Traitor (11 page)

“What?”

“The other one. They said seven left. There are six of you. Who’s missing? Gareth?”

“Gareth?” he parroted.

“Yes, Gareth. Chubby man who rarely leaves your side. I assume he left with you.”

Desmond coughed as the others looked around in confusion. “Ah, I saw him chatting up a fine-looking woman earlier. He’ll find his own way home when he’s finished with her.”

My skin itched. “Get some sleep. You’ll have a long day tomorrow.”

But I was the only one who went indoors. The others lingered, and the scene was likely repeated to everyone else within the hour. I heard Carl’s voice outside, but nobody came near me, and I was glad for that. I didn’t want them to try to talk me down. We needed to be a team, and that meant making sacrifices. Eddie had told me they needed to respect me. Maybe it was time to harden my heart some more.

I slept little that night. Early the next morning, I threw caution to the wind and ran around knocking on doors to gather everyone outside. Carl had slept elsewhere.

I stalked up and down in front of too many sullen faces, desperately trying to figure out what I wanted to say. In the end, I spoke my mind.

“Okay, we all know where we stand. You’ve all had plenty of time to discuss yesterday’s events. Now it’s my turn to talk. I want to point you all to the exit. If you take it, don’t come back. I’ve never asked to be in charge, but I went through a lot of hassle to get you here. Folsom died, and Mrs. Yaga died, but I’m not planning on dying, least of all for people who are willing to throw their lives away. Risk yourself all you want, do whatever it is you want to do, but do it far away from here. I won’t allow you to put everyone else at risk. I don’t care who you are—or what you are—because we’re all in the same situation. I believe we’re safer together, but if you think differently, then you can go.” I pointed toward the mouth of the cul-de-sac. “This isn’t a prison. You can leave at any time. Just don’t expect to come back after risking the safety of us all. That’s all I have to say.”

“This is ridiculous,” Desmond called out. “This is worse than before, worse than the Council even. We can’t even have any fun? We’re stuck here, in yet another prison, being dictated to by a tainted child. It’s insulting.”

Murmurs ran through the crowd of people.

“Off you go then,” I said. “Don’t like it? Leave. This is
my
home. You don’t get to squat. Find your own place, follow your own rules. I’m not going to stop you, but I’ve had enough of this shit.”

He spluttered for a couple of seconds. “And where do you expect us to go?”

“I don’t care.” I walked away.

Carl followed me into my garden, blocking my way before I entered the house.

“You sure you want to do this?”

I glanced back at the crowd of people having a heated discussion mere metres away. “Very.”

“Okay. Does this mean you get to pick what we watch every single night now?”

“Oh, shut up! This isn’t funny, Carl.”

He grinned. “It’s a little funny. Mostly Desmond’s face was hilarious.”

“Take this seriously! They took the piss yesterday. They could have been picked off or led anyone here.”

“Pretty sure everyone knows where we live already.”

“Again, shut up! Is Gareth back yet?”

He shook his head.

“See? How am I supposed to protect them from themselves?”

He held up his hands. “You proved your point. We get it. We’ll be more serious about everything.”

I scowled. “I shouldn’t have to convince people to keep themselves alive. That includes you.”

His smile disappeared. “You don’t know what it’s like to be stuck here while you come and go.”

My mouth dropped open. “You’re not stuck here at all! But the ones wanted by the Council can’t exactly wander the streets. It wasn’t my idea to make them outlaws! Jesus, do you think I want to deal with Eddie and the million other people who don’t trust me? I’d much rather stay here and let somebody else do all of the work.”

“We’re sitting around like children, doing nothing apart from waiting for you to come back, never knowing if you
will
come back. Can’t you understand?”

“Understand that you think being here is
nothing
? Protecting these people is
nothing
? My neighbours were fine before I brought everyone here. Mrs. Yaga was alive before we arrived. These people have lost everything because of us. The least we can do is keep them safe!”

I turned my back on him and stormed into my house. It wasn’t working. I couldn’t lead, and nobody took me seriously, not even my friends. We had won a few battles, but we weren’t close to winning the war. We didn’t even know who exactly we were fighting against half the time. Danger swarmed me every day. Life with me had been so risky that Peter had taken Emmett away.

