in their best dress uniforms, and most of the politicians and ambassadorial officials were wearing suits of a much more expensive cut than his. He wasn't used to wearing fancy stuff anyway, not since he'd retired from the military. He had made one concession to formality, however. Pinned to his lapel was a miniature version of his “wings of gold”, the badge that all fighter pilots wore on their uniforms. Even though he had never seen real combat in the cockpit of a fighter, he had worked hard to earn them, and wearing them made him feel just a little bit like he belonged in the room with all of these people.