I glanced at the window and saw them all outside, obviously discussing leaving me, too. I couldn’t blame them. I was so sick of kissing arse on their behalf, of trying to persuade people who hated me that the Council were the ones in the wrong. It was exhausting and made me feel like a crappy politician half the time. That wasn’t what I signed up for. I wanted to help people, but I didn’t want bloody hands for the rest of my life.

Val walked over and knocked on my door. I took my time opening it.

She studied my face. “It’s the battle. It heats up your blood and anything less than that is anticlimactic. Waiting for the next battle makes you warm but gives your violence nowhere to go.”

“I’m not Peter. I’m not you, either.”

She shrugged. “Come. Hear the people talk. Stop hiding away like a coward.”

“I
will
hit you.”

“And will that make you feel better?”

“Possibly. I’m feeling pretty happy about taking the chance.”

She smiled, gripped my shoulder, and guided me out of the house. “I told you that you should get more involved with training. You could hit me as often as you liked then.”

“Don’t actually want to break my hand.” I glanced at her. “Are your tattoos imbued with something, Val?”

She traced the swirls on her temples as if she knew them by heart, her expression grim. “Raven gave me bloodlust to help me kill my father.”

I wasn’t quite sure what to say to that.

“Ah, here she is,”
Cam
called as we approached, his smug expression provoking those violent urges again. He wrapped an arm around my shoulders. “I know you’re all angry,” he said loudly, “but give her a chance to apologise. After all, she’s grieving still over the loss of her man.”

I caught his jaw with my fist before Val got between us. I spewed heat and hatred from my eyes as I glared at him.

“Want to talk about Peter?” I asked. “Fine. Tell me when you first heard about him,
Cam
. Tell me who sent you to him when Emmett was taken. Were you the one who saved Peter’s life? Or were you just the one who made him forget it happened?”

At first there was silence, but a brief glimpse of something in
Cam
’s expression spurred me on. Gabe’s warnings and hints had grown in my mind; I was convinced we were surrounded by traitors, and I couldn’t hold back anymore.

“What are you really working toward,
Cam
?” I asked in a low voice.

“Kate,” he said, “get your things. We’re going.”

Kate glanced at Lorcan anxiously. “But we’re safe here.”

“We’re not safe anywhere.” He sneered at me. “And you don’t get to question me, half-breed. I don’t have to answer to the likes of you.”

“
Cam
,” Val said, “is she right?”

“You shouldn’t be blindly following her,” he said in a harsh voice, his mask slipping. “I brought you to Folsom. We should have left as soon as he died.”

“And gone where?” Val asked. “There’s nowhere out there for us.”

“You’ll all die here,”
Cam
said.

Carl held up his hand. “Enough. If anyone wants to leave, then go. This is pointless.”

“We opened our homes to you all,” Anka said. “If that isn’t enough, nothing will ever be.” She patted my arm and strolled toward her house as if she didn’t have a care in the world.

“Kate, we’re leaving,”
Cam
said. “Val, have Leah ready to go within the hour.”

“I’m not going,” Leah said sullenly. “It might not be freedom, but it’s way better than the Council’s cells.” She followed Anka.

“There’s my answer,” Val said, patting my arm.

“Don’t go,” Lorcan pleaded, moving closer to Kate.

Sadness flashed across her face, and I knew she wasn’t going to stay.

“Another lifetime maybe,” he said, and the twins moved to stand next to Val.

Cam
gripped Kate’s arm. “Get ready.”

“We’ll come with you,” Desmond said.

Cam
looked him over with disgust. “And get us both killed? No, thanks.”

In the end, ten decided to go, leaving us with close to thirty again. Ry stayed, but I couldn’t smile at him, couldn’t do anything to make the separation of our group feel like the right thing. We were tired and disconnected, but I would make sure that we were the ones to survive. I couldn’t let
Cam
be right.

I returned to my home alone, unable to watch the goodbyes. When my phone rang, I smiled to see Emmett’s name. It felt like summer had returned.

“Hey, kid.”

“Ava?” His voice sounded strained.

“You okay?”

“I never hear from you. I thought something had happened, and Dad was afraid to tell me.”

I blew out a sigh. “I’m sorry. I don’t mean to worry you.”

“You sound funny.”

“It’s been a tough day. Some people left us.”

“How come?”

“They didn’t trust me to keep them safe.”

“Then they’re stupid,” he said sharply.

I grinned. “It’s good to hear you.”

“But you never call me.”

“Thinking about calling you makes me miss you.”

“Oh.”

I imagined him pulling out his eyebrows in distress and decided I needed to change the subject. “How’s your grandfather?”

“I have to call him Bill. He’s okay. Is Dita all right?”

“Yeah. She’s busy training so she can kick your arse when you come back.”

“Am I ever coming back?”

I sighed. “I don’t know. How are your dreams?”

He hesitated. “Yvonne shaved my head, but my eyebrows are gone instead. Dad says I’m getting better, though.”

“Maybe being away from here will make it all go away.”

He made a non-committal grunt. “I should go. Dad’s calling me. I miss you, Ava.”

When he hung up, I pushed the phone away and laid my head on the kitchen table, my stomach in knots. I wished I knew if I was on the right path, if I was doing the right thing for everyone I cared about. But I never knew which step was the one that would lead to death and despair.

I didn’t know if a step existed that would lead to a happy, normal life.

I sat impatiently at a bus stop on the north side of the city centre. Moses’s phone call earlier in the day had made our meeting seem urgent, but what could be worth the staring of little old ladies who refused to sit next to me?

“What?” I finally asked.

The old woman who had been staring at me rubbed her chin. “Are you the one? The one in the paper and all? Is that you?”

I sighed. “Probably.”

“The hair gives you away.” She edged closer to me. “My son told me that he saw a video of you on his computer.”

“Oh, yeah?” Why on earth was she sidling up next to me all of a sudden?

“He said you killed all of those vampires, and—”

“It wasn’t just me.”

“But you were out there, not like yer man on the telly, the one with the blue lipstick.”

I smiled. “He’s an arsehole. Don’t mind him.”

“He was on the news yesterday, saying we should give up our laws and the gardaí to let his people take care of us instead.”

I sat up straight. “Are you serious?”

“Do you not watch the news, love? He was going on about the new royal marriage and all that. How it would protect us if we team up with the
UK
. My son’s fella reckons they’ll make us slaves or something if we do that, but I says to him, in this day and age? I think he has his head stuck in the past, afraid we’ll lose our flag or something stupid like that. He’s a nice boy, but he gets over-excited sometimes.”

“He has the right idea,” I said firmly. “You can’t trust the man with the blue lipstick. Or the fae royal crap. They don’t care about humans. They don’t care about flags or any of that. They just want power, and they’ll cut through us all to get it.”

Her hand flew up to her mouth. “Jaysus, you make it sound terrible.”

A car swerved around the corner and skidded to a stop right in front of us.

Moses leaned out of the window and nodded at the woman. “All right, missus? Need a lift?”

She held her hand over her heart. “Ah, no. Thanks anyway.”

“Hop in,” he said to me. “We don’t have much time.”

The old woman waved at me as I jumped into the car. Moses sped off before I snapped my seatbelt into place.

“How the hell do you get away with driving like this?” I demanded.

“Untouchable,” he said. “Light up a joint for me. In the glove box.”

“I’m not your slave.”

“Women,” he huffed.

“The woman at the bus stop was telling me that Erossi was on the news yesterday.”

He grunted. “Yeah, the prick’s trying to convince the nation to bend over and take it in the arse.”

“Think people are listening to him? Shay said people aren’t feeling good about the world being full of supernaturals.”

“They’ll get over it,” he said lightly. “But the Council are making bad moves. They arrested a pile of humans this morning. You need to get them out of there.”

“Why did they arrest them?”

“Some crap about inciting violence against supernaturals. They made a few poxy comments online. This shit will go viral if I have anything to do with it.”

“Why would they care about humans?” I said. “They never have before.”

“Between this and your man hinting about taking over everything, I’d say they want us all scared.”

I shook my head in disbelief. “They’re really stupid if they think that’s going to go down well. What’s Erossi thinking?”

“I dunno, but they’re making people want change. They’re doing what we’ve been trying to do, except they’re doing a better job of it. It makes no sense.”

“Where are we going?”

Moses flashed a dimpled grin. “I’m taking you to Shay.”

“What? Why?”

“Ask
him
. I’m just the fucking messenger boy. I have to say, Ava, you did a good job at the flats with Father Fat Fuck.”

“Father Ryan,” I corrected, but I couldn’t help smiling. “What do you mean?”

“He’s changed his tune, comes over for a cup of tea in the mornings and everything. He’s been convincing the older crowd that we need to keep fighting. They’re tired, but to be honest, most of them seem delighted for the excitement.”

“Leave them alone.”

“It’s true. They have more balls than some of the young lads.”

“Does he think I’m a monster?” I asked. “Father Ryan, I mean. Everyone saw the beasts as monsters, and I’m basically a version of them. Kind of.”

He guffawed. “Are ya mad? Me ma would break his face if he started calling you a monster. You and your crowd helped us. No way is anyone in my neighbourhood going to get away with badmouthing you. All of this shit has really brought the community together. We’re fixing up the place, people are getting along, and all the bullshit arguments over who copied whose fitted kitchen are done with.” He winked at me. “If we can do that, the whole country can.”

“I don’t know if I can help with that. I can’t even keep the rebels together. A bunch of them left because I gave them a bollocking for sneaking off to the pub. One didn’t come back, and I can’t stop thinking about him.”

He slowed down and opened the glove box to take out a joint. He lit it up and took a few drags. “Thing is, there are a lot of missing cases right now. Ask Shay. Numbers have gone through the roof. I’ve been hearing stories, and I’m thinking they’re connected. We have to be more careful, or else we have to speed up this shit.”

I shrugged. “I don’t know if we’ll ever be ready.”

“Nobody’s ever ready for anything. You just go for it. We weren’t ready for the beasts, but we crushed them.”

I didn’t tell him that was because we had werewolves on our side. If we made a move now, the werewolves would be against us. I didn’t know if we stood a chance.

“Here we are,” he said, pulling in next to a pretty dilapidated-looking building.

“And here is?”

“Where you’ve to meet Shay. Just run in. You’ll find him. I have to fly off before I get spotted. That’s why I drive so fucking fast. See you later. Tell your hot friends Moses said hello.”

I punched his shoulder and got out. Moses sped off before I stepped away from the car.

Inside the building, I looked around in confusion. When Moses told me Shay needed to meet, I hadn’t assumed I would be walking into a boxing club full of pre-teens. I strolled past groups of classes until I spotted Shay at the end, laughing with a group of boys and girls.

He saw me and waved, holding up his hands to the kids and jogging over to me.

“Hey,” he said, rubbing the back of his neck with a towel. “Sorry about the noise, but it was the only chance of me getting five minutes to myself all week.”

“You’re sweating.”

He grinned. “Exercise tends to do that to me. We run classes here, and I haven’t had much chance to beat up on the kids lately, so they put me through the wringer today.”

“You teach them?”

He paused. “I’m not the only one.”

“I know, but…” I glanced around, sure I recognised some of the kids from Moses’s flats. “You volunteer?”

“We all do. Like I said, I’m not the only one. Gives the kids a place to go. Right now, they need that more than ever. Maybe after everything settles, some of your crowd can join in.”

A boy stopped on his way out to exchange banter with Shay. The garda took his time with the kid, giving him his full attention. I stared at him after the kid moved on.

“What?” Shay asked, looking uncomfortable.

“You’re like… disgustingly perfect.”

His face broke into a grin. “And yet you still manage to stay mad at me for extended periods of time.”

I blew out a sigh.
Time to make nice.
“I’m not mad at you, Shay.”

“Don’t say you’re disappointed,” he joked. “I understand why you were annoyed with me. I don’t understand why you’re
still
annoyed.”

His pulse began to race, and I smiled.

“What are you smiling at?”

I shook my head. “Nothing. I’m getting over all of that, and it shouldn’t interfere with what we’re trying to do, right?”

“C’mon.” He led me to a messy little office at the end of the hall. “Need water,” he explained, rooting through a bag on the desk. “And no,” he said after he had drunk half a bottle. “It won’t interfere. I’d like to clear the air despite that, though.”

I stared at his hands as he spoke. He had strong hands, calloused, but not by weapons. His brown eyes were honest and true. There were no games to play with Shay, no worries that we couldn’t trust him. I liked him, and that was why I was so mad at him.

“You have to understand,” I began, suddenly desperate for him to see. “Very few people in my life have treated me like a… like a person. My grandmother treated me like shit because she was afraid of some angel, afraid of what I would grow up to be. Peter saw me as a monster. I’m pretty sure he still does on some level.”

“Ava, that’s not what—”

“The supernatural people see me as a mongrel who could ruin them. People want things from me. They come to me for favours or help, but they don’t actually like me. They don’t see me as a person or someone with actual feelings. They see me as a killer or a soldier or a monster. You were nice to me, and you saw me as somebody who could actually have a normal life.
I
could be normal around you. That felt great, but as soon as you knew more, you became just like everyone else.” I shrugged. “It was like you took something away from me, and it hurt.”

He stepped closer, but I inched back. He reached out but then dropped his hand, looking as if he didn’t have a clue what to do. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have acted the way I did. It was the way Peter told it. I don’t know. It just got my back up, and I saw every lie written on your face. I was wrong, and I’m sorry.”

I didn’t like apologies. They felt like a way of glossing over what had really happened, an invitation to forget whatever had made me mad, whether I was ready to or not. But Shay was sincere, and I really did want to stop being angry with him. I had enough enemies. “Well, now we’ve got that uncomfortable exchange out of the way,” I said, half-laughing.

“How are you?” he asked earnestly. “The truth this time.”

“I’ll be fine. I’m tired and sore and sick of everything, but we’ve a rebellion to organise.”

He smiled. “I wish we could hurry it up. I’m sick of having to talk to that blue-lipped immortal. He’s unbelievably arrogant, and I probably shouldn’t tell him what I think of him.”

“I heard about yesterday.”

His hands closed into fists. “He didn’t even warn us he was going to do it. Totally went behind our backs, and now I can’t get in touch with him at all.”

“He’s pretty horrible, but be grateful you don’t have to deal with Fionnuala. She’s back, and things are out of control. The rebels, the humans, everyone. There are a lot of angry people flooding into the country, ready to take their revenge. If anyone moves too soon…”

He nodded. “That’ll be the hardest part, especially after the change. We can’t even trust the people who are returning. There will be those who never cared about what we’re doing; they just want an excuse to hurt and gain some kind of vengeance. The next few years are going to be tricky.”

My stomach churned at the thought. “I’m scared of what will happen when there’s no more Council.”

“Me, too. But they haven’t given us a choice. Even if you hadn’t made any moves to change things, something would have happened to force the situation eventually. Like the Council’s actions right now. Arresting humans for speaking out?” He shook his head. “They’re up to something. I just can’t figure out what they’re trying to accomplish.”

“Moses thinks fear, and yet, they’re basically making people feel the way
we
want them to feel. How does that make sense?”

“My gut doesn’t like it.”

“Tell your gut I agree. Maybe we can use this. It’s a mistake on their part, and we’d be stupid to let it go without taking advantage of it.”

He switched back into garda mode. “Any suggestions?”

“Two of Esther’s Circle are doing some digging. They’re trying to prove us wrong, but they might come up with something we can use. Carl and Val are still trying to track down that magical tattooist. In the meantime, we need to get the press involved. I was talking to somebody earlier, and I really think the general public are confused. They need some clarity before they make their decisions.”

“So,” he said, “you need me to sow some seeds?”

I shrugged. “I think it’s time we up our game. You could possibly feed the reporters stories of the Council’s wrongdoings. So far, they’ve been mainly focused on the Irish Government. What if they showed the dark side of the Council’s interests and really pushed our agenda against Erossi’s idea of taking over?”

“I like it,” he said. “It’s a modern way of thinking, one they probably won’t know how to fight against. I mean, they can do the same to you, paint you in a bad light, but we could probably come up with a lot more fodder. Our friends in the media are ready to go when the shit hits the fan. In the meantime, do you think you could get some people to give interviews?”